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Fire
Fire
Author: BurntAsh3s

Prologue

Author: BurntAsh3s
last update Last Updated: 2024-09-18 00:17:23

Regret. It always comes too late, right? In my case, my regret was something I felt immensely guilty about, but I also felt shame. I’ve made so many mistakes over the years. The road I’ve walked hasn’t been an easy one. Some days I wondered if this was it. Was this how I would finally come to meet the gods?

Choices. What would you choose if you were me? How do you choose between two children? The first, Kai, he’s taken over my whole world. I love him more than I love myself. The second, a daughter, one I knew nothing about. I love her though, because she’s a part of me, my child as well. How do you ultimately choose between life and death?

Obligation. It’s the one thing that’s been instilled in me from birth. We all have our obligations to fulfill and as a wolf, you never shirk from your responsibilities. No matter what. As an Alpha, that responsibility was even worse for me. I had to be the example, the leader, the protector, the shoulder everyone leaned on. I had to be everything.

Family. It’s everything to me. I love them completely and I would die for each one of them, even my daughter. My family is what kept me sane and on the righteous path, most of the time. I was at a crossroads between the path I had to follow and the one I wanted to follow.

So, I ask you again. What would you choose if you were me? Not choosing is also a choice and I couldn’t just sit back and wait for whatever to happen. I had to be proactive like I had been with Alexander. Technically, I murdered my brother, but I still believed that if I hadn’t done that, he would have come back with a vengeance.

I’m tired of fighting, I’m tired of arguing, I’m just tired. Physical, mental and spiritual exhaustion filled me to my very core. Death knew that, he used it against me, he used love against me and I let him.

This new path I had to walk now was a path I didn’t choose for myself. Where would I end up? Will I be me in the end? I couldn’t help but think that after everything, I might lose Adara for good. I would be forced to make decisions that would hurt those I loved the most, even when I thought I was protecting them, I was hurting them.

It had nothing to do with being a good Alpha or even being a good husband. Choices and circumstances changed me and I watched myself retreat, make choices and make mistakes. I watched it happen and I let it. If I hadn’t seen what the future held, we all would have died and I couldn’t let that happen.

I hated Death for tricking me. I hated him with everything in me, but in the end my choices were mine. I knew not to trust him and I was plunged into a world filled with blood and vengeance, all by choice.

Who else would die on this new journey we were forced to take now? Death had been silent for weeks now. Death isn’t patient and he takes what he wants. I wondered silently if even Death had forsaken me? I didn’t have to wait long as he visited me sooner than I wanted him to.

Very soon I would have to face my own demons, I’d have to accept everything that I had done but I wasn’t sure if I could leave the past in the past. Would you? If you knew the whole story, would you keep on hating me? I have to accept what I’ll become, what I have to become in order to survive. I sit and listen and I think, but I don’t think I truly listened or thought about the consequences of my decisions.

I felt helpless, weak, incapable of doing what had to be done. It was a difficult choice to make, but one I made nonetheless, regardless of the consequences. I pray to my gods and hope you will forgive me. I pray that I survive, although I had a feeling that someone else would finish writing my story. I pray mostly that I’m wrong and that when I finally open my eyes, you’ll still be there waiting for me.

As hard as it is, I don’t have many regrets. Loving you and having you in my life will always be one of the best things I ever did. I won’t ever regret opening that front door and imprinting. I won’t ever regret having my children. I won’t ever regret doing what I did because despite what Death thinks, love does conquer all. Love will always be more important. It has to be.

I’m sorry for hurting you, for lying to you, for not being enough. I’m sorry for the pain you had to endure because of me. I’m sorry for letting him die and his death will haunt me for the rest of my life. His death is what ultimately broke something inside of me that could never heal.

I’ve always strived to be better, to do better, but in doing that I also became something else. It was a choice I’d make again, in a heartbeat. I have no regrets about that, I can’t regret it because the choice was easy, me or them. I chose them. I will always choose them.

As I sit here writing this, I say thank you. Thank you for loving me, for enduring me and lastly for surviving me. The realization that I was my own worst enemy would only dawn on me when it was almost too late. I’m sorry will never be enough but know that I am so terribly sorry.

I love you. I haven’t said it enough but I pray that you feel it, that you know it, that you believe in it. I hope it’s enough to carry you through the dark times. It’s the only thing I cling to, your love.

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  • Fire   Part One

    “Kai…” I managed out a whisper. Death touched my soul and I blinked.Three women sat beside a well. I didn’t recognize this place, but it was breathtakingly beautiful. The women had no faces, yet I felt like I knew them. I had to prove myself for them to reveal their faces to me.“These are the Norns, they can either bless you or curse you. To change Kai’s fate, you have to honor each of them and perhaps they will reveal to you what you seek most.” Death’s voice was low.“Where are we?” I asked him, looking around.“We’re beneath Yggdrasil in Asgard. You have a choice to make, give them what they ask, and they will reveal the past, the present and the future to you. Refuse them and be cursed.”I walked up to the three women and I bowed before them. In this place, I had no standing, Alpha or not, and to offend them would have consequences. Urdr, Verdandi and Skuld each placed a hand on my head, and I was taken back to the past. I saw Karani, I could feel her, hear her and the pain tore

    Last Updated : 2024-09-18
  • Fire   Part Two

    “Death visited me earlier. He took me to a place where I saw three old women, they’re known as the Norns. They see the past, the present and the future. If you’re worthy, they will show you and give you a chance to change your fate.”“Who’s fate? Yours?”“I have a daughter.” Her eyes were wide with anger, but she controlled her voice.“How old?” I knew this was the make-or-break moment.“She was born the day after Kai.”Adara slapped me harder than I thought she could and stood up. She grabbed the first thing she could find on my desk and threw it at my head. The solid steel wolf statuette connected and cut my cheek open. She wasn’t looking at me, she was crying as she grabbed whatever she could find, and I had to turn my back to her.“Adara! Enough!” I yelled at her as she slumped to the floor and sobbed. I bent down in front of her and just held her.“Let me just tell the story. This is as big a shock to me as it is to you. I never cheated.” She didn’t lift her head and I continued

    Last Updated : 2024-09-18
  • Fire   Part Three

    I emptied half a bottle of Scotch in the time it took James to arrive at the house. I was exhausted and I was scared. I wouldn’t admit that to anyone, but I was. I had no idea what awaited me because I hadn’t even known witches existed.James and I finished the bottle as I told him my story. His eyes held disbelief and the expression on his face was one of utter shock. I left nothing out, I told him everything. He didn’t interrupt me once and for that I was glad. It was hard enough to tell the story twice in one day.I hadn’t slept yet and I knew my eyes were red-rimmed from lack of sleep. I had spent the night looking at Christian and Kai as they slept in our bed next to Adara. Christian saw it as having a sleepover and he loved it.“I don’t know what to say. Witches…shit”“Tell me about it.” I rubbed a hand over my face and sighed.“And Jessica and Malachi? I didn’t see that one coming.” I smiled at the way he said it, the slight frown making it more comical than it was. “What are y

    Last Updated : 2024-09-18
  • Fire   Part Four

    I gave the pack a moment to settle down, to digest everything I’d told them and let them come to terms with what they’d seen from Jessica. It was a lot to take in and a lot to understand. Once I did that spell, there was no going back, I’d be a half breed.“Dezrael will be coming for Kai because he is my first-born.” I had yet to tell them that I was a half breed.“Why is she coming after Kai?” Frank asked.“Okay, guys, now I’m going to tell you another secret that I only recently found out and then if it’s your choice, I’ll step down as Alpha if that’s what you want.” They all looked at me and I could see the confusion in their eyes.“This sounds worse than a witch coming after your son.”“Karani was a half witch and that makes me a half witch too. She chose her wolf life over that of a witch. Dezrael’s fear is that Kai will draw on Karani’s power one day. She wants Karani’s power for herself and she will try to claim it through my daughter which she thinks is my first-born.”There w

    Last Updated : 2024-09-18
  • Fire   Part Five

    Malachi glanced at Jessica every so often as he drove towards her house. It had been a long day and the time was creeping closer to midnight. She’d been quiet ever since they left the house and he wished she’d say something.“Jess.”Jessica knew exactly what he wanted to say. Malachi was loyal to a fault, always pushing and putting everyone else first. “No, I’m not going to do it.”“Why not?” The tension in the car was thick and Malachi exhaled slowly as he felt the familiar rise of irritation that could and would turn to anger in the blink of an eye.“You have no idea what you’re doing, he has no idea. That spell I mentioned, I’ve never done it and I don’t know of any witch that has successfully completed the spell.”Malachi remained quiet as he pulled into the garage and Jessica climbed out of the car and pulled the side door open. Malachi gritted his teeth when he noticed that she had yet again failed to lock her doors.“Jess…don’t walk away from me.” Malachi put his keys down on t

    Last Updated : 2024-09-18
  • Fire   Part Six

    Malachi halted in the doorway as Jessica lay motionless on the bed, the cups falling from his hands as his breath hitched in his throat. She wasn’t breathing and she had no beating heart. Malachi swore under his breath as he looked at her, wanting to touch her but not being able to.It reminded him too much of Karani’s lifeless body and it physically hurt, deep in his soul because he had no idea what to do. He hated feeling powerless and clueless and it didn’t happen often that he did.Malachi could feel his emotions tumbling about, his heart rate slowing, his skin growing cold as fear gripped him. He couldn’t lose her, not like this, not for something he asked her to do, something she hadn’t wanted to do.Malachi stood rooted to the spot, a low buzzing sound in his ears. Jessica was his second chance at life. He’d realized it soon after that first night he’d spent at her house, even with no imprinting bond keeping him to her, he loved her completely.Jessica gasped and her eyes snapp

    Last Updated : 2024-10-18
  • Fire   Part Seven

    James had begrudgingly taken over for me both with the pack and at the hotel. We still had a manager that reported to him while James took over command. It freed up my time to do what I had to do to keep Kai safe.I spent my days in the den going through every single lupiary that we possessed, but not one of them mentioned witches. I wanted to know everything I could. Knowledge was power but my knowledge at that stage was extremely limited and that’s when I phoned Jessica to join me.“What?” I smiled at the way Jessica answered her phone. Diplomacy was obviously not her forte.“I need help.”“Of course you do, Superstar. Where are you?”“At the den. Our lupiaries have nothing about witches.”“Duh. Give me ten.” She ended the call as abruptly as she had answered it and I sat back on the sofa.Jessica arrived exactly ten minutes later, a frown on her forehead and not looking happy at all. She fell down on the sofa and emptied my glass of Scotch before looking at me.“Help with what exac

    Last Updated : 2024-10-18
  • Fire   Part Eight

    It only took me a few seconds as it all clicked and I smiled broadly and kissed her forehead again. I tucked my phone into my pocket and headed to the garage. I found a shovel and made my way around the house and down to the clearing.The path down to the clearing was as overgrown as always and the stillness of the forest around me had me feeling at peace. I knew that feeling wouldn’t last long. The moment I stepped into the clearing I’d feel different.I entered the clearing and my soul felt heavy. Too many dead bodies had lain here. I walked up to my tree and I looked at it. My mark didn’t look anything like a wolf to me but then I wondered if perhaps Karani had made Adara see a wolf, perhaps knowing that this moment would come.It seemed Karani had been prepared for a lot of things and I missed hearing her voice. It felt like years since I’d hugged her and I missed her warmth. I didn’t think I’d ever get over her loss and I didn’t really want to.I wondered where I should start dig

    Last Updated : 2024-10-18

Latest chapter

  • Fire   Epilogue

    I sat down behind the desk and moved the mouse. The laptop came to life and I looked at it. I read the letter that I had written to Adara ten months earlier. Wow, I really did love her. I looked down and a huge wooden chest stood behind the desk. I wondered what was inside. I opened a drawer and there were cables and stationery, normal stuff you would find in a drawer.I tried the next one and it was locked. I looked at it and then felt beneath the desk where I sat, a few inches forward and took the key down from the magnet that was fastened there. How did I know that? I just knew there would be a key for this drawer. I unlocked it and pulled it open.It was full of A5 diaries, in numerical order, starting from 1994. I opened the first one and it was filled with my handwriting. I began to read it. It began when I was fifteen years old and it described my first teenage relationship. I skipped forward and read the last few pages. It was filled with wolf laws, training with Malachi, stor

  • Fire   Part One Hundred and Fifty-Eight

    Malachi and I finished our coffee and sat staring at each other. It felt oddly comfortable to be sitting there with him. I could tell that he loved me fiercely because his eyes and his aura, that I could see, were soft.“Let’s take a walk,” Malachi said.I went upstairs and got dressed in my own jeans, boots, and a t-shirt. I grabbed a sweater that Adara had given me the night before and pulled it over my head. I went back downstairs and Malachi stood in front of the open sliding doors.I followed him outside and across the garden right into the forest. I looked around me, this was beautiful. We walked in silence until Malachi stopped in a clearing, it felt kind of magical and I felt silly for thinking that.“This is sacred ground to us. Ten months ago you fought against twelve witches right here,” Malachi walked over to another spot and knelt down on one knee. “Right here, this is where you disappeared right in front of our eyes. Your cloak transported you somewhere and we had no ide

  • Fire   Part One Hundred and Fifty-Seven

    Adara walked back down the hallway and into the living room. There were pictures all over the walls and I stood in front of it and looked at them. I was in many of the photos and it was hard to look at them and not know when they were taken. I smiled a lot and I guessed I was happy with my previous life.“Cute kids,” I said as I looked at a canvas array of two babies.“They’re also yours,” Adara said to me and I looked at her in shock.“I have kids?” I asked her, stunned. She smiled as she walked forward.“This one is Kai, you chose his name, and this one here is Saga,” she said and I could see that she loved them very much.“How old are they?” I asked her.“One and a half, they could only crawl the last time you saw them,” she said and I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t remember them.“I think I should show you to a room and then tomorrow when Malachi comes back we can talk, I’m sure you have a hundred questions,” she said and I smiled at her. I followed her upstairs, my wife, mothe

  • Fire   Part One Hundred and Fifty-Six

    The jet landed and I opened my eyes. I felt better although I could still sleep. Everything felt like an awkward dream where you didn’t know you were dreaming. I kicked Josh’s leg and he woke up.“What’s up man, did we crash?” he asked and I laughed at him.“I think we’re in Seward,” I said to him as I looked out of the window.Malachi, Jessica and James had walked down the stairs and two cars stood waiting at the bottom of the stairs. Malachi’s Zeta, Quentin, was loading our duffel bags into the first SUV.“These guys travel in style,” Josh said and grinned at me. We walked off the jet and got into one of the SUV’s Malachi showed us. We were driving with James. Malachi and Jessica followed behind us.“So this is Seward, where I live?” I asked James and he nodded.“All our lives we’ve lived here, went to Seward High, graduated, then we went to college,” James said and Josh laughed.“Should have known your ass was educated,” he said as he looked out of the window. Malachi’s car overtoo

  • Fire   Part One Hundred and Fifty-Five

    I looked intently at Josh. Everything he said was true and a sudden idea occurred to me. I wasn’t going anywhere with these people alone.“Come with me then, help me figure this out. You have no pack, but you have me and I have a pack, a family, a home. I would never just leave you,” I said to him and he nodded at me.“Fine, let’s go ice-skating or shit,” he said and smiled at me.“I’ll go with you on one condition,” I said to Malachi.“Yes?” Malachi didn’t seem worried about my condition, he only wanted me to leave with them.“Josh goes with me, I’m not leaving him behind,” I said to Malachi and he nodded.“Of course. Gather whatever you want to take. Our flight back leaves in three hours,” he said.He walked towards the door holding Jessica’s hand. James turned to look at me and I could tell that he was sad. I could feel it deep within myself.“Do you feel that?” he asked me and I looked at him.“I feel your sadness,” I answered him.“That’s one of the things you can do. You can fee

  • Fire   Part One Hundred and Fifty-Four

    “We don’t care what you selling, bargaining or want. We ain’t interested,” Josh said as he closed the door behind me and stood next to me. I had an uneasy feeling about this and I was glad that I wasn’t alone.The older man looked at me with curiosity and I wondered what he wanted from me. His gray eyes seemed to search for something in mine and I couldn’t look away. It was almost like he was trying to read my mind.“He doesn’t recognize us,” the older man said to the younger man and woman with him.“Am I supposed to know who you are?” I asked the older man.The younger man stepped forward. His eyes held sadness and he looked intently into mine. He put both of his hands on my shoulders and squeezed lightly. It all felt too surreal like I was supposed to know him.“My name’s James,” he said and then he hugged me tightly. I just stood there with my arms by my sides not knowing what to do. He let go of me after a while, sighed deeply and then looked away.“I think you might have me confu

  • Fire   Part One Hundred and Fifty-Three

    It felt like I got tunnel vision until I could only see him, moving in the ring. I was focused and I saw the plan forming in his mind. He was going to move me until he had me on the ropes and then deliver his killer punch. I saw it happen in slow motion.“He’s going to come from the right and then the left, the punch to your jaw will be a right hook,” the voice said clearly in my head and I dropped my hands as I stood up right in shock. I couldn’t move my head as George’s fist hit me so hard I felt my jaw dislocate.I was on my back, coughing up blood and the crowd was going wild. Josh was right there by my head. “What the hell happened, why’d you drop your arms man?” He was yelling at me and the announcer bent over me.“Ten count then the fight continues, unless you tap out.” I shook my head and started to get up.I pushed my jawbone back into place and I felt it start to heal. I looked up at the Council members sitting there and somehow I knew that the older man was speaking to me i

  • Fire   Part One Hundred and Fifty-Two

    I stood in that back room and wondered about the Council member’s presence. Everything that Josh had told me about them was terrible. They were rich old men using the system to their advantage, getting rid of packs that irritated them and executing people as they saw fit.He wanted nothing to do with them and neither did I. I had enough things on my plate to worry about their presence. Josh and I weren’t interested in becoming Council Zetas, no matter what they offered us.I shook my head and I took my shirt and shoes off. I had to get my head in the game. Tonight’s fight would probably be the hardest one by the look of my opponent. He was ready for me. I closed my eyes and centered my energy.I saw the fight play off in my head, in slow motion, punch for punch, kick for kick. This guy was a street brawler, I decided. His punches would hurt and he could get a knockout on the jawline.He wasn’t fast but he was strong and usually won his fight after a few punches, where he would then sn

  • Fire   Part One Hundred and Fifty-One

    Malachi walked down the hall, hoping that John wasn’t sending him another tribunal email. He was tired and he wanted to spend time at home. The kids were changing so much and every time he came back from a trip it felt like he’d missed something new they were doing.Adara was doing her best and she really was a terrific mother. Those two kids wanted for nothing. She read bedtime stories to them, told them stories about Kiran, they were healthy and well looked after.He could hear them all laughing in the sitting room as he closed the door to his study and switched the laptop on. He waited for it to switch on and then accessed his Council encrypted email and typed in his password.The email was from John with a video attached.“Malachi,I hope you’re sitting down while reading this. I received this video from a California Alpha, he always sends me these when new talent steps onto the scene for consideration as Council Zetas.Good luck,John”.Malachi frowned at first. They didn’t need

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