I've only met Calder once in person, but that was enough. It was at the Frazer Center's Arts & Hearts fundraiser, a black tie dinner we host every Valentine's Day in our gallery space. The affair is our most formal event of the year, and in addition to raising a good chunk of money, it's our chance to honor our biggest donors and supporters. Wentworth Cunningham attended the event every year, but last February - about five months before he died - he brought his son Calder along as well.I'll admit it: I was excited to meet the infamous heir to the Cunningham fortune. I mean, you can't even pop through the supermarket checkout line without spotting him on one of the tabloids - usually on some Italian beach with the latest "it" girl. I was curious. I couldn't help it.Calder was, at first glance, everything I expected. There seems to be one in every "old money" family: the son with the good looks and bad behavior to spare. He definitely lived up to his photos. Some would call him the e
He takes me to a bedroom.As soon as the door swings open and I see the enormous four-poster bed, I spin on him in a fury."What exactly are you trying to pull?" I say. "If you think you can march me to a bedroom and I'll just - "He cuts me off with a finger against my lips."My sister keeps her extra clothes in the closet here," he says. "I'd guess you two are about the same size."Oh. His sister. I completely forgot he has a sibling. She shows up in the tabloids sometimes, too, but usually for a different reason - she seems to share her late father's dedication to philanthropy."Louisa, right?" I say against his fingers. "Is she here too?"Calder shakes his head and removes his hand from my lips. The warmth of his touch lingers a moment longer."She's off saving the world, as usual," he says. "She left for Southeast Asia not long after the funeral."I don't miss the hint of bitterness in his voice, but I don't dare push the matter any further."You're welcome to wear whate
Panic rises in my throat."You mean I'm stranded here? With you?""It appears so." Calder eyes me over his glass. "You don't have to look so terrified. I'm not going to devour you or anything.""That's not exactly the impression you gave me a moment ago.""Believe it or not, I prefer my women consenting. Enthusiastic, even. Until you're willing to admit that you're attracted to me, I won't lay a finger on you. After that...""There won't be an 'after that'. I'm not attracted to you. Quite the opposite, actually. You're an asshole, and I don't care if I'm stuck here tonight. Nothing is going to happen between us.""Very well then," he says, nonplussed. "But since you can't leave, would you care to return to the table? I don't want Martin's hard work to get cold while we sit here at our little stalemate.""It's not a stalemate," I insist. "There's no discussion here. Nothing will happen between us."He nods, unconcerned, and I want nothing more than to smack that smug smile off o
I move slowly along the passage, the phone held out in front of me. The faint blue glow from the screen is just enough to keep me from walking into the walls. The corridor twists and turns ahead of me, and after five minutes I've already completely lost my bearings. I have no idea which direction I'm going or where I might end up. My only consolation is that there's only one way back, so it's unlikely I'll get too lost.As my eyes adjust to the darkness, I begin to notice other details. At regular intervals along the walls, for example, I start spotting small, nondescript door handles. Some have even been brushed with pale paint, making them easier to spot among the shadows. I stop at one and give it a wiggle. The door creaks open, revealing the dark room beyond.Part of me wants to venture out into the room, but another part feels weird poking around without Calder. I step back into the passage and pull the door closed behind me. I tell myself I should turn around and go back to my
When I get back to my room, I pull out my phone. The calls were an excuse, but it's probably still a good idea to let my dad know I'll be delayed longer than I expected. I hate leaving him alone back at the Center, but there's nothing I can do. I'm stuck here, whether I like it or not.Dad's flustered when I get him on the line. He sounds even worse than he did last night."What's going on?" I say.He sighs. "Ella quit this morning. She felt really bad about it, you could see, but she found a position at an office downtown. Not that I blame her. Her last paycheck bounced. We were going to have to let her go soon anyway, and she was smart enough to see that."I don't blame her either. Ella's stuck with us through a lot, but she has to make a living, just like everyone else. Still, now there's even more work on my dad's shoulders."I hate to leave you swamped," I say. "I promise I'll be home as soon as I can. As soon as the road's clear, I'll be back. I'll stay at the Center all nig
The first thing I do when I get back to my room is check my phone.There's a new message.I take a deep breath and press the voicemail button before I have the chance to lose my nerve. I know without even looking at my missed calls that the message is from Garrett."Hey, Lils. Got your message. Give me a call back when you can." His voice is casual, as if my calling him was perfectly ordinary - as if I haven't spent the last several months actively ignoring his attempts to contact me. There's no anger in his voice, but there's no pleasure, either. His tone gives no indication of what he thinks of my request. I'm instantly suspicious. For all I know, he wants me to call him so he can laugh in my face.But I'm not going to let myself take the coward's way out any longer. This isn't about me or my pride. It's about the Center. Before I can talk myself out of it, I click the button to call Garrett.This time he picks up on the first ring."Hey," he says.My stomach twists at the sou
The corner of Calder's mouth curls up in that charming little half smile of his. He spreads his arms wide."Make your guess," he says, his eyes gleaming wickedly. "I'll be waiting.""How do I know you won't change your answer if I guess correctly?""You can trust me," he insists.I'm not sure I can, but this is going too well for me to want to pick a fight. He seems to be enjoying our little game, and I mean to play him for all he's worth.I continue my stroll down the gallery, scanning the art on either side of me as I pass, looking for anything that jumps out from the others. I'm at a major disadvantage here, that much is certain, but I'm willing to lose this battle if it means ultimately winning the war.Still, the competitive side of me wants to give it my best shot. I'd really love to see his face when I get it right. My eyes roam over the collection. There are paintings of every style and medium I can imagine, as well as sculptures of clay, wood, metal, even marble.I stop
What the fuck just happened?I lean against the wall, trying to catch my breath, while Calder holds his hand out to me as if we were just having a perfectly normal conversation."Ready for the rest of the tour?"Like fuck I am. I can hardly stand upright. He just had his fingers inside me and now he wants to pretend like none of it ever happened? My breasts are still hanging out, for fuck's sake.I straighten and quickly yank my dress back up."What the hell was that?" I say.He withdraws his hand. "A lesson.""A lesson?""You asked me why this painting was my favorite. I was only answering you." He rubs his jaw. "You seemed to be enjoying it well enough.""You too," I counter, but honestly he doesn't look half as flustered as I feel. How the fuck did he manage that? I know he wants me too, that he was aroused by the way I let him touch me."Is this some sort of sick game?""Not at all," he says, leaning toward me again and dropping his voice. "I only wanted you to realize h
- CALDER -I wait until both Lily and the baby are asleep before I decide to sneak out. As much as I want to sit here with her in my arms forever, our conversation about her mother reminded me of a call I need to make.I look down at her before I leave. Her brown hair is in a messy bun on her head, and she doesn't have a stitch of makeup on, but I don't think I've ever seen her look so beautiful. I lean over and press a kiss against her forehead as I lift our sleeping son out of her arms.He's so tiny that I'm afraid I'll break him. But even though he was born a little early, the doctor told us he's perfectly healthy - and after hearing him scream this morning, I'm tempted to believe him. This little guy has quite a pair of lungs on him.I settle him gently in the bed the nurse wheeled in for him. I can see so much of Lily in him - and so much of myself. I knew I would love my son, but the intensity of my feelings is startling. When I think of how close I came to losing both of the
- LILY – Two Days LaterThey won't tell me what happened.I remember the pain. The screaming. The fear.I remember hearing the first, sweet cry from my son's throat.I remember the miracle of Calder's voice, the proof that he was alive.But after that, there's only darkness.I woke up yesterday morning in the hospital. Calder tells me they were able to get an air ambulance out to us at the estate, but he won't give me any more details than that about what happened two nights ago after he made it to the house. And there's a desperate, hollow look in his eyes when I ask, so I don't press him for details.Honestly? I'm not sure I want to know.And truthfully, it doesn't matter. Calder is alive. I'm alive. And our son is here. So much has happened in the past couple of days, and none of it feels real.I look down at the tiny little human in my arms. He's perfect. Even though he arrived a couple of weeks before his due date, he's still round and healthy. He emerged with a thick cro
- LOUISA -Just stay calm.Just stay calm.Just stay calm.It doesn't matter how many times I say it to myself - it gets harder with every passing second. I spend almost twenty minutes searching for my cell phone in the rain, but I can't find it anywhere. It's not in the car. It's not on the driveway. It's just gone. Finally, I force myself to give up the search and return to check on Lily - and I'm not a moment too soon.If I had any hope that we might make it through the night without this baby - after all, I was in labor for nineteen hours - it's fading fast. After five minutes at Lily's side, it's clear that her little one has no intention of waiting for help to arrive, and she seems to know it, too. Even if I thought I still had a chance of finding my cell phone, I can't leave Lily now.Both Ward and Calder are still out there somewhere. It's just me and Lily - and a whimpering Ramona, who's still clearly confused and terrified. I long to go over to my daughter, to pick her
- LOUISA -Lily's face has gone white."Calder?" she says into the phone, her voice cracking. "Calder! Calder, answer me!" Her hand visibly shakes as she pulls the phone away from her ear."What's going on?" I ask her, running over and shifting Ramona in my arms. I've just managed to get my little girl to stop crying. "What happened?"She doesn't answer. Instead she hits a couple of buttons on the screen, presumably calling him again. I glance over at Ward, but he looks just as shocked and confused as I feel.After a moment, Lily drops the phone, her eyes wide with horror."What happened?" I ask again, my stomach sinking further with every passing second. Something is wrong. Something is desperately wrong. Ramona starts to whimper in my arms."Lily," Ward says firmly. "You have to tell us what's happening."Lily glances up, blinking, as if she's suddenly remembered she's not alone."Something happened," she whispers. "Something happened to Calder."She's in shock, that much i
- CALDER -Lily is in labor. Lily is in labor.That thought drives out everything else - even the raw, gnawing feeling in my gut when I think about what Michelle has done - and suddenly nothing matters but getting to my wife.If I was a madman on the road before, it's nothing to how I drive now. I don't care about the rain or the traffic. I don't care if a cop chases me down for driving twice the speed limit. I'm getting to that hospital. Getting to my wife.I should have been there, I think. I should have been by her side when this started. But though the guilt eats away at me, I can't think about that now. I have one concern and one concern only - getting to her. Being with her as soon as humanly possible. Holding her hand as the pain comes. Even over the phone, I could hear the fear in her voice.I need to be with her.And if I have to kill myself to get to her, I will.. . . . .- WARD -Keep it together, man. They're counting on you.I hate that I have to remind myself o
- LOUISA -It might be storming outside, but I'm determined to make today a little brighter."I have a surprise for you," I tell Ward.It took me half an hour to find him after I put Ramona down for her afternoon nap. Even though I've insisted that he take a break from his restoration projects, Ward has continued to work, and I find him retouching the paint in a bedroom in the eastern wing. He's currently perched on a ladder with a paintbrush in his hand.When he grins down at me, I know he couldn't be happier to see me."What sort of surprise?" he asks, and his expression makes my heart skip a beat. He climbs down the ladder and stands in front of me.I drink him in as he wipes the back of his hand across his forehead. His T-shirt has streaks of paint on it, and there's a new hole in his jeans, but somehow all of it works together to make him look irresistibly yummy. Something wells up inside of me as I admire him - and the way he's looking at me right now brings the blood rushi
- CALDER -Less than two hours later, Michelle and I are in Barberville and I've got her set up at a modest little extended stay hotel just outside of downtown. I've prepaid for a two-week stay, and after that, I'll reassess the situation and figure out the best course of action. Michelle told Lily that she was looking for a job in the area, but since learning the truth about her health, I'm not sure whether that was an empty claim or not. Either way, though, now is not the time to be making any rash decisions. Lily comes first. We'll deal with Michelle after the baby is here.I'm getting ready to leave when a thought occurs to me."Lily will have lots of questions when she learns the truth. And she'll want you to start treatment as soon as possible."She starts to protest. "I still don't think I want treatment - ""At the very least, will you go talk to a doctor here in town? Explore your options? I'll pay for your visit, of course."She hesitates, then nods. "All right."I tur
- LOUISA -I'm in the office on the south side of the house, working out some of the final details of my surprise honeymoon trip for Ward, when Calder stalks into the room."Good morning," I say - though you'd hardly know it was morning, considering how overcast it is outside today. When I glance up and see his face, my fingers freeze on the computer keyboard. "What's wrong? Is it Lily?"We had a bit of a scare yesterday, what with Lily getting rushed to the hospital. She'll be on bed rest for the duration of her term, but both mother and baby are healthy - or so I thought. Calder looks like he's hardly slept. There are dark circles under his eyes, and he seems agitated."We need to figure out what Lily's mother wants," Calder says, jerking a hand through his hair. "It's that woman's fault that Lily is in this state."I lean back in my chair and glance over at Ramona. She's in her playpen over by the window, and she's pulled herself up onto her feet so that she can watch her uncle
- CALDER -That was too close.My jaw hurts from clenching. My mind won't slow down. I've been pacing the same spot on the floor for so long that I'm surprised I haven't worn a hole into the boards.It was only a false alarm, I remind myself. Lily is fine - for now - and the doctor said she was only having Braxton-Hicks contractions, probably made worse by stress. But even though she's now safe in our bed, I still can't seem to make myself calm down. When it comes time for the real thing... I don't even want to think about it."There's no need to be so worked up," Lily tells me. "Everything is fine. Come to bed.""Everything is not all right," I say. "Your mother upset you so much that you - ""It was my dad's fault, too," she says. "And it was a false alarm. I'm all right. No harm done.""Maybe not this time, but I'm not willing to take that chance again." I resume my pacing. "That woman needs to go.""I agree," she says. "And she's already looking for a place. But in the mean