I hear the sound of helicopter blades in the distance on the property. I am like a kid at Christmas and nervously run my hands through my hair.
Am I clean-shaven? Isn't my cologne too strong? Probably I should change my tie. Or my shoes. Or my jacket. Cazzo. The old butler knocks on my office door to tell me the kids are here. I have to use all my self-control not to sprint down the stairs. I abruptly open the front doors and can't even hide the disappointment on my face. "Oh wow! It's great to see you too, fratello mio. I've missed you too," Matteo says ironically, giving me a sulky pout. I place a hand on top of his head and shake his thick mane. "Where is Lucia?" I ask him without further ado. Matteo blinks quickly as he looks at me. I finally realize that he is carrying two travel bags on each shoulder. Then he gestures with his head back, and I swear I clench my fists so hard you ca"He can sleep with whoever he wants," she cuts me off serenely. "Cazzo, what?" asks Santo. "He can fuck whoever he wants. I am not eighteen yet. Besides, we are not married. Don Elio hasn't promised me anything, and I haven't promised him anything either," she says. I want to howl with laughter at the expressions of my little brothers. "Lulu," Santo articulates, incomprehension visible on his face. Then he points at me before continuing, "Do you even know what you just said?" "Yes," she answers at once before turning her head towards me. I catch her neck, and I come to put her forehead against mine. Thus, we do not smile at each other. We carry on a silent conversation that only we can understand. "Get out of here." Matteo grabs Santo by the arm and pulls him out of the office, grumbling, "It is none of our business." But Santo still points his finger at me: "You lied to us, Elio. Matteo shakes his head and pulls him away with more conviction. "I never lied, Santo. You drew
Lucia and I have agreed that we will not announce our engagement until she has completed her studies. I am committed to respecting her vow of chastity until marriage, but it is a daily struggle for me. I have to admit it to myself, but I love how much extra control it takes over me. I am a crazy bastard. I want her to be by my side all the time. She and Matteo never set foot again in the boarding school where I sent them. Then, as much as I hate the idea of strangers being in my house, I hired a series of home tutors for them. Matteo lasted a month before complaining that he needed a social life and could not stand being locked up anymore. Lucia and I decided that she would not move into my room. I say -she and I-, but that is bullshit. She told me no when I suggested she start moving her stuff. So, after hours of tense negotiations with my Light, she agreed to join me at nap time, but only in one of the vi
_ Lucia's eighteenth birthday party_. I am outside, sitting with my cousins on large couches, as the laughter of Lucia's guests rises in the garden. The daughters and sons of the families around the ages of my Light are there. They are playing all around the pool, and some are in the water. Lucia wears a simple white dress with thin straps, but a stronzo has just sprayed her with a water gun. Everyone can see through the underwear she is wearing underneath. Matteo has just thrown the stronzo, who dared to wet her, into the pool without any mercy while he quickly throws a towel to my Light. In one hand, I have a glass of cognac; on the other, I hold a cigar that I have not lit yet. I am furious, and my jaws are clenched so tightly that I am sure my veins must be visible to everyone. Stronzi can see what is mine through the wet cloth that sticks to her skin. My cousins laugh at the scene
(Lucia, a few minutes earlier) "What's this?" I ask my friends as they place a package on my chest. "Your birthday present, Luciano!" Maria cheerfully replies, giving me a satisfied smile. "Open it, Luciano," Valentina urges me. "It's from Didi, Maria, and me. Guaranteed success!" I tear open the package, wondering what they might have chosen together. I am really surprised because even though we all get along, we have very opposite characters and radically different tastes from each other. I freeze as I pull the two pieces of fabric from the package and give them a questioning look. "What is this?" I repeat again. Valentina shakes her head mockingly as Maria removes her dress in front of me before declaring: "We all have the same ones, but in different colors." Valentina, in turn, takes off her dress and snaps her green bikini top strap over her collarbone. " Finally, when we say all, you know well that Didi did not take one for her. On the other hand, she is the one who fou
Merda! This stronzo has his hands on my chest and is having a great time. I push him away, then start flailing my legs furiously to get to the surface. I take a deep breath when my head finally comes up. Matteo has dived in to join me, and the tears that are welling up in my eyes do not escape him. "What is wrong with you, Lulu? Did he hurt you?" I do not answer. I am far too upset about what just happened. It is my fault. It is because of the clothes I am wearing. This would never have happened if I had worn shorts and my long-sleeved Lycra. Matteo and I swim side by side to the poolside. No sooner do I put my hand on the pool's edge than I feel myself being gently lifted out of the water. Elio is there. He saw the moment the other stronzo pushed me into the water. I look down because I am too ashamed to look at him at this moment. My feet finally make contact with the tiles at the pool's edge, and I cringe slightly when I
_Elio_I am completely floored by what just happened. I think I am going to have another debt to the Columbo girl, and I just created a new one for the Gabino girl. The Madonna! And they say that men are the ones who are hot-blooded! I turn my head towards the stronzo who has committed a crime against what is mine, and I approach the future Don Gabino and him with a calm step. "Speak. What did you do to piss off Maria and Valentina like that?" orders Gabino. He starts to laugh like a child who has been caught doing something stupid. My rage and his hands rise as he moves his hooked fingers twice before his future Don. "I just fiddled a little with Lulu underwater. It's her birthday, and Lucia needs to relax a bit." The future Don Gabino does not have time to react as I have already grabbed the stronzo by the hair and dragged him with me into the water. "Get out of here," I order the girls who are still around
I go back to my office and light a cigar, but I still rant. The stronzo is dead, but that is not enough for me. The Gabino son follows me. He runs a hand through his hair and whistles to himself: "Cazzo. I screwed up, and I forgot that Lucia was under your protection." I abruptly grab his head and pull it back. "Open your mouth," I order him coldly. He contemplates me with rage but sticks out his tongue while continuing to stare at me. I take malicious pleasure in putting my cigar on his tongue while his face twists in pain. Then I release him and put my cigar in my ashtray. I walk over to my minibar and pour him some ice cubes into a crystal glass. "Lucia is not only under my protection," I inform him, handing him the glass. The Gabino son slides two ice cubes into his mouth, then frowns as he looks at me. "Lucia is my fiancée, Gabino." I can see his hands shake as he finally realizes the enormity of what has happened. Then I move closer to him to come and put a hand on his
(Lucia: today) I open my eyes suddenly and am taken for a short moment by panic. I do not recognize the room or the sheets where I am lying. I put my hands on my face and let out a deep sigh. Merda. I spent the night with Elio. No, it's not that. We went to his apartment to have breakfast. Then he arranged for me to work from his place. We had lunch, then dinner, and then nothing. I fell asleep on the couch in his living room. I lift the blanket and almost squeal with relief when I realize I am wearing clothes. I get up but sit on the edge of the bed. I take a moment to let my feet sink into the soft carpet of the room. I move my head to get rid of the stiffness in my neck and can't help but run a hand through my short hair. I have been dreaming all night. I dreamed of my youth, of Elio, of us. Why? I never dreamed of that. I never needed or wanted it. It's as if my brain was making me remember something important. Something that would have happened eleven years ago.