Chapter Seven

Owen

Violet starts to settle down, but my heart is in my throat. Charlie is only a few yards from me, standing on the sidewalk, staring at me like she’s seeing a ghost. In a way, maybe that’s all I am to her.

A distant memory that’s started to fade. I can only hope it’s haunted her a few times over the years.

Because she’s haunted me.

“O-Owen,” she starts, pulling her earbuds out of her ears. It should be illegal for anyone to be this good-looking. Her blonde hair is pulled up in a high ponytail and sweat drips down her chest, disappearing between her breasts. She’s wearing a pink sports bra and tight running shorts. Her body is toned and tan, and I remember all too well the way it felt under mine. “You…you have a baby?” Her eyes go to Jackson. “Or two?”

I wave Jackson back over and laugh. “No, they’re not mine. You remember my brother Wes?”

She blinks rapidly as she nods. “Oh right, Dean said he had kids.” Her eyes go to Violet. “She’s adorable.”

I give her a wink. “Now that she does get from me.” I swallow my pounding heart and do my best not to fuck Charlie with my eyes. Because she somehow looks better than I remember. There’s always a risk for seeing something in real life after fantasizing about it, and she does not disappoint.

She stares at me as I stare at her, as if neither of us knows what to say. Because, really, what the hell do I say? I’m sorry I broke your heart years ago. I hope you’re happy and got everything you deserve in life…but at the same time, I really hope you’re single because if I can’t have you, no one else should…which is a dick thing to wish since that means you broke off your engagement?

Doesn’t really roll off the tongue.

“You look good,” I tell her, not caring that she knows I’m checking her out.

Her cheeks, which are already flushed from running in this heat, redden even more. “I’m all sweaty,” she says, trying to brush off the compliment.

“That adds to your appeal.” I flash her a grin.

“Don’t,” she says softly.

“Don’t what? Compliment you?”

She quickly shakes her head, swinging her blonde ponytail to the side. It sticks to her neck, and she reaches up to pull it off.

“I seem to remember you liked being complimented.”

She blows out a breath and hikes up one eyebrow. “Not as much as you did.”

“Touché,” I laugh. “And everyone likes to be complimented. Anyone who says otherwise is lying.”

“Well, of course people do. It’s human nature.” She purses her lips and shifts her gaze to Jackson, who’s riding his bike at full speed down the sidewalk, and I’m not entirely sure he’ll be able to stop before he hits Charlie.

She sidesteps at the last second, moving right up against me. “Oh, shoot,” she says, jumping back and Violet starts to fuss. “I didn’t mean to wake her up.”

“It’s okay. She needs to wake up anyway. This little stinker sleeps all day and is up all night,” I tell her, gently rocking Vi in my arms. Charlie’s jaw tenses as she watches me for a few seconds. Then she looks away and laughs.

“What’s so funny?” I ask her.

She waves her hand in the air. “It’s just…just…never mind.”

“Hi,” Jackson says, turning his bike around. “I’m Jackson.”

“What happened to not talking to strangers?” I ask him, narrowing my eyes.

“You’re talking to her,” Jackson quips.

“She could be some sort of psycho for all we know,” I tell him with a wink.

Charlie laughs. “I might be a little crazy. And I’m Charlie. Nice to meet you.”

“Charlie’s a boy name,” Jackson says, wrinkling his nose and making both Charlie and me laugh.

“My full name is Charlotte, but I’ve gone by Charlie since, well, since I can remember.” Jackson just nods and pedals forward. “He looks just like Wes.”

“Yeah, it’s crazy how much he looks like him now that he’s getting older.”

“So, you’re babysitting?” Charlie plays with her wireless headphones, twisting them around her fingers.

“I am. Scarlet—Wes’s wife and Violet’s mother—is pretty exhausted. She’s napping.”

“That’s…that’s really nice of you.”

“You sound surprised.” I watch Jackson ride his bike to the corner and turn around. He’s allowed to go up and down the street as long as I’m out here watching him. We have plans later to put Vi in her stroller and go to the park a few blocks down from the house.

“It’s just…just…I’m not.”

Fuck, I shouldn’t love it when she gets flustered like this. It doesn’t happen very often, making me think seeing me again is doing bad things to her just like it is to me.

Or at least I hope.

Because I’ve spent the last few years telling myself I’m fine, that living it up and being single is what I want out of life. That I’m over her.

And seeing her now…fuck.

“You look good,” she says and then almost looks surprised by her confession.

“I work out.” I give her a wink and she laughs, shaking her head.

“And you haven’t changed much.”

My cocky smile disappears from my face. I have changed. I’ve grown up a lot, though to be fair, I still have some growing up left to do.

But I’m not the same man who told her I wasn’t ready to settle down. And I’ve grown enough since then to realize how much of a mistake I made.

“Why change what’s perfect?” I raise my eyebrows and she rolls her eyes, trying hard not to laugh. “What about you? Has the big city changed you?”

And now it’s her turn to be somber. “Yes. It has.”

“In a good way?”

She looks out at the street, watching a car roll through the stop sign. “I’m not sure yet.”

“I heard you’re getting married.” I don’t mean to blurt it out, but dammit, I need to know. I swallow hard and push my heart back down into my chest. I watch her face, looking for the words she won’t say out loud.

But she gives nothing away, sign of a good lawyer, I suppose.

“Not anymore.”

“Sorry.”

“Thanks.” She shrugs and turns her head down. A sharp ache hits me square in the chest. As much as I want Charlie to be mine and only mine, seeing her dejected like this is killing me. I’d rather have all the heartache, all the pain and regret in the world, than have her feel even the slightest bit of it.

“We’re going for a walk,” I start. “You could join if you want. Unless you need to finish your run. Then, by all means, go ahead so I can watch you leave.”

She shakes her head again. “I’m walking that way anyway,” she confesses. “I can walk with you. It’s only two blocks down and I need to get my heart rate back down.”

“Then maybe being close to me is a bad idea.”

“You are just as I remember.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

I take a few steps back, looking back at Jackson to make sure he’s slowing before he gets to the other street corner. Once he turns his bike around, I hurry up the porch steps to get Violet’s stroller, grabbing it with one hand.

“It’s not good or bad,” Charlie answers, staying in the same spot. I get Violet situated, pull the visor up to keep her shaded, and then double-check the diaper bag, making sure I have extra diapers, wipes, and her bottle.

“You really got this uncle thing down,” Charlie comments as we start down the street.

“I’m the favorite. Don’t tell Logan, Dean, or Archer.”

Charlie smiles and we silently go down the block, walking fast to keep up with Jackson.

“I haven’t been here in years,” Charlie muses to herself when we roll up to the park. Jackson ditches his bike and sprints ahead, seeing some of his friends from school. I keep walking, finding a spot in the shade to sit and give Violet her bottle.

Charlie watches us for a moment before sitting next to me. She smiles at Violet, baby-talking a hello to try and get her to smile.

“How old is she?”

“Two and a half months,” I answer without having to think. “Quinn and Archer’s little one is only a few weeks older.”

“Aww, that’ll be nice to have a cousin close in age.”

I nod. “Quinn and Scarlet have become really close too. They’re both obsessed with their damn cats,” I laugh.

“What’s wrong with cats?” Charlie hikes up both eyebrows.

“Not you too. At least Logan and Danielle have a dog in addition to their cats.”

“I have a feeling I’m missing something.”

“It’s a bit of a running joke between us that started with Quinn being a crazy cat lady, who then turned Scarlet into one.”

“And Scarlet is Weston’s new wife?”

“Yeah.”

“I still can’t get over finding out Quinn and Archer got married. I never would have seen that coming. Well, aside from her having a massive crush on him when she was a teenager.”

“She didn’t have a crush on Archer.”

Charlie lets out a snort of laughter. “Oh, she did big time. How did you not see it?”

I make a face and readjust Violet in my arms, sitting her up a bit so she can have her bottle. “He was so much older than her.”

“He still is older than her.”

“Yeah, but it’s different now.”

Charlie laughs and shakes her head. “All four of you were purposely oblivious to Quinn’s love life back then, you know. But pretending it didn’t exist didn’t mean it wouldn’t happen.”

I laugh too. “I still like to pretend it doesn’t exist. Because Archer’s like a brother and she’s my sister and it’s a little weird.”

“I think it’s sweet. Oh, and I read an article a few years ago online about Quinn selling that app she developed. That’s unbelievable.”

“She’s always been smart.”

“She has. The last time I saw her, she was coming back for a long weekend from MIT.” It’s weird having Charlie here like this. She’s been gone for so long, yet she fits in like she just left yesterday.

Jackson runs back over, taking his bike helmet off and dropping it on the ground before taking off again. I grab a burp cloth and the bottle and start feeding Violet. She gets through not even half before she starts to fall asleep.

“It’s really nice that you’re babysitting,” Charlie says again, smiling as she looks at the sleeping baby in my arms.

“I like it,” I tell her honestly. “Mostly because I get to give the kids back at the end of the day.”

Charlie laughs. “That is a perk. You were always good with kids, though. Probably because you’re just a big kid yourself.”

As much as I like sitting here talking and joking like nothing has changed, it’s starting to mess with my head. Because I know what I’ll be thinking about for the rest of the day.

And the night.

And tomorrow.

But worse, I know how I’ll be feeling. It’s all sunshine and fucking rainbows right now, but once the lights go out and it’s just my thoughts in the dark, the regret will start to creep up on me. It always starts in the pit of my stomach, forming a hard knot that I have to drown in whiskey or tequila.

Yet that fucker is able to float and will rise to the surface and remind me of everything I did wrong in our relationship. How what I thought I wanted then turned out to be the very thing I feared most in life.

Being alone, forced to watch the only woman I’ll ever love move on with her life…and away from me.