LOGINShare
Chapter 15
Last Updated:
2024-10-29 19:42:56“You know the one thing that gets under my skin the most? The way that you lie.”
Maiden Threwon blinked at me. I balled my hands into fists and barrelled on: “Oh, I don’t mean all the meaningless things you tell us to keep us in the dark. Those things I can wrap my head around; perhaps you think of it as a mercy. Thanks for that. No; what I really hate about all of you maidens is the way you just. Simply. Squirm.’
Threwon’s face had begun to take on a darker shade. Perhaps I owed her sleeplessness for the fact she hadn’t grabbed me by the ear and yanked it off already. I had never seen anybody talk to a servant of the Estate this way before, excluding Madam Dro and her personal staff, who wrote the rules. But I was far too upset to care.
Warning bells rang in my head, telling me it wasn’t just my life on the line here, but…
“Would you still behave the way you do if it were your body about to be molested? Would you still crawl beneath the floorboards… I honestly have no words for what it is the lot of you do, especially you, Lady.” And my voice again dripped heavily, not with honey this time, but with contempt. “I can’t abhor you. I just want you to know the shame I feel at merely being near you; the sheer depth of disgust you create within me. I just wanted you to know. I just wanted to…”
I meant to continue on, to keep attacking her, but for some reason the words stuck in my throat. My limbs shook with invisible energy. It took me a moment to realize that my vision swam, not from rage, but from tears. They swept down from my eyelids like a torrent, choking me; soundless sobs now wracked my body from gut to lung.
I spasmed, perhaps in an effort by my brain to choke oxygen back into me, to dam up the wreckage of my future and my life I would never get to have and the thick sludge of dread that coursed through my blood, like a poison. The weight of my past came back to me. The weight of the nothingness I was raised to become; it all came back to me.
‘This is it; this is what dying feels like’ I thought to myself. ‘It’s far more painful than I imagined.’
I felt a slight pressure apply itself to my arm. Maiden Threwon was petting me, up and down, though she did nothing else.
“Don’t do this” she whispered as though far away. “Please.”
Dornell alone might be okay. He’d always had an intellectual’s mind; perhaps that would be enough to weather his future. It was his soft heart that I worried about. But if anyone could do it, it was him. Elodie…
The chasm in my heart widened even further as thoughts of what would be done to her invaded me. She was strong. She would hold out, at least for a while… Most likely she would keep it all deep inside, letting concern for the younger children drive her even wile she broke, until she could bear it no more. And none of the others could hope to survive in the same way. None of them…
I blinked, feeling my tears beginning to run dry now. A small blessing, to think that at least for this moment, I had passed beyond the point of pain. Past all feeling; my body was now numb and my lungs drew breath as though nothing but they had any meaning anymore, which I couldn’t argue. I felt sleepy; oh, so very sleepy…
But what was the point of sleep?
I looked at Threwon for the first time since I began my tirade, expecting anger, expecting disbelief… I honestly expected anything aside from what I now saw.
Her eyes were bloodshot. They bugged out of her head like a frog’s during asphyxiation. Apart from that her expression remained frozen; I immediately thought of an icy lake about to thaw, and the ill-timed wayfarer trapped on top of it, who feared the plummet into brackish depths should the platform beneath her suddenly give way.
‘That’s Threwon. She is the fisherman upon the frozen lake, trying to keep from falling in.’
She continued stroking my arm with one hand; up and down, up and down her fingers went, though there was no life in her movements. We simply stared at one another. Then without warning she began to plead a steady string of epiphanies: “I’m sorry. Please. I’m sorry. Please don’t do this, please don’t… not here. Please… No.” Her voice was so small and dead that something stirred again inside of me.
I moved without thinking. One moment my arms remained dead at my sides; and the next, they were kneading roughly on her shoulders, trying to massage some life back into her.
Then abruptly – and without any thought, or even common sense on my part, I assure you – I was deep within her arms, crying like a babe.
From there, a little bit of hope found its way back into our sorry lives.
Related chapters
Greenling Chapter 16
Threwon and I stayed that way for what seemed like forever, until doors began to open and the shuffling of morning risers could be heard.She broke away from me abruptly, looking terrified. “What am I… Go back to your room! Now!”I hesitated. The Threwon I had known years ago was evident in her features, but a harsh tint of reality now began to return, and I feared that soon, the teacher I liked would again be replaced by our stern overseer.There was so much more to say, but not enough time. Time, damnit! Still, I managed to say the first thing that came to mind in a shaking voice: “So you really
Greenling Chapter 17
“Hey, Veille! Mind giving me a hand with my bed?”I sat up in my bunk and looked across the room. Torvis rarely said anything to me when it was just the two of us – and myself to him – but today, it seemed, that was due for a change.I swung my legs over and leapt down like I usually did. Today was a rest day; Mannerly Hall was apparently undergoing some maintenance, likely to refurbish the floors and swap out furniture and shelves. This sort of thing only happened once in a blue moon, and in fact, the last day off I could remember having – aside from our weekends – was during the last purge more than a year ago, when it seemed like half the Hall had been uprooted and exchanged overnight.It had taken me a while of scouting around to realize that mostly
Greenling Chapter 18
I burst out laughing.Dornell frowned. “I’m serious!! There’s really just no other explanation. Unless somehow we were drugged, and a lot more time passed than we thought, then– ““I’m sorry, but is this really Dornell I’m talking to?!” I asked. “You know, my best friend, the one who always has a perfectly logical explanation whenever something weird is going on? Sorcery?? Gods! I never thought I’d say this, but I’d almost rather be talking to Torvis…”Torvis.I stopped laughing and looked my f
Greenling Chapter 19
The rest of the night passed fitfully for me. Upon waking to Dornell’s hands shaking me – having only just managed to close my eyes, it seemed – the stressful ambiguity of last night fell upon me like a mess of bodies. I probably screeched at my friend to shut up and let me go back to sleep, only to draw worried gazes from the rest of my bunk mates, but the whole waking part remains a little hazy for me.Put simply: it really sucked, and I felt like throwing up.“What happened??” Ellie demanded after I’d gotten my feet upon the floor again. Groggy, I stumbled over to the dresser and went about grabbing random articles of clothing.
Greenling Chapter 20
“Severo!!!” I practically shouted. My mouth hung wide open. After nearly ten years without a word, standing there before me was the man I’d come to think of like a father. And he looked older; that told me I wasn’t insane.I stepped forward, tentatively – and a wonderful grin began to awaken upon my face, the first sign of life I’d felt all morning.“Quiet!” Maiden Threwon hissed at me. “Do you want everyone to hear?? This is a most inappropriate meeting.”Maiden Severo just continued to
Greenling Chapter 21
“There are things going on within these walls that you don’t know about. I didn’t, either, and I’m probably still not even supposed to. But I’ve seen things, Veille – things I’ve only witnessed by living as long as I have and wandering where I’m not supposed to. Perhaps Madam Dro and the other administrators see no harm in one old, foolish man, and I aim to keep it that way. With any luck I’ll be able to take those things I’ve seen to my grave without it being any sooner for it. But there are some things you’ll need to know if you’re going to survive, you and all your young friends.”Severo’s hand began clenching my shoulder. It wasn’t a painful grip, not for me anyway, but still it surprised me with its strength. “Do you believe in sorcery, Veille? In magic? Well, you need to
Greenling Chapter 22
I practically sprinted back into the lunch room where the others were setting their plates aside. All faces turned to look at me abruptly, some looking alarmed; even Dornell’s eyes were wider than usual.I gave them all a gigantic smile, and I truly meant it.Elodie glided over to me with astounding speed. “Where have you been? I’ve been worried about you, what happened?”“Veille wasn’t back yet?” I heard Syrieze mumble to Torvis, who shrugged. I ignored them both.“I met with Severo! He told me so many things, like how he and Threwon actually want to help us escape. But that’s not all; he also said it will be a lot ha
Greenling Chapter 1
My first memory of love came around the time I was five, or maybe six, years old. I remember standing upon a balcony of the Northern Estate, peeking up over the banister and catching my first glimpse of the world that lay beyond. Granted, I couldn’t see much – and what I saw wasn’t exactly groundbreaking – but still, it was something more than I’d ever experienced since the first day I had waddled from my crib, taking to my knees as though they were hawk’s wings and soaring across the marble floors, or at least it was told to me that way.There were fields of green and gold waiting beyond the railing of that balcony. Servants worked in those fields, harvesting fruits and wheat and spices like torf; a
Latest chapter
Greenling Chapter 22
I practically sprinted back into the lunch room where the others were setting their plates aside. All faces turned to look at me abruptly, some looking alarmed; even Dornell’s eyes were wider than usual.I gave them all a gigantic smile, and I truly meant it.Elodie glided over to me with astounding speed. “Where have you been? I’ve been worried about you, what happened?”“Veille wasn’t back yet?” I heard Syrieze mumble to Torvis, who shrugged. I ignored them both.“I met with Severo! He told me so many things, like how he and Threwon actually want to help us escape. But that’s not all; he also said it will be a lot ha
Greenling Chapter 21
“There are things going on within these walls that you don’t know about. I didn’t, either, and I’m probably still not even supposed to. But I’ve seen things, Veille – things I’ve only witnessed by living as long as I have and wandering where I’m not supposed to. Perhaps Madam Dro and the other administrators see no harm in one old, foolish man, and I aim to keep it that way. With any luck I’ll be able to take those things I’ve seen to my grave without it being any sooner for it. But there are some things you’ll need to know if you’re going to survive, you and all your young friends.”Severo’s hand began clenching my shoulder. It wasn’t a painful grip, not for me anyway, but still it surprised me with its strength. “Do you believe in sorcery, Veille? In magic? Well, you need to
Greenling Chapter 20
“Severo!!!” I practically shouted. My mouth hung wide open. After nearly ten years without a word, standing there before me was the man I’d come to think of like a father. And he looked older; that told me I wasn’t insane.I stepped forward, tentatively – and a wonderful grin began to awaken upon my face, the first sign of life I’d felt all morning.“Quiet!” Maiden Threwon hissed at me. “Do you want everyone to hear?? This is a most inappropriate meeting.”Maiden Severo just continued to
Greenling Chapter 19
The rest of the night passed fitfully for me. Upon waking to Dornell’s hands shaking me – having only just managed to close my eyes, it seemed – the stressful ambiguity of last night fell upon me like a mess of bodies. I probably screeched at my friend to shut up and let me go back to sleep, only to draw worried gazes from the rest of my bunk mates, but the whole waking part remains a little hazy for me.Put simply: it really sucked, and I felt like throwing up.“What happened??” Ellie demanded after I’d gotten my feet upon the floor again. Groggy, I stumbled over to the dresser and went about grabbing random articles of clothing.
Greenling Chapter 18
I burst out laughing.Dornell frowned. “I’m serious!! There’s really just no other explanation. Unless somehow we were drugged, and a lot more time passed than we thought, then– ““I’m sorry, but is this really Dornell I’m talking to?!” I asked. “You know, my best friend, the one who always has a perfectly logical explanation whenever something weird is going on? Sorcery?? Gods! I never thought I’d say this, but I’d almost rather be talking to Torvis…”Torvis.I stopped laughing and looked my f
Greenling Chapter 17
“Hey, Veille! Mind giving me a hand with my bed?”I sat up in my bunk and looked across the room. Torvis rarely said anything to me when it was just the two of us – and myself to him – but today, it seemed, that was due for a change.I swung my legs over and leapt down like I usually did. Today was a rest day; Mannerly Hall was apparently undergoing some maintenance, likely to refurbish the floors and swap out furniture and shelves. This sort of thing only happened once in a blue moon, and in fact, the last day off I could remember having – aside from our weekends – was during the last purge more than a year ago, when it seemed like half the Hall had been uprooted and exchanged overnight.It had taken me a while of scouting around to realize that mostly
Greenling Chapter 16
Threwon and I stayed that way for what seemed like forever, until doors began to open and the shuffling of morning risers could be heard.She broke away from me abruptly, looking terrified. “What am I… Go back to your room! Now!”I hesitated. The Threwon I had known years ago was evident in her features, but a harsh tint of reality now began to return, and I feared that soon, the teacher I liked would again be replaced by our stern overseer.There was so much more to say, but not enough time. Time, damnit! Still, I managed to say the first thing that came to mind in a shaking voice: “So you really
Greenling Chapter 15
“You know the one thing that gets under my skin the most? The way that you lie.”Maiden Threwon blinked at me. I balled my hands into fists and barrelled on: “Oh, I don’t mean all the meaningless things you tell us to keep us in the dark. Those things I can wrap my head around; perhaps you think of it as a mercy. Thanks for that. No; what I really hate about all of you maidens is the way you just. Simply. Squirm.’Threwon’s face had begun to take on a darker shade. Perhaps I owed her sleeplessness for the fact she hadn’t grabbed me by the ear and yan
Greenling Chapter 14
I had woken up early that morning. Some unseen clock hand ticked past my head at a youthful hour, and without warning I was wide awake, blinking away the sand.I looked around to the windows of our bunk room. I still wasn’t entirely sure whether they opened onto the grounds of the Estate, or to some self-contained courtyard within its dimensions. Dornell would probably know. Either way, judging from the lighting filtering through it was just barely approaching dawn. Sleep had eluded me much of the night, as it often did these days. My shoulders creaked and I cursed under my breath as I swung my legs over the edge of my bunk, hoping not to wake Dornell. Half-hoping.I changed straight from my pajamas into my daywear. I felt in need of a nice hot bath, but also doubted I’d find the motivation to take one this morning anyway.
