CHAPTER TEN

Scarlet flew through the night, circling high above her hometown, looking down at all the houses lit up in the darkness. They all looked so cozy from here, a million sparks of light flickering amongst the trees she crossed over. Scarlet imagined the families that must be in these homes, perhaps sitting down for dinner, laughing and enjoying themselves, normal, functional families getting together as they did every night. Perhaps they would have dinner, followed by TV, then homework. Perfect, happy families, without a worry in the world.

Scarlet craved a family like that now more than ever.

She wiped tears away as she thought of her own house, her own family. On the surface they seemed like the perfect family in the perfect town, seemed perfectly functional; yet she felt as if her family was all broken, as dysfunctional as every other dysfunctional family. Scarlet had felt so close to her mother her whole life, yet after reading her diary entry, Scarlet could not help but feel as if her mother wanted her dead. Scarlet had felt close to her father, too, and she couldn’t understand: how could he possibly have let her mother feel that way about her? Was he complicit?

They looked at her now as if she were some sort of freak, some sort of monster; she felt that now all they had for her was disapproval, no matter what she did. They just didn’t understand her. They wouldn’t take the time to listen to her, to hear her point of view; they were always so quick to rush to judgment and disapproval. As much as she loved them, she really hated that part of them. Why couldn’t they just talk to her, just try to find out what was going on with her, instead of rushing to condemn her?

Scarlet flew over her house, high above, and saw it, somewhere down below amidst the lights flickering between the trees. She knew it would be so easy to just dive down and enter it. And yet, the easiest route was also the hardest. Scarlet felt she couldn’t go home, felt that she didn’t really have a home anymore to go home to. Something inside her had irrevocably changed. She didn’t really trust her parents anymore, and she didn’t trust them to understand what she was going through.

She didn’t want to be with them, at least not now, during this fragile time. For now, she wanted to be with Sage. She felt somehow he would understand better than her family. She wanted Sage and no one else.

Scarlet brushed her tears away, knowing that Sage was gone, wherever he was. He had boarded up his house and fled like a thief in the night. It was as if he had never been.

Scarlet cried as she flew through the air, the thought devastating her. She had cared about him. Didn’t he know that?

Scarlet flew for hours, circling aimlessly, second-guessing herself, trying to decide where to go. Maybe she should just leave this town together, she thought, just take off completely.

But something inside Scarlet was not quite ready to leave yet. She still felt a lack of resolve about Sage, and she felt she needed to try to find out more about what happened to him. She couldn’t just walk away. And as she wondered how to find out more, she kept thinking of her high school, of the other people who might have seen him.

She thought once again of her friends, of her plan of visiting them. She recalled the last time she saw them, at the school bonfire; it hadn’t gone well. Yet as she thought about it, Scarlet realized she didn’t care if they hated her anymore; she just needed to find Sage. And they were the only people she knew who might have heard something.

As Scarlet circled, she decided, for Sage’s sake, to swallow her pride and seek out her friends. She couldn’t seek out Maria, not after the fight they’d had. Jasmine, though, she’d always been able to talk reason to. Even if Maria had turned Jasmine against her, maybe Jasmine would listen to reason coming from Scarlet—at least long enough to tell her if she knew anything about where Sage was. That was all she needed. That, and maybe to crash there for the night until she could figure out where to go next.

Resolved, Scarlet turned and flew away from town, heading to the outskirts, to the more rural areas, the neighborhoods with the one-story ranches, pickups in the driveways, larger lots, and gravel driveways, until she found Jasmine’s house, easy to spot from above, with its beat-up red pickup in the front, and its large plastic sculpture in the front yard—of what, Scarlet could never figure out.

As Scarlet flew lower she saw the house was all lit up and felt a sense of relief. At least she was home.

Scarlet set down behind Jasmine’s house, behind the trees, where no one would see her. She walked across the grass, crunchy with frost beneath her feet, and headed up the back steps of Jasmine’s deck, as she had a million times before, when they were friends. Now it felt weird walking up them, as if she were intruding.

Scarlet’s heart was pounding as she nervously wondered if this was all a bad idea, if Maria had succeeded in completely turning Jasmine against her.

Scarlet walked up to the door, the porch creaking beneath her feet, and rang the bell.

She waited, heart pounding, and as she stood there, she heard a lot of activity inside, kids laughing, talking to each other, music—the muted beats of a Britney Spears song in the background. She wondered what was going on—when she heard someone walking toward the door.

Scarlet braced herself as she saw Jasmine opening the door.

Jasmine stood there, looking at her in shock.

“OMG,” Jasmine said slowly. “Scarlet. Like, I thought you were dead. Everyone did.”

They both stood there, not knowing what to say in the awkward silence.

“Well, I’m alive,” Scarlet finally said, “as you can see.”

“OMG, like what happened to you? Like, where have you been?” Jasmine pressed.

Scarlet began to play with her hair unconsciously, nervous.

“It’s a long story,” she said. “I really don’t want to get into right now. I’m just wondering if I can, like, crash.”

Jasmine hesitated, eyes wide with surprise, and her gaze hardened.

“Scarlet, we were all like best friends, but after what you did to Maria, it’s really hard to like still be friends you. Like the four of us were like gold. You can’t steal someone else’s guy. Like I would never do that to you. And it’s really hard to trust you now knowing that you did that to Maria.”

Scarlet frowned, half expecting something like this. Maria had always had such a sway over Jasmine and Becca.

“That’s Maria’s perspective,” Scarlet pointed out. “I didn’t steal anyone. Sage sought me out. He likes me. He never liked Maria. If he liked her, he could have had her and she could have had him. I never would’ve gotten in the way. But he didn’t. I can’t make him like somebody he doesn’t want to like. How is that my fault?”

Jasmine bit her lip, unsure.

“Well,” she said, hesitant, “that’s not the way I heard it. I heard you like stole him away.”

“That’s not true.”

“Look, Scarlet, this is, like, really awkward,” she said. “I don’t want to be put between you and Maria. I’m like really good friends with Maria and—”

Suddenly the door opened wider, and Scarlet’s throat went dry as she saw Maria standing behind Jasmine, glaring back at her.

Scarlet braced herself for the tirade to follow. She felt mortified that Maria was here, had been here this whole time, listening. As she heard the noise behind them, Scarlet envisioned all kinds of kids in the house, and she felt mortified that they saw her, that they heard all this. She had thought she could take solace here, and she had unintentionally walked into some kind of party.

“Jasmine, it’s okay,” Maria said, putting a hand on her shoulder and motioning Scarlet in. “Let her in.”

“Um, what?” Jasmine said, confused. “I thought you like hated her.”

Scarlet was confused, too. She had been so sure Maria despised her.

“It really doesn’t matter anymore,” Maria said. “I’m over Sage. I’m so over him. She can have him, totally. I’ve got someone new in my life that makes Sage seem like nothing.”

Scarlet noticed Maria was beaming, could see that she was genuinely happy. It was the look Maria had whenever she had a new boyfriend.

Scarlet was happy for her, and relieved, if confused, that Maria was no longer upset with her. Scarlet didn’t understand how she could have found someone so quickly, but she welcomed it. At first she wondered if Maria was joking; but as Maria stepped forward and reached out a hand, she realized she was being genuine.

“Truce?” Maria asked.

Maria smiled wide, and Scarlet reached out and shook her hand, and Maria stepped up and hugged her.

“Who cares about the guys anyway?” Maria said. “Guys come and go. But we’re like forever, you know?”

Scarlet hugged her back, and over her shoulder she saw Jasmine’s expression soften. Becca came over, too, and it was clear that, if Maria had reconciled with her, the others were willing to as well.

Becca and Jasmine stepped forward and hugged Scarlet, and she felt all the tension in the air dissipate.

“Close the door, it’s cold,” Jasmine said.

Scarlet stepped inside, and Jasmine closed the door behind her. Scarlet followed the girls as they walked through the house, a little curious.

“What’s going on here anyway?” Scarlet asked. “What’s with the music? Do I hear voices?”

“The basement,” Jasmine said. “We’re pre-gaming for tonight.”

“What’s tonight?” Scarlet asked, confused.

“Duh, it’s only Bannerman’s,” Becca said. “Every year, the night after the bonfire, don’t you remember?”

Bannerman’s, Scarlet thought, and then she remembered. It was that small, abandoned island in the middle of the Hudson. She remembered last year, all the kids taking motorboats out there, a small abandoned island with the ruins of a castle on it. They had taken it over for the night, lighting bonfires, drinking beers, roasting marshmallows. Last year it had seemed so bold and fun to her.

Now, though, the thought of it just seemed cold and exhausting. It was not what Scarlet wanted. She just wanted to get some peace and quiet, to get away from the world, and to find out anything she could about Sage.

But as Scarlet followed them down the steps, she realized it was not meant to be. The basement was filled with a dozen kids, friends of friends, sitting around laughing, drinking beers from plastic cups. As Scarlet looked at all the faces, her heart suddenly pounded to see that Blake was here. He stood in the corner with a few of his jock friends, laughing too loud, and she immediately turned her head and went off to the far corner, hoping he hadn’t spotted her.

“So you have to tell us,” Becca said, as they all gathered around Scarlet. “Like what happened to you?”

“What do you mean?” Scarlet asked, tensing up inside.

“We heard you kicked Vivian’s butt last night,” Becca said. “That you were stronger than god. And that you took off like so fast no one could find you.”

“And like your mom and dad have been texting the whole school looking for you,” Jasmine added.

“I heard the cops are out looking for you,” Maria added. “Like that you’re missing or something.”

Scarlet felt a pang of guilt as she thought of how upset her parents must be, of how they must be out looking for her. A part of her wanted to go back to them; but another part of her needed more time to understand why her mom wanted her dead.

For now, she just needed to calm her friends down and get them to stop pressing her; Scarlet hated being in the limelight.

She shrugged.

“My parents always freak out when I’m not home right away,” Scarlet said. “They call the cops way too easily. It’s like nothing. Don’t worry.”

The girls nodded in understanding.

“My parents are ridiculous, too,” Jasmine said. “The only reason I’m having people over tonight is because they’re out of town. But when I go anywhere, they’ve got like the whole military out looking for me.”

“You seem okay to me,” Becca said.

“I’m fine,” Scarlet assured her.

“And like, what happened between you and Sage?” Maria asked.

Scarlet looked at her, worried to bring up the topic, but she could see there was no jealousy left in her eyes—only genuine curiosity.

Scarlet sighed.

“He stood me up,” she said. “I don’t know where he is.”

Becca rolled her eyes. “Guys. They’re the worst. I hate being stood up. You should dump him.”

Scarlet furrowed her brow.

“Have any of you seen him or heard anything? I mean about where he is?” Scarlet asked them, looking at each one, hopeful.

They all shook their heads.

Jasmine said, “Why bother if he stood you up?”

“I just need to talk to him,” Scarlet replied.

“Why don’t you like text or call him?” Becca asked.

“He’s not picking up his cell,” Scarlet said. “So, have any of you heard anything?”

They all looked at each other blankly, and shook their heads.

“If I did I’d tell you,” Becca said. “But that guy, he’s like a mystery man. No one ever sees him for more than a second.”

Scarlet’s heart fell. She had so been hoping that one of her friends had seen or heard something. It was the best bet that she had, since they were her eyes and ears inside the high school. She was crestfallen, and felt like crying inside. Maybe he really had left.

“Maria’s got a new man,” Jasmine said, smiling, changing the subject.

Scarlet smiled at Maria, happy for her, and Maria blushed.

“Good for you, Maria,” Scarlet said. “Who is he?”

“Only the most gorgeous guy I’ve ever seen,” she said. “He’s like a man, not a boy. He drives this awesome Maserati, and he wears the most expensive clothes. He said this week he would take me out to the city. Can you imagine?”

Scarlet looked at her, wondering who this person could be. It sounded too good to be true.

“Just be careful,” Scarlet warned.

Maria’s expression darkened.

“What do I need to be careful about? He’s perfect.”

Scarlet held up a palm.

“I’m just saying.”

“There you are,” came a voice.

Scarlet turned, and her stomach dropped as she saw Blake standing opposite her, smiling, wearing a plaid shirt, hands in the front pockets of his jeans. His hair was tousled, and he was a bit unshaven. He looked down at her as if he was really close to her.

“You’re like the hardest person to find these days,” he said. “Did you get any of my texts?”

Scarlet stared at him blankly, not having a clue what he was talking about.

“Which text?”

“I’ve been texting you off the hook.”

“Sorry, my phone broke,” she said.

He shrugged.

“Anyway here you are. You coming with us tonight? To Bannerman’s?”

Scarlet looked at the others, unsure, and they all nodded vigorously back at her.

“You have to come,” Maria said, stepping forward, linking arms with her.

“Of course she’s coming,” Maria volunteered to Blake. “She wouldn’t miss it.”

“Awesome,” Blake said. “We’ll ride out on the same boat.”

Scarlet went with the others to the couch and sat down, staring, thinking, and did not take the drink they offered to her. All the others drank as they turned up the music, laughing and having fun with each other, and in their joy, not one of them noticed that Scarlet was sitting there, despondent, wanting to be anywhere but here, not knowing what to do, and wishing the world would end.