Mordechai
The sound of my keys clattering against the dish at the table inside my apartment seemed to rattle off the walls. Ellie flinched at it but kept walking. Her eyes found just about everything. As I locked all four locks on the door, she examined my living space with such rigor that it had me wishing I were anywhere else. With everything she stared at, I could picture her judging me. I shouldn’t have cared what she thought about how I lived or what I liked, but I found myself holding my breath.
“Can I shower?” Ellie asked, not even commenting on my home.
“This way,” I said, taking the bag from her shoulder and leading her into my bedroom. I had another shower, but this one worked better.
Again, I braced for her to say something. The exposed brick looked like it had seen better days. At least I’d changed the sheets on my king-sized bed. Not that I’d finished making it. The pillows laid on the floor from when I had kicked them off the last time I’d actually slept in bed. All my dirty clothes had been put in the hamper, but I left all of my art supplies on the desk. I had a half-finished sketch, some ink in a jar, references, and other miscellaneous items that I should have put away. My closet hung open, showing that I indeed had more than suits that I liked to wear. It was the walls that looked pathetic. Not a thing on them other than one picture of the ocean, taken by my mother before I could even remember it. With most of my time spent in the living room, that had been my priority in decorating.
Ellie walked into my bathroom without her bag, but the door closed before I could give it back to her. I should have thought of it already, but I’d been too focused on her eyes. On the bloodstains on her face. She would be looking at them as I stood there, seeing destruction speckled all over her skin.
The water started up a minute or so later, and I set my bag on the bed and hers by the door. I tossed my dirty clothes in the dry-cleaning pile and refilled the bag with more things for when this got called off. I hoped it wouldn’t take long for them to figure out if that man had a reason for finding her. Something in my gut told me it would be worse than I thought.
I heard cursing from the bathroom a few seconds before the door opened. Ellie poked her head out. “I broke something…”
Positive she didn’t, I went to walk into the bathroom and check. I found Ellie in nothing but a towel she desperately clutched to her body, barely keeping her covered. I didn’t give her more than a glance, headed to the shower.
“It’s cold,” she said. “I can take a cold shower if I need to, but I can’t get the thingy to move.”
“That’s because it’s a piece of shit,” I grunted, yanking the lever upward. A couple times and that loosened it. I set it on something warmer, testing the water and coming to terms with the fact that it had soaked me.
“Do you need food?” I asked.
“No.”
All right, so I’d make her some food.
I left the bathroom and closed the door behind me. I’d watched Ellie eat way too many times by then, but I didn’t know what to get for her. Also, I didn’t actually have any food. I could order her pizza, but not only would that mean inviting someone to my apartment, but I didn’t know if she would eat pizza.
I heard her crying through the door. Not like she had in her room, where it looked like her body would shatter apart. Where she had screamed, so helpless and weak that I thought it would wound me to hear it.
I had blood on my clothes. Ellie had blood on her clothes as well, which had us coming through the back entrance to get inside unseen. The suit had been ruined, like many, many other suits. It went in the trash while I picked out something else to wear. I went for another suit, pausing before I could grab it.
“Fuck,” I sighed, closing that half of the closet and going to the other one. I slid on a pair of black jeans and a light blue button up to go with it. I left the shoes off. Might as well go all in.
I went into the kitchen to see if I could scrape together something for Ellie to eat. Unless she wanted expired milk and half a bag of baby carrots, I needed something else.
It only occurred to me to check my phone when I heard Ellie’s beeping from the other room. I’d left my dummy phone in the bedroom, but my real one waited in a drawer in the living room. Looking over my shoulder to make sure Ellie hadn’t come out, I went to look at it.
I didn’t find a single message, which was what I’d expected. Jonathan wanted to make sure I couldn’t be traced back to him. The apartment had been scrubbed—not that it had ever been in my name to begin with—and my phone had been wiped as well. When it came time to take the next step, he would find another way to talk to me.
When the time came. We didn’t know how long that would be starting off, and I still had no idea. I also didn’t know what would happen to Ellie. I knew Jonathan had plans, but he hadn’t let me in on them. It would be… interesting, when it was time to finish with Ellie.
A door closed and I put the phone back before I could get caught. Ellie stood at the doorway to my bedroom when I turned around, leaning against it with fresh clothes on and damp hair. She’d abandoned the shoes too, throwing on a black dress that hung loosely to her thighs. She’d cleaned all the blood.
“Well, look at you,” she said as she sauntered on into my living room. “You got all dressed down for me.”
I turned my back to her, trying to sound flat. “Why the hell would you think I did it for you? It’s three in the afternoon and I don’t want to put on another suit.”
A chair scraped against the kitchen floor and I heard wood creak as she took a seat. I had nothing to do, turned to the counter, so I pretended to clean up crumbs.
“I’m finished being upset for the day,” Ellie said. “I’ve decided. I want something new.”
I grunted, really focusing on those imaginary crumbs.
“I’m switching to annoyed. With you.”
“With me?” I asked. “I invite you into my home and that’s what you say?”
“Remember when you laid on my car?”
“Remember when I was trying to keep you alive and you fought me?”
She cleared her throat; her nails tapping on the table. She kept on tapping until I turned around. Too late, I figured out it had been a power move. At least she didn’t look smug.
“Yeah, I’m gonna be annoyed with you. I have a challenge to issue you, if you want my forgiveness. I think the cost should be your humiliation.”
“Ya know, I could probably lock you in the closet and keep you there for a few days. As long as I feed you, I’m still doing my job.”
Her eyes narrowed at me before she clicked her tongue. “You don’t have to try and give me reasons to be annoyed with you. I already am.”
“Thank god for that.”
Her hands laid flat on the table. “Now, onto your humiliation. We’re going to the store.”
I was about to tell her no, but we didn’t have any food. “Why?”
“Because you’re gonna go through the check out alone, buying nothing but lube, a teddy bear, and extra small condoms.”
“Jokes on you. I already have extra small condoms.”
She stared at me. “No, you don’t.”
“Go check my nightstand.”
Her eyes narrowed again, holding for a bit before she rose up. She walked to my room, looking over her shoulder at me every three seconds. I sat back, waiting for her. She bent over, opening the drawer and sifting through it.
“There are no condoms in here,” she said.
I cocked my head, still watching her. “Huh?”
She looked over at me, making me blink. “No condoms.”
“Yeah, well, obviously.”
She huffed, turning back to the drawer. “Goddammit, Mordechai, this is a mess. There is no order here!”
“It’s fine.”
“It’s not fine! Now I have to fix it.”
“I thought we were going to the store.”
“After!”
I sat on my bed, getting my shoes on while she threw away trash, organized remotes, and glowered at me for not having an efficient system to my own home. When did I agree to go to the store?
Standing there in the store, I regretted every choice I’d ever made. Ellie stood beside me. When I glanced down at her, she had a smile on her face. Unburdened. Calm. Maybe I didn’t regret all of my choices.
“We need food,” I said.
“No. We need extra small condoms, remember? Mom wants us to fuck. Do it for her. Fuck me.”
Never mind about not regretting things. “You aren’t funny.”
“I am deeply funny. Sorry you’re too much of a grump to agree. Tell ya what. You go get our condoms, then we can get food.”
“You know they don’t measure condoms like that, right? They put it nicer than extra small.”
“Good for all the penis owners then.”
“It’s not all that bad, your order for me. Just looks like it’s for a date night.”
“Good point. Add a hammer. Ya know, in case the date goes bad.”
“That’s awful.”
“Go do your job.”
I could have, but… “We should make this interesting.”
“How does it get more interesting than my bodyguard fucking me in the missionary position under the blankets with the lights turned off?”
I shut my eyes for one long moment. “I mean, we can play a game of chicken. See who quits first.”
“Do you think I have shame?”
“You think I do?”
And then a war began. I started, putting a massive teddy bear, a bottle of strawberry flavored lube, and a box of the smallest sized condoms on the belt. The cashier did her very best to not react, but I could see it. I smiled at her, handing over cash before I got my receipt. With my teddy bear in tow, I headed over to Ellie, who watched me from the vending machines.
“Wow,” she said. “Okay.”
“Your turn.”
“Fine.”
“Go through with a pint of ice cream and a single cucumber.”
She blushed. “That’s dumb.”
“Is that a no?”
She stepped to me, her stare hard. “Watch me.”
As if I could do anything else.
Ten minutes later and we had a cart full of shit we didn’t need. For my next round, she had me go through with a thing of baby food, a baby doll, and a bottle of wine. Hers was eight different kinds of birthday cards to a father, a tool set, a book about war, a very nice watch, and a mug that said, ‘world’s best daddy’. After that, I went up with a vanilla candle and a copy of something with a very shirtless man on the cover. Weak pick, I thought. Then Ellie went up with a single steak knife. Only the knife.
“I’m making you use the Daddy mug,” she told me as she put her new things in our cart. “When do we give up on this?”
We’d been at it for an hour and a half at that point, and Ellie had giggled enough that I thought she had a real chance of avoiding nightmares later on.
“You seem to be shameless,” I said. “So, we can end any time.”
“I’m shameless? What about you?”
“Fearless, Ellie. I have to be able to handle anything with a job like mine.”
She glared at me, picking things out of the cart and putting them in the donation bin by the door. “How does one even get into the business of bodyguarding? Especially for a family like mine.”
“I’m sure your father told you I used to guard an internet personality.”
“Yeah, but there’s a big difference between that and guarding someone who walks out of a store and has to watch someone blow their brains out. Don’t play dumb. We both know the sorts of things that happen around me. You don’t just fall into this.”
“No, you don’t.” But I left it at that. Ellie let it go, pushing the now emptier cart forward. She hopped up onto the lower bar, riding it down the way.
I let her pick the food, taking mental notes of what she liked. Why I did that, I couldn’t say. I’d only have to fee her for a day or two, and this grown woman would be perfectly capable of feeding herself.
“Do we end this with a final, couples edition of Let’s Traumatize the Cashier?” Ellie asked, picking up a bag of corks and holding a waxing kit in her other hand.
“They don’t get paid enough for this.”
“Yeah, you might have a point. What do you want for dinner?”
“Why? Are you cooking?”
She blushed a bright, vibrant red before she whipped around and started pushing the cart. “Oh, they have cookies.”
Naturally, I had questions.
I hurried to catch up with her as she loaded cookies into the cart. When she tried to push it forward, I put my hand on the edge to stop it. She lifted an eyebrow, pushing harder. The cart didn’t budge.
I’d never heard a voice so flat as when Ellie said, “Oh god, please don’t turn me on, here, in this grocery store. I would hate to have to jump you in the ice cream section.”
“That would be very cold.”
“Why should that stop us?”
I let go of the cart. “You really shouldn’t be making those kinds of jokes after the confirmation that your mother was actually trying to get me to sleep with you.”
Ellie snickered, turning the cart around to head back to the front to check out. She rode the cart all the way to the car before coming to a less than graceful stop where she almost ate shit on the pavement. I caught her around the middle, holding her up before she could lose teeth.
Setting her on her feet, I said, “Maybe go sit in the car.”
She had started walking before she stopped, turning and looking at the trunk as I loaded it. “Do you want help?”
I smiled to myself at the effort of even asking. That she thought of it at all surprised me. “I got it.”
She ignored me, bending over to put bags in the trunk. It seemed like a point of pride, so I let it go. After we loaded everything, she got into the car and let me put the cart away. She had a candy bar when I got in again.
Ellie made it a game to see how many bags she could get on her arms before she died. She topped it off with a giant teddy bear over her face as she grunted her way to the elevator and whimpered the whole way up. I would have been more than happy to help, but she growled at me when I reached for the bags. At some point, she stopped using words with me.
Everything got put on the table before she went into my room to change into her pajamas. I had everything put away fast enough that when Ellie came stumbling out of my bedroom in a sweater and shorts, she didn’t have anything to do.
“Hey,” she slurred. “I was gonna help.”
“Are you wasted right now?”
“Not at all,” she said, shuffling over to the counter where I had the many, many snacks she’d bought. She’d had cash out before I could even grab my wallet.
I snagged her around the waist, yanking her to me while she squeaked. I bent down to her, sniffing.
“Oh, are you trying to seduce me?” she giggled.
“You smell like wine and whiskey. How the hell did you sneak that without me noticing?”
She patted my chest, then put both hands on my shoulders. “I am a woman of many talents. God, and you are tall. Can I lick you a little?”
I brought her over to the couch when she wobbled, dumping her on the cushions. She made an oof sound, trying to sit up and calling me rude over and over again.
What else did I miss?
“I needed it,” she complained. “I need it every time.”
Did she?
It didn’t take long for her to fall asleep, and I hadn’t even gotten the chance to bring out blankets for her to sleep with on the couch. The narrow, not meant for sleeping couch. I already knew what I would do, but I still managed to be annoyed and convince myself I wouldn’t do it for a half hour.
Giving up, I went to the couch and scooped Ellie up into my arms. She didn’t make a sound, dead to the world. I dumped her on my bed, wishing to god that I hadn’t cared so much about… any of this.
EllieI woke up with my face against a pillow that didn’t smell like me. My head ached, but only barely. Something I could ignore with ease. I couldn’t ignore the sense that I didn’t belong where I slept.The curtains shut the light out and the door had been closed. Even so, I knew I hadn’t slept at home. Every bit of the bed just felt like Mordechai. I couldn’t really explain it. The apartment felt like him too. The exposed brick, the empty bedroom and the decorated living room. The details got to me. The things I saw in the paintings that he had hung up. Everything had water. Every single picture had some body of water in it. It gave me about a million questions to ask. First, I wanted to know I ended up this bed.I pushed the blankets off me and went to the window. One pull on the cord had the room lit up in seconds. I didn’t like looking at it, feeling like something was missing. No pictures of family. No books. No signs of things that might have brought him joy or passed the time
MordechaiIt had been war last night, deciding who would sleep on the couch. A war quickly won, because Ellie had settled for hopping onto the couch and sprawling herself out. She refused to move, and I refused to carry a sober person to bed. I left her in the living room and went to enjoy my own bed.When I woke up in the morning, I smelled food cooking. The sun hadn’t even risen and my alarm hadn’t gone off. It didn’t annoy me. Not in the slightest, even at the scent of burning eggs. I should have been annoyed. I wanted to be. I wanted to open that door, see her making a mess of my kitchen, and want her out of here. The noise of her did something to me. Even knowing I had another person in my home made me less anxious to be awake.I opened the door, indeed finding my kitchen a mess. Ellie scraped blackened eggs into a bowl, cringing at it as the mess dropped. She sprinkled cheese on it as if that would make things better. Next up came the toast, surprisingly not burnt. She did, howe
Ellie“Please don’t hate me, but I need to go away for a little while. I promise I’ll take you for a thousand walks when I get home.”Dandelion stared at me, doubtful even as he got pet behind the ears like he enjoyed best. I knew I would pay for abandoning him later. Probably in the form of him refusing to sleep with me for a week or so. At least Dad would spoil him rotten the whole time I was away.I had a new bag packed with a week of clothes, desperate that I wouldn’t need them all. Dad gave no indication of when this would end, which left me less than hopeful. We had no threat here. I couldn’t see why he would go this far.I spent more time than I should have fixing my books, putting back every single one of them. Even the ones I didn’t want. It needed to look the same as it had before. When I came home, I wanted everything preserved.Mordechai watched me fix the books and pack up more clothes. He kept looking at the closed door like he thought someone would try and come in. As i
MordechaiI cleaned when I woke up, but I had to do it quietly. Strange, waiting up at four in the morning because I couldn’t stay asleep. I dreamt about her. When I woke up, it left my hands shaking. I couldn’t get back to sleep, and I knew I wouldn’t. I didn’t want to. I didn’t want more of it. In my mind, it had been soft. The dream—the whole fucking dream—had been her and I sitting together. She had a dress on, sitting on a big pillow on the floor, sipping tea as she read a book. I sat across from her, with my back at the wall as I sketched. We would look up at each other when we thought the other wouldn’t notice. More often than not, we would catch each other. My heart thudded when I thought about the smile on her face. I hoped it would at least be so kind as to destroy me in an act of mercy. It didn’t, making me feel peace instead. I got up and I left all those thoughts on the mattress. I looked back at it as if I would see one last picture of the dream. I saw a messy bed, wi
EllieJerk. If he hadn’t lied to me, then I could have confided in him all the awful, twisty things in my guts that threatened to tear me apart. I couldn’t very well do that with him lying to me. It probably would have made me stupid. For all I knew, he had that phone for innocent reasons. Or, as innocent as a secret phone could be. He might have gotten the fake one when he got hired on by us, intent on keeping his private life in secret. I could understand that. Either I had no justification for the anger, or I needed to be afraid. I stared at the phone in my hand, sitting in the darkness of the living room. I’d been in my jammies for hours, and Mordechai had been sleeping since ten. The phone had a lock and needed a thumbprint to unlock it. When I peeked into his room, I saw that his hand hung over the edge of the bed. I could trust him, and assume he had the phone to keep us out of his life. A reasonable desire. But my instincts told me something different. I’d noticed things abo
MordechaiBefore dawn, I sent a message to Jonathan with the update he wanted. I made it fast, as I had nothing to say. I didn’t give him the location or anything. If he wanted to find out, he could discover it anyway. I lived in a place where everyone ignored what they saw, based on a universal understanding that it was best for everyone if we stayed out of each other’s business. Ellie was still asleep by the time the sun came up, and after I finished cleaning, and cooking, and when the clock clicked over to eight. I walked over to the couch, checking to see if she faked it. Nope.I sat at the table with a project I’d decided to start. A fictional map from a book I had read a few weeks ago. I drew it from memory, and I knew I had the details right. I didn’t know why I made it. I just wanted to do it. I took great care in each line and dot, stroke and swipe. I sketched out the map, my mind twisted up with how I’d woken up this morning. My bed had smelled like Ellie. I started thinki
EllieThe lightbulb burned out on my third flip of the switch. I cursed under my breath, knowing I would have to either tell Mordechai, or let it go. If I left it for him, he might have had some questions and it would have led to more talking. We could only talk so much before I finally snapped. I had enough wrong with me that I could have a whole conversation with a man about how he might have to kill me later on, so clearly, I didn’t know how the hell to behave. Also, there was the bit about him holding me against a wall and dry humping the fuck out of me. But I had to deal with a broken light.“Mordechai?” I called before I took a sip of my very Irish coffee. “A bulb in the bathroom is out.” It only took seconds before he showed up from his bedroom. Without saying a word, he grabbed a bulb from the hallway closet, changed the old one, and then walked out again. Ah, okay. He could press his dick against me for five very pleasant minutes, but he drew the line at looking me in the ey
MordechaiThe fact that she thought I could somehow remove myself from the situation almost made me laugh. I might have been able to if there was anything about this whole ordeal. Like I could walk in, quit, and everything would be fine. She could run to Locke and tell him everything—supposedly leaving me out—and saving my life while ruining all the ones around me. If Locke found out Jonathan really and honestly wanted Ellie dead, Locke would start a war. Ellie didn’t seem to believe that of her father. I found it odd how she could discuss the very real fact that her father would have people killed, but didn’t seem to be able to reconcile the words with reality. Like it all seemed to be an abstract concept some part of her didn’t fully believe yet. Ellie would be safe at home waiting for me. I dressed like normal, putting on a suit and ignoring the fact that something about it felt strange now. I didn’t like walking out of the apartment and having Ellie see me like that. It didn’t he
Mordechai“It’s fucking c-c-c-cold! No one said it would be this cold!” I hissed, teeth chattering as I wrapped Ellie in another sweater. “Why are we outside? We should do this inside. We have fire there. We have warmth.” Ellie rolled her eyes, perfectly happy to sit on our porch with blankets and sweaters and several pairs of socks. “We just have to do the first present, then we can go in. Come on, sunset is pretty.” I sat down in my chair and tried to warm myself up. The wind against the ocean didn’t help, as it blew misty air against us. When it did, Ellie would close her eyes and inhale that smell of the sea. Of the stone on the mountains and the moss that grew on it. It was very, very beautiful, but cold on a Christmas Eve night. “You have to go first,” I said, picking up the present I had under the small tree Ellie had put on the porch. I needed two hands to lift it up. We’d saved the good stuff for the morning.“Dandelion should go first,” Ellie insisted, plucking a squeak t
EllieIt hadn’t been much of a goodbye. We couldn’t be seen by anyone but my mother and father, who drove us to a private plane hangar. We didn’t meet the pilot, we didn’t have anyone to help us. We were given a ton of cash to get us from the airport to the new house, the dog, a bag each, and we were told everything would be waiting for us at the house. I had a map, notes, and not much else. My mother hugged me for ten minutes, not saying a word. She promised to write and maybe come visit some time. That could take years and we all knew it. I could be a mother. I could be a much older woman. I could never see them again. “Thank you,” I had said to my father in those final moments. He looked at me, this man, this monster, and he put his hand against my cheek. “I don’t want you to think I’m evil, Ellie. I love you and your mother more than anything else in this world. Even myself.” My eyes burned, “I believe you,” I’d said, honest in that moment. I could change my mind later. In a d
MordechaiEllie wouldn’t stop picking at her nails. She sat on the edge of her tub, bloodstained and shaking like she had been for over an hour. Her mother desperately tried to get that blood out of her hair. Our clothes had been taken and replaced, and I hadn’t asked what would be done with them. The house had been empty when we returned to the Locke estate. Only Alex, Locke, Ellie and I walked through the doors, and Mrs. Locke waited for us in Ellie’s room. “I told you I would make it right,” Locke said to his daughter, watching her distant eyes. “Everything is going to be okay. It’s always okay for us.” I couldn’t stop thinking about all I’d seen. I’d been in the middle of some brawls in my time, but not an outright slaughter. It had only been the man named Alex. Locke had walked backwards, pushing through the door to hide in the hallway while his man did everything. I didn’t even have time to fire off a shot before I pulled Ellie to the floor. Alex kicked Jonathan under the chin
EllieI held the phone in my hand, standing in the darkness of my bathroom as if that silence would somehow lead me to an answer. I found none. I had my father waiting for me and no idea what he would do. The fact that he let me leave to pee almost felt like a shock. He would start to wonder where I was soon enough. It felt like I stood at the edge of a cliff as a pack of wolves advanced on me. Either I could let them tear me to pieces, or I could leap to the rocks below. I lost either way, but at least with the rocks, it felt like my choice. But I didn’t want to fucking die. I didn’t want to lose. I wanted my happy ending with Mordechai, and I wanted it not to feel like too much to ask for. When I stepped out, three of my dad’s men stood there waiting for me. Alex waited front and center, staring at me like he thought I would run. That alone made me want to do it. Surely something better could have been waiting for me outside of this house. “Elle,” he said, gesturing back the way
MordechaiI thought if I sat there long enough, surely my insides would begin to implode. I would get a kind, merciful death that would free me. But every time I thought I would finally die, I would open my eyes again and see the desk, the guards, the way I had no choices. I could live if I wanted. Jonathan would have chosen that. Kill the girl and back to business as usual. I had decided long ago that I wouldn’t let anything happen to her. If this man truly understood that, he would end my life. “I think the wisest thing we can do is get her here,” Jonathan said to me. “and handle everything somewhere safe.” “I can go get her,” I said automatically. If I could only get out of the room, then I could find Ellie and warn her. Better yet, I could grab her and run. How far would we have gotten? I would put her safety above all else, but if we could be together at the end of this… I needed that. I needed her. I didn’t know how to go on with my life without her. How would I fade back to n
EllieI kept my eyes on the driver the whole time, half thinking the guy would try to kill me. I’d seen him before though. One of my dad’s guys, so he probably didn’t have plans to swerve into a tree and take us both out. I almost wanted him to. At least I could rest that way. The drive felt longer than normal, though I knew we went down the same path as Mordechai brought me a few times before. I stared at the empty seat next to me, wishing so badly he sat there. I pictured him taking my hand so I would know everything would be fine. A day would come where things didn’t hurt like this. It might have been some wishful thinking. Gravel crunched under the tires, alerting me that my time had run out. I should have texted Mordechai so he could say something to me that would relax my heart. I knew those words didn’t really exist though. I needed to make myself calm down. My dad just wanted to see me. Trying to look at his face might have been though. Trying to deal with the fact that I ha
MordechaiIt felt like sitting at the bottom of a mountain and waiting for the lava to come cover me. I could see the blazing red pouring down the side, inching closer and closer to me with every passing moment. It would come burn me any moment, but I didn’t get up. I didn’t run. Maybe I should have. Where would I go if I ran? I couldn’t picture a place that would appeal to me. It all looked dull in my head, as it always did. Nothing had that spark that people got. That little bump in their heartbeat at the idea of escaping somewhere better. Nothing could compare to this apartment, because I woke up with Ellie beside me in the mornings. I’d known this whole time it wouldn’t last. But you couldn’t survive lava when it found you at the bottom of the mountain. I couldn’t sit on the couch and wait for Ellie to come back. It would have sent me running for that lava just to get it over with. Instead, I kept myself busy with making the bed, cleaning the counters, and making everything neat
EllieI hoped to god standing my ground and not looking weak did it for him. I didn’t feel very strong, no matter what I said. My bones itched for me to grab that wine glass and down the whole thing in one go, but I resisted. I needed my wits about me for this, and I knew it would only taste like failure. I heard my father in my head, telling me to drink. I saw him pouring me wine with dinner when the conversation would get to be a little too much for him. I saw the look in his eyes when he figured out I’d started drinking without him, and how he pretended not to notice how often I smelled like alcohol. “Are you planning on telling your father we met today?” Urie asked me. He set his glass of wine down and I tried not to stare at it. “Should I?” I asked. “That’s up to you. I’m sure you know our relationship is a little contentious at best. He might be angry to find out that we shared a meal together.” Ah. I needed to turn up the dad hate. “I think he would be very, very upset. Whi
Mordechai“It’s pretty fuckin’ stupid how much my thighs hurt,” Ellie complained. She wiggled around on the bed, grabbing her leg and pulling it up to stretch. “Do you have to be so big?” “No, I can try and little up for you if you want. No problem.” She stuck her tongue out at me, then winced when she switched legs. I told her we could try out other positions. No skin off my nose. She’d insisted she liked it on top of me, making it pointless to try other things. I did not agree. “Maybe we shouldn’t have done it three times in a day,” I commented, adding a line to the sketch I had in front of me. Ellie stopped to glower at me like I’d suggested we eat a live kitten. “You take that back right now. I may be in absolute agony, but I have no regrets. Every part of me hurts, but that’s just proof I got rocked and I can live with it.” “I feel bad. Where’s the proof I got rocked too?” She smirked. “You have a post got-some glow about you. I mean, I assume. You look happier than usual,