Karan
"Heck! What the heck are you doing here?", I blurt out in anger as soon as I discovered Divya in bridal attire. I can't believe that she is sitting on my bed in red bridal attire. Moreover, she is my wife. Is this happening to me? Nothing can't be worse than this that I'm married to her. I walked away from the bed, frustration clearly visible on my face.
"What do you mean by that, Karan? I'm your wife. Am I not supposed be in your room?", she spits, sitting on the bed. My blood boils in anger, hearing her nonsense.
"Just shut up", I scream. "Don't act like you didn't know anything?"
"Karan, please don't yell like this. There's everyone around here", she says.
"Let them hear. Let them hear that I was tricked. I was cheated on", I shrug, throwing my hands on the air.
"So you are the one to get cheated on?", she questions as I turn to her. I don't have any answer to her question.
"Leave that", she says as she climbs down from the bed and walks towards me. I lift my eyes to look at her unwillingly. She had worn an elegant red lehenga with heavy gold jewellery. Her skin tone perfectly matched with the attire.
I couldn't look at her properly as I was pissed at the wedding ceremony. A week ago, my dad told me that he is looking for a girl regarding my marriage. And he came across a suitor through a matchmaker and wanted me to meet her. I was neither interested to get married nor to know about the girl who was going to be my wife. I declined the proposal of meeting her, telling my dad that his choice would be the best for me, though it wasn't the actual reason. Finally, today at the wedding ceremony, I saw my to be wife for the first time. And heck! She turned out to be Divya, my ex-girlfriend.
"Leave? What do you mean by that, Divya? How can I leave it so easily? Didn't you tell me that you're going away from my life for good? Then what the fuck made you come into my life again?", I can hardly control my anger. Despite being nervous, she smiles. That moment, I found her smile to be the most annoying thing in the world. Was I cracking a joke?
"Don't forget Karan, the alliance came from your family to me. I had just accepted", she blurted out, adjusting her heavy dress with both hands.
"And why the fuck did you do that? Didn't you know it was me? Then why did you accept the proposal?", I yell at her, failing to control over myself.
"I can ask you the same question, Karan. Why didn't you reject?", she asks.
"Because I didn't know it was you", I drove my eyes away from her. I didn't want to see her face as it was freaking me out.
"Really? Why didn't you try to know who was going to marry you? It was my decision, Karan. You can't question me. It's my life and I have the right to make my decisions. I wanted to marry you. So I did. You should've rejected me as you would be having a problem. As simple as that", she utters. This girl is still the same. She couldn't utter something good except for bullshit. I'm tired of her nonsense.
"Oh! I forgot how much shameless you are! If you had some self-respect left, you would've never done that. This is what you want right? Revenge?", I spit.
"Revenge? Really, Karan? You think I got married to you just to take bizarre revenge?", she blurted as if she didn't know anything.
"Yes, revenge"
"Overthinking! You still have this habit?", she chuckled, I could figure out from her voice.
"Don't. Don't try to fool me", I turned back as our eyes met. She looked into my eyes the way she used to do 4 years ago when we were dating. I used to hate it but she loved doing it. She used to look into my eyes for a long time and at last, I used to join her too. I had never asked her why she had been doing that. But today I feel like to know.
"I'm not fooling you, Karan", she said in a husky voice, still smiling at me. "I used to love you truly. After the dirty breakup, I could never love anyone more than you", she expressed. I glanced at her in disbelief. Is she still glued to the past? Didn't she move on ever? Am I the only man in her life? Those questions crammed my brain.
"I know I may sound dumb. But when the matchmaker came to my house to talk to my bua (parental aunt) I felt a new hope taking birth inside me. I thought maybe it was in our destiny to be together. That's why God had sent that matchmaker to my house with your alliance. I couldn't say 'NO' I had the last opportunity which I didn't want to lose", she says, lowering her eyes. I felt her words pinching to my heart. I never knew this girl loved me so much. Five years have passed, she is still the same, still loving me the way she used to do. But I couldn't love her and I can't love her.
"When your family approved it, I thought you too wanted the same, that's why you said YES", she mutters in a heavy voice.
"If I knew, I would say NO", I tell her, being as much rude as I can. She lowers her head. I know my words had hurt her terribly, I used to do the same in the college whenever we got into a fight. But I didn't know that my words still affect her like before.
"But we can't do anything right now", she didn't look at me again but my eyes didn't move away from her. "I want to give our marriage a chance"
"You know that's not possible", I barked, walking towards my bed. I was not sure whether I could spend my whole life with her or not. Even I wasn't interested in getting married too. It freaked me more when I discovered her next to me at the wedding itself.
I started removing all the crap rose petals from the bed. She was quietly watching me, expecting me to say something. But I don't try to say anything to her and walked to my closet, pull out my t-shirt and trouser and walked into the washroom.
I turned on the shower and closed my eyes to wash off all the frustration from my head. 5 hours ago, I didn't even know which turn my life was going to take. Having Divya as my wife was not less than a nightmare. I couldn't stand that girl but I also knew she did nothing wrong to be hated by me. Still, I hate her. The cold water splashes on my body, giving me goosebumps. It took me back to the times when we were in college.
Flashback
5 years ago
"How about Usha?", Ramit snapped, taking a sip from his cola
"Fuck off. I hate that girl", I threw a blank look while my eyes were roaming around the canteen.
"Kia?", Parthiv came with another option.
"No ways. I wonder how many guys have already fucked her. I want some decent kind of girl", I giggle.
I, Parthiv and Ramit was passing the leisure time at college canteen while discussing who I should date. The second semester had started and I was still a single af. I had started dating my early teenage. However, after joining the college one year had passed I couldn't make a girlfriend which was freaking me out.
"Karan", a sweet-sharp voice hit my ears as I turned around. It was Divya. She smiled at me while waving from 2 feet away.
I noticed her well. She had worn a pink Kurti with white palazzo, keeping her spectacles on. Her hairs were braided like every day. For a while, I kept looking at her in another way. She walked towards me as I stood up.
"Your Economics notes. Thanks for sharing", she smiled.
"That's nothing. You've always helped me. I can do it at least", I chuckled.
She passed me another casual smile and turned to go.
"Divya", I stopped her as she turned back to me.
"Yes"
"Will you be my friend?", I proceeded my hand towards her.
KaranHer eyes moved from my eyes to my hand. She hesitated to shake hands with me. Divya was one of those girls in our college who was naive, shy and decent, every quality I wanted in a girl. Though most of my girlfriends were fucking bitches, that time I wanted to date someone for whom I would be the first guy she would fall in love with. I didn't wait long to offer her for friendship. "Yes or no?", I asked her as she was taking time to shake hands. "I'm already your friend, no?", she mumbled. "I don't wanna be a formal friend", I told her. "Now what's a formal friend?", she rolled her eyes. Some of her behaviours used to piss me off. I wondered how a girl could be so dumb. She thought we were friends. "This is called a formal friend
KaranEarly in the morning, the alarm clock rings. I struggle to open my eyes and rub my hands against them. Moving my hand forward I turn it off, half opening my eyes. I feel something on my body and immediately look behind, discovering Divya as she is hugging me from behind. I try to move her, part her away from me but my subconscious isn't ready to do that. How can a man on the earth resist a woman from being close to him? Her grip is tight enough, I can't drive her away as it can wake her up. Instead of doing that, I stare at her. Despite washing her face last night, her face has light spots of makeup which unnaturally looks good. My eyes move to her hand which was around my torso.I hear a tap on the door and come out of my thoughts. "Karan!", my mom knocks at the door. Divya moves a bit as the knock wakes her
KaranI walk out of the room and slam the door on her face. I mean the same what I told her. It's impossible for me to get back to her, in fact to anyone. She'll have to understand that I'm not the kind of person who will be compromising his whole life for the sake of family and society. I reach downstairs. We still have a bunch of relatives at my place that I can hardly find the door. "Karan!", dad stops me when I cross the hall. "Where are you going?" "Office, dad", I tell him. "Office!", mom exclaims as she joins dad for tea. "You're going to the office today?" "Yes, mom. It's urgent", I tell her. "But you had taken a leave of 7 days, no?", dad asks. "It's something urgent. I need to attend", I lie. I don't want to b
KaranI had gotten more than 20 calls from mom. She was asking me to come back soon as everyone had their dinner but Divya is waiting for me. I didn't show any interest. In fact, I don't care if she's eating or not. I haven't told her to starve. Moreover, why can't Indian women have their dinner without their husbands? Is it because they actually care for their husbands or just to abide by a rule?Well, whatever it is I'm not gonna get trapped by her. If she's thinking by doing all this she can change my decision then it's completely her misconception and I can't help it.I look at the clock. It's near 10 pm. I guess now I can move to home. I'm feeling very exhausted and I badly need to sleep. But before that, I should have my dinner somewhere. I'm not gonna eat with her alone. It will freak me out.
KaranFlashback continuesThe sun shone brighter in summer days. Her face shimmered as the sun rays hit her skin. She had flawless golden skin which looked more attractive in sunshine. We walked inside the building and reached our classroom. "Hey, Karan! What a surprise!", Mitali reacted as she found me early in the class. "Trying to be early", I grinned, looking at Divya who sat on the same seat like every day. She opened her book and turned pages, lifting her spectacle from her nose bone with her index finger. I realized I was noticing her more carefully from yesterday.There's a fact that when you target someone to impress you automatically start noticing them more.
Karan "Divya, it's not the time to discuss all this", I finish wrapping the bandage and sigh. "Then when are we going to talk?", she wipes her tears and looks at me. Her eyes immediately get ruddy because of crying. "There's nothing to talk about. I'm just not ready to accept this marriage", driving my eyes away I push the plate towards her. "Finish your dinner now" "Then I'm ready to give us some time", she urges, looking at me, ignoring my last sentence. I don't look at her anymore since I know I know if I see her crying and suffering like this, I'll feel more guilty. "Say something", she touches my cheek. Her soft warm palm feels so cosy at this time when I'm exhausted. I wanted to tell her t
KaranI feel something heavy on my heart as I recall Meera. Neither I know where she is now nor I know why she left me like this. It's been 6 months she didn't show up. I tried to find her in almost every possible places. But she was gone. I had imagined my whole life with her. A guy like me completely changed himself only for her. I became serious in studies and my career just to secure the future with her. I never knew she would ditch me like this. I had never expected this from the girl I loved the most in the world.I'm not sure when I started crying. As soon as a teardrop falls on my hand I realize that I was weeping. This happens almost every night. I dream of her and wake up with her voice. I can't sleep the whole night, thinking about her. Though nowadays I'm handling myself well, this marriage again cracked me up. When I was struggling to get over my recent
KaranShe tightens her grip around my torso. I can sense her calming down. She has stopped sobbing, resting herself in my arms as if she waited for this for a long time. Somewhere in mind, I also felt better after permitting her to come close to me. I wonder if it's the allowance for moving into a new life with her or just sympathy for her which I felt after witnessing her crying like this. "I love you, Karan", she moans into my arms, clasping my t-shirt tightly. I wish I could say that back to her. Every girl deserves to hear those three magical words from her husband. Yet, we don't count among those couples. "It's too late, let's go to bed", I suggest her, lightly caressing her hairs. Her hairs feel smoother and silkier than before.
KaranIt has been 2 hours Divya left for her aunt's home. Mom said she will be back in two days. My leave will also end after 2 days. I have no other work except for sitting idle at home and watching a new web series. However, I'm not feeling like watching one.I'm strolling at our garden as it was feeling cold inside the room. Winter is almost here. I'm enjoying the light sun rays which are warming me at the same time reminding me of the golden complexion of Divya. It seems so weird that I'm thinking about her continuously for the last four days. No matter how much negative or positive my thoughts are, she is always there.Meanwhile, my chain of thoughts breaks with a call. I pick out my cellphone from my pocket and receive it.
KaranShe tightens her grip around my torso. I can sense her calming down. She has stopped sobbing, resting herself in my arms as if she waited for this for a long time. Somewhere in mind, I also felt better after permitting her to come close to me. I wonder if it's the allowance for moving into a new life with her or just sympathy for her which I felt after witnessing her crying like this. "I love you, Karan", she moans into my arms, clasping my t-shirt tightly. I wish I could say that back to her. Every girl deserves to hear those three magical words from her husband. Yet, we don't count among those couples. "It's too late, let's go to bed", I suggest her, lightly caressing her hairs. Her hairs feel smoother and silkier than before.
KaranI feel something heavy on my heart as I recall Meera. Neither I know where she is now nor I know why she left me like this. It's been 6 months she didn't show up. I tried to find her in almost every possible places. But she was gone. I had imagined my whole life with her. A guy like me completely changed himself only for her. I became serious in studies and my career just to secure the future with her. I never knew she would ditch me like this. I had never expected this from the girl I loved the most in the world.I'm not sure when I started crying. As soon as a teardrop falls on my hand I realize that I was weeping. This happens almost every night. I dream of her and wake up with her voice. I can't sleep the whole night, thinking about her. Though nowadays I'm handling myself well, this marriage again cracked me up. When I was struggling to get over my recent
Karan "Divya, it's not the time to discuss all this", I finish wrapping the bandage and sigh. "Then when are we going to talk?", she wipes her tears and looks at me. Her eyes immediately get ruddy because of crying. "There's nothing to talk about. I'm just not ready to accept this marriage", driving my eyes away I push the plate towards her. "Finish your dinner now" "Then I'm ready to give us some time", she urges, looking at me, ignoring my last sentence. I don't look at her anymore since I know I know if I see her crying and suffering like this, I'll feel more guilty. "Say something", she touches my cheek. Her soft warm palm feels so cosy at this time when I'm exhausted. I wanted to tell her t
KaranFlashback continuesThe sun shone brighter in summer days. Her face shimmered as the sun rays hit her skin. She had flawless golden skin which looked more attractive in sunshine. We walked inside the building and reached our classroom. "Hey, Karan! What a surprise!", Mitali reacted as she found me early in the class. "Trying to be early", I grinned, looking at Divya who sat on the same seat like every day. She opened her book and turned pages, lifting her spectacle from her nose bone with her index finger. I realized I was noticing her more carefully from yesterday.There's a fact that when you target someone to impress you automatically start noticing them more.
KaranI had gotten more than 20 calls from mom. She was asking me to come back soon as everyone had their dinner but Divya is waiting for me. I didn't show any interest. In fact, I don't care if she's eating or not. I haven't told her to starve. Moreover, why can't Indian women have their dinner without their husbands? Is it because they actually care for their husbands or just to abide by a rule?Well, whatever it is I'm not gonna get trapped by her. If she's thinking by doing all this she can change my decision then it's completely her misconception and I can't help it.I look at the clock. It's near 10 pm. I guess now I can move to home. I'm feeling very exhausted and I badly need to sleep. But before that, I should have my dinner somewhere. I'm not gonna eat with her alone. It will freak me out.
KaranI walk out of the room and slam the door on her face. I mean the same what I told her. It's impossible for me to get back to her, in fact to anyone. She'll have to understand that I'm not the kind of person who will be compromising his whole life for the sake of family and society. I reach downstairs. We still have a bunch of relatives at my place that I can hardly find the door. "Karan!", dad stops me when I cross the hall. "Where are you going?" "Office, dad", I tell him. "Office!", mom exclaims as she joins dad for tea. "You're going to the office today?" "Yes, mom. It's urgent", I tell her. "But you had taken a leave of 7 days, no?", dad asks. "It's something urgent. I need to attend", I lie. I don't want to b
KaranEarly in the morning, the alarm clock rings. I struggle to open my eyes and rub my hands against them. Moving my hand forward I turn it off, half opening my eyes. I feel something on my body and immediately look behind, discovering Divya as she is hugging me from behind. I try to move her, part her away from me but my subconscious isn't ready to do that. How can a man on the earth resist a woman from being close to him? Her grip is tight enough, I can't drive her away as it can wake her up. Instead of doing that, I stare at her. Despite washing her face last night, her face has light spots of makeup which unnaturally looks good. My eyes move to her hand which was around my torso.I hear a tap on the door and come out of my thoughts. "Karan!", my mom knocks at the door. Divya moves a bit as the knock wakes her
KaranHer eyes moved from my eyes to my hand. She hesitated to shake hands with me. Divya was one of those girls in our college who was naive, shy and decent, every quality I wanted in a girl. Though most of my girlfriends were fucking bitches, that time I wanted to date someone for whom I would be the first guy she would fall in love with. I didn't wait long to offer her for friendship. "Yes or no?", I asked her as she was taking time to shake hands. "I'm already your friend, no?", she mumbled. "I don't wanna be a formal friend", I told her. "Now what's a formal friend?", she rolled her eyes. Some of her behaviours used to piss me off. I wondered how a girl could be so dumb. She thought we were friends. "This is called a formal friend