she isn't breathing

LILITH'S POV

I felt jittery. Rubbing my clammy palms on the A-shaped brown skirt I wore for the umpteenth time, I placed my hand on my raving heart.

"Take a deep breath, Lilith, and remember that the universe is unfolding as it should be." taking two deep reassuring gulps of air as if my life depended on it, I walked towards the entrance of the hall.

I had practiced for the test a week before and was sure it was also child's play. In fact, I had skimmed through my notes before arriving at school. However, I couldn't tell why I was afraid of failing.

Maybe it was because of Social Psychology (PSY 340), and I had heard a lot of rumors from the seniors about that class.

I guessed it was because I learned one could fail without trying, which made me a bit nervous.

"Fuck, watch where you are going?!" A voice growled, causing me to jump back in fright. I had almost slammed into him. It was my fault; I didn't watch where I was going.

"I'm sorry," I stuttered, bending to pick up my book that was lying on the floor at the same time the stranger did the same.

I stilled as our hands grazed each other. This would be the moment in movies when you bump into someone on your first day in school, then your things fall off, and both of you bend to pick it up at once. Immediately, your hands touch, and you'd stare at each other.

Only that this was reality and not a film. Also, I wasn't interested in staring at the person because I already knew who he was.

I recognized the signet ring on his middle finger. The skull adorned the black ring and the silver symbols in it.

Giovanni Ricci. What the hell was he doing here?

Had he been stalking me? Now I knew why today was precisely off. I had never felt this nervous before.

Right from home, I had felt a strange sensation, a prickling at the back of my neck.

You know, the same feeling you get when you believe something terrible is about to happen? Yeah, that was it.

I had felt eyes on me, following every movement I made, but I had dismissed it and attributed it to the test because I only lived with my brother and mother, and at the moment, my mother was bedridden.

There was no way she was the one watching me. Even my brother had left for his high school, and I often know the way it feels to be watched by him.

Now I knew the reason. It was because I was meeting with him. What the hell was he doing here anyway? Did he find out about my identity, and he had traced me to school?

No, I didn't think so. This morning, as soon as I came awake, the makeup was still on my face, although my mascara had run down my cheeks; I wondered if I had cried. Also, the jet-black wig that I had used was still on my head.

I was glad he hadn't moved to pull it off. They'd have been intrusive if it were to be some other men.

"Are you okay?" Giovanni asked and made a move to grip my hand.

Instinctively, I flinched, picking up my book. I straightened, and muttered, "Sorry," then dashed away from his presence.

I couldn't let him recognize me. It wasn't a good idea to mix business with pleasure. It had always been a rule, but I had messed up last night.

Hopefully, Marco would overlook that mistake and give me a second chance. But not with Giovanni. I didn't think I was interested in gathering more information on him because he was trouble, and I didn't want to put my nose where it wasn't needed.

⫷◍◍◍◍◍◍◍◍◍⫸

The test wasn't as awful as I had imagined it. In fact, it was easier than I could have imagined and I was glad I had studied hard for it.

"Thank you," I stepped out of Melvin's blue pickup truck. Aside from Casey, Melvin was one of the reasons I found going to school bearable.

It wasn't just because he tried to stop people from bullying me all the time; Melvin was brilliant, and he had also helped me with several lessons.

Melvin was good-looking with russet brown hair and slate-gray eyes. He had the good look of a football star, and I guessed that was one of the reasons he was part of the college football team.

A lot of girls had made me their enemies due to Melvin's involvement in my life. Even though I had tried to clarify things many times about being uninterested in him, no one seemed to care.

I waited for Melvin to drive out of the lot before entering inside, but he didn't leave.

"You should go," he said, leaning into the seat beside his and staring at me from the wound-down window.

I nodded. There was no need to argue with Melvin since this often happened. He would not leave if I didn't and creating attention to myself was the last thing I wanted.

I sighed, walking towards the entrance of the apartment we lived in, ignoring the neighbors' eyes that were outside.

We lived on the fourth floor of the building, with no elevator, so I needed to take a flight of stairs leading there. It was a hassle doing this each day but it wasn't as if I had a choice.

Opening the door with my key, I closed it behind me, turning the lock twice out of habit.

I knew it wouldn't keep the mouse out— the clanking pipes, the muffled arguments from the floor below, the heavy footsteps that echo up the narrow stairwell, but it was something I liked doing.

The living room, if I could even call it that was mostly taken up by my lumpy thrift-store couch. I threw an old quilt over it to cover the stains, but the cushions were so sunken I might as well sit on the floor.

The TV flickered in the corner on its last legs, and I couldn't bring myself to throw it out as I had bought it with my first salary and it was still useful. Stacked around it were textbooks and crumpled notes from my classes, along with bills I had yet to pay.

"How's mom?" I nudged Romeo who was huddled in front of the TV.

"Fine, took her meds, said she'll be sleeping early," Romeo replied without taking his eyes off the TV.

I stared at it for a brief seconds, before shaking my head. He was watching Spongebob cartoon. I didn't understand how a sixteen-year-old would be so invested in a cartoon and find it funny.

Maybe my life was messed up because I had heard many students in my class conversing about Cartoons they had seen and the ones they would like to see next.

Dropping my bag on the couch, I rubbed my stomach as it growled. I stepped into the kitchen— just a few steps away.

Opening the cabinets overhead, I grimace. There was nothing much to see. A box of pasta, and a couple of cans of soup.

"Eaten yet?" I asked Romeo and he shook his head.

"Was waiting on you," he replied, his eyes still glued to the TV.

I needed to go grocery shopping, so I made a mental note. "Give me a few minutes," I mumbled.

The pasta was the only thing I could prepare with my few ingredients. Also, it was an okay and quick meal.

In twenty minutes I was done and I was exhausted. I didn't sleep the night before due to the test preparation.

I had hoped to get a few minutes of rest before going to the clubhouse. There was still enough time since I needed to resume work by 10 pm, which was when most of the important people arrived at the clubhouse.

"Serve yourself, Romeo," I muttered, trudging to my bedroom. Despite my hunger earlier, I was too tired to eat.

⫷◍◍◍◍◍◍◍◍◍⫸

A scream jolted me awake. I scrambled out of bed, walking to the room Romeo shared with my mom. Well, there was extra room; he was the one who insisted he wanted to sleep near her so he could monitor her health.

My mother had agreed and I couldn't disagree.

"Romeo!" I called out, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes.

"Mom, please no," I heard his wail.

My heartbeat quickened, likewise my step. It was only a few miles away; why was I taking so long to get there?

Pushing the door that led to the room open, I dashed towards where my mother was, still on the bed. But she was still, despite Romeo shaking her.

"S—she isn't breathing!" he gasped out, clutching at his chest. "Do something, Lilith. I don't want her to die."

That seemed to snap me out of my daze; I dashed to my bedroom and dialed the emergency number.

In no time, the paramedics were here and we made our way to the hospital.

This journey to the hospital seemed to be the longest in my life. While holding my mother's hand, I kept praying to God to keep her safe. Even if it was the only thing he'd do in my life, I'd appreciate that.

She was the only reason I was still living; I didn't think I would be here without her.

I paced around the hospital corridor, my heart jumping each time I saw a nurse coming out of the room my mother was in with a grim expression. None had answered my questions and they had all treated me as though I was bothering them.

I had tried to keep my calm, but it was almost impossible to do so.

Romeo was seated, but he was crying and praying at the same time.

"She'll be fine," I assured him for the umpteenth time.

I was also assuring myself because I didn't want to think otherwise.

Eventually, the doctor stepped out of the room and I walked towards him.

"How's she? Is she alive?"

"She is, for now," he stressed out the words.

"I'm glad she was brought here immediately; otherwise, it could be disastrous. Also, the cancerous cell is spreading so fast, and it has almost covered half part of her brain, surgery needs to be done as soon as possible." He advised.

"And that requires money," I whispered, bitterly.

"I'm sorry..."

"Lilith," I offered.

"Lilith. I am not the one who'd be in charge of that because we'll need some professionals in this field, and even if I were, I would not be the boss here. I am a worker like the others, and I do not have a say over who needs to get treated before payment." he said.

"Right," I nodded, sniffling back tears.

"The total should be about a hundred thousand dollars, but not exceeding that. I believe an advance payment of fifty thousand dollars will be great to commence treatment." He said, walking away from me.

Where the fuck do I get such a ridiculous amount of money? Aside from what I had gotten from whoring with Giovanni, most of the money I had worked for went into Chemo, and the only left with me was a few thousand dollars, not even enough, for two months' groceries for three fucking people!

I kicked at the wall, wincing as pain flared up in the area. "Fuck my life."

"What did he say?" Romeo asked as he walked up to me.

"She's alive, Romeo. You need to stop crying," I pulled him into my embrace patting his back.

Still, I couldn't help but wonder for how long she was going to live for because I didn't imagine where I could get the 100k dollars from after messing up the mission I was given.