Chapter 7

_Leslie’s Pov_

As I lay on the ground, my heart pumping as fast as it could, and my skin slick with sweat, all I could think about was the sheer bliss of the sex we'd just had. Every other thought, every nagging doubt, every wound from our troubled past, melted away. For a moment, I was transported back to a time when our love was new, and our hearts were full of hope and promise.

I forgot about the pain he had caused me, the tears I cried, the sleepless nights I endured, wondering if I would ever be free of him. All I could think about was the way he touched me, the way he made me feel. It was like no time had passed at all, like we were never been apart.

For a moment, I let myself believe that I was in love with him again, that all the heartache and anger had been washed away by the sheer force of our desire for each other. It was a fragile feeling, but it was there, a spark of hope that refused to die.

But I knew I couldn't stay in this moment forever. Reality would intrude, eventually, and I would have to confront the demons of our past once more. I had to snap out of it, remind myself of what I really wanted. And what I wanted was revenge, not love. I wanted to make him pay for everything he'd done to me.

But how? After what we just shared, could I really think straight again? My heart was still reeling from the intensity of our passion, my body still shaking with the aftershocks. I always knew I loved Nathan, no matter what happened, my heart always called for him.

I tried to shake off the feeling, telling myself it was just lust. But deep down, I knew it was more than that. I knew I still had feelings for him, feelings I couldn't ignore.

"No, no, no," I muttered to myself, trying to get my emotions under control. I picked up my underwear from the ground and started getting dressed, my hands shaking slightly as I tried to fasten the buttons.

I wanted to play it cool, act like I only wanted the sex, but that was a lie. My body wanted more of him, craved his touch, his kiss, his love. But I couldn't let myself give in to those feelings, not now, not ever.

"I would like to leave now, Nathan," I said, trying to sound calm, but my voice trembled slightly. "And mind you, this was a mistake, and it should never repeat itself again." My heart ached as I made that last statement, knowing it was a lie. All I wanted, all I could think of, was him doing it again, and again, and again.

Nathan looked at me, his eyes filled with a deep sadness, a longing that made my heart skip a beat. "Are you sure, Les?" he asked, his voice low, husky.

I could see the desire in his eyes, the way he looked at me, and I knew I had to get out of there, fast. If I stayed, I'd be tempted to give in to my feelings, to let him take me again, to lose myself in his arms.

I nodded, trying to sound firm, but my voice was barely above a whisper. "Yes, I'm sure."

I turned to leave, but Nathan's voice stopped me. "Les, wait."

I turned back, my heart racing, my body trembling with anticipation. But I knew I couldn't stay, couldn't let myself get pulled back into his orbit.

"I have to go," I said, my voice firm, but my heart heavy with emotion.

And with that, I turned and walked away, leaving Nathan standing there, looking at me with a mixture of sadness and longing.

I got home that evening tired, sad and angry - not just at Nathan, but at myself. How could I have let my guard down and give in to my desires, but all I could think of was him. How happy I was with his touch, his kiss, his love, and the way he swayed his hips. I have craved him for so long and today I could no longer resist him. Deep down I knew I was happy with what transpired between us. I got butterflies in my stomach again and I enjoyed every moment of my heart skipping a beat when he looked at me. But should I give in?. After everything, to be honest I don’t even know why he is doing all this to get to me. He was the same person who gave me the divorce papers and slept with my bestfriend. I think he just wants to put me through more pain but it won’t work. I have to stand my ground and defend myself and my son because I can’t let history repeat itself.

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Days turned to weeks as I waited for his return. I knew it was wrong. It felt so bad to crave someone the way I craved him, he was my ex for heaven’s sake but I did with so much intensity. All I wanted was to see him again but there was no sign of Nathan. I had waited for weeks wondering what was going on. I even got scared. Yes I hated him but I didn’t want him to die, he was the father of my son and the man I loved. I had to snap out of it. I knew I would see him soon.

I remained seated close to my window when I noticed a figure by the garden gate. I quickly looked at the security camera in that angle and discovered it was Nathan. I was so happy that I jumped out of my seat with so much joy but, I knew I had to play it cool. I couldn’t let him know how much I missed him.

I walked up to the garden gate and there he was with a sad longing look on his face. I couldn’t help but wonder what had troubled him but I had to act turf.

“What do you want today, Nathan?.” I said with a high pitched voice that lacked any real bark. I was trying to sound nonchalant but I don’t think it was working.

“I’m really sorry Les,” Nathan said with a low voice. His eyes filled with deep sadness. “There’s been some issues at Greystone and I have to go back. The park needs me.”

Nathan turned to look at me, his eyes searching for something. A low sigh came from him as he voiced out. “I truly don’t want to leave you till you forgive me but I really need to help the park.”

“Ok” I said with a straight face but deep down it hurt so much. I felt so sad and disappointed, Not knowing the next time I would see him but I knew I had to be strong.

“I’ll be back soon Les, I promise” with his low, husky voice.

I looked up and said to him while trying to hold my tears. “I don’t care Nathan.” I said, trying to sound cold. “You could die for all I care.” With that I walked away.

Nathan looked at me, his eyes filled with pain.

And for a moment, I felt a pang of regret.

Maybe I'd been too harsh, too cruel. But I knew I had to be strong. i had to protect myself.

I turned and walked away, leaving Nathan standing by the gate. I knew I'd hurt him, but l didn't care. Or at least, I tried not to care. As I walked back to my office, I couldn't help but feel a sense of emptiness. I pushed Nathan away, and now he was gone. Again.

I ran to the window, looking out at the garden.

And there he was, standing in the same spot. I think he was processing what l said, trying to make sense of it all. But within a few minutes, he was gone.

And I was left standing there, feeling empty and alone. Wondering if l made a mistake, wondering if l would ever see Nathan again.