Mac didn't want me.
It was obvious from the first moment we felt the bond between us, I knew it from the first time he stared into my eyes without any emotion. There was no room for me in his heart.When I was much younger, I would sit in front of the mirror, staring at my reflection as my mother combed my hair, softly narrating her love story, how she met my father, her mate, all over again as I smiled at her reflection in the mirror, this was our routine, and she had told me the story of how she met my father a million times, yet every time it felt just as special to me, just as brand new as she brushed my hair and whispered the tale all over again with tears filling my eyes as she smiled down at me.It was apparent who her love belonged to, but I knew it also belonged to me, even though not as intently as it did to my father.I was lucky to live their love, and even though she eventually faded into nothing but a memory, I lived my life waiting for that one-moment love to find me and capture me the way it captured my mother, completely, wholly, totally, and without any hesitation at all.Mac was supposed to be my forever love, I didn't know much of what went on in the moon goddess head, but I knew one thing, we were meant to be heads over heels for each other.Over the years, I had watched and observed as my sisters got paired with their mates, each one of them swearing their heart beats a thousand times at the presence of him; I mean, I could see the passion in their eyes as they stared at each other, It was hard to miss the lovey eyes and the touches they snuck when they felt no one was looking.But when I looked at Mac, I saw no passion in his eyes, no hunger, no lust, no feeling towards me, he was definitely not trying to touch me either and instead he stared at me like I was nothing but an obstruction, a look of nonchalance and belittlement that scared me completely. Like I was some insignificant girl and not his mate, a look I had gotten too familiar with seeing among my sisters; being the last born with so many years between us, I could understand that my sisters and I were not in the same world.But not my mate, the one who was supposed to be my person, and yet, my mate didn't want me; I can't think of a more cruel fate than that. “Earth to Fiona,” Amanda snapped her fingers before my eyes, we were doing the laundry, and I had zoned out again; how typical.“ Do you think I should try seducing him? I mean, that could help his emotions show more” I bit my fingers, looking hopefully at my sister.“We've gone over this Fi. If he wants you, he will show you; you don't have to work for anything; he is probably just processing things in his head right now.”“ I don't know, Amanda, you didn't see the way he looked at me like I was the most boring thing on earth. What if he doesn't want me? What would I do with a mate I am destined to love for a thousand years?”“ Come on, Fi, I don't have all the answers, but I'm pretty sure the moon goddess does, so trust her, okay? Now let's get to work or would you rather I retell the tale of how I met Rein’ she smiled mischievously.I spread my two palms across my face, mortified. ‘Not again, Amanda.’She chuckled, shaking her head, and we returned to folding the laundry while my mind wandered away.“ You know, it was surprising for the both of you to find out like that; it must be a bit harder on him” She brought me out of my reverie. "What if he has a girlfriend?’ I finally voiced the thought that had been sitting idly in my head. Amanda laughed, waving her hand in the air ‘ oh silly, that would be so dramatic right? Except she would have to give him up for you duh"I let my mind wander off again. Sure, we were both startled when it suddenly happened. Could that be the reason? I decided that I would confront Mac in secret and see if anything about him had changed. I had to know that my fate wasn’t sealed yet, that I wasn't doomed and I still had hope for love.I continued folding the laundry while Amanda gushed about her mate Rein, they had met a few years ago, and it was apparent they were still so passionate about each other; Father didn't want them to live together because he wanted them officially married, although it had no meaning to us as werewolves, Living in this world where we rarely went by our wolf form he wanted things to be done rightly and since Rein was unsettled at the time, juggling between running professionally and fulfilling his duties to the pack, they had to hold things off temporarily.Still, it was so obvious that they burned for each other that their hearts beat ferociously with the mere thought that they existed in the same time and space.As I watched Amanda go on about all the things they did and told each other, her eyes twinkling in adoration and love, I felt a twinge of jealousy. More than a twinge if I am being honest, I had met Rein before, so as much as I hated to admit it, I knew she was telling the truth about their love. I sighed. I had just one thought.Would it be too much to ask Mac to look at me this way? Like his mate and forever love? Like he couldn't live without me? I decided I was not going to give up easily on this, I had waited 20 years of my life for the perfect person for me while watching others pair off with the love of their lives at 18.This was my chance for that, the Moon goddess had smiled at me, and I was not going to let it go without a fight, I would visit Mac and get him to look at me with adoration, I would get him to hunger for me to love me and no matter how difficult it gets I would persist because, after all, he was the moon goddesses choice for me.The silence in the house told me exactly what I wanted to hear. I waited till everyone had gone to sleep, it was a crazy idea, and no one would have tolerated it anyway, so I had to be wise and do things on my own. Immediately we put the laundry away, Father returned, and Amanda rushed to serve and attend to him while I sat there, consumed by my thoughts and plans to visit Mac. I had gone over the idea about a million times in one night, yet I could not foresee it ending in a good way. It also gave me the perfect time to take some money for a cab. After assessing the house from what I could hear, I climbed down slowly from the bed, thankfully Amanda was such a deep sleeper; it didn't matter the noise that was being made, nothing could separate her from her lovely sleep, and we were the only ones who shared a room with a window big enough to allow my tiny frame to pass through. I jumped into my freest pair of jeans and hoodie. I needed the comfort first and then carefully, l let my
His ocean Blue eyes were shining in the dark. They were so beautiful and alluring; they pulled me in. The moon goddess really loves me to have paired me with someone as dreamy as Mac. It made me so happy to know that he was here, staring at me, that I could hold his attention for this long, I could still feel his stare burning into my skin, and it made me feel hot in places that had no business being hot. What was so different now? Maybe he was shy? I mean, right now his inability to keep his eyes off me shows a great level of interest, and I wonder what happened earlier when we met, why he couldn't even spare me a glance when we realised that we were mates. I mean, it was a casual drop-off by my father and he got to find out that the daughter of his father's chauffeur was his mate so it must have been so shocking and extremely cringe to him right? That must have made him shy, right? I was snapped from my thoughts by the jerk of a warm hand pulling me behind the curtain. That was q
There were so many things I expected when I finally regained consciousness When my body betrayed me by coming awake. The sexy stranger and I being tied up before a number of stern-looking alphas, Mac staring at me with the same nonchalant expression and now maybe more of hatred and disappointment? Father’s voice and eminent disappointment grounding me and expressing how foolish my decisions were, my sisters staring at me with pity and disdain and whoever read out my punishment according to the law, Amanda looking at me with a look that screamed betrayal and how could you? Mr. Ashen banning me from his estate and declaring that I was unfit for the position of Luna and I was forbidden from ever setting my eyes on his son. the ‘i told you’ look on the butler's stern face. But of all the things I imagined, never in a million years and lifetimes could I have imagined that I would wake up in my own room and on my own bed. That I would find myself in my room, on my bed with my jeans and sw
By the time I returned from walking around the neighborhood and sitting idly in a park while obsessing over the events of last night, my brain was tired of drawing conclusions that led nowhere. I met my entire family all hurdled over the dining table and eating. Father was smiling so brightly, as Gwen chatted something about her husband's field, I wondered when she arrived. I could tell Father was excited to be having a meal with his girls and when he saw me, his smile only increased. “You're back, I heard you went out for an unusual morning run.'' He teased, smiling with his eyes while he beckoned me to come over and join them at the table. Father certainly didn't know anything about last night. I walked over and took a seat at the dining table, Gisselle and Amanda stared at me weirdly, exchanging looks and finally accepting that I actually went jogging. All through my time out, I kept thinking, How did I get home? What exactly happened? It was driving me insane so severely that I
The silence in the house was deafening. once the door behind me was successfully locked everything came to a halt. I caught my sisters and my father all huddled around the dining table looking guilty, they had been eavesdropping and from the looks on their faces they knew I was well aware. Too tired and heartbroken to deal with any of it, I walked briskly into the room I shared with Amanda and shut the door loudly caging myself in. I climbed up to my bed and the waterworks officially began. Is love meant to hurt like this? Was I not enough? Did he have the faintest idea of the agony he put me through each time I stumbled through his emptiness and emotionless feelings toward me. I should have known he would only come here for intel, to use me, maybe there was nothing I could do to make this man love me. The tears flowed in harder in loud angry sobs and I was grateful to have locked the door behind me, I really didn't need anyone's counsel at the moment, I was too occupied with the voi
Who the hell was L? What did that even mean, I had a faint idea that it was the blue eyed stranger who probably dropped me that left the note here, but it didn't make any sense. What was the blue orchid for? And what was the meaning of L. a name? Luther? Lark? Lionell? These are the names that could suit him but they didn't feel quite right. Amanda cleared her throat, dragging not only my eyes but my attention to her. “ What is that about? And who is L? Spill before I betray you as you did” I sighed, exhausted If only she knew I had no answers to her questions. “ I'm just like you, I am as confused as you are” I said wearily. She studied me for a while and I knew she was deciding whether or not to believe me. Finally she said, “You know what? Lets just drop this, there has been enough drama to last a while in this family anyway” I nodded my head while looking away wistfully, trying to make sense of things and trying to understand what was really going on. Things were getting way mo
This could not be happening There was no way it was possible and I had just once again conjured images myself. I blinked, struck too quickly by the intensity of his eyes and just to confirm that I wasnt seeing things and when I opened my eyes again, he was gone. I stood there for a few seconds, my mouth hanging open, before the brain cells in my head began to work and I registered, I really actually saw him. I dashed to the front of the building to check if I could see any traces of him. , My breathing was erratic, my composure non existent, I was distressed and very confused but I kept searching and searching till after a few minutes when I finally accepted that he was nowhere to be found. He had disappeared, literally. It had to be a joke, right? It had to be some sort of mind play, I turned around in confusion. One moment he was there, and just before I could look he was gone. It made no sense at all, It made me very furious in fact, Was he messing with me? Why did he keep playi
CHAPTER NINE After getting my ears full with the scolding and stern words meted out by my sisters, I dragged myself to the room and shut the door lightly then gently eased onto my bed, I was emotionally tired, it was so difficult for me to stay without obsessing over the fact that some of the things that happened within the last twenty four hours happened, for example, How did I meet him and lose him yet again. Did i even meet him? Did I conjure up an imagination? Could he disappear? Was that even possible? So many questions. floated around in my head. I knew he was a wolf from the first time we were at close proximity, my wolf had sensed his wolf right away, but was he a special breed? Could something like that be possible? The events of the past week had consumed my mind so much and distracted me from thinking about Mac, But now, it was like a magazine and my brain flipped over to his page, How could he leave me there knowing I was stranded? How heartless of him to do that to me,
After the very intense and romantic dinner, which mainly consisted of Lucas staring at me with his electric blue orbs and me trying not to puke everything that had entered my belly due to the intensity in his eyes, he led us quietly back into the room where I perched awkwardly at the edge of the bed. "Where is everyone?" I whispered. I couldn't help but note the differences between his and Mac's houses. No pack members were sprawling around here, and no slaves or workers were moving to do his bidding. I was curious: was this how he lived as an Alpha?"I dismissed them," Lucas replied, dispersing the chaos in my mind. That made sense, I thought. Lucas continued to stare at me with something like longing in his eyes, and I had no idea what to do. He had said nothing would happen tonight, so why did he stare at me like that?As if sensing my thoughts, his long fingers wrapped around my jaw smoothly. " Don't think too much, just stay here with me." "What attracted you to me?" I whisper
"Oh, my goodness! I've told you, Amanda, I'm not going for something extra and shiny; I want something simple and nice!" She smirked as she handed me yet another one of her extravagant dresses. "You mean something cute and sexy?" My face went up in flames. "Oh my god! Amanda! For the hundredth time, we are not doing anything tonight!" "Oh yeah, and that's why you are spending the night with him?" "Urghhhh," I whinnied, covering my face with my hands at her absolute morbidity. It was practically impossible to win with this girl. In her most innocent voice, she added, "Well, since you claim it is nothing sensual, then you probably wouldn't want to wear a dress like this." She held up a red dress, and I lost my breath. "That's it," I whispered, and with one final squeal, I ran into the bathroom to get changed. At exactly seven pm, the doorbell rang, and Amanda ran excitedly to open it while I finished up my outfit. Spritzing perfume and taking deep breaths. I walked out to
Two weeks later, there was no word from Lucas. If I had not seen the weary news and heard the whispered rumors I would have been scared, but now I was more upset than anything. His plans were already in motion. It was one downfall to the other of the Ashen subsidiaries, and the tabloid made sure everyone knew. Between clans, they could tell that things were looking bad for the Ashens. Even though they played all the cards they had, Lucas was smarter, strategically utilizing all his inside men to break down the very foundation of their business. Father kept us updated as he continued working there, despite the fresh rage I had seen in his eyes after that discussion and the hunger for revenge for Mom. He kept us updated on the incessant fights that kept happening while also trying to gather some men who were formally of our pack before they became slaves as a means of survival. I sighed for the fifth time, watching as the red mother broadcaster spoke about an outbreak of fire in the
When I got in, Father pulled me into a big, tight hug that left me both shocked and in awe, and I went to bed tipsy with happiness and the euphoria of everything that had happened. Finally, it felt like everything was all coming together, so for that night, I swallowed the questions I had for Father and basked in the sheer joy in the air, falling asleep with a huge smile on my face and a weight lifted from my chest. Soon, very soon, we will all witness the heavy downfall of Mac and the entire Ashen family. ****** The smell of pancakes and bacon that wafted through the air the next morning told me of my sister's arrival. Father must have called them over last night, and that could only mean that we were having a family meeting. I jumped down from the bed, excited to see them and eat delicious food after such a long time. "Fiona darling," Giselle's slender arms wrapped around me as I stepped into the kitchen, looking as ivory and as beautiful as ever with that flowery scent that ma
The ride home was silent and filled with the many words and thoughts running through our minds. I finally had enough time to process everything Lucas told me, which was a lot. The plan was for him to drop me off, but I knew I was going to tell my family the truth about everything that occurred many years ago and find out why Father hid so many things from me. Even if Lucas was fine with being the bad guy and being blamed for things he had no hand in, I wasn't okay with it, and I needed to get it out.I glanced at the brooding man on the wheel. Ever since we managed to pry ourselves apart and his almost confession, he had been unusually quiet and even more brooding, like he was lost in thought in a space of his own, and I had no idea how to reach him. "What's going on?" I asked, turning to face him and taking him in more; we had spent the past days together, yet he still looked handsome in a new way. I still couldn't get over how handsome he was. I didn't think it would ever be somet
Somehow the kiss transcended from my little kiss as Lucas took control, fighting with every urge in his body against his wold from ripping my clothes and taking me, and I could feel it in every strain as he deepened the kiss, picking me up from the floor, I wrapped my legs instinctively around his waist as I went in for more, grabbing a handful of his shirt. The desire I felt eroded my senses, but I knew it was nothing compared to the one a person with full access to his alpha wolf felt; all I got from my wolf was an intense need and constant purring, which rang out as moans as Lucas raked his hands hastily from my back to my waist repeatedly.Carefully and still deep in the kiss, he led me back into the room till I was dropped softly against the soft sheets and towered by him. My heart seized as I stared at his almost black-blue eyes now, electricity running up and down his blue orbs and desire fueling them so passionately I felt dizzy for a second. My own need propelled me to wrap m
"No," Lucas thundered, taking my soft fists in his large ones. I expected this, so I didn't budge. I added calmly, "I wasn't asking for your permission, Lucas. I was simply letting you know I am all in on this." "I don't want to drag you down this path. The Ashens are ruthless and very crafty. You are not ready, and I would hate for any harm to come to you on my account." "You think I don't know they are ruthless? Do you think I have no idea how crafty they can be when I have been a victim myself? I am well aware, and it is my knowledge that fuels my anger." I paused, inhaling deeply. "I, too, have been offended, and I am itching for my revenge, So train me or protect me. Whatever makes you feel better, but know that I will not sit and watch idly, and I will make Mac pay whether or not you let me in on this. I will beat him at his own game," I fought. He stared at me warily for a while before heaving a breath and nodding. "I will not put you in harm's way, but I will train you we
Lucas didn't come in for at least twenty minutes, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stop thinking about the big bulge in his pants when he walked out of the room. I had felt it earlier when I laid down, and now it has become the most fascinating and most terrifying thing to me, but I just couldn't breathe my head to kick out the thought.I lay beneath the duvet, covering my red-coated face and my swollen lips from the past few minutes, my heart was still racing as though I had just run a marathon, and particles of the lightheadedness I felt when Lucas was kissing me still remained. I missed him immediately when he left, as he walked out of the door, as soon as his hands left my body. I came to the slow realization that my feelings for Lucas were rapidly changing into something big and beyond my control it was only a matter of time before they blew up in my face. The air in the room still smelled like him, like wood and soap and masculine sweat and for a second I imagined hi
Lucas caught up with me in no time, but I refused to give in when his large arms encircled me again. I thrashed against his body and bumped into trees hoping to scratch and loosen his death grip on me. "I'm sorry, Fiona, But listen, Hear me out first," He said, not sounding a minute breathless or like someone carrying a thrashing girl. "No, let me go!" I thrashed and kicked around the open air "You're only going to hurt yourself, Fiona," Lucas growled. " Stay put and listen to what I have to say for your own sake." "No, you listen to me, Let. Me. Go." I protested. Lucas sighed and wrapped his hand even firmer around my torso. "Why do you choose the wrong times to be stubborn and throw a tantrum? Do you have any idea how difficult it has been for me to watch you fawn over someone as horrible as Mactervish?" He scoffed, then continued in a ludicrous manner, "Or should I speak about how worried I have been every second that you have spent with him? dined with him, sat with him, a