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25. She's Not Worth It
Last Updated:
2024-02-06 23:19:34Related chapters
Forever Jude 26. An Unexpected Goodbye
I walk into Simon’s apartment on Saturday afternoon to find him wrestling a jacket into a suitcase.“You are just in time,” he says, looking up at me. He’s kneeling on the carpet in front of the fully packed suitcase. “Come on, give me a hand.”“What are you doing?” I ask as I shove my shoes off and slip my feet into a pair of slippers. “Why are you here?” He’s supposed to be at Ben’s lake house, sweeping Keri off her feet.I get down on the carpet and hold down one side of the suitcase. With my help, he manages to zip it up. It’s a huge suitcase, and it’s full of clothes. “Are you going somewhere?”He nods and sits on the floor, raking his fingers through his hair. “Yeah,” he says. He sounds tired, and when I look around, I get an idea why. The room is in disarray and there is another suitcase on the bed. He has been packing. A lot.My eyes move back to him. “Are you moving?”He nods and reaches for a water bottle beside him. While he takes a drink, I ask, “Where? I thought you like
Last Updated : 2024-02-09Forever Jude 27. Hello Princess
On a Saturday morning two weeks after Simon leaves me fighting tears–unsuccessfully–outside the departure area, I’m sitting at the kitchen island, on a video call with Nicki.“What’s that on your neck?” she asks, making a gesture towards her own neck.I reach for my neck and raise my brow. “Like what?”“Like a hickey.” Nicki’s eyebrows pull together as she moves closer. “Wait…actually that looks more like a bite mark.” She sits back and wiggles her brow at me. “I suppose you are not taking it slow this time, uh?”I shake my head and wiggle a finger in the air. “Let’s not get sidetracked.”“Seriously, we need to get together ASAP! It’s been so long since we gossiped,” she whines.“We don’t gossip,” I say, popping a piece of apple into my mouth. She’s right, we need to get together. I didn’t get to hang out with her over the holidays because she went on a cruise with her boyfriend. And now, she’s busy with art school some six hours away.Nicki cocks her head, and her face is one big ‘s
Last Updated : 2024-02-12Forever Jude 28. You Left Me
“Cole’s back.”Those are the first words I say when I wake up the next morning. “Yeah, I figured that out from all the photos you sent me yesterday of you guys eating burgers, feeding ducks at the park, and riding roller coasters,” Jude says from right beside me, his voice groggy with sleep. “Did you enjoy the date?”Jude’s right, we did all that. We spent the entire afternoon yesterday as if we were making up for lost time–which we were. After stuffing ourselves with burgers, we went to the park where we sat and talked for hours and fed the said ducks. Then we went to an amusement park and went on several rides.Nobody would probably guess that’s how Cole chose to spend his first day out of prison. He’s more likely to go to a club, get piss drunk, and pick up girls. I’m pretty sure he’s working up to that.But yesterday, he was the Cole I got to know when I was eighteen after Jude left. He was the guy who did all sorts of things he normally wouldn’t just to bring a smile to my face
Last Updated : 2024-02-14Forever Jude 29. Thank You
My phone rings a few minutes later and I grab it quickly. It’s a strange number calling. I don’t waste time wondering who it could be before receiving it. “Hello?” “Hey, you need to come get your friend,” the person on the other side, a man, says.I get off the couch, frowning at the same time my pulse doubles. Is it Cole? Is it Jude? “My friend?”His voice becomes detached as he asks, “Hey, what’s your name?” A few seconds later, he says, “Name’s Cole. He’s outside Club Twenty on 7th Street.”He hangs up before I can ask any more questions. Not that there’s any need for that. Cole is outside Club Twenty on 7th Street, and I have to go get him.I hail a taxi and then rush into the bedroom to get dressed. I try to call Jude again, but his phone is still off. If he’s not with Cole, where is he?I head downstairs and wait in the lobby until my taxi arrives. The ride to the club takes twenty minutes, which seem like hours. Fortunately, the roads are clear at this hour, so there’s no del
Last Updated : 2024-02-16Forever Jude 30. Welcome to the Dark Side
Cole’s still asleep when I leave for work at around ten. I leave a note on the bedside cabin letting him know I’ll be back before one. I’m crossing my fingers that he won’t be gone when I get back. Given his state last night, he might end up sleeping through the entire morning. After my session with Brent, I head straight back home. The house is quiet when I get inside, but I notice Cole’s shoes in the entryway. However, I don’t breathe easy until I peep into the guest room and find him in bed. He’s awake, and his eyes shift to me as I step inside. “Hey,” I greet with a smile. He opens his mouth, but nothing comes out. He clears his throat and tries again. “Hey.” It comes out rough. I can’t help laughing. “You sound like a dying rat.” “...right.” He is saying ‘you are right’, but only the last word comes out loud enough. He rubs his eyes and yawns, then throws his head back into the pillow and groans. “I’m guessing you are not feeling so hot,” I say. The water and the pills I l
Last Updated : 2024-02-19Forever Jude 31. She is Fucking Crazy
Cole’s ‘just something small’ that won’t take long turns into a sleeve tattoo. He’s only getting a section done today, and so far it has taken two hours. That’s not counting the time it took to come up with the design together with the artist. Jude calls a little past eight. He’s gotten back home and is wondering where the hell we are. “Did he sell you to one of his shady contacts?” he asks when I pick up.“We are doing something,” is all I say, not wanting to ruin the surprise. “We’ll get back a bit later.”“What are you doing?”“You’ll see.”I decided to get a tattoo of our initials like Jude’s, and the artist worked on mine first because it was a quick job. “Have you guys had dinner yet?” he asks.“No.”“Is Chinese okay?”“Yeah.”“Alright,” he says. After a short pause, he asks, “You guys are not doing anything illegal, are you?”I chuckle. “Have a little faith in the man, will you?”“What’s he saying?” Cole asks.Jude hears that. “Tell him to mind his own business.”“I miss you
Last Updated : 2024-02-23Forever Jude 32. A Midnight Proposal
Jude finds us in the hospital. Or me, rather. I'm in the ER waiting room while Cole's inside having his numerous injuries tended to.He rushes over when he spots me. I get up too fast and a sharp pain travels through my abdomen. If he didn't wrap his arms around me at that moment, I would have fallen back into my seat."You are okay. You are okay." He says the words like a chant to reassure himself that I'm indeed okay. But I don't think I am. I mean, I thought I was until I got up a second ago. It must have been the adrenaline masking the pain, because now, I feel like something in my abdomen is broken. Or squashed. Jude pulls back, and without his arms holding me up, I crumple back into the chair like rubber.Panic crisscrosses his face and he reaches for me. "What's wrong?"I place a hand over my stomach and wince. "I don't know."I do, though. He reaches for my blouse and pulls it up a bit. He doesn't like what he sees. He whirls, looking around. "Hey, someone's hurt," he yells
Last Updated : 2024-02-26Forever Jude 33. The Power Of Love
When I wake up in the morning, the bruise on my stomach is a mix of deep purple and black. It’s also a bit painful. I lay in bed for a while, letting everything from last night rush through my head.I look at the empty space next to me. Jude said he had an early morning, so I’m guessing he already left. I didn’t hear him get up, and I always do. It doesn’t matter what time he gets up, but I always end up awake at that time too. It’s like my body has a warning system to make sure I don’t miss him before he goes.I must have really been winded last night to miss him this morning.I drag myself out of bed and into the bathroom. After that, I head to the kitchen in search of caffeine and an ice pack.I stand still in our bedroom’s doorway when I see Jude sitting at the sparsely used dining table, holding a steaming cup in one hand and his phone in the other. He looks up when I show up.“Morning,” he says.I stare at him like he’s an alien invader for a few seconds. I thought he had left.
Last Updated : 2024-02-28
Latest chapter
Forever Jude 44. Will You?
Jude’s POV“No,” I say, reaching out and wiping her tears away. Cole’s right. I’m an asshole. Shithead. Dumbass. As if I haven’t made her cry enough times. After everything I’ve put her through, I should spend the rest of my life making up for it by making her smile every single day. Instead, I go and do this.Her eyes fall shut, and her body trembles as she takes a deep breath. I jump to action, pulling the comforter over her.“What are you doing?” she asks, confusion palpable in her voice. Her eyes remain closed.“I don’t want you to be cold.” I sound lame even to myself.Her throat moves as she swallows. Her eyes open and stare right into mine. They are shiny with tears but lacking their usual brightness. “Do you hate me?”I blink. What? Why would she–Yeah, right, buddy. Why would she ask that? Can’t possibly think of any reason.So it isn’t working for you?No.Like a bona fide idiot.“No.”“Then why…” she trails off and lifts her hand to her face. She covers her eyes, but I can
Forever Jude 43. On the Outside
Jude’s POVTen minutes, fifteen seconds.That’s how long it’s been since she left.She must be gone by now, right?It’s too late to go after her.How fast can I get a boat, and how fast can I get to the mainland? Maybe they’ll be delayed before leaving on the plane. Maybe the plane needed refuelling, or is awaiting clearance.It’s only been ten…eleven minutes. I can catch up. I can catch up and take back every stupid thing I just said.God, what the fuck is wrong with me?Everything.I groan and bump my forehead against the window. That was the right thing to do. It was the right thing to do. It was the–A knock on the door interrupts my mantra. I straighten instantly, my heavy heart racing. That’s her, right? She is back to give me a piece of her mind. She is not the kind to walk away without a word.I race to the door like I didn’t tell her to basically get out of my life twelve minutes ago. I open the door.My excitement dies the moment I see Cole’s face.What is he doing here? Did
Forever Jude 42. Living in a Dream
An hour later, we are in the plane, taking off. It’s a forty five minute flight to the coast, then we’ll take a boat to the island where they are filming.Fortunately, it’s such a small island that it only has three hotels. The second hotel that I called asking to leave a message turned out to be the one he’s staying at. I’ll figure out how to get to him when we get there. “So, he told you about Claire?” Cole asks me after takeoff.“Not much,” I say. “We ran into her at a hotel at the coast three months ago. He told me they have history.” “I can’t believe he has been working with her all this time,” Cole says.“What happened back then?” I ask him. The fact that Cole agreed with the necessity of this impromptu trip means he agrees with me that an inebriated Jude cannot be left alone with Claire. Jude insisted that Claire did not take advantage of him, but if Cole’s reaction is anything to go by, I must have been right. “I don’t think it’s my story to tell,” he says.“Did he swear y
Forever Jude 41. I'll Take Care of Him
“Nothing!” I blurt out, turning around to face Jude. He is standing in the doorway, his gaze switching from me to Cole. Shit. Did I not close the door? How long has he been standing there?Jude’s brows pull together. “Are you talking about Brent Harvey?”“What? No!” I deny. “We were just…just–”“You were,” he says, his eyes narrowing. He walks into the room. He gestures to his phone and addresses Cole. “Did you do this?”“No,” Cole says.“But you know who did.”Cole shrugs. “Maybe.”Looks like we are both terrible liars. At least I tried.“And what does it have to do with Jo?”“Nothing,” I say.Jude looks at me. “Is that so? What business does Cole have with him that has nothing to do with you?”I cross my arms over my chest. “It doesn’t matter anymore.”“What doesn’t matter anymore?” Jude asks.“He was an asshole to her, and I taught him a lesson, that’s all,” Cole says.“A lesson,” Jude deadpans. “He might never play ball again.”“What do you care?” Cole asks. “Are you a fan?” Jude
Forever Jude 40. The Wrong Woman
I want Cole to keep driving and driving until we are as far away from here as possible, but he pulls over barely a minute later.I can’t even tell him to keep going because I’m crying too hard to form words. He brings the car to a complete stop, which makes my sobs the only thing either of us can hear. I tried really hard to not cry, but once the tears started flowing, there was no going back. The little strength I was using to hold myself together turned out to be nothing compared to the emotions that hit me as soon as I was in the safe cocoon of the car.I’m hiding my face behind a tissue I plucked earlier, not wanting to face Cole.“Jo, what happened?” Cole asks, his voice tense and full of concern.I shake my head. There’s a throb at the back of my head from where I hit the floor earlier, and my cheek is stinging with pain. The hand he grabbed isn’t working too well either. I can’t squeeze it right when I try to blow my nose.I discard that tissue and press my palms to my face. C
Forever Jude 39. Just Drive
Someone steps forward and offers to take Brent’s coat. I use the chance to look for an escape route. I spy a crowd of people milling around a room to the right. Other guests emerge or disappear through an opening to the left.“You look very beautiful tonight,” Brent’s voice draws my attention back to him. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in a dress before.”“Well, a tracksuit is hardly suitable for the occasion,” I say, forcing a smile onto my lips. I need someone to show up right now and steal his attention. I’m quite sure a lot of people will be all over him tonight, so can they hurry up?When I mentioned the invitation to Jude, he was worried about me running into Brent. But Brent took my job rejection well, and I did not think that would be an issue. Besides, we are in a house full of people. It’s the ideal setting to firmly turn him down if he brings it up.“No, it’s not,” he agrees, taking a step forward. He extends his hand, intending to touch me again. I step back just in ti
Forever Jude 38. If You
“Jo, let me go.”I shake my head and squeeze my arms tighter around Jude’s middle, fighting against his attempt to remove them. “No.”“Do you want me to miss my flight?” he asks.“Yes. That’s exactly what I want,” I reply. “You are not going anywhere.”“I’m fine, I swear.”I shake my head. “You are not.”The last thing I expected when I woke up this morning was to find Jude getting ready to leave for work. He was in a daze when we got back to the condo last night. In bed, he tossed and turned all night. I was too worried to sleep, but the fatigue caught up with me around four in the morning. Thank heavens I woke up when I did because I would have lost my shit if he’d been gone.“I know what happened last night must have been scary,” he starts.I huff. “You think?”“But it’s perfectly normal,” he continues.Yeah, and he must be out of his mind.“I mean it was a perfectly normal reaction to that kind of thing rushing into my brain out of nowhere,” he adds. “It blindsided me. T-boned m
Forever Jude 37. Good Enough
“Hey, have you see this boy around here?” Jude asks the owner of one of the only two stores still open at the local shopping centre.The man looks at the photo of Rico on Jude’s phone and shakes his head. “No.”Jude nods and puts his phone away. “Alright, thanks.”We move towards the exit of the shop and stop under the eave because it’s suddenly raining. As if this night couldn’t get any shittier. Where do we look next? Between us, the police, and a couple of Rico’s neighbours who volunteered, we’ve searched the entire neighbourhood. If Rico was anywhere nearby, someone should have spotted him by now. Jude sighs heavily, his breath condensing in the night air. “What, now?”I shove my hands in my jacket pockets and try to think of somewhere we should check but haven’t yet. Nothing comes to mind. We’ve been to every public place we could be. The only alternative now is to broaden the scope of our search area. When we started this search, I was optimistic that we would soon find Rico
Forever Jude 36. Cheesy, creamy?
Back to Jo’s POV“This means you are not working with him anymore, right?”I look up from the container I’m filling with leftover food and over at Jude, who’s standing in front of the TV holding the remote. “What?”He gestures to the screen with the remote. “Him.”My eyes rise to the screen, where footage of Brent Harvey from today’s game is playing. It was his first game back after his injury, and he performed quite well. “Um,” I mumble, switching my eyes back to the container. When I turn to stow it in the refrigerator, I say, “I might still be.”Might? I’ve already accepted the offer, it’s just that I’ve not signed a contract yet.And yes. I haven’t mentioned it to Jude yet. “What?” he asks, his voice full of confusion. “He’s fully recovered, right?”I turn back around to find him raising his brow at me. “Yes. But he offered me to become his full-time personal trainer.”That brow raises further. “What?”“I accepted.”“Why would you do that? You said you would only work with him f
