1— First Heartbreak

Hailed as a wicked villainess, I was nothing more than a trial for the saint’s journey to her love, a supporting role even in my own love story, a being destined to tread a thorny, torturous path. I was cursed to live a miserable existence— only to watch others bask in a dazzling glory— and all this for being born from a forbidden relationship. I never asked to be a half-vampire, half-werewolf. My destiny was sealed the moment I was born; I was bound to never fall in love and was never meant to be loved. Having this cursed life, I thought— no— I believed I could never love a man, or so I thought.

Just like how my life was designed to be, I could only watch from a distance as sorrows embraced my weeping soul in response to the heart-wrenching scene I dreaded to witness. Even in this dark alley, I could clearly see his bright alluring smile. Those expressions on his face showed me that my love was simply hopeless.

I wanted to be 'the one' with him, exchanging vows... more than anything else. I wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. My desire was stronger than any yearning I had ever felt but how did it still end up this way?

I’m not sure what’s more tragic... is it that I know what we are, or that I know what we are not? Perhaps, we were indeed supposed to meet, but not destined to be together... and we were also meant to love each other, but not to the end. I embraced myself as I felt the cold breeze touch my skin and my mind flashed back to the day I confessed my love for him—

He was lying in the grass with a book covering his face. I silently walked toward him and stood behind the Banaba tree near him. The night was serene with only the soft chirping of the cricket echoing in the vast hill but my chest was hammering loud and it felt like butterflies— no, a whole zoo is running wild in my stomach. 

I feigned a cough. “I have something to tell you, Alpas.”

“What is it?”

I took a quick peek at him and saw that the book was still in his face. I walked toward him but he didn’t move an inch at all. I’m not expecting anything from this... I simply want to get everything off my chest before he leaves to enter the military academy.

“Listen to me,” I urged him, scratching my fingers. I tried to sound confident, but deep down I was scared to death my heart might leap out of my chest. “I’ll only say this once, so pay attention.”

“What does the infamous Queen of Mean want to say to me?”

“I am not joking,” I answered impatiently.

I took a seat next to him, drew my knees together, and stared at him. I couldn’t care less about how others perceived me even if they circulated malicious, absurd rumors about me around the campus. It didn't matter at all but when did Alpas' opinion matter so much to me?

For I was used to it, I grew up in a place where my every move was scrutinized, and I was sick of being compared to my nearly perfect step-sister.

Thus, when they tell me I’m a crazy cold-hearted witch, I became one for them. After all, it’s easier to be heartless and hardened like stone rather than trying to earn their acknowledgment and respect. Since, at the end of the day, I am just an outsider in the biggest conglomerate of the country— SN Group— on top of that, I don’t even have the Silver Night Pack’s blood coursing through my veins.

"Are you just gonna stare?"

"Are you just going to interrupt me?"

I winced at my response to his teasing when he let out a soft chuckle. How do we always end up bantering? I let out an exasperated sigh. He really loves messing around with me and he knows how to get on my nerve. Getting close to Alpas never came across my mind but he’s different. Unlike others, he didn’t talk behind my back and was perfectly blunt. He never feared nor condemned me because of the stories circulating. He never threw me a hostile gaze and always treated me the same way he treats his friends and strangers.

Then time passed, and unexpectedly... my feelings for him flipped from hatred to admiration.

I waited for him to take the book off his face and look at me, but all he did was a gesture for me to continue speaking. I paused for a moment to resist the nervousness that was creeping into my soul.

“I like you.” I bit my lower lips, uneasiness slowly eating me.

A few moments passed and the silence is killing me! The cool breeze of the wind brushes my skin making me feel my cold feet due to his confession. I have never been this nervous in my entire life despite being bullied and ostracized for a long time.

“I know,” he confidently answered. Not even batting an eye at me.

“T-That’s all!”

I was at a loss as to what I should do next and all I could think about is running away from this embarrassing situation but he suddenly held my wrist. What? What does he want?! How did he manage to hold my wrist without moving in his position?

In a panic, I blabbered without thinking. “I know, I know. Yes, I must be crazy. Everyone has told me that I am a wretched golddigger who does not deserve to even sneak a peek at you— a werewolf with a rich background. You deserve the real heiress of the SN Group and not some cheap stepdaughter who has just inherited the name of the Silver Night Pack because of her mother’s remarriage. But here I am suddenly proclaiming that I like you—”

Alpas pulled my wrist making me fall in his arms. He removed the book from his face and met my gaze. I could only blankly stare back at his beautiful sharp eyes. His golden eyes look warm, but when you look into them, they are as cold as ice. It felt like he just took away my breath effortlessly. Is he mad that I liked him? He's the only one who could make me feel this way.

I went on, “I’m sorry. Right. You’re the captain and the youngest leader of an elite special forces team. That beautiful pair of golden orbs are a sign of the prominent blood of Blood Moon Pack flowing through your veins. I know... you’re a man that a lowly werewolf like me mustn’t desire.”

My heart is racing like crazy, and butterflies are fluttering wild in my stomach, almost making me want to puke. My cheeks warmed up to my ears, yet I couldn’t take my eyes off of him. His orbs that looked like the sun were like a portal to the world that I want to be part of— it’s the biggest puzzle I want to solve. I’m sorry, I just can’t control these feelings even if I know they shouldn’t be. Even I, myself was surprised that I am capable of loving.

“You beat me to it, Rere,” he said, his face only inches from my face. I noticed the slight curve in his lips. “People were afraid of your emotionless cold gaze but you were the most honest person I ever met, that, I felt warmth in your clear words... I felt the walls surrounding my heart crumble one by one.”

“Y-You mean... you like me too?” I asked in disbelief.

This feels like a beautiful dream, I don’t want to wake up. I wasn’t really expecting anything in confessing to him. I just wanted the load in my heart to be lifted off.

“I do believe in ‘the more you hate, the more you love’." He chuckled after nodding. I blinked multiple times, unable to believe my ears. "Kidding aside though. The moment I first laid my eyes on you... I knew that the said cold-blooded step-daughter of Farkas from an exiled werewolf of Blackmark Pack wasn’t a ruthless winter witch, as frigid as ice that doesn’t melt. I suppose you were misunderstood because you were too honest and unpretentious. One of a kind in this society filled with expectations to be what kind of person we should be. So, I concluded that the rumors were just blatantly slanderous.”

I can feel my eyes water. I grew up with unkind gazes directed toward me without receiving anyone’s love, not even respect. I still couldn’t it, I already braced myself for being hurt and never being loved. I would’ve never imagined a guy like Alpas would reciprocate my feelings or even like me at all, I thought he hated me.

“I don’t care if you come from a wealthy family or not. I like you too... and that’s what matters, right?” He smiled before he planted his soft lips on mine, and it was as if my heart melted. “Starting now, just hold my hand without a care about what others say and never let go or give up on us. I swear to you we’ll make it to the end with our happily ever after because you will be, no, scratch that, you are my one and only Luna. Today and even in the future.”