“I love you, Anna,” Arthur repeated.He stared at me expectantly, waiting for an answer. His eyes widened, and they reminded me of the doe eyes that my brother Michael used to give me when we were children and he wanted to get something from me. It made my stomach churn, and I almost vomited all over again.How was I to respond to that? He saw how I responded to Barnett being with Julia the night before; did he think that my feelings could be changed so easily? Or was he really so blind to what all that had meant?I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. Arthur was not just my boss; he was one of my closest friends. I didn’t want to lose what we had.At the same time, I couldn’t lie to him and say that I returned his affections. I loved him, but like a brother—like the brothers that he reminded me so much of. I couldn’t lead him on.I could tell by the way his brow furrowed that my hesitation was already causing him doubt and upset feelings. I had to give him an answer, and quickly. I plac
I clutched the phone tighter as my heart raced. It took me a minute to answer, but I finally got up the courage. “Hi Celeste, this is Anna Leonard.”“Oh, hi Ms. Leonard. We’ve been trying to reach you for a follow-up appointment.”The gremlins clawed at my stomach, and I moved closer to the bathroom. I managed to keep the vomit down on the ride home, but I wasn’t sure I could continue to do so.“Mrs. Leonard?”I leaned against the wall. I’d been a coward, but I couldn’t keep avoiding this. “I’m here. I’m just calling to make that follow-up appointment.”“Great, we’ll get you booked in right away.” I could hear typing on the other end of the phone. “Okay, how is a week from today?”“That works.”“Does a morning appointment work for you?”I told her it did, and she booked me in for an early slot. As much as I wanted answers, I still had responsibilities. I’d have to pick myself up and get back to work, regardless of what I found out. Arthur and all the rest of my clients would be expect
The rest of the week went by, and I didn’t see Barnett once. I even went to Stand Up a few times, but he wasn’t there and the man at the desk said he hadn’t been around in a while. I hadn’t heard from Lily either and I couldn’t help but worry. What if she somehow dug up the truth, even with doctor-patient confidentiality? I knew she’d tell Barnett what she found, if he even still cared to know, and I didn’t want that.I knew they’d be mad at me for not telling them, but even if they couldn’t see it, I had a good reason. I didn’t want them to worry about me, and I didn’t want my last weeks and days to be concerned about my cancer. Time was already running out for me, and I wanted–no, needed–to make the most of every second I had left.The day of my appointment arrived, and I woke up nauseous from the nerves. The feeling followed me as I dressed and got everything together for my clients. I took my Corolla for the added privacy and drove to the doctor’s office.I was a little early, but
My first reaction was confusion. How could I be pregnant? “I don’t understand,” I said.Dr. Williams handed me a piece of paper. “These are the results of your blood work. They clearly show that you’re pregnant. You’re a couple of weeks along now.”“I don’t understand,” I said again.My first thought was that they were Bob’s, which was terrible news. What if he wanted to be a part of their lives? The last thing I needed was to be tied to Bob forever. Just being divorced was bad enough, considering he couldn’t seem to leave me alone.Then it dawned on me that the timeline didn’t add up. “You said I’m a few weeks along?”Dr. Williams nodded.“Oh.”It hit me like a brick wall. They were Barnett’s babies, just like in my dreams. The night we hooked up after Lily’s party, we hadn’t used a condom. I didn’t have any in the house and I was far too drunk to think responsibly about protection.Then the other part hit. “What about my cancer?” I said, nearly whispering. “Can I even have the babie
I knew I needed to find Barnett as soon as possible. If I put it off too long, I’d never get up the nerve to tell him the truth. I tried to find him at his apartment building, but no one answered the door when I knocked.I went down to the front desk, thinking I could leave some sort of message for him. The man behind the counter looked up as I approached. “Hi, Mrs. Leonard,” he said. “What can I do for you?”“I’m looking for Barnett, but he isn't here. Can I leave him a message?”“Oh, Mr. Cogsworth hasn’t lived here in a while. In fact, he rarely stays here. I think he’s been staying at one of his other properties.” Other properties? How many did he have?“Oh, okay. Never mind, then.”He gave me an apologetic smile before turning back to his computer. I trailed back across the lobby, my thoughts all over the place. If he hardly ever lived here, why was he around the whole time I stayed in that apartment? Was it just to be near me? Could Lily have been right about his intentions this
Julia moved closer, but she stopped when she saw the look on my face. She had nothing on but a silk robe. She hadn’t even bothered to put on shoes before she came outside. I noticed, with some satisfaction, that she had ugly feet. It was nice to know she wasn’t perfect everywhere.“What do you want?” she said.“Nothing from you,” I snapped. I didn’t know where it came from, but I couldn’t hold my anger back. “I’m looking for Barnett.”Her gaze darkened. “He’s not here.”“Fine. Do you know where I can find him?” It was a long shot, but I was getting desperate. He needed to know the truth.“He doesn’t want to see you,” she said, taking another step forward. “And you’re not welcome here.” She took out her phone and typed something into the screen. A moment later, a guard walked up.“Ms., I’m here to escort you off the property,” he said, gesturing for me to get back into my car. It wasn’t like I could refuse him. He was a wall of muscle.I glared at Julia. The embarrassment made my heart
Arthur put me in touch with his producers the next day, and I spent part of the morning on a business call with them.“We really want you on the show,” Mr. Cooper, the creator of the show, said. His co-producer, who introduced herself as Irene, nodded along with him. “Arthur has said wonderful things about you, and your work with Freyja has impressed us.”“Thank you,” I said.It felt weird to hear their compliments, and I had to remind myself to just accept t
We were leaving in two weeks, and I had to break the news to my other clients. The hardest was StarRise. She was my biggest client aside from Arthur, and even though it had been challenging, I had a great time working with her. She was a lot of fun to style.“I can’t believe you’re leaving me,” she said for the millionth time since I’d told her.“I know, but I couldn’t turn down the opportunity.”She nodded. “It’s going to be so huge f
9 years later… I sat down in the first row, my coffee cup balanced in my hands. The rink was cold, and I was bundled up in a sweater and a winter coat. Beside me, Lily sat with my daughter on her lap. Winnie was just three years old, and she was already asleep on Lily’s shoulder, the hood of her pink parka pulled up over her head. The sight of them together warmed my heart.“Damn, she’s getting heavy,” Lily said.I smiled. “I know. They grow up fast.”She nodded. Lily didn’t have kids, and I didn’t think she ever wanted to. She was happy being Cool Aunt Lily, and I thought that was amazing. She still traveled all over the world, bringing exotic gifts back for her niece and nephews.“She asks about you all the time now,” I said. “She calls you ‘wi-wy.’”“Adorbs.” Lily hugged her closer. “We’re going to be besties when she’s older.”“For sure.”“Scratch that. We’re already besties.”The first period was about to start, and I sat up straighter. Both teams were on their benches. I could
“I’m the father,” he repeated.I nodded. “That’s why I was trying to find you. I wanted to tell you, but after what Julia said, I thought you never wanted to see me again. If not for Lily, I would have continued to think that. Still, I’m sorry you’re only finding out now.”A sad look crossed his face, and he put his head in his hands. “God, I’m sorry.”I stood up and walked around the desk. His muscles tensed, but he didn’t look up as I ran my hands over his shoulders. “You’re here now,” I said.“I should’ve been with you the whole time.”He swiveled around in his chair and hugged me, his face resting lightly against my stomach. I ran a hand through his soft blond hair. “I’m so sorry,” he said. He looked up at me and gave me a wide smile. My heart skipped a beat. “I’m really happy, Anna.”“You are?”“You have no idea.” He still hadn’t let go of me, but I didn’t want him to. I never wanted him to. If I could have stayed in his arms forever, I would have.“I’m happy too,” I said, tears
Barnett gestured for me to sit down, and I took one of the plush armchairs across from his desk.“Can I get you anything?” he asked. “Water or something?”I shook my head. “No, I’m alright.”He nodded and sat down in his leather chair. “Either Lily is clairvoyant, or she convinced you to come here,” he said after a moment of awkward silence.“She’s adamant that we talk.”He just nodded again.Another long stretch of silence ensued as I searched for something to say.“You look great,” he said. I wasn’t used to this awkwardness between us. It seemed to squeeze at my throat, preventing the words from rising. So much time had passed, and he felt both familiar to me and completely a stranger.“I heard about your father,” I answered, ignoring his compliment completely. That felt like dangerous territory. “I’m sorry he was sick. Is he doing better now?”“He is,” he said. “It was tough going for a while, but he’s doing a lot better now. Good enough to kick me out, anyway.”“He sounds like a c
“Barnett, open up!” Lily called.Barnett sighed and got out of bed. It was still early in the morning, early enough that he wanted to yell at her through the door and tell her to go away. He hardly slept as it was. The last thing he needed was an early morning wake-up call.He pulled on his robe and stomped over to the door.“Barnett!” she called again.He yanked open the door and scowled down at her. “Do you know what time it is?”She smirked and shoved past him into his apartment. At least she had two coffee cups with her. She handed him one and he took a sip. It was still hot, and it burned his tongue.“It’s a beautiful day,” she said.“Is it?”He sank down onto his couch and pulled his robe tighter around him. Lily didn’t sit down, she just started pacing back and forth in front of him. He was much too tired to deal with all her energy. Lily wasn’t much of a morning person either, but today she was clearly on something.“Did you sleep at all last night?”“Like a baby,” she said, h
I’d been home for nearly a month, and people were still talking about my ‘relationship’ with Arthur. It was really starting to drive me crazy. To the point where I knew I’d have to set the story straight if I ever wanted the rumors and speculation to stop.The nursery was mostly finished now, and the rest of the rooms were looking better, too. I had my office set up with a desk and some of my filming equipment. I planned to use it mostly for behind-the-scenes stuff, but it would work if I needed to film a quick video like I did now.I decided to just film a sit-down video. I’d been filming my vlogs at the gym in my building, and while that was going well, I’d avoided addressing everything with Arthur.I knew people were still talking about it because the comments on my videos were mostly about our relationship. People wanted to know why we weren’t traveling together more. If we were going to get married. What we planned to name the babies.Everyone seemed convinced that they were his,
I wiped my hand across my cheek, realizing at the last second that I had blue paint on my fingers. I rushed over to the bathroom and laughed when I caught sight of myself in the mirror. There was pale blue paint smeared across my cheek, dotted across my white t-shirt. There was even a bit of paint at the ends of my hair that I would probably have to cut off.Deciding to decorate the nursery myself might have been a bad idea, but I couldn’t deny I was having a lot of fun. As much as I was making a mess, it felt meaningful to do it myself. To pour all my love and hope into that one little room.The cribs were arriving in a couple of days, and I already have a tall, white dresser to put in there for all the baby clothes. I bought a changing table from a lady online and it was already up and waiting in my new office. There were still quite a few things I needed before the babies were born, but I was finally on track.After arriving home, I decided that the first thing I needed to do was f
He couldn’t stop looking at the pictures. He knew he needed to, but Barnett couldn’t turn away. They were all over the internet. Everywhere he went, the photos and videos of them taunted him. They were holding hands on a sailboat. Sitting together on a rock, their faces red from their hike. Having dinner beneath the stars in some far-off place with just trees and mountains for miles, looking far more intimate than Barnett would have liked.One headline caught his eye as he scrolled, and he sucked in a breath.PREGNANT FITNESS INFLUENCER ANNA LEONARD TRAVELS WITH FAMOUS BOYFRIEND ARTHUR STARDUSTHe finally forced himself to put down his phone. Agonizing over it wasn’t helping him. Anna was happy without him. He just had to accept that somehow and move on, even if it seemed like an impossible thing to do. She was clearly in love with Arthur.Just as he placed his phone down on his desk, it rang.He picked it up without checking the Caller ID, half-convinced it was Anna calling. That he’
Lily found Barnett at his apartment. She had to knock a few times before he finally came to the door, a slight scowl on his face.“So, you’re back,” she said.He stepped aside to let her in. She closed the apartment door behind her and trailed him into the room. “How was Egypt?”“It was fine. Saw the pyramids.” He looked interested, but she wasn’t there to talk about Egypt. “Have you been online recently?”
I stopped in front of the mirror and pulled up my shirt. A few months of filming later, and I was really starting to show. I kept having to buy new clothes as my size changed. Those jeans I worked so hard to fit into didn’t even make it past my thighs now.I dropped my shirt and looked over my outfit. I had on a pair of workout leggings, sneakers, and a form-fitting pullover that showed off my protruding belly. Arthur and I were hiking today for our segment. My hair was up in a high ponytail, and I had some natural makeup on. Without it, I had dark circles under my eyes from all the early morning shoots.