I felt comfortable. I knew my fate and yet I was surprisingly calm about it. Why struggle and worry your last few moments to live?
Just think about your life as though it was flashing before your very own eyes. Then I felt something or rather someone grab my shoulders.When I opened my eyes and blinked a few times, I saw it was Daniel. He was struggling under the pressure of the water as he tried grabbing my wrist. We struggled a little more climbing over the seats in the car.I tried fighting him, I was just extra weight to carry, but he didn't seem to care. I was becoming more and more unconscious by the minute.My eyes were hard to keep open in the water as I was being dragged to the back of the car.There was a small little crack in the back window as he tried to slam his foot against it, trying to break free.He was losing his breath quickly as he put as much force in the last kick. The window broke free and the pressure of the water came crashing in really fast, forcing us back a few seconds.He grabbed my hand and pushed me out of the car. In my opinion I thought we were hopeless, but he still had the faith that we could make it to the surface as our hands were tangled together.I was losing all will and I couldn't move anymore. He was trying to swim with me being dragged below him. He looked back down at me.Then suddenly I felt his hands on my waist as his lips crashed against my own passionately. Thereafter I felt him give me a giant push up as it caused him to fall down into the water.The second his hands left mine his eyes closed as he continued to fall further down as I was going up. I felt strong hands grabbing my shoulder and yanking me out of the water. By then I was barely breathing and soon blackness hit me again at full force and I welcomed the empty feeling.Eventually though, I felt like I was dead, or dreaming, but I'm pretty sure dead was the correct answer, because we were in the car again like nothing had happened. The truck that had originally hit us went right past us without a problem. Daniel grabbed my hand, interlaced our fingers together and then put them on his lap. I looked down at them and then back up at his face.Confusion didn't quite cover the way I was feeling. He gave me a small smile and squeezed, almost in a reassuring manner."Everything is going to be okay, I promise," he reassured. I heard someone faintly calling my name in the distance but I was trying not to pay attention to it. I wanted to be here at this moment."Why?" I questioned, confused. Why did he push me up and help me? Why would he do that to me, let me live this life without him?"You need to continue from here, you can't come with me. It wouldn't be right, you still have a whole life ahead of you and I wasn't going to let you waste it.""Wait, I don't understand. You also had a life, too."I heard my name being called again, but this time it seemed closer. I could feel myself starting to stress out, I wasn't ready to go back."I don't have much time... I just want you to know that I will always be here with you."I'll never leave your side, and help you wherever I can until you are ready to move on and will no longer need me... but try to remember that the accident isn't your fault," he squeezed my hands and brought it to his lips.His soft lips brushed against my hand as he looked up at me one last time. "I love you, Valerie, please don't ask why anymore..."He was slowly fading away as the man who was calling my name got louder. I heard a loud beeping noise and Daniel disappeared for good."Wait! Come back please! You said you wouldn't leave me!" I screamed trying to sit up properly. My vision was blurry but I could tell I was in an ambulance.The men who were next to me were struggling to get me back down. I wasn't having any of it. My mind was swarming with memories and my eyes were already starting to burn from exhaustion.I felt a sharp pinch in my skin as I looked down to see a needle being injected into my right arm. I felt weak again and slowly I laid back down again.The blackness came for me the third time but at that moment I wanted to bask in it forever because I didn't want to feel like I was alone."He's in the sun, the wind, the rain, and in the air in which you breatheHe sings a song of hope and cheer, there's no more pain, no more fearYou'll see him in the clouds abovehear him whisper words of loveYou'll be together before longUntil then listen to his song."Christy Ann Martine ~•~Awareness came in gradual stages. It began with a series of tiny explosions that went off behind my hazel-coloured eyes, intense detonations of pain that heralded my return to consciousness.With my eyes still closed I slowly registered the sounds surrounding me. The grating rasp of a respirator. The high-pitched blip of a heart monitor. My own blood rushing in my ears, obliterating every coherent thoughts, except for one. Pain.The mere act of parting my swollen lids was agony personified, and yet I tried anyway. Tears leaked from my eyes, bruising the corners with my effort, but yet I still persisted.I could feel the painful shift in my spine, the awful heaviness in my legs and the tingling
For a moment I wondered why she was acting weird, but my thoughts were interrupted when my father and Daniel's friend, Leander, walked in.Once I made eye contact with my father I noticed so many emotions all at once. Relief that I was alright, a deep sense of sadness over the accident, worry was clearly in front but anger was present as well."Valerie!" Thank the Lord you're okay!" My father said out loud as he rushed up to give me a hug. His eyes were bloodshot and his face was pink. His voice was strained and he looked beyond tired."And here I thought big men don't cry," I said jokingly. He looked embarrassed for a minute as he turned around to laugh with Leander."Hello, Val. I'm glad to see you still have your sense of humour," Leander said as he walked towards the window side of my bed. "Where's mother?" I asked, looking at the doorway."She's at home resting. For the past four days in a row, she wouldn't leave your bedside. "After we fought yesterday about her getting some r
I looked up to see Leander's face just inches from me. Regret was flooding through my body because I hadn't thought about how this would affect my parents. I was on my knees and he was on his, while looking at me.Before I gave it a thought I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him tightly. He put one of his hands on my back and the other behind my head, keeping me on his shoulder.He then started to rub circles on my back and run his fingers through my tangled messed up hair. "Don't ever do that again..." he said seriously."Your parents love you! People still care about you. I still care about you... and you can't just end your life like that, Valerie. Do you understand! "Didn't you see how happy your father was when he saw that you had awakened? Or the sad look your mother had when she tried but failed to calm you down when she came back and saw you in tears? Now picture them when you aren't here anymore, Val!"I sobbed into his neck as he continued to talk to me patiently. Was
"The reality is that you'll grieve forever.You'll not 'get over' the loss but learn to live with it, every single waking moment.You'll heal and rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered.You'll be whole again,but you will never be the same againNor should you be the same,nor would you want to beAnd that is the reality of true loss."Elizabeth Kubler-Ross and John Kessler▫️▫️▫️◽️◽️◻️◽️◽️▫️▫️▫️"It's just too hard and I just want to forget ever meeting you, but more importantly I wish I never wrote you into existence," I sighed and turned my back towards him, not wanting to see the sunken look his eyes would form from my words."Is that really how you feel, Val?" He asked, over the noise of the raindrops hitting my window.I did. It was the truth. He had ruined everything but I guess I was also at fault for allowing it to happen... for being weak and letting him in.My breath wavered. "If it prevented me from being lost and miserable without you. From ever having to suff
When someone dies, it's supposed to be sad but having to watch it all happen before your very own eyes is devastating. Out of everyone in both vehicles that night, I was the only survivor. The driver in the other vehicle, died at the wheel, paramedics said he had a heart attack. I saw the truck heading into our lane but by the time my mouth could formulate a response it was already too late.If I had said one word, or uttered anything about the truck, maybe Daniel would still be alive. The accident happened in slow motion. One moment we were laughing but then the next, my mind seemed to have stopped time.As the impact of the truck crashed into us, we slammed back way too fast and I felt the car start to fall off the ledge. I looked to my left at Daniel before the car fell off the bridge and saw blood dripping down his forehead just from the impact of the hit. "Daniel! Daniel!" I screamed, but it was hopeless and deep down I already knew that, I just didn't want to face the truth. I
I looked up to see Leander's face just inches from me. Regret was flooding through my body because I hadn't thought about how this would affect my parents. I was on my knees and he was on his, while looking at me.Before I gave it a thought I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him tightly. He put one of his hands on my back and the other behind my head, keeping me on his shoulder.He then started to rub circles on my back and run his fingers through my tangled messed up hair. "Don't ever do that again..." he said seriously."Your parents love you! People still care about you. I still care about you... and you can't just end your life like that, Valerie. Do you understand! "Didn't you see how happy your father was when he saw that you had awakened? Or the sad look your mother had when she tried but failed to calm you down when she came back and saw you in tears? Now picture them when you aren't here anymore, Val!"I sobbed into his neck as he continued to talk to me patiently. Was
For a moment I wondered why she was acting weird, but my thoughts were interrupted when my father and Daniel's friend, Leander, walked in.Once I made eye contact with my father I noticed so many emotions all at once. Relief that I was alright, a deep sense of sadness over the accident, worry was clearly in front but anger was present as well."Valerie!" Thank the Lord you're okay!" My father said out loud as he rushed up to give me a hug. His eyes were bloodshot and his face was pink. His voice was strained and he looked beyond tired."And here I thought big men don't cry," I said jokingly. He looked embarrassed for a minute as he turned around to laugh with Leander."Hello, Val. I'm glad to see you still have your sense of humour," Leander said as he walked towards the window side of my bed. "Where's mother?" I asked, looking at the doorway."She's at home resting. For the past four days in a row, she wouldn't leave your bedside. "After we fought yesterday about her getting some r
"He's in the sun, the wind, the rain, and in the air in which you breatheHe sings a song of hope and cheer, there's no more pain, no more fearYou'll see him in the clouds abovehear him whisper words of loveYou'll be together before longUntil then listen to his song."Christy Ann Martine ~•~Awareness came in gradual stages. It began with a series of tiny explosions that went off behind my hazel-coloured eyes, intense detonations of pain that heralded my return to consciousness.With my eyes still closed I slowly registered the sounds surrounding me. The grating rasp of a respirator. The high-pitched blip of a heart monitor. My own blood rushing in my ears, obliterating every coherent thoughts, except for one. Pain.The mere act of parting my swollen lids was agony personified, and yet I tried anyway. Tears leaked from my eyes, bruising the corners with my effort, but yet I still persisted.I could feel the painful shift in my spine, the awful heaviness in my legs and the tingling
I felt comfortable. I knew my fate and yet I was surprisingly calm about it. Why struggle and worry your last few moments to live? Just think about your life as though it was flashing before your very own eyes. Then I felt something or rather someone grab my shoulders.When I opened my eyes and blinked a few times, I saw it was Daniel. He was struggling under the pressure of the water as he tried grabbing my wrist. We struggled a little more climbing over the seats in the car.I tried fighting him, I was just extra weight to carry, but he didn't seem to care. I was becoming more and more unconscious by the minute.My eyes were hard to keep open in the water as I was being dragged to the back of the car.There was a small little crack in the back window as he tried to slam his foot against it, trying to break free. He was losing his breath quickly as he put as much force in the last kick. The window broke free and the pressure of the water came crashing in really fast, forcing us back
When someone dies, it's supposed to be sad but having to watch it all happen before your very own eyes is devastating. Out of everyone in both vehicles that night, I was the only survivor. The driver in the other vehicle, died at the wheel, paramedics said he had a heart attack. I saw the truck heading into our lane but by the time my mouth could formulate a response it was already too late.If I had said one word, or uttered anything about the truck, maybe Daniel would still be alive. The accident happened in slow motion. One moment we were laughing but then the next, my mind seemed to have stopped time.As the impact of the truck crashed into us, we slammed back way too fast and I felt the car start to fall off the ledge. I looked to my left at Daniel before the car fell off the bridge and saw blood dripping down his forehead just from the impact of the hit. "Daniel! Daniel!" I screamed, but it was hopeless and deep down I already knew that, I just didn't want to face the truth. I
"The reality is that you'll grieve forever.You'll not 'get over' the loss but learn to live with it, every single waking moment.You'll heal and rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered.You'll be whole again,but you will never be the same againNor should you be the same,nor would you want to beAnd that is the reality of true loss."Elizabeth Kubler-Ross and John Kessler▫️▫️▫️◽️◽️◻️◽️◽️▫️▫️▫️"It's just too hard and I just want to forget ever meeting you, but more importantly I wish I never wrote you into existence," I sighed and turned my back towards him, not wanting to see the sunken look his eyes would form from my words."Is that really how you feel, Val?" He asked, over the noise of the raindrops hitting my window.I did. It was the truth. He had ruined everything but I guess I was also at fault for allowing it to happen... for being weak and letting him in.My breath wavered. "If it prevented me from being lost and miserable without you. From ever having to suff