AFTER ARRANGING our things in each of our rooms, all six of us decided to take a walk along the coastline of Lingayen, Pangasinan. It was near lunchtime, and so we let Lachlan and Katlego do the honor in ordering. Hindi pa bumababa si Shanta. Before I joined them, I knocked on her door a while ago. But she wasn't answering. I chatted with her, but it was all ignored. I didn't know what exactly was bothering her. Pero alam kong masama ang loob niya.Well, I failed to medicate her with fruitful vitamins. Baka nangangayayat siya sa kwarto niya dahil hindi ko siya nahalikan. And it was all thanks to her meddlesome cousin. Hindi natuloy ang pagpapakain ko sa kanya ng bitamina.Habang nag-oorder sina Lach at Kat ng kakainin, kaming apat nina Clavis, Jirario, at Euart ang naglakad-lakad sa dalampasigan. As we buried our feet in the white sand, it was like a foot spa. Although it's already May, there was something in the breeze that made it cool an
THE BEACH RESORT was located somewhere in the North that's hidden in the public, but was known by everybody else. Sa sobrang tago ng lugar, halos hindi na ito matuldukan sa mapa ng Pilipinas.I thought we were somewhere part in the land of Lingayen. But I realized the digital map was pertaining to the gulf. Parte ang islang ito sa mas tuktok na bahagi ng Lingayen gulf. In its northern part, different islands and beaches that are too tiny to be located in a digimap compromised it.This was how unique the islands were. Parang ang pagmamahal ko kay Shanta. I had kept my love for her like these secluded islands. She never knew how vibrant and lively the islands were till she explored its innate glory.Marami pang nakatagong yaman mula rito. At araw-araw na kasama niya ako ay isang palaisipan. Sasaya, iiyak, tatawa, at malulungkot siya sa anumang madidiskubre niya. It's the island that would bring out the best of her emotions. At a
Chapter 148AS EXPECTED, the secluded island was small. Kung ikukumpara sa unang islang binisita namin, kalahati lang ang lawak nito. More so, the other part of this island was covered by rock formations and a sloping forest."Where exactly are we going?" tanong ko kay Shanta habang umaakyat kami sa malalaking bato. "Do you really know what's in this island?""Ipupunta ba kita dito kung hindi ko alam?" hingal na sagot niya.Kumakapit siya sa isang bato habang isinasampa ang paa sa isa pang bato. Mukhang delikado ang ginagawa niya kaya tumalon ako sa kanyang paanan."Shouldn't we continue, hmm?" I called out. "It's five in the afternoon. Baka maabutan tayo ng high tide. This island is so small.""Hindi aabot 'yong tubig dito.""Are you sure? This island isn't familiar to me. Haven't you noticed the boatmen's expression?""Hindi naman. Bakit? Ano bang nakita mo?" tanong niya
SHANTA AND I spent the night together in an underwater cave beside a trickling bonfire. Kinaumagahan niyon habang naghahanap ng pagkain sa maliit na gubat, tinawag ako ni Shanta para pumunta sa dalampasigan."What happened?!" I shouted as I scurried down the rock formations. "May problema ba?""May barko!" hiyaw ni Shanta at hinala ang mga kamay ko. "Kumaway ka, dali! Kaway ka!"While I braked my feet against the calm waves, tumunghay ako sa hindi kalayuan. And to my glee, natanaw ng mga mata ko ang isang yateng papunta rito sa tagong isla.Lumawak ang ngiti ko."Here!" I screamed. "Help!""Manong!" Shanta howled while waving her arms in the air. "Dito po! Tulong! Nandito kami!"After multiple screamings, the yacht anchored on the shore. Si Clavis ang unang bumaba ng barko at sinundan siya nina Katlego at ang iba."Gago kayo! Sinong nag-isip 'to?! Bakit hindi niyo sinabi s
AS I DROVE the car in the empty streets, the silence inside was slowly chopping off my head and burying my other half in a haunted forest. Mahigpit kong hinawakan ang manibela, nanggigigil at seryosong nakapokus sa daan, dahil wala pa rin siyang imik. "You really won't speak?" I scoffed after minutes of getting killed in evil solitude. "Okay, then. Take your time, Babe. I won't insist further-" "Aalis na ako," putol ni Shanta. I snorted. "Oh, Baby. You can't go because I won't stop the car." "Hindi 'yan ang ibig kong sabihin." My brows furrowed at the icy tone of her voice, which compelled me to steer the wheel and park beside the road. Humi
ANOTHER YEAR has ended and so much has changed in the course of our lives. Last May, Shanta flew to Italy to pursue her course. At first, I didn't accept her leaving the happy life she had here. But it came to my realization that a life can be more fulfilled with a successful career. Mahal ko si Shanta. May pangarap siya sa kanyang sarili at susuportahan ko siya. I had never known this before. Pero ngayon, alam na alam ko na. I also made sure that we'd never lose communication while we're miles apart and in different time zones. Despite our hectic schedule, we still managed to greet each other good morning and good night. We would always video call while studying. One time I had a funny encounter with her. At kapag naiisip ko 'yon, natutuwa at kinikilig pa rin ako.
THE CAR parked in front of a Roman style school grounds and I hopped out with a basket of yellow roses. Kasabay ng pag-alis ng kotse ay ang pagpalo ng malamig na simoy ng hangin sa mukha ko. Somehow, it felt nostalgic and calming. Parang nakikinig lang ako sa malakas na ulan habang nakahiga sa malambot na kama ko. Mas nakakaginhawa pa ang bugso ng hangin sa nagniniyebeng lugar. Because as I pan my head around the school front yard with meadows covered by snow, I could also feel the wind brushing through my long hair with every move my head made. Dahil huling buwan na ng taon, talamak ang niyebe sa iba't ibang sulok ng lugar. Afar from the driveway, a bricked path was flooded by small amount of snow while a bald tree was cloaked by white crystals, which served as its jacket against the cold weather. At kung meron mang punong may d
FIVE MONTHS AFTER the beginning of a new year, everything has already been set. Mula sa mga gawain ko sa dating kurso hanggang sa mga kailangang ipasa para sa panibago, tinapos ko na iyon lahat. Ang pag-impake na lang ang kulang at lalayag na ako sa panibagong buhay na tatahakin ko."Do you really have to do this, Kagan? Mahirap ang buhay mo roon," Mama lamented while she caressed my cheeks, never leaving by my side.Kanina pa ako naka-impake. All the valuable things were already kept while the prohibited ones were excluded from my luggage. Hindi lang ako makaalis dahil kanina pa ako pinipigilan ni Mama. Her tears became visible due to the car beams. Imbes na umalis kami ngayong madaling araw, baka abutin na kami ng umaga at baka mahuli pa ako sa pagpasok sa isang Marine School sa Zambales. Balita ko ay istrikto sila roon, at maaaring si Mama pa ang maging dahilan para hindi ako tuluyang makapasok."We have alre
BADTRIP. Nababadtrip ako kay Avancea. Bakit hindi na lang siya lumayas sa mamanahin kong mansyon? Bakit kailangan pa niyang makipag siksikan sa pamilya namin? Bakit napaka s****p niya simula bata pa kami? Our family would have been better, stronger, if she and her leech mother Amadena hadn’t appeared in our life. Pero may magagawa ba ako sa desisyon ng Papa ko? Meron. But, bullshit, not on this matter. He won’t let me, her genius daughter, dictate his heart. Not even Kuya Dallas who’s vocally against it but is silent when the two leeches are present. Wala rin naman kaming maaasahan kay Mama kasi iniwan niya kami kay Papa at sumama sa lalaki niya. To make matters worse, nagkaroon pa sila ng anak. But all of my mother’s desires faded when she lost everything she fought for. One, her partner who I never met. Second, her son, my step brother. And third, kami ng orihinal na pamilya niya. But serious matters aside, bwisit na bwisit na ako kay Avancea. Sinumbong niya ako tungkol sa pambubu
WHAT’S THAT?” I asked Shanta the moment she entered our bedroom with a book in her hand. Nilapitan ko siya at hinawakan ang bewang niya saka hinalikan siya sa balikat. “Saan pumunta ang Baby Love ko? Hmm?” “Hulaan mo…” biro niya saka kumapit sa bewang ko bago nangunang naglakad. I grinned, then walked with her with my right arm clinging onto her shoulder. Sinilip ko ang librong hinahawakan niya at naintriga ako. “You don’t recognize this, do you?” tanong niya. “Where did you find that?” Shanta looked up at me. “It doesn’t matter. I found it and I fixed everything back.” Binalik niya ang tingin sa libro… o ang manuskritong sinulat ko… at naupo sa dulo ng kama. I also sat beside her with my eyes pinned on her glowing face. “I have been curious about this lately, alam mo ba ‘yon…” kwento niya at sinimulang buklatin ang libro. “Punit-punit ‘to noong nahanap ko kaya nagpabili ako kay Benida ng scotch tape. She helped me put back every page.” Then, she looked at me teasingly. “Ako p
I SMILED at the guests who greeted me and Shanta as we walked on the red carpeted aisle. Hindi ganoon karami ang mga bisita. Nabibilang lang sa mga daliri ang mga tao sa mesa. I recognized almost all of them. Masaya ako at dinaluhan nila kami para sa gabing ito.Shanta and the Six Packs, which included me, sat down at a very special seat near the mini stage. Pabilog ang mesa at pitong upuan ang naroon para sa isa sa amin. Naunang umupo ang mga kaibigan ko. Lachlan and Katlego sat beside each other. Ganoon din si Euart at Jirario. Clavis, however, chose to sit next to her cousin. Samantala ako, pinagitnaan nina Shanta at Jirario. I pulled my Baby’s golden chair before she took her seat. “Musta ka na?” tanong ko kay Jira nang hayaan ko si Shanta na kausapin ang pinsan niya. I smiled at my cousin when I looked at him. It’s been a long time and we have been very busy with our own lives, so it’s nice if we catch up. “Kumusta ka naman at ng inaanak ko? Damn… I can’t believe you’re a family
ISANG BUWAN na ang nakalipas at unti-unti nang humuhupa ang kaguluhan sa Manila. Tito Kadam is already jailed in the New Bilibid Prison while his case is set for an appeal by his lawyers. While Coolidge Mental Care remained a crime scene, the patients were transferred to a safer and better facility. They will be sent back once the investigation is done and once the mental care has found its new owner. Sa ngayon, we’re trying to fix all the casualties, lalo na sa pagpapagamot ng mga pasyente. After all, Shanta and I both experienced a life inside the mental hospital. Nais naming tumulong. “Sir, Ma’am, nandyan na po ang mga bisita,” pagpapaalam ng kasambahay noong pumasok ito sa kwarto ko. “Susunod na kami. Thank you,” I said. And after telling me some more notice, the househelp left the room. Naiwan kami ni Shanta sa harap ng salamin habang inaayos niya ang necktie ko. Two days ago, we left Bohol for our business here in the Metro. Naisip naming ligtas nang tumira sa bahay ko… na
I DON’T KNOW when was the last time that I was energized to wake up. I remembered waking up with a huge weight in my head and I felt so exhausted at the start of the day, that ending it would mean fatigue for a week. But while my eyes remain closed, my mind is already awake. And I could feel Shanta’s small body still embracing me. Napangiti ako. Dahil diyan, bahagyang isinubsob ko ang aking ilong sa buhok niya. Walang pagbabago. Her hair’s scent is still the same lavender with fresh milk. I sniffed like drugs and kissed her forehead and tightened my embrace because I am never gonna lose her again. This moment could’ve happened two years ago if the incident didn’t happen. We could’ve been living on one roof with our two kids that are one-year-old apart, and we’re still making the third one. But even though we’re two years late, this… the night that I woke up beside her is what matters most. This will keep me from waking up and start my day blissfully. Aaraw-arawin ko ito, and the d
THE NEXT DAY, Shanta and I traveled back to Panglao Island, Bohol to stay in her mansion for the meantime while things subside. Hindi sana doon. It could have been my house, but almost everyone knows about it, so definitely, the place is not safe for us. We decided to take a break after the national newscast reported across the country. It was stressful and… chaotic. Ilang media na rin ang sumubok na kuhanan kami ng panayam, but Shanta, although ready to speak up, is not allowed to give herself another stress. I didn’t permit it because she needed rest after trespassing in Kachina's house. Makita-kita ko pang may benda siya sa noo kaya mas lalong hindi ako pumayag. She got it from her cousin who broke a vase on her head. And even though I wanted to make that woman pay, I didn’t want reporters to exploit my Baby’s condition and people to make a feast out of it. Kahit na kami ang nasa tama at ang biktima, hindi ko ginawa. The right people would see it, especially the court. And I wou
I GRINNED AT my reflection in the mirror surface. Our plan is working and just a little more time, this chaos they started would end. I then reached for the clean towel beside my laundry, then wiped my face. This is the only place where I can be myself besides being in Shanta’s arms. No nurse to watch over my every move. No Kachina to observe me and ask leading questions. Just me and myself, staring at each other. After I wiped my face, I spent my fifteen minutes taking a bath. Hindi man ako komportable sa klase ng banyo na meron sila dito, sinubukan kong hindi madiri. Well, I have lived an ordinary life before with a small toilet and a hand pump. I’d be immune to this, I guess. Pero sana… sana hindi magtagal ang pamamalagi ko dito. I can’t take the owner of this place. Pagkatapos kong maligo, I changed into a more comfy clothing. I didn’t wear my usual asylum gown. I don’t need it anyway because I am done with my mission. This is the day I am finally leaving this hell. Besides, nas
KAGE, DELIKADO ‘yang plano mo…” pagtutol ni Shanta. Nakaupo siya sa kabisera ng lamesa ng kanyang opisina sa mansion. “I’m not liking it. Masyadong mapanganib at… nagmumukha tayong mas masama kaysa sa kanila. Ayaw ko ng ganoon. We’re stooping down to their level… and as you said, violence should never be a choice. So, this one… It’s a no for me.” I bit my lower lip because she has a point. Well, it’s obvious that my ultimate plan is too risky… and brutal. Katabi ni Shanta si Benida, na nakaupo sa kanyang kanan. They were both looking at me with a hint of hesitation in their faces. Bahagya akong nakaramdam ng pagkapahiya. Shanta is right. We’re no different from the people who attempted to kill us. Tulad ni Tito Kadam, I am resorting to violence to get what I want. But this is the only way we could penetrate the Coolidge Mental Care. Kung totoo man, naroon ang mga karagdagang ebidensya para magiit ang tatay ni Kachina. Dahil hindi lang niya kami tinangkang patayin, he was even the ma
Kagan’s POV AYAN, KAGAN…” The psychiatric nurse said in utter softness after I obediently drank the medicine she prepared for me. “You are doing well these days and Doc Kachina must be so proud of you. Let’s just wait for her, okay? It’s past ten and she’s not yet here. But don’t worry. Papasok iyon.” I nodded and grinned just a little bit to make her believe Kachina is my calming pill, even when I don’t care whether she comes to work today or not. I then looked away and stared at the barred window the mental care had just built for me. Kung alam lang ng nars, I lost interest in her doctor the night she’s involved in ruining my life. Makalipas ng ilang sandali, narinig ko ang nars sa gilid ko, nagpapaalam para sa susunod na pasyente niya. I didn’t respond or what, then the door creaked open. Mabilis akong tumingin sa kanya, at nang makitang hindi siya nakalingon, I swiftly barfed the medicine I didn’t swallow and the bitter thing fell on my palm. I clenched my fist as soon as I fel