Journal

Tears blurred my vision, seeing all the love he once had for me till I grew older. He was no longer in these videos and I was always alone. However, I wasn’t, because he was always somewhere, looking at me. I stopped having a smile on my face, I stopped being happy, I stopped running. That was after I was diagnosed and my father began to show his real self.

More videos of me came up and I was almost never happy. One hour later, it was still me, during graduation, during family dinner, during public functions, videos of me that were never even supposed to exist. And in all of them, though I was alone, my father was at a distance and his eyes were always on me. They were not cold, they were not harsh, simply a father staring lovingly at his son. These videos went on even till the day my heart failed and I was rushed to the hospital. He kept telling me that he would make it right, that it would be fine, that he would change it all.

Tears ran down my eyes when I realized that he knew ever