4.

I wait for Dilora to defend because there is no way in hell the Dilora I knew in high school would let anybody try to humiliate her. Imagine my surprise when she doesn’t do as I expect.

Instead, Dilora sits quietly with her gaze on the ground and doesn’t utter another word. Hani and I exchange surprise glances. I guess we shared the same thoughts.

This is not the outspoken Dilora I knew back in high school. Was she serious when she said she had changed? Did this new version of her somehow lose the ability to defend herself?

Was she going to let Brielle paint her as an easy target for the people in this hall? I make up my mind to defend her just this once when Hani speaks up.

“Funny how you keep picking on everyone, do you feel threatened? Is that why you need to pick on people to feel better about yourself and your last season shoes?”  Hani snarls and Brielle's eyes widen in shock.

“They aren’t last season. I just got them” she sputters but Hani scoffs.

“Darling, they are totally last season. I would know. Those are my mom’s designs” She smirks triumphantly and gives a high-five to Harvey behind my back.

The crowd boos her and her minions and she has no other option but to stomp away angrily, making me breathe out in relief. The class turns their attention away from us now that the fun is over.

“Are you okay?” Harvey asks me quietly, leaning over to speak quietly.

“What? I’m fine” I attempt to smile but it comes out shaky.

“You should hide that.” He smiles sympathetically before pointing at my hands. I follow his direction and see mine trembling on the table.

“It's not that...” I try to explain that I am not scared but he just smiles at me.

“Trust me, I understand more than anything” He gives me a sad smile. He leans back before I can ask him what he meant and goes back to tapping his phone.

I remove my hands from the table and clench them together on my lap. There is a strong urge to look around and see if anyone can see me trying not to fall apart.

“That was intense?” Hani chuckles.

“I know right? Who still bullies anyone in college?” Harvey scoffs and they begin talking about it.

Unable to stop myself, my gaze finds Kian and his eyes are already on me, watching me with clouded and knowing eyes.  Despite the earlier warnings, I can’t bring myself to snap away from his gaze.

For a moment, it’s just the two of us in the hall as the other student fades away. His eyes watch me with intention as if they are mocking me, calling me out on my lies.

The intent behind his glare makes me shiver with awareness and I feel the strong urge to wrap my hands around myself so I could shield my walls from his prying eyes.

The terrifying thought that there is a possibility that he can read me like an open book scares me and makes me want to run out of the hall. I hate it but I can’t look away.

Something sinister tells me he knows that all of this is just for show but I will never allow him to prove himself right.

“Hey” Hani tugs on my arm softly causing me to break the stare down I am having with him.

“That was intense” she says again making me raise my brows in confusion when I see Dilora and Harvey staring at me with concern in their eyes.

“What do you mean?” I ask.

“The staring contest with Kian. Everyone was watching you and Kian. It felt like we were intruders in your space” Dilora whispers harshly.

“I wasn't looking at him” I try to deny weakly but they throw me a ‘are you fucking joking’ look and I sigh in resignation.

“Lora, you can't” Hani whines softly.

“I won't and don't call me Lora. She is” I point at Dilora because that's what she was called in school.

“Fine. But stay away from him. We literally warned you just now” Harvey chuckles.

“It's not funny” Dilora glares at him.

“Sorry, sorry” He raises his arms in mock surrender.

“Guys, drop it before I get mad.  I've heard you already” I tell them because I hate feeling like I didn't know any better and that's exactly how they were making me feel with the constant warnings.

The professor for the course walks in and the entire class stops chatting to pay attention to him.

My heart constricts in her chest and my palm clutched the hem of my dress while everyone paid attention.

Breathe in

Breathe out

Take it easy

Nice and calm

I'm helping now, so it's not like I only antagonize you

The familiar voice in my head snarls, breaking out of the prison I thought I trapped it in for the day.

I'm the only one allowed to make you suffer

You better calm the fuck down Alora

I thought you said you weren't pitiful

What's all this now?

Don't be such a coward

The voice turns punishing and I dig my nails into my lap, desperate to get rid of it, needing the pain to drag me out before the whispers pull me under.

You're only showing them by hurting yourself

They can see your lap. Your gown isn't very long.

It warns and I rip my hands away from my skin and drag my dress to cover the cut my nails caused already. My hands tingle, desperate to hurt something or claw something so I pull out the pop socket in my bag to get my hands busy.

Dilora throws me a curious stare but she doesn't comment and resumes paying attention to the professor while I click furiously at the silent object in my palms.

I turn my attention to the man in front and try to pay attention to him, hoping it will take my mind off what I wanted to do and off the person still staring at me.