Chapter 8

Coraline and I both made it to the Party venue and the bright and loud place welcomed us. There were lots of people and all of them were familiar since most of them were students from the Academy. 

"You sure you're going to be fine? Just enjoy, now that we're free to attend you know!" Coraline even whipped my back that I got even pushed away. 

I guess I'll try to enjoy. Especially when Aspen's shadow appears here, tonight. 

I nodded at her and grinned. "I will, you don't need to worry. Enjoy too!" 

"Pft, Karin! You're looking for him, aren't you?" I raised my brows on her. Acting like she's wrong but yes, she red my mind. "What? It's not like that. But honestly, I'm expecting for him to arrive."

 

Coraline chuckled loudly as she continued walking. "Nah~ he will absolutely come. Want to look for him?" 

"No! We went here to enjoy the party!" I responded. But it's a half lie for me. 

She clicked her tongue. "That's why we need to look for Aspen to make it more enjoyable!" 

I sighed and closed my eyes. She's intentionally pushing me close to Aspen's side just to make sure I'll be able to take a step to him. Yes, it's an advantage for me now yet I find it very embarrassing too. Mezakiel's my partner here and not Coraline.

"It's up to you if that's what you want--- Coraline? Hey!" I worriedly called when she's not beside me anymore. She's out of my sight! How fast was she to vanish like that?!

"Coraline?!" 

"Hey!" I called and called as I roamed all over the crowded place. Some people were even complaning every time I step on their feet or when I bump them. 

Where did she go? Seriously? She was so fast to leave me like that, I couldn't even find her already. 

Amidst my search, I hissed when my head bumped a hard thing. The edge was sharp that it really hurt my forehead. 

"O-Ouch, you better watch where you're aiming that---" I stopped myself from complaining and rubbing my forehead when I saw a guy who was holding a tray of drinks. 

He was surprised that he even froze from standing especially that the drinks on his tray got poured on his shirt. 

Right, his face was so shocked to see me but my reaction was doubled when I saw him. And I bumped the tray he's holding, the drinks got poured right to his shirt. 

"A-Aspen?! I'm so sorry, I didn't see where I was heading!" I nervously apologized and even took the tray he was holding. Aspen looked o surprise to see me here tonight but he managed to hold his shirt and stared at its soaked condition. 

It's because he was holding the tray that high, my poor head bumped it. My fault for being a bit short! 

I took my handkerchief from my pocket and was about to wipe his arm but his one hand grabbed my wrist. I looked at him. 

"I was the one who wasn't looking on my way and I didn't notice you," he apologized. "I have an extra shirt on my car. I'll be changing, my excuse." 

I bit my lower lip when his voice's tone was like he's asking me to not get bothered. "I didn't expect you to come here too." 

Eh? I widened my eyes on him and looked away, getting embarrassed. "I, well--- my friend asked me to come with her here then I suddenly lost her."

He chuckled despite getting soaked by the drinks he's about to serve. "She intended to let you enjoy the party by yourself, then?" 

I shook my head and pouted. In fact, Coraline left me to look for you so we could hang out for tonight. That's it.

"Sort of. But she didn't get that I want it more when she's staying with me all the time," I said. "Coraline's excited for this night." 

"What about you? Aren't you excited?" he asked with his head, tilting a bit. My heart skipped when he leaned his face closer, just to look at me clearly due to the dim light. "It looks like you're so prepared for this ocassion?" 

He's starting to make a move again! It's like he's unaware about this movements he's doing that I kept on tolerating. He's so sinful with these! 

I leaned away to prevent him from seeing my red face. "Of course I needed to prepare. It's so nice to see you here too, Aspen." 

At last, he stood up properly. Leaning his head away for now. Phew.

"My pleasure to talk to you again. I'll see you after I change my clothes from the car. Take your time looking for your friend," he stated as he bid good bye. I clenched my fist and automatically pulled the sleeve of his shirt. He looked at me again when he's about to walk away. 

What did I just do? I stared at him, feeling the suspense. I stopped him despite not saying anything. Okay, I was getting nervous. But I don't want to lose sight of him tonight. I'm afraid, that another person will meet him here, now. 

"A-Aspen?" I called. "I'll be accompanying you." 

 He creased his brows. "Eh?" 

"I mean! I will go with you," I added and my voice was getting lower. "I was not actually used to any parties like this and I get suffocated to the crowd when I'm alone." 

That was true after all, it's very hard to stand properly on a place like this in a long period of time. Especially when I'm not with someone. Maybe Coraline's just fine now, busy enjoying the party with the other people she knows. 

Aspen red the conversation and he seemed to understand me. I wasn't looking at his eyes. 

I slowly let go of his shirt but after that, his hand suddenly grabbed my wrist again. It made me part my lips. 

He was holding my wrist. Looking straightly into my eyes in the middle of the filled place where a loud music deafened the whole place. 

That stare he gave was far from how he looked at me when I confessed to him. I almost wanted to cover my face using the tray. 

"When you face me, please do not show that embarrassed face," he ordered in an authorized tone. I offered a 'what' look. 

He parted his lips. "When I glimpse at you who's giving a face like that. It reminds me of the scene wherln you're so done after confessing to me." 

"When I didn't know what to say. When I answered such a lame response that caught every people's attention, Karin," he added. His words carried guilt for me. Like there's regret from what he'd done back then. He wasn't bad when I was doomed from the crowd.

It was my fault why I made an awful scene. That I received a response from him like that. Aspen didn't need to get bothered about it! 

I breathed heavily and faced him seriously. "You did nothing wrong back then, Aspen! Don't feel so guilty!" 

He closed his eyes. "I didn't feel guilty. I only felt the disappointment out of the fact that I let you feel embarrassed from the witnesses. It's so hard to imagine it again and again." 

He then continued walking away from the people and I was tailing him. I was watching his back down to his hand who was gripping on my wrist. 

Why do I need to end up bumping him many times today? Why do I have to witness every important fact about him and that's his kindness? He's a different type of guy everyone would adore. 

Because of these discoveries, I felt very proud of myself. Knowing I was admiring this kind of guy. I was liking the type of guy like him. 

We made it to the not-so-bright place. Only the parked cars filled the silent lot and we're both standing near a car. Probably Aspen's car he's talking about.

"Wait for a moment and I'll make it fast," he said and opened the car's backseat. I watched how his head leaned lower and it's so clear to see his jaw. It looked so hot. 

"O-Okay, I'll just... just look away and wait until you're done!" I told him, pointing at my back with a smile. What would I do other than that? Go inside his car and let him change freely? 

He smiled at me. "Your choice, you do."  He's about to roll his shirt up but I was so fast to turn around just to look away. Yes, it's me who's getting red due to these pepper cheeks again!

I was biting my lower lips and staring at the wide starry sky from above. A lot of things happened today. It felt like Mezakiel and I were having a great progress. Sooner, my conscience will already swallow me. I'll be hurting myself becaue of it too. 

"Are you very aware about my feelings for you?" I asked him out 

the blue. Not because we're out of any topic. 

Because I was curious, curious to his treatment.

"I do," he answered. It's very hard to endure this embarrassment.

"Then you're not comfortable when I'm around. Or are you?"

"Every time I recall the truth that you like me, I feel so uncomfortable," he responded. Okay, self. Endure what is true even though it stings you. 

"How uncomfortable? To the point that you're wishing to stay away just to find the spot that could make you fine?" I added. 

"Karin," he whispered. I didn't move. "There's no point of staying away from you. All I have to do is to not get bothered about what you feel for me." 

"What makes me uncomfortable is when I think of that thought. But there's this spot that could make me at least fine and easy and that's when I start talking to you." 

My shoulders jumped out of his reply. He kept on telling words that sounded like a lie. They sounded so fake but I could tell how honest he was to me, all the time. That he was not just flattering, there's a bunch of truthful feelings mixed.

And it felt very colorful, it sounded very relieving. It's very enough to flatter me. To cheer me up. 

"That couldn't happen so easily!" I chuckled. "We only started talking like this, today!" 

I imagined him shrugging when he scoffed. "Who could explain? Neither do I could hardly find the answer why. Why I felt so close to you easily. And that makes me comfortable." 

"I'm not saying this to flatter you just because I know that you like me. Or because I want you to fall for me deeply. My own self's will is to not stay away fron you as well. And I'm curious if you feel the same way. That maybez today was enough for us to feel and realize it."

Do I? What do I feel when he's around? I don't know. Just like his answer, I don't know why. I couldn't understand why we're feeling a closure we easily got. 

Despite having my feelings for him as the hindrance, we both couldn't tell why we're not feeling uneasy together. 

And it somehow hurts me. That maybe he'll just see me as a close friend no matter what happens. That I won't have any chance at all. That I'll remain a friend which is painful. 

It hurts to think of it. He must know how much I like him. 

I've heard him closing the car already so I turned around to face him. "Are you now done?" 

He didn't answer me yet what Aspen had done shocked me.

He rapidly pulled me from my hand. He didn't talk when I kept on calling his name to ask him but Aspen just pulled me all the way inside his car.

"W-Wait! What's the matter?!?" I asked loudly when I was sitting on the backseat. He only hushed and put his index finger on my lips. He suddenly drew himself near me and he almost hugged me. What's he doing! 

He turned off the light of the car?! 

"H-Hey?! Aspen?!" I called but he's just glaring outside. 

"Don't be loud and don't move too much. She'll see us both here." 

Who? You're being too close right now. You'll suffocate me with this position we're at! And who was this person we need to hide from?