Trust to trash

I sauntered on the quiet street, helpless and tired. My day was a really terrible one. It was probably one of the worst days in my entire life. 

I spotted a side bench by the corner of the street, and traipsed to it. I needed to relax. My mind needed to get rid of my sad and horrific thoughts, but it just couldn't.

 I sat on the bench gently, and began to recall what happened earlier. 

I had decided to ignore the errand my mom asked me to go for. My parents wasted my time enough, so I needed to get to work first. When I got to work, my boss was already waiting for me at the doorstep. And as soon as he spotted me coming, he walked to me and started to curse at me, as usual. To be sincere, I didn't feel a bit of sadness because I was so used to that already. I tried to plead, but it didn't work out.

He embarrassed me so badly that I regretted the fact that I went to work. I thought that maybe I shouldn't have ignored the errand, or maybe I should have left home as soon as I saw Linda had left, or maybe I should have apologized to my boss more. But no matter the maybes, nothing could change. What needed to happen already did. He fired me.

The fact that he fired me or embarrassed me, hurt me so bad. But, it hurt me even more when I found out that my mom caused all of it. I didn't know how she did it but I was sure she did it. All I could observe was her coming out of my workplace immediately my boss fired me, and giving me a deadly smirk. A really frustrating and sad one.

She walked to me and stood in my front. Without uttering a word, I could read her facial expression. It wore pure wickedness. We gazed at each other for a while, then she left, not giving me the chance to say anything, as usual.

I was so devastated. I couldn't fathom anything that was going on. All I did was to leave the vicinity. I didn't know where to go. Home wasn't the better option, or even a good option at all. So, I decided to visit Drake. I knew I told him I was going to visit till the next day, but I needed somebody to comfort me and tell me that everything would be okay.

I quivered in my posture and couldn't stop recalling my terrible day. I needed to get to Drake's house so I could stop thinking about the sad things that were going on in my life.

I breathed out, standing from the bench, and heading to his house. His house wasn't so far from where I was. It was only a few streets away. I hardly came there on my own because Drake never allowed me to. He always complained that the environment was too quiet and wasn't really safe for a lady to walk on her own. But, due to the disturbing thing I was experiencing, I cared less about my life. What was the point in living a life that only brought sorrow to me?

I trekked on the street, still so intense in my thoughts. I couldn't even cry. Tears were not able to come out of my eyes anymore. Even if I tried to force it, a tear could hardly drop. Life was taking me to a point where the tears in my eyes were almost drying up. My life was becoming a nightmare. An extreme nightmare.

Finally, I got to Drake's place. I stood in front of his door and hesitated before knocking. I was still so embarrassed by what he did to me that night, that I didn't want to face him. But, I had no choice. He was the best person that could comfort me. I also thought of it as an opportunity to tell him about the marriage my parents were planning on.

I sighed before knocking the door, and no one answered, so I tried knocking again. But still, it was to no avail. I was about to knock again when I observed that it wasn't even locked, so I stepped in, and shut the door behind me.

The place was quiet, and I guessed that he was probably asleep. I glanced through the living room and noticed a shirt on his couch. It seemed like someone else was in there. The shirt looked feminine, and that made me also guess that his sister was probably around. But, he didn't state it to me. It was probably the reason he asked me to come over earlier. I shrugged and headed to the stairs. 

A part of me had a bit of doubt for some reason. I never wanted to doubt him, because I trusted him a hundred percent that he could never think of cheating on me.

Although I tried to kill the crazy thought, it still kept on reflecting in my mind. 

'Snap out of it! How can you even think of doubting the only person who cares about you?' I thought to myself. 

I ignored my crazy thoughts, and walked gently on the stairs. I got to the corridor of his room, and strolled to his room door. The closer I moved to his door, my doubts aggravated, which made me walk slow.

His room door was opened a little, and that made me feel really nervous for an unknown reason. And, I became more nervous when I heard a lady's voice from his room. There wasn't a crime in hearing a lady's voice. It could be his sister, but it didn't seem so. It wasn't just a mere voice. It was a moan.

"Oh my gosh Drake. I think I'm gonna lose control of myself." A tiny voice sounded from his room.

I became more nervous. Nervous was even an understatement. The fear that gripped me was an unexplainable one. What if my thoughts and doubts were right? What would I do? He was literally the only one I had left. What would happen?

'Lord please, save me. Let my thoughts and doubts be invalid!'

I sighed anxiously, and opened the door silently. I shut my eyes as soon as I walked into the room, and hesitated before opening it. If what I thought was true, I could die. I was sure I would die.

I froze in my position. I could feel my heart race faster than ever, and my brain began to explode. My eyes shook rapidly, and it burnt from the inside. No exact word could explain what I felt. 'Trembling' was nothing close to my mental and emotional level. I didn't know if I was still on Earth. I didn't know if I was facing reality or I was in a dream.

My life was definitely over. Everything had become ruined. All my trust was now trash. Everything was over. Absolutely everything. My thoughts were right. My doubts were true. He was cheating on me. He finally killed my trust.