SCOTTI thought I had gone past this.But here I am falling into the same abyss that caused me my sanity a few years ago.How could I have known that this little fun will get here, will bring back memories of Lucile.My Belle, My Lucille.I get off the bed and cork my head to the side to look at the two girls sleeping soundly on the bed, and I cannot wait to get rid of them.I needed to get her off my mind, but it didn't work.It's been two days since that night by the pond.Now here I am battling between the thoughts of two women, not sure whose memory I want to erase.I didn't bargain for this, it was just supposed to be a one night fling.Walking to the bathroom, I turn on the shower and let the cold icy splash caress my skin.Long hours with the girls doing all they could do best but still didn't get the release I desperately needed. I still felt heavy with unquenched lust, and I knew I couldn't sleep better if I didn't remedy that.Who am I kidding? I know for sure that I would n
CAMILLEWhat the hell is he doing here? And at this time too?I check the time on my cell phone to be sure and it's really just six twelve in the morning.Who even let him in?And why is he talking to...Oh my god! I hurry over to James' side to see if he is really awake. But just like everyday of the past two months, he is still unconscious and looks just as pale as always.So who the hell was he talking to? I know for sure that I didn't imagine the voice when I walked in.I turned my full gaze on him and waited for his response, but when he didn't say anything but just stared at me like a child caught right in the act of doing something wrong, I had to directly ask?'What are you doing here and who let you in here this early? Who were you even talking to? Are you one of those crazy dudes?'I take a break from my questions and wait for him to start answering, and it better be convincing enough.'Okay, I definitely have to answer that one at a time, where do I start from?' he opens h
CAMILLE'We shouldn't be doing this' I manage to whisper between labored breaths as his free hand cups my breasts and squeezes it roughly. His other hand still holds mine firmly to his chest.'You mean this?' he whispers to my neck before his warm tongue meets the skin below my ear, and I gasp with need.His fingers find my nipples through my chiffon shirt and knead them without mercy, just the way I love it – rough. When he pinched it, I let the moan I had been trying to keep in my throat out.I try to look at James, make sure he's not awake, but he seizes my face in a deep kiss. It seizes every ounce of air I had left in me.I don't give it a thought before I open my mouth to welcome his roaming tongue, it feels perfect, it is domineering and impatience.And I love it.The world blurs out and the only thing that exists is him and I, and of course, the dampness between my thighs that makes me think I have wet myself.But I didn't, it's all him making my body respond to his perfectio
SCOTTI felt so excited until I got home.Doubt creeped into me once I was back to my personal space.What if she doesn't show up? What if her reaction was just a spur of the moment and now she will think about it and realize that this might all be a mistake?I really do hope not.I reach for my phone on the side table which I had left at home to distract my mind from the thoughts which are unsettling me now.But what I see does nothing to quell my unease?Eight missed calls from my assistant and loads of messages from the said assistant and probably others.What's going on? they couldn't keep the forte just for a little while until I got back?It's just been a month, what if I went on a year's vacation?I do not bother to read the messages but go ahead to call Jake – my poky nosy assistant who has been on my neck about how New York has been and wants to know who is keeping me back since I already confirmed James status.I do hope that's not the reason for these calls or he will never
CAMILLEThis feels so wrong.But it doesn't stop me from pulling up in the parking lot and finding my way to the hotel's lobby.I have never been anywhere so magnificent, and I am sure whoever is spending the night here must be loaded, talk more of spending a month.Who is he?Is he some lowkey hair or business mogul?Or is he a trafficker?The very thought of it sends shivers down my spine, but that's what I am here to find out by the way.That and to coax him into telling me more about the deal with James.Look at you Cam, chasing men and money now, the perfect example of a wild gold digger aren't you?I bury that thought in the deep recesses of my mind and think instead of how positively this will help me, it's only a matter of time before we run dry on cash and the last thing I want to do is bring a child into the bad situation I currently am in financially.I can't have that.Other than a judgemental look from the receptionist when I show her the card, getting access to the vip s
CAMILLEThis man is set to undo me, and I am letting him.I do not even have enough time to decipher the meaning of that look before he crushes his lips to mine in a whirl of passion.He throws every gentleman and nice guy's behavior in the wind as he seizes my lips, tasting and sucking, seeking and dominating, biting and crushing.And I let him, I welcome him with a willing mouth.In a quick sweep I am in his arms with my legs wrapped around his waist, and he is leading me to a place I do not want to know.Right now I do not mind who he is or what he plans to do to me. I have willed myself completely to him.I had long waited for this moment without knowing it, and once my back meets the soft sofa I had earlier vacated, I waste no time running my hands down to the hollow of his abdomen, and he groans into my mouth.'You can't wait, can you miss Parker?''Not when you call my name like that' I say between raspy breathing.'What do you want me to call you? Camille?' presses his bulge i
SCOTTThis feels good.This is the best I have felt in a long time, and the way she gives me absolute control and claims me as well? Amazing.Our skin is wet with sweat, and it is only then we realize how hot the atmosphere is without the ac on.She seems to read my thoughts then and we laugh together.Our synced laughter creates a melody I want to remember all my life.I pull out of her and kiss her forehead before tucking myself in and going off to turn on the air conditioner.I notice how she closes her legs when I get up and wrap her arms around her tummy, and if I hadn't just witnessed her screaming my name again and again, I would say she is shy to expose herself to me that way.Instead of returning the courtesy of calling her own name or shutting up altogether, I called someone else's name.What sort of a douche-bag does that?Luckily, she thinks I had forgotten her name and even corrected me.Who am I to tell her there is really a Lucille?it is better the idea of me forgettin
CAMILLE.I wish she would just see things as they are.She wouldn't tell me about the bruises around her eyes which her heavy makeup does not hide at all, but I know he has been hitting her.This isn't the first time, but only once had she come clean to tell me about it, adding that it was a mistake and it was all her fault.I sit silently with her while I wait for the nurses to attend to James and excuse us, and I weigh my thoughts and ponder on the best way to approach this without making her feel more terrible than she already feels.I sit Emma on my legs and coo her to sleep. Her tiny hands are wrapped around mine so tightly until I start to feel it loosen slowly.How do we tell your mama that she has to suck it up and choose to live for you and your brother? My mind whispers as I coo, wishing that the little baby will telepathically give me an answer, give every one of us an answer to our fucked up situations.'What are you going to do now?' I ask minutes after the nurses have le
CAMILLEI need to get out of here.I need to get away from all this mess.But where do I go, that his memory won't go with me. What privacy will I get if he is stuck in my mind like this?I even carry him in my womb, how about that?It's a good thing Charlotte is here, she can decide to take care of her brother or bail on him again, but for me I need to leave this place.I ignore her calls as I get up to leave as I have no valid explanation to give.What will I say?I have been having sex outside my marriage with no other person but your cousin. Not only that I happen to also be pregnant for him.If I had not earned enough name in their book then “brother fucker” seems like a good name.How do I even say that the pain I feel right now is partly because I wish he was here with me, that I didn't kick him out the way I did.Gosh, this is so fucked up.I take in a long breath once I am outside the hospital, filling my empty lungs with breath, trying to remind them just how to inhale and e
SCOTTShe had no right to do that.I understand that she is tense at the moment but shrugging me off like that was very uncalled for.It hurt me pretty bad.I was already dealing with the jealousy and envy brewing in me as I watched her go crazy over another man. I can not stand her giving me the cold treatment too like it is my fault.No matter how much she wants to blame someone for the turn of events it should not be this way.She made up her mind to go out with me, to keep seeing me, and irrespective of my past track records I never for one moment forced her into anything at all she didn't want.By the way I should be the one who is mad at her after that outburst about her husband. I should be pissed that she did not tell me earlier until she said it out loud to the nurse out of frustration.But I guess I was not so surprised considering that I already knew a long time ago.So where is this coming from?I should be heading home, at least I have driven her here as I had planned an
CAMILLE I would be grateful if he left. It has been more than an hour of moving from one room to another to run blood tests and not once did I catch sight of Scott. He must have taken the hint when I shrugged him off and left. But his absence disturbs me and every once in a while I will look around to see if he is somewhere in the corner. Maybe if Helen is here with me I would not be so concerned about Scott. Right now I just need company, someone to assure me that everything will be alright and pretty soon too. The results do not take long to come out and just as I had feared, it turned out negative. I had already placed a call to Charlotte - one of James' sisters – to come in urgently and she had ended the call with a promise to be here in twenty minutes. Thirty-five minutes gone and I wish I had never called her in the first place. While I scroll aimlessly through my phone, I catch a familiar scent I have come to know so swell and my heart registered his presence
CAMILLEI tried to steady my hands as I scurried towards the restroom, but it shook so badly that I could not open the door.A hand covered mine on the door knob and opened the door, and the relief that gave me was short-lived once I opened the door and peered in only to find it empty.I run into the hallway towards the nurses unit, my mind so occupied with several thoughts that I actually run past a nurse until she calls me back.I hurry back towards her and hold her arms firmly while I barrage her with questions, not sure how firmly until Scott puts his hands on mine again and looks at me, his eyes instructing me to stay calm.'Where is he, is he okay?' My voice trembled so badly that I wondered if it really did belong to me.'I was wondering where you went and when you will be back Mrs Parker'. She cast a suspicious stare between Scott and I but I did not let my mind dwell on that for long.'I just went out to grab a couple of things, my bad''You were gone since last-' 'Are you g
CAMILLESleep for the first time eludes me.I stayed awake instead to admire that prince charming in front of me until it got too late and I remembered my husband.Shit! I have been away for more than twenty-four hours. I need to head back now.I scuffle from his hold and search for new clothes in my wardrobe.I have not done laundry in a while and everything stinks.SHIT!'Where are you going?' Scott's sleepy husky voice calms my nerves and disturbs me as well, making me remember the dream I had – too bad that it qualifies for a nightmare.His voice calls to me and I wish I could hurdle back in his arms as long as I can, and enjoy this abominable thing we share.It is hard to tell why I am really attracted to him, why I feel the way I do with him in a way I have not felt with anyone else. Not even James.Maybe I am just drawn to him because he is my baby daddy, or because he is just so damn cute and irresistible.'I have to get to the hospital' he groans in response and I feel a litt
CAMILLEnever come across a man who is so jealous and scared to lose me.Maybe James would be if he finds out another man is making his wife feel things in a way she has not felt with him.Maybe we were just so focused on ourselves and our family, and never thought about what it would look like if someone else came between us.But this man knows me for less than two months and he can't stand the thought of another man close to me.It makes me want him in ways I have never wanted anyone else. It makes me want to surrender myself to him and assure him that I am all his, and his alone.But I can't.His eyes widened in curiosity of what I want to do as I straddle him, this is not the reply he expected.I can't tell him what he wants to hear because I am sealed to someone else in holy matrimony, but I will show him what could have been if I was not.Damn it Camille, there is nothing holy about what you have been doing since you met this guy or what you are about to do.I slowly roll up his
SCOTTWhat happened to my pride?I have got an older woman shooing me away like some child and instead of getting real pissed and going away I just stand at the bottom of the stairs and watch her disappear upstairs.Shit! Someone tell me what I am doing?Am I losing it again? Did all those months of therapy really didn't add up to anything at all?I take a deep breath and look around the room to see if anything might interest me.Wait a minute, I am here now, in James house.Instead of waiting on her to spill whatever she knows I could do a little scavenging of my own and maybe I might really find something worthy enough.I take in the room again, but everything looks normal and in place, making it hard for me to decide where to start from.It gives off nothing like a room where someone could hide things.Maybe if I could get to their room.Secrets lie in closets right?Now how do I get there? If only I could-'Hey, can you give me a hand here? I am stuck' she calls from somewhere rig
SCOTT It should not bother me but it does. 'So who is this guy?' I finally ask after what seems like decades of driving in silence while avoiding her eyes. I can feel her gaze on me, and I can feel her lips tilting up in a smile and then I hear her laugh. It made me feel stupid, like I was foolishly chasing after something I can never have, but it did not stop my heart from aching to know everything about her, every detail. Yes, my heart. That organ has been doing a lot of fluttering and racing recently for this one woman who is laughing at me seriously right now. 'Is someone jealous?' she asks between laughs and I want to pull up and show her how damn jealous and serious I am. 'Should I be?' I ask, with no trace of a smile to show that I may be kidding. She looks at me long and hard with traces of that smile on her face and only then do I look back to see if anything on her face will give her away, but the woman is as strong as a shield. She does not say anything t
SCOTTI have never seen anyone dress up so posh just to go shopping.And I love it.Everything about how she's dressed makes me feel damn special.She took her time to look good for me, and something about that makes my blood warm with desire.She is wearing a black loose jumpsuit that is only fitted around her ass, with those shiny black open toe heels she wore on the night we went to the coffee shop.Her hair. I have never seen them so wavy and fuller, sweeping down both sides of her face in curly waves. She moves some behind her ears so – I dare to say, I – can have a view of that smooth long neck of hers.Gosh, I want to claim those lips here and now. Red and domineering, I do not mind being under her spell right now.She is not just beautiful, she's gorgeous, man! Cleopatra has got nothing on this woman.Looking at her now and I do not even remember she's - what? Four or is it five years older than me.I can perceive her fragrance even when she's still a couple of steps away fro