We shower in cool water as I slide soapy fingers over Celina's curves. She's facing away from me with her shoulder leaning against the wall of the shower. Whereas she was content a few minutes ago, she's troubled now. I feel her tension as my hands glide across her skin. "Tell me what you're thinking, mi corazón."She doesn't make a sound, but after a few moments, I see the tremble in her shoulders and turn her so I can see her face. The pain I see in her eyes has me pulling her against my chest. I run my fingers over her wet hair as she cries. She's been so strong and this shouldn't surprise me. It guts me. I don't want her tears and would do anything in my power to stop them. She mumbles something against my chest and I move her slightly away. She looks at me with pure desolation."I don't know how to be a mother," comes out between more sobs."Oh, baby," I say as I pull her against me again. What do I say? I haven't the slightest idea how to be a father."She needs so much and I don
I arrive at the nursing home an hour later. It's a large white building that looks exactly like what it is: A place to die. I wipe my eyes again. Having a driver has its benefits, though sitting in the back of the car and thinking about all the overwhelming details is not one of them. On the only positive side I can come up with, having a driver most likely saved me from crashing my car.I left Kiley with Gabriella and Alex and I can't think about it right now. My mother is sitting beside my father when I enter the room. Her hand is resting on his pale, lifeless one. She glances over her shoulder and sees me. That's when she leans into my father and begins sobbing on his chest. I walk over and put my hand on her back.I inhale deeply because even in this place, the smell of sugar cookies rolls off her and brings me home. She feels so frail. When did that happen and why didn't I notice?The man lying in the bed with his slack, frozen features is not my father. He's been gone for many mo
All I can do is be thankful that Gabriella takes over with Kiley. When Gabriella walked into the kitchen, I was doing my best to wipe juice off Kiley's face and fingers. In Spanish Gabriella let me know exactly what I was doing wrong. Apparently I needed more water on the paper towel that is now stuck to the child's fingers. I made my escape as soon as possible.Then, things went from bad to worse. I received a call from the men I sent to Antigua. Manuel is dead and Danita nowhere to be found. I have Cal using his computer skills and checking airline manifests. Thankfully, the flights out of Antigua are limited to only a handful of airlines. Of course, there's always the ocean. That escape route will be harder to track. Danita isn't stupid, so I expect none of this to be easy.With Kiley in Gabriella's capable hands, I drive to Manuel's wife and inform her of his death. They'd been married for ten years and don't have any children. Giving her the news is bad enough and I shouldn't be r
If not for the frequent conversations with Alex, I would be crazy. I haven't seen him or Kiley in three days. He gives me assurances and even talked dirty during one of our short calls. For a few minutes, I was able to forget this crazy world I've been thrust into and dream about the next time I'm in his bed. I really need him doing all those dirty things he's so good at.Yesterday, Gabriella called and said she had arranged for two women to provide food at my mom's house after the funeral. I couldn't question her about Kiley because I hadn't found the chance to tell my mom about her or Lee. I feel like the worst person on the planet and guilt eats at me.When my mother and I arrived at the funeral home to meet with the director, we found out that Alex had covered the expenses. I should have done something to stop him from paying the bill. In reality, I'm too indebted to Alex already, but I have no idea how to stop him from spending his money on me. I'll save that for another day.It's
No one in their right mind enjoys funerals and least of all me. Watching Celina suffer with her father's loss won't be easy. She sounded so incredibly sad when I spoke to her by phone, and it's hard not having her close and wrapping my arms around her. With my lack of sleep, I'm pathetic over wanting her near me. I've lived with the images for so long that they've become part of me. Now, I know what it's like to sleep soundly. Yes... pathetic.I'll be attending another funeral as soon as Manuel's body is in Arizona. As of now, it's unknown how long the Antigua authorities will keep it. Murder is a rare occurrence there and the government isn't happy. Moon's lawyer spoke to an investigator for two hours last night. He told them Manuel was in Antigua to offer protection to Ms. Danita Moon because she is Moon's beloved aunt. Now she's missing and her bodyguard dead.The attorney proceeded to throw incriminations back on the investigator and told him Ms. Moon retired to Antigua because of
Alex's entire body goes taut. I shouldn't have brought him in the car with me. It was selfish to want him close. Of course my mother would ask prying questions. She's a mother and I should have considered what this car ride would entail. She has a captive audience. Alex and I don't have a relationship beyond the physical. I know nothing about his family other than what he's told me about Madison and Moon, which is very little.I place my hand on his and offer a silent apology. His fingers squeeze back and then he tells my mother about his parents. "They're dead. My father died about eight years ago and my mother when I was a young boy."My mother leans over me and takes his free hand. "You poor dear. To lose them both is awful, but to lose your mother when you were young is beyond painful. Do you have any siblings?"I fight a groan and have no idea how to shut my mother up."A sister. She has two children; a boy and a girl. She lives out of state and I don't see her. Madison and Moon a
We received news this morning that the guns were delivered to our connection in Mexico. Corbin kept his word. With the added stress over the past few days, the unwanted images continue to play in my head. I've worked out, meditated, and worked out again. Yesterday with Celina helped more than all the cardio and weights combined. She's my temporary cure. The picture of my father came out of nowhere. It's happened before and caused problems. Moon extricated me from one very bad situation. I think he's known for years that I hide something deeper behind an easy smile or a joke. I refuse to discuss it with him. He'll think I'm insane. Hell, I most likely am. There's been no word on Danita and our frustration builds. She's gone to ground and I know she couldn't do it without help. We also don't have a date on the return of Manuel's body. The Feds had a sit-down with Moon and his attorney yesterday afternoon. Moon said nothing and let his attorney speak for him. The last thing we need is
I find my mother in the theater room having popcorn and watching a movie with Kiley. My niece is snuggled up against her. My mom picks up popcorn and holds it over Kiley's hand until the little fingers uncurl. Such a small thing, but Kiley is responding.They're watching an animated movie that I remember from when I was young. I walk in and sit beside Kiley and share some popcorn. She scoots closer to my mother and another small piece of my heart breaks. She makes headway with everyone but me and I have no clue why. It sounds ridiculous, but is there something in her that senses I never wanted children? That's completely untrue now. I watch the movie and ignore my guilt. Alex is making phone calls. My mom smiles at me over the top of Kiley's head and I see tears in her eyes. For her, Kiley is a small piece of heaven. This will work out and I need patience more than anything.The movie ends thirty minutes later and Kiley has fallen asleep. "She's precious," my mother says quietly. Her f
I stayed with Mr. Loche for two hours. When I came back to the cabin, Father Andrews and Madison were cooking dinner together in the kitchen. She was laughing and he was telling her that anyone can learn to cook, it just takes practice. I don't add my two cents that the meal Mrs. Loche prepared would have been safer. I word it a little more carefully, "Please don't encourage her. Gabriella will throw a fit if Madison moves in on her territory." They stop what they're doing and I receive my first genuine smile from Madison that I've seen in weeks."It's a simple lasagna. Mak can make it when you're here at the cabin. Even I wouldn't do anything to piss off Gabriella." He cringes with great exaggeration and Madison laughs.She looks at him with a huge smile. "You didn't tell me you know Gabriella.""I know her daughter. I've heard all the stories from her and I'm terrified of her mother."I walk to my wife and wrap my arms around her from behind. She leans into me and places her hands on
It's three more days before our guest arrives. I'm actually tongue-tide when Moon introduces me to Father Andrews. He's American but lives in Mexico and drove all this way to return a favor he owed my husband. He's younger than a priest has a right to be and he's too damn good looking for his job. I place him in his early thirties. It's strange because he looks oddly familiar even though I'm sure I've never met him.The three of us walk into the living room where Mrs. Loche put out cucumber sandwiches and chocolate chip cookies. Father Andrews's eyes light up. "I haven't eaten since breakfast and these look delicious," he says while filling a plate.Moon doesn't sit with us. "Mr. Loche and I are working on a new garden and clearing some land. I'll be next door if you need me." He leans down and places his lips on mine for a short kiss. It actually embarrasses me because Father Andrews is watching. Moon taps me under the chin in understanding because of the heat traveling up my neck and
With revenge motivating me, dealing with what happened was easier. The need for blood became a driving force that allowed me to put my thoughts and feelings on hold. Now my feelings, doubt, and shame overshadow everything. My mind is a dark hole with a smoky mist that Moon stands in to beckon me out. His hand is there. I can almost touch it, but my fingers slide away, a millimeter short, and the darkness covers me once more.Sleep is the worst. Nightmares make me toss and turn throughout the night. Most center around blood on my hands. They drip the red, congealed mess onto everything I touch and when I open my eyes it's still there. Or so the dream goes.I find it strange that I don't dream about what Fernandez did to me. It's his laughter, though, that wakes me night after night. Moon is always there to comfort me during those horrible hours. He pulls me close to his body when I give the slightest gasp. I breathe in his scent and fill my lungs with his strength. Until I fall asleep a
Part of my heart-stopping fury recedes when I pull Madison back into my arms. Her entire body is shaking and she's still clutching the knife I handed her. Alex takes it from her hand after I scoop her into my arms and cradle her against my chest. I breathe in the scent of her hair and try to gain more control.This woman is everything. She's the reason I wake up in the morning. Everything I hold dear is wrapped up in her. Cori meets my eyes and she tips her head in acknowledgement. When she turns away, Duke is standing behind her. He pulls her into his arms and walks her toward the front room. He stops when Goose is dragged closer by one of Dax's men and places himself between Cori and Duke. Duke casually pulls his gun and fires, striking him between the eyes. Goose blankly stares at the ceiling by the time the sound of the gunshot fades from the room. Cori spits on Goose's body before Duke leads her forward. Alex gives orders to clean up the bloody mess."Please take me home," Madison
She steps forward and Fernandez spins and tries throwing a punch at my head but misses. He moves quickly even with a bullet through the foot and gets between Cori and Sofia's rifle. Melina takes the opportunity to bring her gun down on the back of his head. He stumbles and I kick the tibial pressure point in his good leg. He drops and I kick Celina's gun away from him. She grabs it and aims it at him as he wiggles around like a flopping fish. I hand Melina my gun and slam down into his back with my cuffs primed. I practically pull his arms from their sockets in order to secure his hands behind his back while he's stunned."Help me get him up on the kitchen island and I'll cut off his fucking clothes." We drag him back to the kitchen minus Celina who stays at her post, which is the front door. He struggles but it's not enough for four women on a mission.The sick feeling in my stomach stays and I turn slightly and rub tears from my eyes. Not a minute has gone by that I haven't thought a
We park a half mile from the home. Melina and I run up the street, carrying the post driver between us because it's so damn heavy, and check out the property. Like the house he kept me and Cori in, this one is away from other homes and on a nice sized piece of property. The desert foliage on the north side of the area gives us a good vantage point to see the back door. I call Celina."Send Cori north to our location. The front door is on the south side of the house and you'll have about twenty-five yards from the truck to the door. Sofia will be your driver and leave as soon as you're inside. She'll park and meet us. We'll come through the back five minutes after you enter." We covered all of this in the car, but it helps me to go over the plan out loud again. "Give Cori ten minutes to get in place before Sofia drops you off.""Cori just took off. We're set," Celina says before ending the call.After Cori meets us, we stay low and wait for Sofia to text me that Celina is in the house.
Alex brings the car to the front. Austin jumps into the back and I take the passenger seat. I told the men to put Gabriella in our safe room until everything settles. She can cuss them out in Spanish, I don't have time. Sirens can be heard in the distance and we need to be completely clear of the house before they hit the street that leads to my private road.I've also notified additional men to meet us at the warehouse. As soon as we have Fernandez's location, we'll be moving out quickly. It suddenly occurs to me that Dax is totally out of the loop, so I dial his cell."You're fucking kidding me," he practically yells when I tell him his wife ran over a man and picked up the women. "I'm on my way." Another call comes in and I look at the display. It's Caleb."Start heading here with reinforcements," I tell Dax quickly. "I'll call as soon as we have a location. It won't be long."The man in the trunk is moaning loudly. There are metal plates over the taillights and nothing he can do to
Madison is up to something. The strange feeling persisted while she dressed and then at breakfast. Sending her off to the service without me was nearly impossible. The fact is, I need to get my head out of my ass and take care of Fernandez once and for all. The thought of him taking Madison again is eating me alive.While she's at EE, I can focus on what it takes to keep everyone safe. The Frontera Cartel is out of the picture and now we can focus on one man. I have everyone but our outside security in the conference room. Austin joins us too."How do we bring him out in the open without risking one of our women as bait?" I ask the men. It didn't matter how much Madison complained, there was no way I would give into her plan.I've never reached my current level of frustration as we debate the best scenarios. Alex hasn't said a word since entering the meeting, which surprises me. When I look at him, his eyes are on the door leading to the hallway."What has you worried?" I ask him when
The women with Celina give whoops and atta-girl shouts. I can't help smiling. "We'll be another thirty minutes. There's a building supply store not far from you and I need you to pick up two metal fence post drivers." I never worked Cave Creek as a cop, but one of the officers lived there and loved having barbeques, so I'm familiar with the area."We're on it. Meet us in the parking lot."I disconnect the call and decide to join Cori in the front. I wiggle between the seats and then lean back and exhale after I attach my seatbelt. "I'm worried Moon could beat us there."Cori puts her foot on the gas and shoots forward on the freeway. The 51 is one of the lighter trafficked freeways if you're not driving it during rush hour and we're pushing the witching hour. It's the most direct route from central Phoenix to the north valley and we're in luck because it's wide open. If that luck continues, highway patrol won't have units in the vicinity.We make it to the building supply store in twen