Chapter 07

Febuary comes with it's amusingly jumpy weather. And in Stonebay, this means it gets unexpectantly rainy, only to flip to sunny and even windy inbetween, too. With the vibes of New Year have pretty much faded, most of them upbeat mood-ers charge out to find new things to do. Whether it's finding somebody or something to cling to, or just setting out to actually start knocking the goals of their New Year's Resolutions. There's gotta always be a thing going on! While in my case, it's usually a watchful countdown. When might a terrible problem hits? Or, if this year is gonna take it easy on us. 

I admit that sometimes I feel envious of how these happy people who see a new year as a revenue for more happiness. An opportunity for them to get the things they didn't in the previous year. But hey, it's not like they were merely blessed and I'm not! These people just happened to be working their ass off to get what they want, while I don't. But that's because I'm basically cursed! I could even write that on my resume, one of those days.

All these thoughts were always spinning in my head whenever I sit alone between classes with nothing to keep my humming mind occupied. So, today for instance, I'm having my lunch in class as it's pouring outside. I'm munching on a sausage roll, and washing it down with some orange juice I brought from home in a small container, originally used for coffee. But just like my stomach, my brain needs to be replenished as well. For this reason, I always bring a light novel or manga along to read.

Since we still have one more lecture before we change classrooms, most of the students are still minglling around, and it's just loud. Damn, I should've brought my earphones today! But, it's a 'too little too late' as one would say. 

Among the noise of people talking and laughing all around me, my ears catch the sound of none other than Courtney Meyers and her gang, the Stuck Up Kids. They were six: three girls and three guys, including Zoe Howell.

“Man, I don’t think I can make it today. I’ve got club and stuff.”

that's Noah Thomson, the dreamy pretty-boy.

“C’mon, you can skip one day, right? There’s, like, a two-scoop sale today at Thirteen and One Flavors. I want a chocolate and cocoa double scoop.”

“Both of those are chocolate...haha!”

“Huh? They’re totally different! And I’m, like, so hungry.” that loud voice belongs to Noah’s other half, Courtney. Her blonde hair is arranged in ringlet curls, and her top was deliberately pulled down to show so much shoulder.

What are you, a samurai-era prostitute?!

Her skirt was so short you got to wonder what was the point of wearing it at all. Courtney had a pretty and shapely face, but she dressed so slutty and acted so stupid, I'm not fond of her. Actually, I've been always genuinely scared of her. I felt like anything could come out of her mouth.

But Noah apparently doesn’t see her as someone fearsome. Rather, from what I could tell, he regards her as a friend who was as outgoing and affable as he is. This is exactly why I don’t understand the guys on the upper rungs of the food chain. No matter how you look at it, she only acts that way because she's hanging out with him. In my presence, she would have killed me with a single snort. Well, there's no reason for her to associate with me, so she’d never talk to me, anyway, and I'm fine with that.

“Sorry, not today,” Noah turns her down, taking control of the conversation again, while Courtney stares at him, nonplussed. “We’re serious about going to Nationals this year.”

“Bwa-ha…” an involuntary chuckle wells up in my throat. Oh man, he has this look on his face like 'I am so cool for saying that!' 

It was so bad. The worst. Such Inexcusable bullshit!

“Plus, Courtney…if you eat too much, you’ll regret it.” he giggles it out.

“I don’t get fat, no matter how much I eat. Aw, there’s just nothing to do today but eat! Right, Zo?”

“Yeah, it’s true, it’s true. You’ve got a great figure, Cortty. But I’ve got some plans today, so…” Zoe replies.

“I know, right? There’s just nothing to do but stuff our faces!” Courtney says,

and everyone laughs as if they’d been ordered to. It's just like the kind of  hollow laughter you hear on a sitcom laugh track. It was awfully loud, as if they’d just been cued to [laugh here] by the teleprompter.

I wasn’t really trying to eavesdrop on their conversation. They were just so loud, I couldn’t help but overhear. 

Actually, both nerds and normies tend to get loud when they’re gathered in a group. There was no one near where I'm seated, enthroned in the center of the room, but everything around me is a total commotion; as though I'm in the eye of a hurricane.

As I finish my meal, a fragile tinggly finger pokes my shoulder from one side.

“Huh? Oh, Zoe.”

She decides to disturb my peace. Same old Zoe Howell: smells great, kinda ditzy, huge boobs.

I glimpse back towards her group of loud-mouths as they're still chattering there for a second.

“Hmph. Fun times with your in-crowd, I guess.” I tell her.

“Why d’you have to act like that? You hate that stuff?”

“Of course I hate stuff like in-crowds and in-jokes. Oh, I like in-fighting, though. 'Cause I’m never part of 'em.”

“That’s a sad reason, and you’re a terrible person.”

Leave me alone...

Zoe smiles. The expression on her face is different from the one she had when she was

with Courtney and her friends. “Listen to this!” she says.

“What’s up?”

“I think…I’ve got it perfectly memorized.”

Her tone turns serious, almost grave. No doubt she's talking about the assignment I’d given her: memorizing all the moves for a Battle Royale match.

“Oh wow, seriously?”

“Seriously!”

“In that case, you really are gonna be able to play Anthony soon.”

“Really?! …Yay!” Zoe does a little ‘here we go!’ pose. Wow, that's cute. She's so sincere and in love. 

I can’t be entirely sure, but I think her makeup isn’t as heavy as before. She’s changed it to a more natural look. Or maybe she’d changed it at some other point before. Well, I never go staring at girls’ faces, so I don’t really know. I suppose this was proof that she has changed. A pretty small change, though. With nearly no makeup on, her eyes relaxed when she smiles, making her seem younger and more guileless.

"And, how's your side of things?" she asks me.

"Whattya mean by that. I've got no sides.." I reply dumbfoundedly.

“But you’ve got your own side, Miles. You always look like you’re having fun when you’re chatting with Charlotte at the club. Man, sometimes I feel like I can’t join in.” Zoe puffs out her cheeks, and rests her face on the desk as her eyes dart toward me questioningly. “I’d like to talk more and stuff… N—not in a weird way, though! I—I mean with Charlotte, too! You get that, right?!”

“Relax. I’m not gonna get the wrong idea about you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?!” she jerks her head up, huffing mad.

When I see her get ready for a punch, I thrust out a hand, trying to get her to calm down before I speak. “Well, Charlotte is different. She’s a force majeure.”

“She’s what?”

“Hmm? Oh, force majeure means ‘powers or circumstances that cannot be resisted with human ability.’ Sorry for using such difficult words.”

“That’s not what I meant! I understand what the words mean! And don’t treat me like I’m stupid!" Zoe chops me in the throat with her hand. It was a clean hit on my Adam’s apple, and I choke.

A faraway look clouded her eyes for second. “Hey, do you remember the day of the entrance ceremony in the Fall?” she asks me earnestly.  "It was a huge deal!"

“Huh? Khoff kha huff… What? Oh, I was in a traffic accident that day.”

“An accident…”

“Yeah. I was supposed to enroll at that semseter, but on the first day of school, I was walking there when some bridge collapsed. There was somebody crossing the road just before me, and was right about to be hit by a truck! I protected that person with my own body. I was so gallant and heroic and super-cool.” I guess I'm dramatizing it a bit, but apparently, nobody else knew about the incident anyway, nobody would care. More importantly, since nobody knew about it, nobody else was gonna bring it up, so I gotta make myself look good; while I'm still alive at least.. 

On hearing that, though, Zoe’s face twitched, and she stiffened.

“The—bridge…? Y-you don’t…know who, Miles?” she mumbles quietly; barely opening her mouth as she chewed on her words. 

Does she have a stomachache, or what?

“What’s wrong?”

“N-nothing… Anyway! You don’t remember that girl, right?!”

“I don’t remember… Huh? Did I say it was a girl?”

“Huh?! Uh…you did, you did! You totally said it! Actually, you said nothing but girls!”

“How creepy do you think I am?” I retort, and Zoe titters as if hiding something as she turns to look away. But at that moment, somebody approaches us.

A tall girl with a slender thin body. She got a very short golden hair that's lustring against the room's lights. She was wearing a black stripped white blouse, and square shorts. Her face looks so delicate, yet firm and calming at the same time. She has these vibes of some British royalty.

“Tiffany?! Wow, I didn’t see you, there! What's up! How's it goin'?”

Just as I'm wondering how a third classmate walks up to me, I realized it's 'cause Zoe, the social quick-change artist, is here.

“Good, Oh… I just wanted to give you the new handouts for tomorrow's class…”

“Everyone’s been talking about this in school lately! They think midterms are gonna be super hard this time."

“Yeah, exactly!” I say, but all I'm making are exaggerated gestures.

“Oh…yes… But, why…?”

“Why what?” Zoe asks, and I think she probably knew what Tiffany's trying to say, but she doesn’t let it show. 

Tiffany’s gaze shifts back and forth between us curiously, as if she was seeing a pair of fairies that no one else could. “…So you two are friends… That’s a surprise…”

“I know! We just got to know each other, recently.” Zoe answers right away. She sure is good at making people feel welcome.

“…Oh, that...is..cool..” she giggles. Her long eyelashes quiver bewitchingly. But the situation got awkward.

“Oh sorry! That one’s mine.” Zoe says, pointing to the pile of papers Tiffany's still holding.

“Oh right. Here you go… Well, enjoy yourselves…” 

With that graceful smile, she retreats into the forestlike ambiance of the classroom elegantly.

◢ ◣

After finishing Computer Programing class for the day, our class have to change rooms. Plus, there's a thirty-minutes break between that previous lecture, and the coming one. During this sweet interval, most people would go around to socialize with others, grab a bite, or even revise before class, like some elitest. To be honest, I'm not a huge advocate for finding joy in studying. Seriously! Nobody likes studying, unless you some kind of freak! Even on the basis of learning how to do your job better, experience is your best teacher. Anything else is threatened to be lost. Forgoten without a trace. That's why, I don't like to study so often. I like it loose but contained. The practicals are the stuff I usually focus on. Anything else, is merely just pure gag.

In my case, other than doing any of those things, I go hide in the library. But I'm not reading books (although I pretend to; so, I can still blend in). I come here to sit in peace, and brainstorm new strategies for a Role-playing game I'm playing these days called Persona 5. I haven't played any of the previous enteries before. So, I'm pretty much a noob to this series, but I'm thrilled by what I'm experiencing this recent days. I don't even get to think about killing myself as often! That's a reason to want to clear that game with 100% achievements! 

As I'm sitting my bony butt on the floor, leaning against one of the bookshelves, a shadow casts from above. When I look up to see whose that, my eyes catch a danggling ID card wirtten on it [Library Friends]. As my sight marches upward, a face comes to view.

“Miles.”

“Whoa?!”

I suddenly hear my name in a frighteningly clear voice. And there, holding a book in both hands and peering at my face, is an angel of light—er, Tiffany.

“…Oh, Tiffany, right..? What are you doing here?”

“Um, I’m always here…?”

“…Always?”

What did she mean? What is she talking about? 

A smell like a field of flowers in paradise is wafting from her and softly smothering my brain,  making it difficult to think.

“You know…it’s always just you and me in here when we have to change classes…” she says.

“Um…always?”

“Yes…I mean…you never noticed?”

So… 

“…Oh, you mean…”

“You’re always in here when we have to change classrooms, aren’t you…?”

“Yeah, yeah.” man, I'm totally flustered, right here!

“I always do the same thing, so I thought, Oh, there he is again…”

“Oh really? I’m sorry, I was probably distracted…” …thinking about strategies for Persona 5.

When I glance at Tiffany, I notice she's looking at the open book in my hands.

“…You like Alberto Moravia…?”

“Huh?”

“Huh…? Do you not? You’re always reading his books…”

Oh right, the book I'm pretending to read. I pretty much always sit in the same place at the library and take a book from the end of the nearest shelf, so it would always be the same one… But I have no idea if I should tell her that, so instead I go and say, “Oh yeah, right. I mean, he’s okay…”

What to do? Realizing I wouldn’t be able to survive this conversation without understanding the gist of the book, I glance down at its pages for the first time, only to find a string of words so undecipherable. A shallow dip into this book would get me nowhere, unfortunately.

“I thought so…!” Tiffany’s eyes always have that magic sparkle to them, but now they were glittering especially bright. “I love Morvia’s books, too…!”

“Oh, y—you do?” crap, what do I do now?! “Wh—what a coincidence…”

“I know, it’s amazing!” Tiffany brings her hands together softly in front of her mouth. “It’s just like The Poppols and Raptor Island, isn’t it?”

“Uh, The Poppols…?”

“You know, Morvia’s book…oh, you haven’t read it yet…? Makes sense, they don’t have it at the library…”

“Huh? …Oh, right! Um, I mean, I really want to, but it’s hard, you know, to…” I stutter, trying to fudge my way through. 

Tiffany’s eyes sparkle brighter, like Spirit Droplet had doubled their magical powers or something.

“Right! It’s so hard to find that one!”

“Yeah..?”

“That book hasn’t been reprinted since it was translated twenty years ago, so not many places have it. You’d think they would, considering it’s one of his most important books…! I wish it was easier to find!”

She even latches onto the fact that I hadn’t read it yet, wiping out my last escape route.

“Huh? Oh, right, yeah! I totally agree, ha-ha…”

"So, you enjoy your time here, right?" she asks happily.

"Well, sure, yeah." I answer right away. "This is my 'go to' place to get some clarity in this school, honestly.."

“Uh, um…” Tiffany begins, apparently mustering her resolve. “I’m sure…I’m sure I can tell you!” she whispers, like she was persuading herself of something.

Oh…uh-oh. I suspect she is about to reveal an important secret. I mean, that was definitely what would happen if this was a light novel or a porn game. I definitely sense a flag, but in this case, it's connected to our relationship as Morvia-whatever reading buddies. Meaning I’d better stop her now…but by the time that thought enters my head, Tiffany's already continuing. “Actually, I’m…having a trouble.." 

"Huh..?" 

She tucks her hanging ID as she speaks, "You know, this library is going to be closed soon."

"That's what's troubling you?" I ask.

"Yes, the Student Council has been getting a lot of complaints about how this library have become a messy spot.." Tiffany explains. "People only come here to hide between the shelves, and smoke, or drink, or even kiss and do PDA! They're disrespecting this place's sacracy!"

Seeing her delicate white skin flushes in frustration, all I could do is nod. "That's unacceptable."

"Yeah. So, when the librarian, Ms. Erika, assigned the Library Friends to help her put things straight," Tiffany's shoulders jerk. "Some of us—have snapped pictures, catching people right-handed, and then—they sent them to the Student Council.."

Oh, this is bad! If what's she saying actually happened, tons of students would be in trouble. Not to mention what would other students think of the library. It's for this reason, the council won't hesitate to inform the Faculty Board.

"You think the Faculty Board might—" I try to make sure, but Tiffany interjects.

"They've already done it!" she utters. "The Board are going to issue an order to close this library, for good.."

"Ohhh. I'm sorry.." I reply.

"The board said, that they will inspect the place next week, and then decide. So, I've been thinking if you——if you help me out....to restore order here. Would you?" Tiffany lowers her head and stares back at me. The mental attack comes from an unexpected angle, made especially  powerful by a pair of eyes misty with the morning fog around a sacred tree.

“Uh… I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked… It was such a sudden request… Sorry to bother you…”

“No, not at all! It—it’s no problem at all! I’d be happy to, very happy! That is, if you think I’m qualified!” my mouth just moves on it's own will. As though, I've lost control upon myself due to some magic spell.

"Yes. If you joined the Library Friends, we will be working together, a—and that will help me get motivated to pull the library together, again..!" Tiffany's responds with a cherry-red face.

So, she wants me to join this group of library monitors who enjoy reading books and shushing people speaking loudly. Well, it ain't a bad gig! I mean, I come here frequently, and I have no other obligations—wait a minute! 

A chill travels down my spine when the Aid-Club pops into my brain. Damn, that place is haunting my soul! Even when I'm far away from it, it finds a way to ruin my life.

I sigh in despair, "..I think, I'm might not be able to join the group.." 

"Wh—what? Really? But, I thought, I could count on you.." Tiffany stands before me with her torso twisting left and right, making herself seem much cuter as she's glancing at me with pleading eyes. "Miles, we have an important common interest. We would connect even deeper than anybody else.."

No, no, no, no, no! This girl is an atomic bomb, I swear! If she keeps on playing like that, I'd end up falling for her. That's too much for me to handle.

"Well, sorry...I can't, really.." whoa, is it hot in here?! Am I hyperventilating?

“Oh...” she drones, sounding sincerely let down.

I search for the right words. “Well, how about this? I’ll think about a way to help you out.” not like I can do anything, though.

“Thanks. I feel a bit better just having talked to you about it.” she smiles at me, but I can tell she's merely trying to console herself. If she's just trying to make herself feel better, though, I think that's okay.

◢ ◣

“No.”

That's the first thing out of Charlotte’s mouth.

“No? Hey, come on–”

“No means no.” her second refusal is even colder.

This all started because I mentioned Tiffany’s problem to Charlotte. My actual plan is to steer the conversation in a convenient direction, smoothly quit the Aid-Club, and then put on a show of joining the Library Friends before slowly fading out, but she’d cut that option clean off for me.

“I think Tiffany has the right idea about me joining the library group, though. Basically, we just have to give the library a little jolt. I mean, if they get the bomb dropped on them that there’s a new member, that’ll mix things up, right?” I explain to her with a very sincere tone.

“Do you think you are capable of operating in a group? A creature such as yourself would never be accepted, am I wrong?”

“Ngh…”

She's right; I totally can’t. It is true that I’d probably quit.

Charlotte laughes in a way that's a lot like a sigh. “You have absolutely no understanding of group psychology, do you? You’re a master loner.”

“I don’t want to hear that from you.” I avert her cold gaze.

"In the end, It's not necessarily a good idea to help people with every little thing." Charlotte continues. "You know the old saying: A lion throws it's young off a cliff to kill it."

My face twitchs in response, "It's not supposed to kill the cub.." 

Charlotte turns away to gaze at the window, and I've got no other choice but to change my strategy.

"So, what would you do, then?" I ask her.

"Huh, me..?" she looks back at me. "I'd make that group rebuild that library brick for brick. They shall work on it until they die."

Oh my God, she's smiling..!

At that moment, the doors opens with a bang. 

"Hiiiiii!" Zoe Howell barges in like some traver. She's brimming with birdbrained, bimbo smiles, as usual, looking as if she had not a worry in the world. But behind her stands someone who looks timid and serious.

Her eyes are downcast, as if she lacks confidence. Her fingers weakly grasp the hem of Zoe’s blazer, and her skin is translucently white. She's such an ephemeral existence, it seems as though she would disappear like a fleeting dream if the light shines on her.

“Oh…Miles!” instantly, the color returns to her clear skin, and she smiles like a flower bursting into bloom. When she smiles, I finally realized who she is. Why does she looks so glum?

“Tiffany, huh.”

She steps delicately towards me, squeezing the cuff of my sleeve instead now. Hey, hey, you’re not allowed to do that!

“What’re you doing here?” her voice is so delicate, so soft.

“Well, this is my club… What are you doing here?” still not sure, but good heavens! Who cares?! This girl is fondling with my ugly heart. 

“Today I brought someone with a request, heh-heh,” Zoe

announces proudly, pointlessly puffing out her chest. 

I’m not asking you. I wanna hear the answer from Tiffany’s cute lips…

“Well, like, listen! I’m a member of the Aid-Club, too, aren’t I? So I thought I’d do my job for once. And Tiffany seemed to have a problem, so that’s why I brought her here.”

“Zoe.” Charlotte says.

“Charlotte, you don’t have to thank me, it's the kind of person I am.”

“You’re not actually a member, though.”

“I’m not?!” Zoe jumps out in a shock.

She’s not?! That's a surprise. I had thought for sure this was a thing where she just gradually ends up being in the club.

“No. I haven’t gotten an application form from you or consent from our supervisor, so you’re not a member.” Charlotte is pointlessly strict about these rules.

“I’ll fill one out! I can fill out as many applications as you want! Lemme join you!” with tear-filled eyes, Zoe began to write an application form on a sheet of loose-leaf paper in rounded, childish, posture on the ground. What is wrong with her?!

“So, Tiffany Clark, was it? What did you need?” ignoring Zoe scribbling away on her application form, Charlotte turns to Tiffany, with her head resting on her hand.

Pierced by her cold gaze, poor Tiffany twitches for a moment. “U-um…you can help me…re-invent…the library, right?” 

At first, she’s been looking at Ms. Prodgy, but as she gets towards the end of her sentence, Tiffany’s gaze shifts over to me. She's shorter than me, so she's looking up at me, seeing how I’d react.

Hey, don’t look at me like that… You’ll get me all worked up. Stop giving me that look!

Then, though it likely isn’t her intention to save me, Charlotte replies in my place. 

“I don’t know how Ms. Howell, here explained it to you, but the Aid-Club is not your personal Mr. Fix-it. We only provide a little assistance and encourage your independence. Whether you improve or not is up to you.”

“Oh… I see…” discouraged, Tiffany’s shoulders droops.

“Huh? What?” Zoe raises her head, as if she's heard something disappointing.

“Don’t give me that. Your irresponsible remarks have crushed this girl’s slim hopes to smithereens.” Charlotte attacks her mercilessly, but Zoe just tilts her head.

“Hmm? Hmm? But, like, you can figure something out, can't you?” Zoe asks bluntly, a completely blank expression on her face.

Depending on how you interprets that remark, it can mean something disparaging, like 'So you can’t do it?'

Unfortunately, there's someone in the very freakin' room who would take it (a little bit too seriously) like that..

When I look back at her, black flames were blazing around her like crazy! 

Uh—oh! Zoe's reckless words have turned the switch within Charlotte. And the monster of the apocalypse is unleashed.

"You've become a lot more forth-right, these days.." she snears out. "...To think you would try to test me..." 

A demon wrath of mass destruction is upon us! I gaze back at Zoe on the ground in disgust. Talk about irresponsibility..

"Fine. Ms. Clark, I'll accept your request." Charlotte declares.

"Haa! Tha—thank you!" and poor Taffiny smiles like an innocent baby 'cause that's exactly what she is; an innocent baby deer!

Well, I think a cold-blooded girl like this one declaring she’s going to help you would scare most people. At this rate, I wouldn’t have been surprised if she'd thrown something like: 'I'll solve your problem for you, but in exchange for your life!'

Are you some kind of witch or what?

I take a step forward in an attempt to protect Tiffany and ease her anxiety. When I draw near her, I smell shampoo and deodorant intermingled: the indescribable scent of a collage girl. This is way too much cuteness! Why a broken person like me got to meet a pure beauty like this girl?! My heart is skipping multiple beats. No one should be made like that, for God sake!

“Well, I don’t mind helping, but what are we going to do?” I cough it out, hesitantly. Trying my best to not lose my sanity.

“I just told you, didn’t I? Don’t you remember? If you have no confidence in your memory, I suggest you take notes.”

“Hey, you can’t mean you were serious…” my voice fades out as I finishes that sentence, remembering her something-something until you die remarks, and Charlotte smiles as if to say, 'Oh, you’re so insightful.' 

That smile is scaring me…

Tiffany’s white skin goes even paler, and she begins trembling like a leaf.

“A-am I going to die?” her lips shiver like a baby rabbit.

“It’s okay. I’ll protect you,” I reply, patting her on the shoulder.

Tiffany’s cheeks flush, and she gazes at me feverishly. “Miles…do you really mean that?”

Noooooooooooo! My heart is bleeding! I can't take that much cuteness! Why, God?! Why?!

I need to calm down, or I'll make a scene! Okay! Chill, Miles. Chiiiiillll..

“Oh, sorry. I just wanted to try saying that..” actually, that was one of the top three lines I’d wanted to try saying once, as a man. Stupid, I know..

By the way, number one is: 'You go on ahead. Leave this to me.'

There was no way I’d ever protect Charlotte from anything, though, or protect anyone at all, for that matter.

Tiffany let out a short sigh and pouted her lips. “I don’t understand you sometimes, Miles…but…”

“Hmm, you have to be at the library after school, right, Ms.Clark?” Charlotte cuts her off. “Then let’s do some construction work during lunch. Are you fine with meeting at the library?” 

She's briskly decided the arrangements for the next day.

“Roger!” Zoe replies as she finally finishing writing out her application form. Tiffany nods, too. And that means…

“You mean…me, too?” I say dumbfoundedly.

“Of course. You don’t have any plans during lunch, anyway, now, do you?”

Indeed I did not.