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Chapter 25
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2021-09-10 00:28:23It's been a hard couple of days since Landon hasn't talked to me and Jayden is staying away. I'm unsure of what is happening, but I just let it go. I have been so consumed with Jayden that I forgot I'm about to become a mother.
My belly has been growing, I am starting to feel flutters in my stomach, I'm uncertain if that is the baby moving. I think that I have blocked out my pregnancy on purpose. Just because I'm scared and not sure how I'm going to do this. I know that I will find a way no matter what. I just wish I wasn't scared of what is coming.
I have been spending most of my time in my cabin just relaxing. Forgetting how good it feels. All of a sudden, I hear a knock at the door, uncertain who it is I grabbed my robe to put it on. I walk over to the door and I open it hoping that it is Jayden, but when I open the door to my disappointment it is not Jayden.
I put on a fake smile "hi how can I help you?"
"Hi my name is Jasmine I'm in the pack alpha La
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As I am waiting for Jasmine to come to train not sure when she is coming I don't leave not wanting to miss her. I hear a knock at the door. I rush to the door thinking it is her but when I open it, I notice it is Landon. I didn't invite him. I ask "what do you want?""May I come in please?"I don't want him to come in, I am pissed because of the way he treated me. "can't you tell me from where you're at?""Look, I just wanted to apologize for the way I treated you. It was uncalled-for. I was so full of rage and I took it out on you, I'm sorry."I want to believe him that he wouldn't try to do that again. It's not like I told him no or tryed to even stop,, but he treated me like a whore. I also don't want him to think that he affected me in any kind of way. I don't want to show him any kind of weakness. I am quite not sure how to respond to him."Look, Jayden has been asking for you, I have been trying to keep him away because of my own jealous reas
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As I approached his door I go to knock I become nervous I never was nervous before it's different now. I'm not afraid of Landon it's just I'm nervous because of what he has done to me. I should have stopped him but I allowed it. I'm not sure if I am going to be able to just forget about it. I want to pretend that it never happened.As the door opens I see that it is Jayden His eyes go bright once he realises it's me. I will say I like the excitement that I see in him When I approach him. To see how my appearance just gives him so such joy."Lilly you're here I've been waiting for you all day it seemed like forever I was starting to worry that you might not come.""Yes it is really me it did seem like forever I missed you so much. I would never not show up for you."As I scrunched down to his height I open my arms for a much needed hug as he runs in to my chest and my arms wrapped around him and I squeeze all I feel is comfort. Once our bodies connec
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As soon as I get out the door, I shift into my Wolf. As I hear Star howl I am so relieved she's happy. She takes off and we run as fast as we can loving the chilly breeze going through our Fur. I can tell that she enjoys it just as much as I do.I'm sorry Lily with everything that has happened I had to regain control. Finding out we are pregnant and everything that has happened with our mate. Especially the fact that we are about to be parents. I'm freaking out. I needed time to absorb all of it. I'm sorry I'd never left you. I was always there, just silent.It's OK Star. I'm just happy that you're back. We all need time to adjust to our new life that we are given. We are going to be parents and I know I am scared, and I guarantee that you are too. Everything has changed so fast but one thing that has not changed is we have each other forever.Lilly, I want us to find out what we are. I know that Dean was supposed to start training but why hasn't he.I do
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IVAN'S POVWhat have I done to my mate, I am a monster? I needed her to hate me, so it would be easier for me when I marry. Instead, I made it worse by hurting her. I will never be able to forgive myself for what I have done to her. I know that she pushed and pushed until I reacted. She just wouldn't stop. I wanted to make her pay for ruining everything. I could have controlled my wolf, but instead I wanted to hurt her. She felt pain, so I left him to take control and take what he wanted, knowing I wanted the same thing.I wanted to punish her for defining me. I'm so angry I never wanted her in the first place. Why did she have to come along? I lied to her, and I told her that she was my third mate, knowing I've never had a mate until now. I have given up all hope and then there she comes along, I hate her for it. I had a plan, and she ruined it.I can feel her pain because of what I have done, and it makes me feel even more rage. I want to apologize for what I
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LILLY'S POVI have been lost for words since I ran into Ivan. Surprised that he left me free, I still wonder for how long it will be for. Now that he knows I'm alive. I have to tell Landon everything, I can't put it off any longer he needs to know. I have never lied to him. He really has never asked about my past. I am just afraid. That he will make me leave.As I toss and turn in my bed, there's no use for sleep. I get up, head to the bathroom. I turn the water on for the shower, maybe this will relax me. I undress while the water is warming. I look at myself in the mirror with my growing belly. As I can feel her movement, I become grateful that I have her.Lost and thought, the mirror steams. I open the shower curtain and step in, letting the hot water pour over my body. I try just to relax, but my mind is everywhere. All I can remember is his touch that made my body crazy. I crave his touch, I don't know why, I wonder what is happening to me.Star is a
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I continue to walk up to Jayden to talk to him about last night, "Hey buddy, I'm sorry for just taking off."But when I speak, it's like I have no words. He acted like he didn't hear me and just walked to Landon. "Daddy, can we please go home now."?I'm confused as to why he is treating me like this. I have done nothing but be nice to him, but instead he is now acting like I don't exist. I want to chase after him. But I will not beg to be loved. As I held my tears back, Dean approached me. "Lilly, is there something that you need?""Why are you not helping me with my abilities? You said that you would begin my training, but you have done nothing?""I was waiting for you to become a member of the pack, so you would have a bond with a pack.""As you can tell, I'm not wanted here, to be honest, I'm not wanted anywhere.""Lilly, I wouldn't be so sure that you are not wanted here. I know that you are, and that you are even loved here.""La
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When I hear star's words, my heart aches knowing that something is happening. I stand up and fight through the pain and shift. I take off knowing that I need to find him, so I can help him. Knowing that he doesn't deserve it,, but my child deserves to have a father. I don't want him dead, he needs to survive.I can feel the pain worsen and ease up at the same time. Then I wonder if he is being tortured. Wondering if they are torturing him almost to death but not actually allowing him to die just being barely alive. Is that why I am feeling this pain what is happening. I'm running as fast as I can, trying to pick up his scent, hoping I won't be too late?He is an alpha, he is strong so why is he on the verge of dying. As I become closer, I'm surprised by what I see. I see Ivan tied to a tree, tears fill my eyes at the sight of his agony. I run up to the tree then touch him as his head comes up, he looks at me with black eyes full of anger. Once he realizes it's me, his
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IVAN'S POVAs I am leaving the woods from my encounter with Lily. I am in shock, wondering how the hell she survived that fall. All this time I was calling her weak, but I was so wrong. I hate myself even more now for treating her the way I did. Remembering When I touched her skin it felt like a delicate flower, so soft. I tried to snap out of my thoughts of thinking of her, it's distracting me as I am tripping over branches that are on the ground. Realizing that I have made the biggest mistake Underestimating my own mate.I shift into my wolf and take off to the pack house. I need a distraction. From thinking of her it's making me crazy and craving more of her, I want to respect her and let her be free. Even though I'm not going to be able to let her free for long. I am hoping now more than ever that Jenny finds a way out of this marriage.Not really sure how she is going to do it, but I'm looking forward to it. If she can get out of it, then I will be able to
Last Updated : 2021-09-10
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Six months have passed since we escaped hell. Life is finally beginning to feel normal. Which makes me feel terrified. I never wanted to leave Alaska where my family was from, where I was raised. But I knew I had no other choice. We had to escape to a place where wolves were almost seemed non-existing.I wanted to go back for Landon. I wanted to save him no matter the cost, if it was just me. I would have died for him, but knowing that it would have risked Jayden's life, I wasn't willing to do so. I hate that he's not here. I wanted to drop hints for him, so he would know where to go. But I knew that I couldn't risk anyone else figuring the clues out. I know that Jayden misses him. I miss him too.We figured out that other wolves didn't sense us. Usually, a wolf can tell when another person is a wolf, but because of Jayden and I having healing powers. We go unnoticeable. It makes it easy for us to live in a human world. We know that our old life will catch up with us eventually, but f
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As we make our way to the door to the podium, Mary stops us. I look at her with so much anger and disappointment, I tell her, “please let us go. I want to avoid hurting you, but I will do whatever is necessary to protect us.”“They threatened to kill all of us. I thought one life for hundreds would be acceptable. I'm so sorry.”“You tied him up to a bed.”“He wouldn't stop trying to escape. I had no other choice.”“That's the thing, Mary, you had a choice, but you made the wrong one.”I want to rip her head off, but before I have time to, I feel a little hand tugging on my side. “Lilly, I know grandma made a mistake, but she's not bad, she just made a bad choice.”He's so innocent. I feel so bad knowing what is going to have to be done, and he's so little. Can he bear it? Will he forgive me for what I'm going to have to do? I don't want to take the chance of us being captured. It's time to kill them all.“Jayden, some things are unforgiven when you do something so terrible.”“Lilly, j
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I refuse to lose any more people that I care about. If I can get Jayden and Landon out of here, then I won't have to worry about them. I will know that they are free. I may never see them again, but at least they will be able to live. They cannot stay here. I cannot have a distraction. I need my head clear. If I'm worried about them, that I won’t be capable of doing whatever is necessary.I didn't want to resort to violence. I didn't want to kill people, especially people of my own kind. I just don't know what other choice there is anymore. I just want all of this to end. I don't want to live a life running. I want to enjoy life and everything it has to offer. I know what I have to do, and it makes me sick, but I don't think there are any other options. I quickly snap out of my thoughts as I hear Sam's voice, “Lilly, I will not follow any of your demands. You will do what you're told, or I will kill Jayden.A fire lights up inside me as those words leave his mouth. Something happens
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I stand there in disbelief. No, this can't be right, he looks nothing like. Sam, how can it be him? Star said it was our mate. I thought me not feeling for him was because of the hate that is deep inside me for him. I thought it overpowered the bond and turned it into nothing. But I was wrong, I felt nothing because this is not my mate. How could I be so stupid?“Sam, what is going on? Why do you look like Ivan?”“Oh Lilly, how easy you are to fool. You're just like your mate.”I watch as he peels his face. It is so disgusting as He removes the skin piece by piece, I then begin to recognize that this is really Sam. Another person who has betrayed me, I know that I shouldn't be surprised, but I am. There's not a person who has not lied to me. It makes me angry and sad all at the same time.“Why would you do this, Sam? I thought you cared about me. I thought we were friends."?“Lilly, it's nothing personal, it's for power. They promised me to be the alpha of the wicked falls pack I've
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I get out of their grip and stumble to my feet. I grab a hold of them and throw them to the ground like they weigh nothing. As my hand gets tighter around their throat, I can hear them gasp. Questioning if I should even give them a breath to speak.I then ask, “who are you and what do you want?” As I slowly release their throat enough for them to speak.“Please don't hurt me. I'm only doing my job. I didn't realize who you were until I already grabbed you.”“Who are you?”“I'm one of the watch Warriors of the pack, my name is Tye.”“There has been so much activity in the past couple of days that I didn't think I'm sorry. I didn't want to take a chance to endanger the pack.”“What do you mean increased activity, why wasn't I informed?”“There have been wolves trying to come into the pack. We are not sure why some seem harmless, but others seem dangerous. With all that has happened, we have not been allowing newcomers to join.”As I listen to him, I become irritated. I am the alpha. I s
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I've been watching Mary, but she doesn't seem to mind she goes on about her business like nothing is happening I know her secret I'm just waiting for the perfect moment to strike Landon is getting well, and he will soon be back on his feet and he will want to leave to continue the search for Jayden. I wanted to take this chance to find Jayden, but I haven't gotten any farther than what I was. I want to tell Landon because maybe he will know of some hiding spots that Mary might have used. If anyone knows her, it would be Landon that knows her best. I think my biggest issue is I don't know how to tell Landon. I don't want to be the person who breaks his world. I don't want him to have to lose someone else he cares about. But I'm at the point now where I'm not sure if I have another option. I try so hard to stop thinking about everything, but I can't. All I really want to do is sleep, but I can't. My head is spinning. With all that has been happening, figuri
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It has been almost a week since Landon has been home. He has been sleeping most of the time. His body is attempting to catch up on everything that it has lost. I've been working with Mary and I don't want to do what she wants me to do. She wants me to confirm Ivan as my mate and make him my second in command.I've been trying to put it off, but I'm not sure if I can any longer. I haven't even spoken to Ivan since that night. With Landon coming home, I've only been focusing on him. I haven't gotten very far figuring out about Jayden. I want to follow Mary. But every time she leaves, I can not pick up her scent to follow her. It frustrates me so much, but I try to hide it as best as I can.As I am getting ready for the day I am nervous that today is going to be the day when Mary makes me make everything official with Ivan. I've been putting it off, and I know that she is not going to let me put it off for very much longer. Not sure what my excuse is going to be this time
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He pushes me inside his grip, making me feel uneasy. Everyone's staring, wondering what my move will be, but I do nothing. I let him push me to the bedroom, not knowing what he's about to say. I'm nervous. It has been almost a month since I have seen him last. I watch, I'm waiting to see his lips move, wanting to hear what he has to say. “Lilly, I have looked everywhere for him. I can't find him. He is gone.” I watch as he falls to his knees crying in despair, my heartbreaking for him. And my body builds up with anger, knowing that his mother is making him feel this way. I ran over to him and let him sob in my arms. Not knowing what to say, I know that I can't tell him what I know. If he found out that his mother had been behind all this, I'm not sure what he would do. “Landon, I'm so sorry that all this had to happen to you. I wish I could take away all your pain.” I feel bad for Landon, but I will not jeopardize saving Jayden just to make him fe
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My senses have improved dramatically, but something else that I have noticed is my anger. I feel my blood boiling inside me. Trying so hard to control it, I don't want to blow my cover. I don't want Mary to know what I know. If she gets any idea that I am up to something, my plan could go very wrong. So wrong that I actually might kill her.She thinks the first move should be me naming my mate as my 2nd in command. Usually, packs have male alpha's and the females are their Luna. In this case, it's very much different, since the female is the alpha. I want to avoid making it official with Ivan. I don't love him. I'm aware that I should since he is my mate, and I'm met to be with him, but I feel nothing.I was always told once you find your mate that the bond is unbreakable. But the bond that I have is nothing. When I look at him, all
