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Chapter 40- The meet up
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2021-08-21 03:39:40Related chapters
Her deepest desire Chapter 41 - In the silence
It was nice seeing you with your friends” I say to him when we finally catch our breath after a 4th round of amazing sex. “I’m glad you finally met them, I’ve wanted to introduce you to them for a while now,” he says closing his eyes. “I’m glad too,” I say touching his brow. He opens his eyes and looks at me. “Will you ever say it when we’re not making love?” he asks and I look at him confused. “Say what?” “I love you” he says suddenly and my heart skips a beat. I say that when we make love? Do I? I don’t remember. “Uhm… I don’t…” I start to say and then stop. “I know you love me, you say it all the time. I only long to hear you say it when you're not high from endorphins. And please don’t take this as me pressuring you into saying anything you don’t want to” he says and waits for me to say something. I slowly work through my thoughts. I know I love him but actually saying the words is a lot for me. It’s not something I take lightly and it’s not something I’ve said to a guy. “
Last Updated : 2021-08-21Her deepest desire Chapter 42 - Reach out
It’s late afternoon on Friday and Gabriel and I are in the back of his car on our way to Limpopo. David is driving because we’re both too tired. it’s been a long and tiring week. We’re having dinner with my parents for the first time as a couple. I don’t know how they’re going to take it but I guess it won’t be that bad since they gave us the invite. I’m nervous, Gabriel on the other hand is very excited. He’s sure it will go well. He’s an optimistic and I am a pessimist. I see disaster, but he’s been so supportive and understanding through all of this. I look over to his side and find him staring at me. He raises his brows at me and I smile. He knows I’m nervous and he’s giving me the space to feel everything out. I appreciate the moments he just lets me be. He doesn’t try to force his optimism on me, he lets me go through the motions on my own. He reaches out and takes my hand in his, then he kisses the inside of my hand. His way of letting me know he’s here for me. I absorb his l
Last Updated : 2021-09-01Her deepest desire Chapter 43 - Turning Point
“How are you feeling?” My father asks me when I find him sitting in the garden. “I feel… less stressed” I say honestly, this whole situation with Zan and Gabriel has me in knots. And today having dinner with my parents has made me feel better. But being home today makes me think of Zan, I’m happy but I wish we were talking. Now that I am building a life with Gabriel I long to rebuild my relationship with Zan. But how do I do that when he’s so mad at me? “I can tell…” My father says looking thoughtful. “I thought you and mom were mad at me for dating Gabriel” I say looking away from my father, if Zan is this mad how can my parents not be furious? “We figured, since you were ignoring our calls” he says looking a little sad. “I’m sorry” I say feeling guilty. “It’s okay, we’re figuring everything out. That’s why I need to tell you something.” He says and looks serious suddenly. My heart skips a beat, why does he look stressed? “Dad what is it?” I ask impatient. “I… told Zan about
Last Updated : 2021-09-02Her deepest desire Chapter 44 - Experience
Rose and I look at Gabriel and my niece and nephew play in awe. From the moment Gabriel got here the kids took all his attention. They have been playing tag for the past 30 minutes. Rose looks at me with dreamy eyes. “He’s amazing with kids, the two of you should definitely have one,” she says smiling, I look at her like she’s crazy and go back to looking at Gabriel and the kids. He runs and falls backwards on the lawn pretending to be completely exhausted. My niece and nephew burst out in laughter, falling on top of him. “Got you, got you” they scream out loud, Gabriel laughs out loud too. He sits up and looks at me this look of pure joy in his eyes. He stands up and comes to sit with Rose and me in the Garden chairs. I hand him a drink when he sits next to me. He beams at me and then downs the drink. Rose tells the kids to go play in the house and they grudgingly do as she says. They sadly wave at Gabriel as they go. “ I think they’re in love with you,” she says waving at them t
Last Updated : 2021-09-03Her deepest desire Chapter 45 - Down time
I look out at the view from Gabriel’s bedroom window. He picked me up from my parent’s house a few hours after my conversation with my mother and sister. It’s early evening now and the sunset in front of me is breathtaking. My mother’s question is still reeling in my mind. Am I ready to tie my life with Gabriel? The truth is every minute I spend with him is incredible, he makes me think about my life and life plans more than any other person has. When I think of life beyond tomorrow I think of spending it with him. He has gotten under my skin in a way I never imagined a man would. “A penny for your thoughts?” Gabriel asks when he walks into his bedroom. He sits next to me on the bed facing the same view. I smile and turn to look at him, he does the same. “I was just thinking about what Rose said,” I say deciding to start the conversation from the start, she’s the one that brought up all the talk about kids and marriage.“About having a baby”. “You want to have a baby?” he says asking
Last Updated : 2021-09-04Her deepest desire Chapter 46 - "Argus"
8 months later “What are your plans for today?” Ryan asks me from across the table. We’re almost done with breakfast; she has to leave for work soon. Today is Monday so that means she won’t sleep over tonight. She has to go home after work and get fresh clothes and toiletries for the week. I have been trying to convince her to move in with me for the past month and let’s just say I am failing miserably. She needs her own space she says. My mind drifts to the day we met. I still can’t believe it’s been almost since that fateful day Ryan and I met in that office park. She has taken my breath away ever since. “Gabe?” she says when I don’t answer. She shrugs in question. “I have a long day of work and boring stuff.” I say finally and smile. She’s looking at me askance,, she can tell something is off. And she’s right something is off. But I can’t tell her that. “You okay?” She says standing from her chair and she walks to me. I push my chair back so she can sit on my lap. She ki
Last Updated : 2021-09-05Her deepest desire Chapter 47 - Crossroads
“Ryan, say something,” Gabriel says after a moment. My head is spinning, I feel like vomiting but I don’t think I have enough strength to do it. I look at him confused. Ramie is dead? What is going on? How can she be dead? I thought Zan was on this, I thought he was some kind of spy organization member. I haven’t heard from her in a long time. I guess I got so comfortable with Gabriel that I forgot about everything. But I didn’t think she was dead, I assumed she just... I don’t even know what I thought. “Baby?” Gabriel says and takes a step toward me. I raise my hand up to stop him from touching me. I take a step back, he stops moving and looks at my hand; he swallows hard and balls his fists. He thinks I’m rejecting him. His face looks so hurt. I feel so confused, it’s like Ramie and I were close, but I feel like I lost something. Maybe I was naive thinking everything will be fine. Or did I turn a blind eye to her plight? “I need a minute,” I say to soften the blow of the moment
Last Updated : 2021-09-06Her deepest desire Chapter 48 - Reflection
It’s been 3 days since Gabe and I left Gauteng. We’re in the mountains of the Blyde Canyon. Gabriel has an incredible house here. It’s the two of us in the middle of a forest basically, there’s no cleaning or cooking staff just us and the mountains and River. The house is built on the edge of a mountain, all I need to do is look up and I can see the famous 3 Rondavels in their glory. I am so blessed to be here in this incredible place but I wish we were here under better circumstances. Not on the run from a psycho member of parliament. This all seems so unreal, to say I’m going crazy is an understatement. Every morning I wake up and come to this beautiful balcony and watch the world come alive. From here I can see the Blyde River. If I look hard enough I can see Hippos swimming, birds fishing for their breakfast. I see the beauty that is in front of me but all I feel is dread, anger, fear, confusion, and… In a nutshell, I’m furious. Ramie got me into this mess and now she’s dead le
Last Updated : 2021-09-07
Latest chapter
Her deepest desire Chapter 60 - Pure bliss
One year later “Gabriel what do you have planned tonight?” I ask my husband when he leads me into the garden in my pyjamas. It’s a Friday night and in our household, it means an adventure is due. We work hard during the week so that we can take time out on the weekends and have fun. We’ve been having these epic weekends since the day we got married. Gabriel and I have taking turns planning incredible dates. It can be a weekend long affair or just one night. As long as we show the love we have for each other; we have created so many memories together. It feesl like I’m living s dream. Gabriel is the ultimate romantic, he comes up with these incredible and thoughtful dates. I’m good at planning a great night but this man takes my breath away every time. Sometimes it’s not even about what we do, he has a knack for knowing what I need at the right moment. “I thought we would have a simple night in. I heard that tonight would be a good night to stargaze.” He says leading me into the gar
Her deepest desire Chapter 59 - For Life
“Ryan baby, wake up.” Gabriel says kissing me. I slowly come out of sleep. I blink looking at him confused. He’s sitting next to me on the bed. He’s fully dressed in sweats and t-shirt. Why isn’t he naked? We went to sleep butt naked last night.“What time is it?”I ask looking out the window, it’s still dark. Am I missing something? Today is Sunday, we have nowhere to go. So why do we need to wake up early?“5:59.” He says touching my face softly. I lean into his touch closing my eyes, feeling sleep come back slowly. I don’t want to get out of bed, it’s so comfortable here.“I want to show you something.” He says and I groan. Can’t it wait? I don’t want to go anywhere.“Right now?” I ask and he chuckles softly, I open my eyes looking at him. He’s not budging; he really wants me to get out of bed. I sit up slowly and stretch. He looks at my nak
Her deepest desire Chapter 58 - A tide
Johannesburg “You look incredible.” Says to me as we walk into a dinner party hosted at the Levelthree in Joburg. He asked me to be his plus one tonight and I had to come through for my man. It’s a networking event for South Africa’s most rich and influential. The event is hosted by one of Gabriel’s friend a young business woman named Maite, she owns one of the biggest beauty brands in South Africa.I am obsessed with her, she has one of the most incredible minds. She started her beauty business out of her university dorm and now she is one of the richest women in Africa. My mind is blown being here; I am doing my best to contain my excitement. Maite is legendary and I feel so grateful for Gabriel, he’s the reason I’m here.On a normal day I could have gotten a ticket to get in here and interact with the people here at arm’s length but being here with him is so much
Her deepest desire Chapter - 57 Blended
I spent the whole morning with Gabriel’s parents. His father gave me a tour of the whole farm; we spent the morning going through his daily chores. Gabriel had a full day of work so I had to do my own thing today. His dad was more than happy to spend the day with me. I got to see what it really takes to run a fully functioning farm.It’s amazing to see where Gabriel gets his work ethic. They both love what they do, they treat their employees with so much respect and they are always so eager to share information with others. I enjoyed my time with him, he’s a cool dude.Now I’m making lunch with his mom. She’s her husband’s complete opposite, where he’s talkative and smiley. She’s quiet and reserved. Now that I spent more than a few hours with his parents I can tell Gabriel us the perfect blend of the two of them. He took his father’s work ethic and commanding presence and his mother’s calm. &ldqu
Her deepest desire Chapter 56 - No worries
It’s late evening; I’m with my parents in the kitchen. My father is washing the dishes, I’m drying and my mother is putting them away. Washing the dishes is my least favourite thing to do. I should really call Gabriel tonight, I miss him. I think it’s time I went back home. I can’t spend another week without him. I’m sure he misses me too. “I have a special delivery.” Zan says when he walks into my parent’s kitchen. My parents and I turn around to look at him. He’s been gone since morning, I did wonder if he would come home tonight. He’s well known for his disappearing acts. I was worried he left without saying goodbye. I have fears that he’ll leave home and I won’t see him again. Our new found understanding is fairly new so I worry that as soon as we go back tour normal lives we’ll fall back to old habits. I know I have to be patient and trust that we can work this whole thing out but I get scared sometimes. He’s my brother and I love him. He moves away from the doorway and loo
Her deepest desire Chapter 55 - Brotherhood
“This place is amazing.” Zan says looking out at the view in front of us. We’re in my parent’s backyard, looking at my father’s berry field. He hasn’t been here in a long time; I first brought him here when I bought the property. It was just a field then; now it’s a fully functioning farm. He’s seeing this view for the first time; I’ve seen it so many times. But seeing the look of awe on his face makes me see appreciate it more. It’s breath taking. It really is.” I say realizing that it’s so easy to take things for granted. I realize I took our friendship for granted once. Knowing that it’s on the line right now makes me rethink everything I have in my life. When he called me a week ago to say he’s coming back home and we should meet, I was happy. This is a chance to mend broken trust. I don’t know if he’ll be open to that but when I saw him drive up today he seemed different, even now standing next to him he seems resigned. I could be jumping the gun here but I have to be hopeful.
Her deepest desire Chapter 54 - Family
“Hey kid.” I hear someone say and turn around. Zan is standing in my bedroom doorway. I close my eyes and open them again, to make sure I’m not hallucinating; I stand up from my bed and take a deep breath and then let it out.“Hey.” I say and walk to my brother. I go in for a hug and we just hold each other for what feels like a long time. I can’t believe he’s here, I pour all my love into my hug.“Did you miss me?” He asks when I finally let him go. Tears run down my face uncontrollably. I nod and wipe them away but fail. There’s just so much emotion that my hands can’t keep up with the constant flow of water down my face. “I missed you too.” He says hugging me again. “It feels so good to see you alive and well.”He says his voice thick with emotion.“It feels so good to see you too.” I say so glad we’re talking. I was so worried about him. I didn’t
Her deepest desire Chapter 53 - A new chapter
“I just want to say that I will miss you. I can’t imagine this office running without you but I’m so happy that you’re going out there to experience something new. I wish you all the best in your new endeavors. And just so you know, if you ever want your job back. T’s always here.” Max says at my farewell party. My two-week notice is over, I’m happy about this chapter of my life. But I can’t say I’m not terrified of what’s to come next. This is me taking a leap into the unknown. Who quits a job without a plan? I don’t know how I’m going to make money when I leave here. I am shaking in my boots but I’m up for it. This is by far the craziest thing I’ve done, ever! The whole room cheers for me and I smile shyly. I have to be the centre of attention but Max insisted we host a party for my last day here. I walk around the room thanking everyone. It’s only right that I say my proper goodbyes; I worked with these people for a long time. “Thank you for everything Max, I truly appreciate yo
Her deepest desire Chapter 52 -Rethink
Life is different, I feel different. The things I found joy in a few months ago don’t make me happy anymore. I used to love going to work; being of service to my boss would give me this sense of belonging. But now I just go through the motions of my work days and forget about it as soon as I get home. I look forward to the end of the day as soon as I get to work. There is a shift in my heart. I know it and I find myself accepting it without fear or question I never imagined I would be those people who dread going to work. I love my job, or more accurately I loved my job. Max is an amazing boss, our office is fun but I can’t seem to get back into my groove. I shake the feeling that I need to let go of this life and something greater will come to me. At first, I thought it was the stress. I told myself it will go away in a few weeks once everything settled down. I thought it was the moment and as soon as it passed I would go back to me. It’s been a month and the feeling hasn’t changed
