CHAPTER 015: EMILY

Between serving the customers and getting verbal pushes from Kevin to accept the offer, the rest of the shift passed in a blur.

As I walked back to my apartment, I reminded myself about the reason why I wanted to join a BDSM club in the first place. I craved so many things: The excitement, the pain with the pleasure and the loss of control– which for me, was the most intriguing one. I was hesitant in bed, always overthinking every move I made, wondering if I was good enough. It took all the pleasure away, and I couldn't enjoy myself. But by having someone else call the shots, I could let go in a way I haven't been able to do before.

In a way, I was taking control by letting go of it.

My mind was working overtime, trying to find out what I should say to Chris when I called him. It was even more nerve-wracking than when I was ordering takeout.

Hi, Chris– Nope, I couldn't start the conversation like that.

Mr. Cross, I would like to accept your offer. Was that too formal?

Hi, It's Emily Fi