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Chapter 15
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2024-10-29 19:42:5615. Aira
Tired was only an understatement. I was out of all energy, completely drained. I wondered how was I even sitting anymore?
My back gnawed terribly that it had almost jammed. I felt cold and the henna made it worse.
My eyes had already dried out and the heart ache had become numb.
In simple terms, I was physically and mentally done for the day.
I felt nothing no more and I didn't even know what I wanted. I was just restless, exhausted and a little hu
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21. Flashback"You have no clue Aunty.." I shook my head, slipping into a more lazy position. "He troubles me so much during Ramadan." I complained, staring at Asher through the rear view mirror.He chuckled at my accusation as if I was a child crying about her silly friend." I know beta.." She jabbered, turning back to me, her face showing how much she had to speak on the topic."Which is why I'm so grateful to have you. I'm okay in Ramadan because I know, you are with my dork." She smiled at me sweetly." Ab aisa bhi nahi hai Ammi, mere bilkul nakhre nahi hain?" Asher piped in, stealing a glance at me.It made my heart flutter. His gaze always did. The way he looked at me in the crowd, secretively yet so intensely as if he could see my soul made me feel butterflies." Yeah, ofco
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23. AiraThe air was colder than what I had ever felt with a silence that screamed of our heart-break, our melancholy.I stared at the thin fabric of the grey sweater I was wearing. I had to wear it because Asher wasn't there to make me feel warm all day.I realised I had to start wearing woollens myself because Asher was no longer gonna be there to take care of my antiques.Life was changing rapidly. With every breath of mine, I was losing more of Asher, I was breaking more than before and I was morphing more into nothingness.My hands were filled with bangles, red and white. They symbolised the new beginning I was going to have with Virat from tomorrow but I wondered how it would be without me?I was no more Aira, I was no more myself. I was lost and I had no chase of it.I had no clue if I cou
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I cuddled a little more with myself as a cold, fresh gush of wind ran across me.I gazed at the river, rippling and hitting against its bank, quiet and lost.I wasn't upset anymore, the anger had dissolved, the tears had dried up but I was still far from peace and comfort.A part of my heart felt torn and rusted but there was no one I could certainly blame other than my own self.It was sad how he had been behaving lately, so rude and changed and how he had to lie for her and not meet me but her but it all came like a lesson to me.It seemed it was my deeds returning to me, some karma doing it's part, making me go through the sufferings I inflicted upon him, punishing me and washing my sins.I felt so dirty, mean and s
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"I hate you too." I scrunched my eyes, immediately regretting the words profusely."Aira?" I quietly whispered, turning around but she had walked a distance and it didn't seem she would look back any soon.I felt like a douchebag, a piece of shit for having behaved so impulsively, for having hurt her for something so trivial and so insignificant.I wanted to stop her and apologise instantly but I could gather no courage to peer into her hurt eyes or to hear her accusing tone or to talk to her at all."Virat?"I threw her hand away from mine."Virat I'm?"
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"Hello?" I greeted him and a smiled broke through his tired face."Hey." He groggily replied, giving me a side hug. "Didn't sleep?""Nah." I wrapped the shawl around myself more properly. "Couldn't without you. Was reading.""I don't want my kid to be a nerd." He chuckled lightly as I followed him upstairs into the bedroom."Reading is so much more than what you think of it." I took out clothes for him as he freshened up. "How was the dinner by the way?""Good." He replied briefly, changing his shirt.
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I took the support of the wall to stand still, its ice-cold surface giving me goosebumps.I inhaled and exhaled heavily, calming my nerves. My eyes were barely open but still I could spot Virat stand in front of me with a scowl and a confused expression on his face.He was always all comfortable taking care of me at all times during the day but he hated my midnight problems." Are you?" I cut him off, pushing him away and retching one more time into the commode. I heaved, an exasperated grunt escaping my lips.
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I still dream that I'd wake up, with you in my arms and all of this being nothing but a nightmare.I still wish it to happen somehow, with any magic or miracle it requires. I swear I'd give my everything to wake up like that. I had no clue where we fell weak Aira. I still couldn't believe that our love wasn't enough for us?How could our families be so cruel and selfish Aira?
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I was fully aware that I was lost and numb.I only hoped that the people around weren't talking about anything that involved my participation or at least required it.The only thing that occupied me was how my head spun, how hot my skin was and how I felt giddy and empty in my stomach."It was heck of a money, isn't it Aira?" George burst my bubble, pronouncing my name incorrectly as usual." Yeah." I feigned a chuckle not even bothering to know what deal they were discussing about.It was lunch and I was in my manager's room along with a few other colleagues of mine.I had no clue how I had come here after attending a hectic meeting on all my own because right now I didn't even have the power to listen or speak up
