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Author: Nalva Martins
last update Last Updated: 2023-07-21 01:29:12

Evy,

Later tonight...

I open the front door eagerly anticipating a long bath, craving to devour dinner, and then simply collapse into my bed. However, upon seeing Mary standing in my living room with a pitying expression, my energy renews, and I hurry towards the second room down the narrow hallway. I stop, frozen, as I spot my mother sitting at the edge of her bed, rocking back and forth, her gaze distant.

"She's not doing well today," Mary comments, coming to a stop beside me.

"What happened?" She lets out an audible sigh.

"I don't know. Judy simply refused to take her meds and started saying she was seeing her father in the room. I tried to calm her down, but she wouldn't stop screaming, and when she finally did, she became like this."

"Damn it, Mary, why didn't you call me?"

"And disrupt your second day of work?"

"But, Mary, she's my mother!"

"Yes, I know. And you need that job to help her." I exhale sharply and move closer to my mother. I place my hands on her shoulders, but she doesn't even look me in the eyes. Her gaze remains fixed on the wall behind me.

"Hi, sweetheart!" I whisper, forcing a smile at her. But nothing happens, not even a flicker of response. Judy simply seems not to be here with us. "Sorry for taking so long, but I'm here now. Can you see?" I try to sound enthusiastic, though I don't feel it at the moment.

"Evy, Judy needs help!" Mary insists. I close my eyes and hold back tears. However, she's right. I can't help her if I can't be near her all the time. "Marina can't keep stealing sedatives from the hospital. She could lose her job."

"I know!" I reply softly and dispiritedly.

"I've been researching some nursing homes with reasonable monthly fees, and they'll take good care of her for you. I left some contacts and brochures on the table."

"Thank you, Mary!" I straighten up and walk out of the room. In the living room, I bid farewell to our neighbor, shut the door, and sink weakly into a chair at the four-seater table. I gaze at some papers and letters on the surface and, with a tired sigh, I grasp a leaflet bearing the name San Tiago Nursing Home - Casa de Repouso São Tiago, and I start reading, allowing the tears to flow freely.

"Sorry, Mom!" I bow my head and surrender to the painful moment."

***

Some days…

The place isn't entirely bad, and the monthly fees fit perfectly into my budget, leaving me some spare time for extra work if needed. I think to myself as I walk through the rooms of the nursing home alongside Larissa Krill, the administrator. A room just for her with a bathroom, a small wardrobe, and a single bed next to a wide window overlooking a beautiful and inviting garden. The room isn't very spacious, but it's well-lit, and the connection with nature could help her. Larissa assures me of support from a psychologist and other professionals. However, separating from my only family is tearing me apart inside.

"And then?" The woman looks at me expectantly over her glasses, and before responding, I glance once more at the cozy little room.

"I liked it!" I finally say, and she gives me a half-smile. "When can I bring her?"

"First, you need to fill out some documents and a form with all your mother's details. We need to know every little thing about her, Evy. Then, you need to pay the first month's fee in advance. It's just a way for us to cover some initial expenses, and then you can bring her."

"Alright, I'll do that as soon as possible! Thank you, Larissa!"

I leave the nursing home satisfied, although with a heavy heart, knowing it's the best for her. Now, I'll need another job to ensure my survival and pay off our house's mortgage, and who knows, maybe we can move back there? Arriving home, I dedicate myself to keeping her company because I'll have her close for just a few more days, and I want to make the most of the time we have left together. At night, I fill out a lengthy form, making sure not to miss any details, and have dinner alone as I've been doing for the past few days. Mrs. Judy spent the entire day rambling, and that's worrying. Getting the advance for the monthly fee was the easiest thing to accomplish, surprisingly. I was taken aback by that, but my boss made it quite manageable. I need to remember to thank him on Monday. The start of the week was the toughest part of my life. After leaving her at the nursing home and being sure she'd be alright, I went straight to D'Angelo's, and as expected, my mind was constantly focused on my latest decision. I even thought about going back and taking her out of there, but what then?

"What have you done this time?!" Dylan asks, his tone filled with concern as he enters the kitchen. I simply stare at him, completely without a reaction, unsure if I've truly done something wrong. Probably yes, but I'm not certain.

"I... I don't know!" I stammer, disoriented. God, I can't afford to lose this job! I repeat in a form of prayer, as now I

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