Chapter 3 Behind Closed Doors

Blakely’s POV

I know I’m trapped and there's no way to escape the hell where Nik trapped me. He's the king of this hell and I'm scared I’d lose myself as he played with my heart and soul like a devil, enjoying my misery and suffering. I don’t know what he’s planning, but I can feel that it’s not good. It’s as if he only came back to torment me and because I did stupid things twice, I have no choice but to obey him.

Nik slowly stepped backward as he eyed me like a predator, enjoying his trembling prey and a playful smile curved on his lips. His smile was deceiving and only I could feel its mischief. I remained watching him until he disappeared from my sight and that's only when I released the breath I was holding in.

He’s gone. He’s gone so fast that it felt like an illusion but the beat of my heart proves that it’s not.

“Blakely!” Stan held my hand and caressed my back. “Are you okay, love?”

I forced a smile and nodded at him. “Y-Yeah… I’m just…kinda tired.”

“Auntie–Mama, I’d like to bring Blakely to the presidential suite since she's already tired.”

Somehow, I'm thankful to Stan for saying that. Mama and Papa immediately gave us their approval and Stan brought me to the presidential suite, caressing my waist as he held me close.

“Thank you, Stan,” I said as soon as we entered the presidential suite. “For defending me back there at the party.”

He looked at me with affection as he held my hand. “It’s my duty to protect you, Blakely. I am your future husband, so I will protect you no matter what.”

I smiled and nodded at him. His eyes dropped on my lips and I saw how he swallowed before he looked into my eyes again. “Blakely, can I…kiss you?”

Kiss? My heart hammered inside my chest. A part of me wanted to say no but I remembered how mama fiercely reminded me of how I should make Stan happy as my future husband. Just a kiss, right?

Slowly, I nodded and he claimed my lips. His kisses were gentle, slow, and sweet. It’s the total opposite of the kiss I shared with Nik last night.

I opened my mouth when I felt Stan wanting it to part and then his kisses suddenly changed. He started kissing me like a starved animal as he pinned my hands against the closed door which really surprised me. I was shocked and frozen for a few seconds.

“Fck! I waited so long for this, love…” he whispered as he continued kissing me like crazy.

I felt his hand caressing my inner thighs as his kisses went down to my jaw and neck. My heart immediately raced inside my chest, realizing what he wanted to happen tonight. Fear consumed me as I remembered the way Nik kissed me last night. He answered my kisses last night and the taste of his lips was still vivid in my memory.

“S-Stan—”

“Shh! Relax…” He stopped kissing me and gently pressed his forefinger against my lips. His eyes are blazing with desire and I know I can no longer stop him now. It’s too late.

He smiled gently. “Don't worry, love. I’ll be very gentle since I know this is your first time and we’re now engaged. It’s only natural.”

I nodded and Stan smiled before kissing me on the lips which I suppose excited him even more because I felt the growing tent on his pants against my belly.

Something is wrong. It's with me…

My eyes squeezed even tighter as Stan continued kissing my neck and Nik’s face flashed in my mind. His touch…his kiss…his sinful lips…his rude pierced tongue…his sharp words… My lips parted after I trembled in pleasure as memories of how we kissed last night flashed in my mind.

My lips parted just when Stan was about to touch my most sensitive spot, his phone rang, interrupting us. “Stan…”

“Shh!” He whispered and showered kisses all over my neck again.

His phone continued ringing as I tried to convince him to answer it. Must be an important call knowing how persistent the caller is.

“Fcking shit!” Stan cursed and angrily grabbed his phone.

He answered the call, listening to the person on the other line so intently before he squeezed his eyes closed and ended the call. He caressed my cheek and kissed me hard on the lips before he let go and stared at me apologetically. “I have to go, love. I have something to take care of.”

Swallowing hard, I nodded obediently. He picked up his coat and left as I panted heavily.

It was supposed to be his work number. Thank God. Anyway, the call rescued me.

After Stan left, I fell on my knees like a jelly, feeling so weak and confused. My hands trembled as I fixed my clothes and left the hotel as if I was drunk and totally spent.

I’ve lost my mind! Why am I longing for his touch and the way he handled me? Why do I think about Nik when it’s Stan I was kissing?

My thoughts are so messy and I need to organize them before I lose my mind. I went back to my apartment, the one I bought after I had my first job. It wasn't big and just big enough for me. Mama didn't approve of it and Papa managed to help me convince her. But in return, I should never ever disobey them in any way.

I entered my apartment and went straight to the locked room, unlocking it with the key I was hiding in my bag.

As soon as the light flooded the room, my stupid feelings for Nik came to life as pictures and paintings of him flashed in front of me.

The wall full of his pictures seemed full of life and I couldn't help but think why I couldn't get over him. Well, maybe because I don't really want to forget my feelings. It's all in here. Inside this room. Hiding and safe.

I couldn’t…forget the kiss. The taste of his lips. His rough way when he kissed back and touched me.

No, what's hidden shouldn't be found out. Stop it now, Blakely! Please, you have Stan, you have to be honest with him, Stan's great and kind. He's always treated me with respect, he's allowed me to continue to work after my marriage, he's always kind to me, and here I am thinking about another man while I’m with him.

My phone interrupted my thoughts. I opened it and received a message from my friend Rachel. She sent me a message with a picture attached to it.

My hands trembled and my heart ached after I saw a photo of Rachel and Nik. His face was buried in Rachel's neck but I know it's him. I know him too well.

‘Guess who's with me? He's inviting me to his condo, Blakely. Would you mind?’

A rebellion raised in my heart as I stared at the photo. I wanted to throw my phone and slam it against the wall while my heart ached like crazy. Another message came from the same sender.

‘Nik told me to ask you since he doesn't want to ruin our friendship. I hope you don't mind, Blakely. Your brother is so hot!’

He just…played with me. Of course!

My heart bleed as I typed in a message, telling Rachel to do whatever she wanted to do with him and I didn't care.

I was almost breathless when I cupped my forehead and bit my bottom lip. He treated me like nothing. He kissed back last night, but he’s now ready to hook up with my friend. I felt played. I feel jealous. This is ridiculous!

I should forget him completely. I know from the very beginning that we will never happen. He’s forbidden. However, deep down I knew I hated why my heart was still beating for him even after everything. The unexpected kiss we shared last night shattered all my plans. I could have forgotten about him, accepting the truth that he would never be mine but after last night, how could I forget him? Just…how?

'Stop this, Blakely!' I warned myself, shaking my head. 'Don't let your stupid obsession poison your mind any longer!'

‘You're already engaged! You can't fail Stan anymore!'

I drank all the water and realized it was not enough to calm me down. Whatever happened last night, I should forget it. Nothing will work out between Nik and me. I was already engaged with Stan and all I needed to do now was to get over my adoptive brother and focus on my own life.

My eyes found the photos and paintings. This is probably the reason why I couldn’t forget him. Because I’m still keeping my illusion of having him to look at me like a woman.

I felt suffocated as I gathered all the paintings and photos and decided to burn them. The fire eating the surviving trace of my illusion of having my adoptive brother was suffocating to watch. I feel like I’m burning a part of me and I can't do anything because it’s for the best.

Suddenly, a warm liquid rolled down my cheeks. I wiped them and scolded myself. Why am I crying over paintings and photos? God! This is ridiculous!

The heaviness in my heart didn’t subside as I busied myself by cleaning the room that was once locked and a witness to my helpless one sided love.

DING_DONG

When the doorbell rang, I thought it was Stan, so I pulled the door open. I almost dropped my own heart on the floor when I saw Nik standing in front of my house. His eyes were dark and dangerous, and immediately met mine. He smelled heavily of alcohol.

My lips parted in shock as I stared at him with eyes widening. But…wasn't he with Rachel?

“N-Nik…”