Chapter 1: His new Luna.

Each thrust of Nikolai’s hips sends a wave of hot pleasure right through me. 

I writhe, my hands clenching the sheets, back arched and my eyes rolling into the back of my head… “Right there, Niko.”

For a moment, it’s like a fever dream. Nikolai’s hands are fisted on the mattress, keeping me locked in place as his heat wraps us both. His scent of sea salt and lavender surrounds us in a soft haze and though we’re both covered in a shiny sheen of sweat, because of his scent I feel clean and fresh, the woody notes of lavender taking me to a cabin and the sea salt transporting me to a beach.

I feel each limb in my body begin to tingle. I’m so close. Just a bit more.

A phone rings and yanks me away from my climax. 

Nikolai curses under his breath but the buzz of his phone is a constant vibration echoing through the room. He picks the call and though it’s not on loudspeaker I hear each word of the guard’s report.

 

“The new Luna has arrived at the borders, Alpha Nikolai. Her envoy should be at the packhouse soon.”

Nikolai grunts harshly as he pushes away from the bed, pulling out of me roughly and getting ready to leave. My heart shudders with pain and an emotion of hurt lances through me but i try to put on a brave face.

I struggle to smile, but i can’t. Not when i know he’s never going to be mine again the moment he leaves me and walks out that door.

I gather the last bit of bravery in me and ask, “What… what if I wasn't even here at all?” 

The words slip out of my mouth in a soft whisper. 

I don’t want to be a third wheel in Nikolai’s marriage to his chosen Luna. I’m just… a fated mate who can’t offer him anything, but maybe I can leave. Leave and totally disappear from his life.

Nikolai’s blue-green eyes darken with displeasure, “You want to leave?”

His voice resonates with authority and confidence, everything I'll never be. I nod and Nikolai scoffs, shrugging on his shirt as he responds.

“Where the fuck would you even go?” He sneers at me, “You’re nothing without me, Emery. You can’t take care of yourself. Even in this big house, all you do is complain all day.”

Nikolai’s words sting like the scald from an iron. I shake my head because I do NOT complain. As his acting Luna, I’ve worked my ass off handling pack issues no one else will deal with. I sleep later than everyone else in the packhouse…. Even the maids, so what is he talking about?

None of the cruelty leaves Nikolai’s tone though as he continues, “Your sister’s hospital expenses are all cared for by me, and you can’t provide for yourself talk less of a child. Letting you go would just lead to you bringing disgrace to me so sit the fuck down, and be silent. You’re getting more than you ever deserve.”

Nikolai has been antsy for a while now so i know it could be all that anger he’s directing at me yet tears roll down the side of my face as I ask in response, “It was for nothing then?” All the pain i’ve been trying to suppress seems to flow freely into me and leaks out of my voice as i look at him and ask, “These three years of waiting to be marked as your mate and Luna, they were for nothing?”

Nikolai doesn’t spare me a glance or respond, he knots his tie and leaves an order as he heads to the door, “Clean yourself up and look presentable. Your new Luna is on the way.”

I feel my heart shatter into a thousand tiny pieces, and a flood of emotions overcome me.

Bitter anger and blatant defeat. 

Humiliation… and shame. So much shame.

 

Just because he sleeps with me doesn’t make me his Luna.

I’m just his bird. His caged little Emery.

 

I head to the bathroom. 

Memories from what has been the past three years of my life come back to me as the water rolls down my back.

 

When I found out i was his fated mate, I didn’t know what to do. Nikolai was my savior and my provider. He brought me and my sister, the only survivors of a rogue attack, back to his pack, and then we found out we were mates. He admitted it, but he never marked me.

He hasn’t claimed me as his mate even though I'm his.

I’m a disgrace to him. A werewolf without a wolf. 

I’m a stain to his pack and I have nothing to give him except my body. His new Luna, she has everything to give to him.

Nadia is as beautiful as the day is young. 

Her parents are the Alpha and Luna of the Redstone pack. They’re rich, and powerful, and his pack will celebrate him for making her his new Luna. It makes me want to sob and scream. 

I want to pull at my hair and yank the sheets off the bed. 

I want to throw them down the balcony. I want the whole pack to see them… to, to…. to smell them.  To see we were both on them and know that woman will never be his Luna.

But that’s just a lie, because she already is. 

Tears roll down my cheeks as I come out of the bathroom and my heart aches even more. I see the gift box open on our bedside table and in it is a necklace, more expensive than anything I've worn in my life.

Enough to cover all it has taken to look after me for three years.

He’s going to give it to her because she’s worth so much more to him. More than anything I ever will.

I look away from the necklace as my phone rings. My voice comes out thick and gravelly as i pick up the call, “You’re on to Emery Night. How can I help you?”

The voice that responds is a familiar male’s, “Emery? Are you there? This is Doug from the hospital.”

At the mention of the word ‘hospital’ I reach for the dress nearest to me and begin slipping into it with urgency. Doug’s words are filled with haste, “Raven’s condition has gotten worse, Emery. You have to get here right now.”

I fly out of the room the moment I hear that. I stumble all the way to my small car and rush to the hospital. One thought ringing repeatedly in my mind.

Please. Not my sister.

I can’t lose my sister.

~~~~~~

Doug is standing in the hospital parking lot when I get there and tears slide down my cheeks as I run to him. His grim expression makes even more fear fill my heart but he doesn’t give me any explanations. Doug simply pulls me into the hospital and rushes me past the other nurses into Raven’s room.

What I see makes my blood run cold. 

My voice cracks as I ask wild-eyed, “Where is he?”

Ever since the night of the attack, my six year old sister has suffered from a terrible illness. The doctors say it’s a wolf-poison induced organ failure so there’s always been a physician in here with her. He monitors her condition and keeps her stable. They said he was the best… so where is he?

I turn, shaking, to look at Doug and I can't help the sob that leaves my lips as I scream, “Where is he! Isn’t he supposed to be taking care of her?!”

Doug’s eyes are filled with pity and his voice is sullen as he responds, “The Alpha asked for Daniel to be pulled away a while ago. Raven’s situation worsened the moment he left but they said he’s needed at the border. 

He’s doing a ceremonial purge on the new Luna.”

My whole body trembles as I feel my legs weaken beneath me. I need to speak to Nikolai. 

I reach for the closest phone I can find, my breath coming out in heavy spurts and panic making my blood run cold. Each call I send through to Nikolai’s phone bounces and I curse, I beg under my breath.

“Please, pick up.”

“Please pick up, Nikolai.”

Nikolai doesn’t and I lower myself onto a chair, crying hysterically and shuddering from fear as I try and try again. The sudden sound of the tv makes me look up. The broadcast going through every television in the pack right now stares me back in the face.

I watch Nikolai step up onto the stage with his new Luna by his side, a radiant smile on his face. 

He’s never smiled like that when he’s with me.

Sorrow sharp as an arrow, lances through my heart as I watch. I hear the happiness in Nikolai’s voice when he speaks, “Today is one of the best days of my life. 

Today, the Night pack, my pack, finally has a Luna. A woman who I love with all I have in me, and who means more to me and the pack than she will ever realize.”

I catch a glimpse of the physician as the camera turns and still shaking i try Nikolai’s number again, but he’s still speaking, still smiling, and I watch as he casually silences his phone right before he pulls another woman into his arms.

I drop the phone and bury my face in my hands.

I… I can’t do this. 

I’m not strong enough for this.