Feeling Lonely

"Honey, wake up," a soft voice evoked Leah's deep sleep. Leah opened her heavy eyes, she sat up immediately when she found Jerome standing with a half bent over her face.

"What the hell are you doing ?!" Leah yelled in a slightly defensive tone. She pulled off the blanket and covered herself tightly. Jerome looked surprised, "I just wanted to wake you up, it's dinner time," replied Jerome in a slightly annoyed tone.

Leah stuttered, "Sorry, I'm not used to it. If you don't mind, you should start knocking on the door first before entering this room, I feel a little uncomfortable ..." Leah said frankly.

She did want to try to accept the facts of her marriage to Jerome, but everything needed a process. Leah had to digest it all slowly.

Jerome shrugged, "Well, if that's what you want. Okay, next time I'll knock on the door before I go into your room," Jerome said, his face grim. Leah felt a little guilty, "I'm sorry Jerome, I know this must be hard for you too," said her in a half-whispered voice.

Jerome smiled, "Don't worry we'll face this together, well okay then I'll wait for you at the dining table," Jerome's tone sounded softer than before. Leah nodded, she let out a loud sigh after Jerome came out of her room.

Leah lazily dragged her feet into the bathroom, she washed her face and brushed her teeth. Leah let her hair loose because she was lazy to style it. She had spent ten minutes searching for casual clothes in the closet but she couldn't find any. The contents of the wardrobe are filled with formal and semi-formal clothes, while the sleepwear row is only filled with a collection of lingeries. It wasn't Leah's taste!

After getting tired of choosing clothes, Leah finally chose a plain white dress. With a sense of uncertainty, Leah dragged her feet towards the dining room. She must immediately put together all the puzzles of her five-year life, otherwise, maybe she will live without knowing herself forever.

At the dining table, Jerome was waiting while enjoying a glass of wine. He smiled welcoming Leah, but his facial expression suddenly changed when he saw Leah's loose hair.

"Why? Is there something wrong?" asked Leah who was confused by the sudden change in Jerome's facial expression. Jerome smiled a little, "Usually you will tie your hair when you eat..." Jerome said, staring at Leah's loose hair.

"What? Ah I see," Leah held her hair in confusion. "Okay, I'll try to live my life like the current Leah," Leah said as she got up back to her room to get a hair tie.

Now that Leah's hair was tied up randomly, Jerome still stared at her as if something was wrong with her. "Why are you looking at me like that?" Leah asked uncomfortably, she put the soup spoon back on the table.

Jerome pointed at Leah's hair, "You might forget, but I am a little annoyed when I see such messy hair ties," Jerome said, from the look on his face Leah knew that Jerome was not kidding.

Jeez! Jerome the Perfectionist! Or maybe he has OCD? Leah was suspicious from the moment she walked into their room. Even the clothes, shoes, and bags in Leah's closet are sorted by color. After all, all the clothes were plain without a pattern, really not in Leah's taste!

"Sorry," said Leah, her hand moved to fix her hair. Jerome cleared his throat loudly, causing Leah to stop her move. She looked at Jerome with a face full of question marks. "Sorry Leah, but I can't see people touching hair at the dining table, you know your hair might fall on the food we are about to eat," Jerome said sounded polite and careful but was able to make Leah feel isolated.

Where exactly is Leah now? Is this the house he lived in before the accident? Is it true that Jerome was her husband? It seems impossible for a flexible person like Leah Abigail to marry a man like Jerome! Leah felt she didn't belong here... 

Leah got up from her seat, she returned to the room and put her hair in a neat ponytail. After that, she returned to sit in front of Jerome without saying anything. For the time being Leah would only observe Jerome's movements, it was too early to draw any conclusions. It could be that the 2021 version of Leah is very different from the old version of her. 

"Thanks for putting the ring back on your finger," said Jerome when he saw that Leah had worn back her wedding ring. Leah nodded with a faint smile, to be honest, she was starting to regret her decision. But there's no harm in trying.

"I can't find Jessica's number, do you have her number?" asked Leah, feeling the need to talk to her sister. Jerome shook his head, "The last number I called is no longer active, I'll try to find out later," replied Jerome, his voice was soft but Leah felt like there some distance between them.

"Umm my parents, where are they buried?" Leah's voice was hoarse. She felt suffocated every time she thought of her Mum and Dad. 

"Their bodies could not be found, I mean all the bodies of the passengers on the plane that day, even the black box could not be found either," Jerome replied, his tone similar to someone delivering news of a natural disaster. There was not much emotion and empathy there.

Leah swallowed her soup with difficulty, she had no appetite. Now she is completely alone. There is nothing Leah could rely on, not even her husband. 

"Is my relationship with Jessica all right?" asked Leah, she felt as if Jessica was intentionally moving away from her. Jerome sighed," Well, it's not exactly fine, but also not too bad, as far as I know, you guys rarely communicate..."

What? How could it be! Leah and Jessica have always been close since childhood, even after they grew up. Well at least until 2016. How could their relationship be that bad, yeah unless one of them broke it? Could it be that Leah was the one who broke it?

Jerome pulled the soup bowl in front of Leah and put down a plate of grilled salmon instead. "This is your favorite food," Jerome said with a smile as if he couldn't feel the slightest bit of anxiety that Leah felt.

"Thanks," Leah said softly, her hand moving to cut the salmon with the dinner knife. Suddenly she thought of something, "Umm do I have any best friends or close friends? Umm, maybe Suzy, Chloe, Caitlin, or Jason?" Leah tried to name her close friends one by one. There must be one of them who is still Leah's best friend.

Jerome raised his eyebrow, "I've never heard of those names you mentioned earlier," Jerome replied, frowning as if the names were strange to his ears. Leah felt like her bones were falling off one by one. For the first time in her life, she felt completely alone.

"Oh yeah, there is one friend who is quite close to you, her name is Amy. If you want I will invite her to come here as soon as possible," Jerome's words were like a spring amid thirst for Leah. Finally, there was someone else she could ask about her life besides Jerome. Someone named Adrian crossed Leah's mind, but somehow Leah felt guilty every time she thought of that man. She didn't know why...