"Juls, how did Thanksgiving go?" Mark asks from the couch, and my cheeks start to flush. It's Tuesday night, and I'm preparing dinner before heading to work. Everyone's back from vacation, exams are looming, and I'm eager to wrap up the term. "It went well," I reply, my lips pressed together, as I slice a tomato for a quick salad, reminiscing about the good times from the past. "Oh my god, look at that face!" Kyle teases. "What's going on?" "Nothing," I shrug. In reality, a lot is going on. Kent is eager to expedite our transition to dating. He's been working with a tech guy he found earlier today, explaining his plan and how it should work. If everything goes according to plan, we should be good to go once exams are over. This morning, Doctor Elliot, my backup interviewer, didn't seem too thrilled about meeting me at first. But after we talked for an extra hour due to his interest in my research, my perspective shifted. He kept apologizing for the scheduling hiccup, but in a way,
We were really into each other and had grown so much in the last few days, but now we had to take a step back. And it was killing me. The drive to the pool is short, much shorter than it used to feel. Once we get there, I don't want to leave. "Honey, I'll see you in a few hours," he whispers to me as he parks the car, and I nod, unbuckling my seatbelt. "Go save some lives." "Thanks for bringing me," I reply in a hushed tone, and he nods. We sit in silence for a moment, both wanting the same thing: a kiss, a hug, something to express how much we care. "Go have a great workout." "I'm trying to stay in shape for our date in a few weeks," he teases, and I laugh, rolling my eyes. "I know you have high expectations for yourself." "At the top," I playfully retort, and he chuckles. "Goodbye, see you later." I smile, placing my hand on his arm. He nods and lets me exit the car to walk into the pool. I sigh and try not to dwell on my favorite moments with him for too long. I can't afford to
These past weeks have been tough. Waiting feels like running a marathon, and each day is becoming more difficult. Since Thanksgiving, things have been chaotic. I wanted to spend every day with him, and every night before I slept, I thought about how close he was. I was falling hard, and it was becoming harder to stay away. Exams were good for my mental health; they gave me something else to focus on. It's not great to be so in love with your roommate that it hurts. Before we understood our feelings, he drove me to work a lot, which wasn't unusual, but now he did it more frequently. We got along so well that our friends found it strange. I didn't know what to do because I didn't hate him anymore, but it was easier to hate him. Abby came over to study last night, and I had to lie to her too. Kent walked into the kitchen to get something to eat before his workout while we were at the table. Then he asked Juls, "Do you want anything?" I smiled at him, and his eyes softened, a kind smi
"Juls?" Kent's voice resonates through the apartment. "Juls?!" Five seconds later, he's in my doorway, his chest heaving, backpack on, and shoes and coat still on. "Are you okay? What's wrong? I heard you scream." He farts, and I cover my mouth and smile. "I got in," I say softly. "I'm in, I got a spot in the Northwestern program." I'm so thrilled that tears well up in my eyes. "You got in?" He asks, a big smile on his face, and I nod excitedly. He rushes over and gives me a tight hug. My tears flow even faster. We've been apart for over a week, so it's a relief to see him. "Of course you did; I knew you would." He talks over my shoulder. "I'm really happy for you." "Thanks," I whisper, and he squeezes me until I can hardly breathe. "What are you doing back when you said you'd be at the library late?" I step back, and he chuckles. "Baby, good news comes in pairs," he grins. "The video Piper made is gone. The guy I worked with told me it was only on her phone. No more embarrassing v
We'd been so troubled about it for two weeks, so it's no surprise it ended quickly. He grins after we finish, pulling a blanket over us. His hand cups the side of my face, and his thumb strokes my cheek. "Okay?" I nod in response to his question. "Yeah," I murmur as I wrap my arms around him. "Better than I've been in two weeks," I affirm, and he smiles. "Me too," he sighs, and I snuggle closer to him. No matter how close we get, it never feels close enough. I'll always want to be near him, even though I've tried so hard for a long time to stop caring about him because it was so difficult. But if we could have figured something out back then, maybe things wouldn't be so challenging now. I feel bad that Carlo made him doubt his worth. I wish Kent had done more than just listen. I'm sad that our roommates would probably be shocked at the thought of us, and I'm even sadder that I told my friends I liked him when I didn't. I'm sad that he doesn't think highly of himself. "What's going
Juls Dear god, I feel guilty. I feel like I'm always lying to people. I feel bad when I look at my roommates and don't say anything about Kent and me. I don't like how sneaky this is, and I think it's a lot too dangerous. Since Kent burst into my room and told me the good news, things have been crazy. We can always run across the hall to each other quickly when we're alone. It's too easy to get into bed and not want to get out again. It's easy to lie about what time work starts so that Kent and I can spend an hour talking and hanging out in Kent's Jeep outside the pool. It shouldn't be this hard, and I shouldn't be so stressed out about it. But every time I see him, I get this feeling that takes over my whole body. I feel attraction and energy moving through the air, and then I always think about how exciting this is. I'm so lucky that he cares about me so much. Even though it's selfish, I'm not ready to tell anyone else about this. I'm not ready for the crazy drama that's about to
He was so comforting that my eyes began to droop, and I fell asleep with Kent's reassuring presence behind me. Although I didn't perform at my best on that test, I was fairly confident that I could at least manage a B. My dreams, however, were filled with the night I had spent with Kent. It had been a while since we'd shared a bed, so instead of dwelling on crucial details, I found myself thinking about how much I enjoyed sleeping beside him. When I emerged from the auditorium, I felt exhausted but mostly relieved that the ordeal was over. All I wanted was to rush back to my room and take the longest nap imaginable. What I didn't anticipate was seeing Kent waiting outside, leaning against the wall. I blinked and raised an eyebrow. For a moment, I wondered if it was a product of sleep deprivation, but his smirk assured me it was real. He looked particularly good today, his hair tousled atop his head, and his dimples on display. I smiled, causing my eyebrows to raise, and he chuckled
"When we got back, we told them when exams would be over. We had too much going on, and I wanted to focus on my studies. But we agreed to inform both of you tonight, just that... I'm really exhausted, and my mind feels like mush. This was supposed to be a private matter, and we didn't want you to find out this way, but we did want you to be the first to know." I take a deep breath and move slowly across the floor to Kent, who looks vulnerable and open. I quietly slip my hand into his, ignoring the disapproving glances. "I want you to understand something," I insist, tightening my grip on his hand. "I can make my own decisions about this, and Kent's part in it is just as significant as mine. Please don't portray it otherwise." I nod, trying to gauge their reactions, but they both still appear pretty firm in their stances. "I get that this is difficult and will take time. But don't direct your anger toward Kent because we both made this choice." "And don't take it out on Juls either,
After 2 years... Kent "Today has to be perfect." I've been super busy preparing for this day for the last few weeks. It has to happen tonight, or she'll suspect something's up. Juls is getting her master's degree today, and I've never been prouder. She's incredibly smart, always reading or researching. That pile of library books in our office never seems to shrink. She's applied to Ph.D. programs all over, but I think she'll stay at Brown. I'm okay with that because I don't want anything to change about our lives. Well, except for one thing that I hope to change today. I finished my MBA a few months ago and started working full-time downtown. I'm in marketing for now but aiming for investment banking and trust. I know my path, and with time and connections, I hope to take care of us. Juls keeps saying she'll stay in school because she doesn't know what else to do, but I think it's the other way around. School and academia bring out her best. Her eyes light up when she learns some
"We're almost there," Kent insists, turning on his car's signal. I feel like we're in the middle of nowhere, and we've been driving for over an hour. Kent refused to tell me our destination because, as he put it, "I would just g****e where we're going, and then it wouldn't be a surprise anymore!" The weather was gradually getting less cold, not warm yet but no longer snowing or freezing. I was on my last spring break, trying to finish my thesis and schoolwork. We recently received information about our upcoming graduation. In about a month and a half, we would be finishing our undergrad degrees. It was still surreal to me, moving from starting a university degree to finishing it. Kent had been discussing plans for the summer, including hiking trips, which I pretended not to dread. I wasn't much of a hiker, but I was willing to do it with him. We signed our lease for next year, securing that cute little apartment on the other side of campus. The thought of moving in with him excite
"I got my email." Even though Doctor Binkley said I have a spot, I'm still nervous to open it. Maybe I should've waited to open it when I'm alone, but I can't wait. I'm opening it on my way out of lecture. I open the email, quickly reading the first few lines. But at the top, there's a big box that says 'congratulations' and 'welcome!' My heart immediately slows down, and I feel relieved, clutching my phone to my chest. It's official; I'm staying at Brown next year. That means I'll be with my family, my school, and, of course, Kent. We can start our life together, still have our friends and continue studying, but we'll be together. I remember how tough that month at Northwestern was, how much I missed him, and how I felt like I had no support. I need to text my parents and tell them the news. They've been anxiously waiting to hear what I'd do about my living situation next year. But I'll do it later. Right now, I just want to go home and be with someone I love. I pull out my phone
"I hate school sometimes." Yes, I like researching and finding answers to questions no one's ever thought of before, and I like my degree, but the coursework sucks. I'm sick of reading pages and pages of scholarly articles and books and writing a new paper every other week. My honors project is draining every ounce of energy from me, and I was starting to worry if it was even worth it anymore. I hadn't heard about Brown's Master's program yet, and that's the whole reason for this extra burden. Today was Tuesday, one of my busier days. I only had class today until noon, and then I usually spent the rest of the day grinding out work. Today I had to meet with Doctor Binkley and discuss my work. It was something we did monthly to make sure I felt like I was always on the right track. Kent had a break after his class at one-thirty, and we were planning to meet up and study together until his next class at four. Then I was planning to go home and take it easy. I take the elevator up to
I wake up in the middle of a large bed with Kent beside me. We were completely tangled in bedsheets, just beside each other in a beautiful room. I sigh, feeling my body ache and my head pound, but it's bearable. I shuffle over slightly, laying my head on his chest and snuggling back into his side. That seems to get his attention. He moves under me and groans slightly, eyelids fluttering. I feel his lips press a simple kiss to my temple, and I smile. "Hey, Juls," he mumbles. "Hi," I whisper back, watching his eyes open slowly. He grins at me easily, running a hand through my hair. "How do you feel?" he asks, and I shrug. "I have a headache and I'm tired, but I'm okay," I sigh, tracing my fingertips down the center of his chest. "I had a lot of fun last night." "Good," he whispers, putting his hand over mine on his chest. "I know how hard you've been working and all the crap we've been dealing with." His voice is thick with sleep, deep and raspy. "It was nice to have a day that wa
"It's been an amazing night and an unbelievable birthday. I'm pleasantly tipsy, happy, aware, and buzzing," I express. It looks like all three of our friends have scored phone numbers tonight, giving Kent and me some alone time. I notice the place clearing out, and I realize it's probably time to head home. The bar is closing in about thirty minutes, and it's close to three in the morning. "Want to go somewhere else?" Abby asks as we wait for our jackets. I sigh and shake my head. I'm ready to devour some greasy food, drink water, and snuggle into bed with Kent. We've teased about getting intimate, but with all our roommates around, it's not a possibility. I've let go of that idea and just want a relaxed and easy night. "I'm good," I sigh, and she nods with a simple shrug. "Thanks a lot for everything; this night was so, so fun!" "I'm thrilled you enjoyed it!" She insists, giving me a hug, and I grin. Kent retrieves our coats, and I sigh, not looking forward to facing the cold a
It was nice to feel noticed by him, nice to know that he always seemed to care about what I was up to. I'd never felt attractive before I started dating Kent. We all round up the last of our coats and shoes while the Uber's on its way. I get my coat on, and I feel Kent slide his hand along the small of my back. I gasp a bit quietly and look up, seeing his cocky grin. "You look nice," he whispers, and I chuckle, feeling his fingertips slide around the edge of my waistband. Soon we're all piling into an Uber, and I hear Abby chatting up the driver in the front seat. I'll always be envious of her confidence and how she talks to people like she's known them forever. We grab a quick dinner at a pizza place around the corner. Everyone pushed that we should go somewhere nicer, but I didn't want to. I just wanted to go out and have fun with my friends. I hadn't gone out in a long time, not really since before Christmas, and I'd spent way too much time feeling lonely, buried in work and ove
"Did you want to stay longer?" Kent asks as we step into his car, and I smile, closing the door and putting my seatbelt on. "No, we've been there for hours," I mumble, safely tucking my birthday card into my coat's inner pocket. "If we stay longer, we're staying for dinner." Time with my family was amazing, it meant the world to me, and I was thankful I had it so close to my birthday. "Your parents are really cool," he admits, turning on the car and shifting it into drive. "No, they really aren't," I snort. "Did you miss the part where mom pulled out my baby album and sang my favorite lullaby? To all of us?" I ask, and he chuckles. "Or my dad talking about his Master's thesis? His theoretical chemistry Master's thesis?" "You know what I mean," he defends. "They're...people. Like real, normal, kind people who care about everyone." "I guess they have that going for them, huh?" I laugh, and he smiles. "I can't believe that check, that's not like them. They don't just hand out money
We head inside, and I take a deep breath, walking into our house. My family's house always makes me feel happy, like I'm somewhere safe and full of love. Mom's burning some cinnamon candle, and I can hear noise from the kitchen. "What's that smell?" Kent asks, and I laugh. "Mom loves scented candles, it's probably some clearance one that she picked up from somewhere," I explain, unsure where the nearly offensive candle was. Kent hated strong scents; he claimed they gave him headaches. "Sorry." "It's okay, just... don't go burning anything like that at our place," he says, and I chuckle, reaching for his hand. "Hello?" I call, bringing Kent to the kitchen, and mom gasps, hopping up from the stove and running over. "Juls," she whispers, squeezing the life out of me. "I'm so glad you could come." "Me too, I missed you," I whisper, and she pulls back, rubbing my arms in that aggressive mom-like way. "And I missed you, oh! You're so beautiful and smart-" "Okay, mom," I mumble, and s