Did you ever ask yourself these questions?
Why does everyone I got close to leave me?
Am I the reason behind there departure?
Do I have a fatal disease that drive every person away from me?
Well, I never wondered such things until this moment.
I stood there looking at my one and only childhood friend, Tania, as she jokes and laughs with the most unexpected people, My bullies.
I made my way to the school entrance ignoring the stinging feeling in my heart. She got tired of me.
Is that a new feeling? No.
Did I expect that? absolutely yes.
I was always wondering when would she get tired of me and my pathetic excuse of a life. As they all did.
Everytime I think I made a friend, they leave and side up with 'them'.
Tania, was different. She was my savior, my shoulder to cry on, the person who always catch me before I fall.
She was my only hope, the person that cleans up my wounds after getting beaten up, she used to cry all night while looking at my miserable state.
Now, she left too. leaving me all alone in such a pathetic state. I wanted answers from her.
I wanted to cry ad shout at her, tell her what did I do for her to leave me like all the others, but I knew better.
Besides, Why would I let them know that they are getting to me?
If I cry, I will break down infront of the people that made me like this.
A coward.
It would be the thing that would bring the unbearable pain burried inside for 4 years, and he wouldn't be proud.
" Look, look, she is here" Shouted Melissa, the worst of them all.
Ignoring her, I carried on walking, hoping she will jsut let it go.
I stopped dead in my track when I felt something hard hit my head. I winced in pain.
I looked at the ground, seeing a rock fall down just below my feet.
Turning around, I was met with a completely different Tania.
Her face full of make up. she was wearing a tight short black skirt with a white t'shirt tucked inside, a black leather jacket to finish off the look, Her uncovered hair bouncing as she walked, the beautiful golden waves reaching her tiny waist.
I must admit she looked gorgeous. However, this wasn't her. This was a new Tania. The shy hijabist Tania was gone.
Just from the evil smirk she was holding, you can tell she changed, my Tania would never look at me like that.
She would never be disgusted by seeing me. Or hit me with a rock.
" Oh, look who decided to show up." she said eyeing me up and down, a look of disgust on her face, same buddy same.
I was just as disgusted as she was. Her outfit were way too revealing, her head scarf missing. She was way too better and more beautiful with her beautiful abayas.
Wearing hijab and pulling it off. I mean who does that?
" I guess you are too shocked that you forgot how to talk" she said taking a step towards me.
I rolled my eyes, and turned on my heals to leave.
" oops, I think I am not done with you yet" she said grabbing my hand, I brushed it off, only for her to grab my head scraf.
I turned around quickly.
" What's wrong with you?" I yelled, fixing my scarf. However, she didn't pull away.
She turned around to the group of girls she was with, smirking.
" Oh, you think I would always be that the pathetic friend of a piece of dirt like yourself?" She said, her attention on me now.
" Poor you, you think you are something special, huh? God, what was I thinking being a friend of a disgusting item like you."
Item?
I felt my heart break at her words, how could she be so mean after being the most amazing friend ever.
She was like a sister to me.
Oh god, please have mercy on me.
I bit my lip to stop tears to fall. I can't let her see me cry, not after showing her true colors.
" listen here, you bitch, don't look at me like that like you are the victim. Who can blame them? Do you not look at yourself in the mirror?" she said, making my heart break more than it already is.
Not her too. She can't be doing this.
" or, oh did your stepfather break it" she said mockingly, my eyes widened, she took it too far.
" Did I hit a nerf" she said smirking, I blinked once, twice.
I could not believe my ears.
NO, NO, No!!!!! my eyes sting, my heart aching, I felt sick, like I am about to faint.
How cruel would my life get?
Ignore Karima!! she doesn't deserve this, my subconcious told me;
I need to ignore her indeed.
I exhaled, turning around, only for her to take off my head scarf, I panicked.
This can't be happening, I hurried and covered my hair with my hands, tears streaming down my face now.
I shoot her a dangerous look. while all she did, was smirk, my scarf on one of the guys far away from me.
I hurried and ran toward him, oly for him to throw it to the ground stepping on it.
" You don't need it, your hair is beautiful" he said mocking me, they knew the meaning of it.
They knew I was a Muslim. They knew it was a necessity. Yet, they did this.
I fell to the ground my long honey hair falling from the bun.
I tried to yank the scarf from his feet, but I couldn't.
Many took off there phones recording the whole thing. While I was numb.
I deceived my god. everyone saw me and my hair.
everyone was laughing when I finally succeed to pull the scarf away from his feet, it dirty stained with dirt.
I pulled on my head, standing only to look at Tania, a smug look on her face.
" you will regret this, we both know you will" I said, running to the bathroom.
My heart beating fast, I felt like shit.
What I feared happened, Now everyone will see that, I am doomed.
Everyone was laughing at my weak state, some even recorded.My whole life I covered myself, now everyone saw my hair, saw me in such pathetic state.A coward, a crybaby.My hijab off.My whole life, I was nice to everyone, I helped anyone, never judged nor insulted anyone.Only because my precious god told us to do good to those who did bad to us and never stop at their level, it was the most painful punishment.Yet, all that people did is despise me, judge me, insult me. Why?Is it because I had no one to protect me?, or was it all a test from god?I never let anything get to me, not even when Melissa and her friends, beat me up.Not even when I saw my childhood friend with my enemies.However, this was inacceptable. They took it too far. *She* took it too far.I looked at my reflection i
"Where the hell did you get that scarf from?" He roared,There we go again."I-I- got this from a friend." I stuttered,I stopped to face him as I was midway through the stairs trying to go to my room without him noticing me, but guess what?Mission escape failed."From a friend? What friend huh? since when do you have friends, you worthless piece of shit?" He shouted making me flinch at his tone.His face and eyes were bloodshot, he was reeking of alcohol and he was angry. I started shaking in fear knowing I was doomed and there is no one to save me from his wrath.He will hit me again for sure.Ya Allah! When would all this stop?"It was from a classmate of mine..... s-since mine g-ot d-d-irty." I said slowly looking down, not daring to meet his furious calculative eyes.He chuckled darkly, his hoarse voice echoing through the whole empty house."It was from a guy, right?" He slurred, his words barely aud
"Strip,"I froze after hearing what the devil himself said.I didn't know what to or what to say. He smirked, pleased by my weak and vulnerable state. I hugged myself tighter, afraid.How to escape? What kind of sick joke is this?I raised my shaking eyes, daring for the first time to meet his fixing gaze. He stood there in all his glory, waiting for me to submit to his sinful demand. A tear slipped down my face, looking at the door, hoping, praying someone would come and save me from this shameless man in front of me."Don't you dare run, trust me, you will only make it worse for you," And I cried, fat tears started streaming down my pale face like a flowing river, not daring to stop.I knew too well what he was talking about; he was trying to steal away the innocence and pureness I was trying my entire life to protect. He wanted to discard me like a flower and leave me unwanted and dirty.I run to the door, trying to open it.
"Is it true?"She said, venom dripping from each word she mouthed.She looked at me her always sweet soft eyes that made me feel home and made me fight anything in order to see them always sparkling are now distant. She believed him the only liar in this room.Nothing can describe the panic and shock I was experiencing. This can't be happening.She was my mother; she was the only person I have; she is my only family. I can't stand losing her too.I shook my head, silent tears flowing down my face, not believing every bit that my own mother, the one that brought me to this cruel world, her own flesh and blood would think that low of me."Trust me, honey, she is lying, can't you see how reasonable is this, she must be too lonely, she doesn't even have friends," I stayed silent, "don't believe her tears, it's because I turned her down," Oh Ya Allah.I froze in my place waiting for my mother's reaction and then it hit me.Of
AYLAN:I looked outside my car's window, watching as people, cars, and trees pass before my eyes, The sun was setting taking my breath as its sun rays reflected on the green trees. It was so beautiful. I smiled, opening the window; I exhaled, closing my eyes lightly as the fresh air hit my face, the amazing scent hitting my nostrils. How beautiful nature is? How beautiful my home is?I can't help but think about how time flows fast, how life changes without us noticing, it feels just like yesterday when I had nothing to eat, no shelter and now look where I am. Happy, safe, and sound, with a lovely small family waiting for me home. I get what I want and even what I don't want, this is the secret of life, it turns and turns until we find ourselves in a whole new situation and state.My phone buzzed in my pocket with the Id "Mama" calling, I smiled answering the call."Hello, mo
"What do you mean I should go today?" I shouted at the guy in the other line."I am sorry, sir. It's for the sake of our organization.""You know it's my mother's birthday, how can I leave her?" I took a deep breath, calming myself down. It wasn't his fault. He is just my assistant, after all."Okay, call them back, and tell them I am coming. You can take the rest of the days off, Sarah will come with me." I told him, calmly. It was indeed a good thing. However, today is her birthday."What happened, sir?" Said Sarah, from beside me in the car.Sarah was my personal assistant, she is like a little sister to me. We prepared a whole surprise party for my mother. Now we will postpone it.I have other more important matters."We need to fly to France, Tonight,""Wow, that's a good thing, don't tell me they accepted your offer." She s
flashback:Amazing it is to have somebody you can rely on, to know that no matter how tough life gets you always have arms to run to without the fear of being judged or misunderstood.That person for me as most people in the universe is the one who brought to this world, my mother.I sank further into the back seat of my car, holding a small emerald box. A gift I brought for my mother dearest, the kindest of them all.She sacrificed her whole life and youth into raising the man I became today. She dressed me, fed me, and made sure I never lacked anything nor let me shed a single tear. The person who never thought of herself only me and my well-being.Today was her birthday, how excited I was to see her reaction to this little surprise we prepared for her.I rolled down the window and let the morning fresh air invade us. Me, my secretary and my driver/I don't understand why peo
He caught me off guard as he slung me on his back, effortlessly, like I was lighter than a feather. He let out some chuckles as I squirmed and never let him have his way. People watched, confusion, curiosity, and even disgust written on their faces. They wondered why would such a fine man carry a homeless girl like me. Me either. I felt my heart beat so fast; I was scared and also curious why he is doing this? However, I had no choice but to follow. What if he wasn't bad and is just trying to help? People still stared, they watched and saw how I slept in that dirty corner, all dirty with dust and mud; they witnessed how I ate those sandwiches I afforded to buy, like I never ate food my whole life, a week of suffering, agony, and pain. Guilt and dilemma were eating me. Did I do the right choice? Life turns and turns until we find ourselves in different situations, different places with different people, that's among life's secrets. It's too fake and