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Chapter 6: Cole

Author: owlonmywrist
last update Huling Na-update: 2023-01-31 09:33:57
I’ve been so pissed at Kent lately and fucking pent up because it has been MONTHS since I last got laid. I’ve been jacking it to straight porn this whole time, trying to rewire my brain. To stop wanting guys as badly as I do.

And it doesn’t fucking work.

Do you know how difficult it is to want something so bad, that your body needs it so much, but your mind, your upbringing keeps telling you it’s wrong?

I thought that it would be ok if I was watching it with a girlfriend. If she was enjoying it too.

But now? I’m alone. I can’t say that I’m doing this to get the girl going. This is just for me. And it scares me. That maybe, just maybe, this is who I am. And that my family will never accept me. If I can’t push away these urges, these needs, then I might lose the people that I love more than anything.

But what will it hurt to just look? Not participate, just…watch. With COVID, I won’t be around other guys. No one other then Kent. And, well, that’s going so well
owlonmywrist

Let the grovelling commence! If you've read all of my stuff on iPad and are looking for something more to read, you can find my book Misfit Trials for free on Watt Pad.

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Mga Comments (4)
goodnovel comment avatar
owlonmywrist
I grew up in a small town and say several people go through this. I feel bad for him.
goodnovel comment avatar
owlonmywrist
BWHAHAHAHA!!
goodnovel comment avatar
Melody Cawthra
I find it sad that Cole has to hide who he is to gain acceptance from his family. It’s creating an necessary confusion for him. That being said, I hope Kent can help him discover himself.
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  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 7: Cole

    The feeling of Kent’s hot, wet mouth around my cock is so fucking good. That, combined with the fapping I did before has me close to the edge in no time flat. Kent is also deep-throating me like a mother fucker, the sound of him gagging on my cock pushing me further and further toward cumming. “I’m gonna cum if you keep that up,” I mutter, hoarsely. He pulls back off of my cock and looks up at me. Tears are streaming down his face from how far he’s pushed himself on my cock. Slobber covers his chin. And desire fills his eyes. He’s never looked sexier. In a voice hoarse from pushing my cock so far down his throat, he says, “Give it to me. I want to taste you.” “Fuck!” I whisper. He gives me one last cocky grin before licking up my cock, from base to head. He maintains eye contact the whole time and my cock throbs against his mouth. “Kent…” I whisper. The desire in his eyes turns almost molten and he takes me into his mouth as deep as he can go. He sucks hard enoug

    Huling Na-update : 2023-02-02
  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 8: Kent

    I can’t believe how fucking good sex with Cole is. He has a huge cock and he fucking knows how to use it. Not to mention the things that this man knows how to do with his tongue. God, I’ve wanted this man for years. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve jerked myself off to images of him so many times. Plus, the fact that he’s a good friend of mine and that I love just hanging out with him makes him all the more attractive. The problem is that I’ve been hurt way too many times before. Particularly by guys that were in the closet or partially there, but also just by relationships in general. I was engaged once before. He was a guy from college, Stephen. He honestly could have been related to Cole, they look that much alike. Tall, broad shouldered, tanned skin with beefy arm muscles and abs that you could fucking grate cheese on. And don’t get me going on how God damned tight their asses are. Or how you fall into the sky blue of their eyes like you were going sky diving an

    Huling Na-update : 2023-02-07
  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 9: Cole

    August… “You can’t be serious! This has got to be some kind of horrible fucking joke!” I’m nearly screaming into the phone as I talk with Jeff Carpenter, the general manager of the Hayes Mansion. “Do you know how much of my life I’ve given to that fucking place? You can’t do this to me, Jeff!” “Look, Cole. It’s not like I want to do this, but the big wigs at Hilton have made themselves clear. COVID has hit hard. No one is coming to luxury hotels and we have to cut the departments that are making less than 50% profit. I’ve been trying to keep you on, but you’ve been below 30% profitability for three months now. I can’t keep you or your people on. I’m sorry, but it’s out of my hands,” Jeff says. “If it’s any consolation, I won’t take anyone but you when we get this up and running. You’ll have a job to come back to.” That does mollify me a bit, but not much. “I appreciate that, Jeff, but what do I do until then? No one knows when this shit is going to end. How am I su

    Huling Na-update : 2023-02-09
  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 10: Cole

    I’m really thankful that Kent is here right after my lay off phone call. The trip to the gym is exactly what I need. Trevor was fine with us stopping by to grab the keys from him as long as we brought him a case of beer. Neither of us really wanted to stop by the liquor store on the way there, but I knew there were several cases of imported beer at the Mansion and I had absolutely no trouble stopping by there on the way and yanking it right up. What are they gonna do, fire me? On the way there, I fill Kent in on everything that Jeff said. How all of the people that I work with are going to be effected and that that worries me more than anything that’s going to happen to me. I can figure something out, but some of these people don’t have the education or the options to do anything other than what they are doing. And there’s no way that they would get as much money as they had been making at the Mansion because they had been there for so long. I actually end up getting myself ev

    Huling Na-update : 2023-02-11
  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 11: Cole

    I AM BORED! Like, pulling my hair out, screaming my head off bored. This whole not having a job thing is not for me. Add to that the fact that we are stuck in the apartment 24/7 and I’m going insane! I hate TV, unless I’m watching porn. I really only go online to find information about recipes and food trends. When I’m not working, I’m surfing, hiking, biking, or doing a pick up game of tennis. I love hanging out with people, cooking, and being outside. This shit fucking sucks. I have nothing to occupy my day. I have got to be bugging the hell out of Kent, but he’s been surprisingly chill. I think it’s because of the regular sex. He likes it when I take my frustration out on his ass. Or his mouth. I wake him up in the morning, fuck him at lunch, and rock his world to sleep at night. I think he likes it. That man is a nymphomanic. Weird thing is that he’s been sleeping in my room lately. Like, curling right up with me at night. That wasn’t something that we did

    Huling Na-update : 2023-02-14
  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 12: Cole

    December… I stare at the Excel spreadsheet on my computer screen, running one hand through my hair. My budget was not looking good for the coming months. Especially with Christmas at the end of the month, this was not looking good at all. The second I got laid off, I canceled nearly every subscription service that I had. I was sad to see my subscriptions to Men’s Health and Next Door Studios go, but I could get a lot of the workout and nutrition information online and I had my own little nympho sharing my apartment and my bed every night. I didn’t really need to watch other guys fucking when I could just call Kent into the room with me and go at him anyway I wanted. Dude is a freak and he loves my cock however I want to give it to him. We also had a rooftop garden on our building that several neighbors and I had petitioned our landlord to start several years ago, so that cut down on some of our produce budget, especially since I canned and pickled some of them. But even w

    Huling Na-update : 2023-02-16
  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 13: Kent

    When Cole had his little mini panic attack about his money situation, it was all that I could do to calm him down. I had just wanted to pull him into my arms and make everything better for him. Here lately, that’s what I’ve been wanting to do more than anything: Make Cole as happy as possible. It’s…weird. I mean, we’ve been friends for as long as we’ve been roommates and, yeah, we’ve had a lot of great times together, but I can’t say that I’ve ever felt this need to…protect him, I guess you could say. I’ve never felt this urge to not only keep him physically safe, but to also care for his emotions. It’s a new feeling for me. Ok, well, not exactly new. I’ve felt it before when I thought that Stephen and I were in love. But that’s definitely not happening here. I’m definitely not in love with Cole. Not at all. We’ve made it very clear that this is a friends-with-benefits relationship only. I just really like being around him, always have. He’s funny, charming, witty, se

    Huling Na-update : 2023-02-18
  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 14: Cole

    Kent has returned to Zoom’s headquarters for several hours every day. The man has been like my own personal advertisement. By the end of the first week, Every person in his office his signed up for at least two days of me bringing them food. And I’ve got several people in the building also asking me for meanus so that I can make dinner several times a week. It’s awesome and it’s keeping me busy during the days that Kent isn’t there. By the end of January, I’ve got Zoom having me cater their Friday lunches, the bank on their bottom floor having me cater them on Thursdays, every person in our building getting at least one meal from me a week, and I have several people in buildings close by that want to set up a schedule. I’ve even been able to hire two of my kitchen guys to help me by delivering food and one of the sus chefs to help me on my busiest days to help with prep and packaging. Money’s starting to flow in and I’m definitely feeling a lot better about things right now.

    Huling Na-update : 2023-02-21

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  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Author's Note

    Hey friends! Thank you so much for reading Love in the Time of Quarantine. I hope that you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing. Here are a couple of announcements/interesting information for you. 1. If you are interested in what I listen to while I’m writing, you can find my playlist “Creative Juices” on Spotify. I love all different kinds of music, so there's a little something for everyone. 2. Other books on GoodNovel: Trio of Mates Series: 4 werewolf books that take on the idea of what would happen if one of the leadership was gay and couldn’t produce an heir. Lots of very graphic smut. (completed) Trio Legacy Series: The stories of the children of the wolves introduced in the Trio of Mates Series. Completed: Hide and Seek, Ongoing: Red Rover Dissonance and Harmony: The story of a high school girl who has to face her rapist at his sentencing hearing and deal with her PTSD from that night. Graphic violence and rape scenes. (completed) 3. Follow me under the same name

  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 30: Jorge

    I’m standing outside of the girls’ apartment, my old apartment, with a picnic basket of baked goods and a cooler with drinks, fruits, and icings to add. I have muffins, cinnamon rolls, danishes, cinnamon raisin bread, and fresh bagels. Ok, I went a little overboard. I can admit that. I’m just so fucking anxious about this whole thing that I don’t know how to handle my feelings right now. I had been awake when Andie had texted me last night, contemplating what Angel had said to me earlier that day. I’d actually been looking at pictures of Andie and Jaime on my phone when I got the text. We’d been so happy before this whole thing started. I miss them. So damn much and it took losing them to understand what I’d done wrong. I didn’t even have to think twice about it, I immediately texted her back that I would bring breakfast. And then I fell to sleep without any issue. Granted, I’d only gotten a few hours in bed, since I had to make deliveries to the bakery this morning.

  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 29: Jaime

    I’ve been tossing and turning in bed all night after listening to everything Angel and Maddie said tonight. “You three belong together.” “He loves you.” “He wants you back.” “What do you have to lose if you do call him?” I know what my heart wants. I also know what my heart is afraid is going to happen. How can I allow him to possibly hurt me, us, all over again? What’s the definition of insanity? Doing something the same way over and over again and expecting a different result? Wouldn’t it just be insanity to allow him back into our lives again and hoping for a different result. Though both Angel and Marta have said that he’s reducing his hours at the business, that they’ve hired a lot of new people, and that he’s learned his lesson. Could it be true? Could he have really changed for us, even if he didn’t think that we’d be there for him? I don’t know. We’ve been in bed since midnight and it’s 3 am. With a huge sigh, I get up and grab my robe. I tie the robe

  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 28: Andie

    Jaime and I go about making dinner in silence. We are a well oiled machine at this point, moving easily around each other in our kitchen. Angel and her partner Maddie are coming over tonight for dinner and to play cards. It’s something that we started up in college with Angel. A weekly card game. Each week, someone picks the game that we play and once a year, each of us is supposed to introduce a new card game. We use candy and snack foods for any games that require betting. It’s more to hang out and have fun than anything else. Maddie and Angel have been very careful of who they let in their circle, as have we, so we all feel comfortable being around each other, even with COVID still happening. Unfortunately, this is how much of our life has been since Jorge left. Just a silent orbit around each other. Hold each other through the tears and the pain. But not really talking. I mean, what was there to say? We were enough for each other, but not for the man that we love

  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 27: Jorge

    “Angel, do you have tomorrow’s shipment of bread all packaged? Carmello’s needs the delivery an hour early. I’d like to be able to have everything on rolling carts so I can just load up the trucks the second I get here,” I call to Angel. When she first started working with me, I had brought Angel on just as a delivery driver. But over the last two months, I have consciously tried to pull myself back from the business and I’ve made Angel a partner. We have three drivers, a part-time baker, and two part-time packagers. I’ve cut my hours back so that I’m working nine hour days, as opposed to the 16 hour days I was working before. The only reason that I’m driving tomorrow is because our early morning guy took tomorrow off. Otherwise, I’ve even built in my Wednesdays and Sundays as days off. “Yes, everythings all ready. Just waiting for the last batch to finish cooling before we get it packaged. I’ll get that done in the next hour,” Angel tells me. I let out a huge sigh. “O

  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 26: Jaime

    It’s been a week since our last interaction with Jorge. We’ve been communicating via text and notes left at the apartment. The morning after our break up, Jorge was gone by the time Andie and I woke up. He had packed a bag and left a note saying that he would be in and out while Andie and I were at work over the coming week. He’s moving into an apartment over his parents’ restaurant. It was a place that his dad used as an office and that one family member or another would crash at when they were in the dog house with their wives or girlfriends. Not a bad place, but also not a place for someone with as successful a business as Jorge’s. Unfortunately, with COVID still pretty bad, Jorge has elected to stay in a place where only family has been until things blow over a bit. Trying to decide what belongs to who out of our stuff over text is difficult. I had honestly thought that Jorge was the one. The guy that I was going to spend the rest of my life with. When we added Andie

  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 25: Andie

    In that way that grief between people who love each other will sometimes turn sexual, when Jorge turns to Jaime and kisses her, she kisses him back. I lean in and kiss the side of his face. He turns towards me and God does it feel good to kiss him. I’ve missed him so damn much. It’s been too damn long. Jaime brings his mouth back to her, their kiss hungry and desperate. My hands go to the bottom of the hoodie he’s wearing and I rip it off of him. Jaime finds his mouth again and I lean down, licking his nipples. He groans into Jaime’s mouth and his body tenses in his arousal. He loves having his nipples played with. At the same time, I rake my nails down his abs. Jorge pulls back from Jaime’s mouth to look down at me. “Please. I need you both.” His voice is so full of need. I look at Jaime, asking if she’s ok with this. Because this is going to be an end. Not a reconciliation. But I want this. I need him. Jaime nods, both of us seeing the motion. Jorge surg

  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 24: Jorge

    Andie looks between Jaime and me and seems to immediately know what’s going on. She’s always had that ability. To take a situation in at a glance and know exactly what is going on. I guess that’s what makes her so good at programming. And at calling me on my bullshit. Ever since the day that I triggered Jaime’s meltdown, Andie has been more aloof with me. I guess she realized that the promises that I made to her and Jaime, while heartfelt and genuine, weren’t ones that I could keep. I feel like the time that I managed to get after that was more for Jaime’s benefit than Andie’s. As introverted and quiet as she appears, Andie doesn’t take bullshit from anyone. She’s given me more rope than I deserve. But it seems that it was just enough for me to hang myself with. “How far are we into this conversation?” Andie asks. I stare at her, surprised at how calmly she can address this. Jaime is the one that answers. “I’ve told him that he isn’t treating us like priorities an

  • Love in the Time of Quarantine   Chapter 23: Jaime

    I’m sitting on the couch flipping through the channels on the TV when Jorge walks in. It’s been two days since our failed date and this is the first time that I’ve seen him in more then passing. He’s dressed in sweats and a tank, his hair wet from a shower. He must have just come back from a run. Andie and I have been sleeping in her old room ever since our failed date night. With the hours that he’s been keeping, I don’t really know what he’s up to. I don’t know that I really can muster up the ability to care. Each time I do, it just seems to hurt me a little more. “Hey…” Jorge says tentatively. He walks in the room and sits on the arm of the couch. I glance over at him. “Hey,” I say, turning my attention back to the TV. “Um…where’s Andie?” he asks, like he’s not sure what to say. “Doctor’s appointment and then grocery shopping.” My responses aren’t angry, but they are short and I don’t turn my attention back to him. Instead I give the remote the voice command to tu

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