Chapter 1

The air was suffocating, thick with the smell of rain-soaked concrete and freshly cut grass. I tightened the grip on my umbrella, the cold metal biting into my palm as I trudged through the muddy pathway leading to Jarem’s apartment. I’m not sure why I’m here. I wasn’t supposed to be. Not tonight, not when he was still mad at me for demanding a little bit of his time. But I feel this gnawing tug in my gut urging me to come. I sighed, trying to compose myself, as I felt the need to puke. Call it what you want, intuition or paranoia, but it had been eating me all day.

Jarem... he had been distant lately. Not in the obvious way, no. He still smiled at me, he still kissed me on the forehead like he always did. But his eyes... they no longer lingered on me. His laughter felt hollow, like it belonged to a script he was so tired of reading. Was he tired of me too?

As I reached his door, I felt my world stop. The faint sound of laughter drifted through the cracks, muffled but unmistakable. It wasn’t just any woman’s laugh. It was her laugh. Lili, my best friend. I am certain it’s hers, I’ve heard it a hundred times. But it can’t be. My best friend would never betray me like that.

My hand froze mid-air, hovering over the doorknob. My breath hitched as my thoughts spiraled. There had to be an explanation. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I was hearing things. My heart was pounding so loudly in my chest that I could barely hear anything over the roar of blood rushing through my ears.

But then, her voice floated through the cracks of the door. Clear, distinct, and undeniable. “You’re terrible, Jarem. What if she finds out?”

I staggered back, as if the words had struck me like a physical blow. My chest constricted painfully, and my grip on the umbrella faltered. My lungs burned with every shallow, ragged breath I took. I wanted to scream, to burst through the door and demand answers, but my body refused to move.

Jarem’s voice followed—soft, coaxing, and far too familiar. “Relax, babe. She’s too trusting to even think about it. You’re the only one I care about.”

A low sob escaped my lips before I could clamp my hand over my mouth. My knees buckled, and I leaned against the wall for support, the cold, damp surface seeping through my coat. My mind raced, replaying every little moment, every suspicious glance, every late-night excuse. How could I have been so blind?

I couldn’t stop myself. My trembling hand reached for the doorknob and turned it slowly. The door creaked open, revealing the dimly lit living room. And there they were, Lili and Jarem, tangled together on the couch, their laughter fading into stunned silence as they noticed me standing in the doorway.

“Tasia!” Lili’s voice was a mixture of shock and guilt. She scrambled to push herself off Jarem, her hair disheveled and her face flushed. “I… I can explain!”

“Explain?” My voice cracked, raw and trembling with hurt. My umbrella clattered to the floor as I stepped into the room, my eyes darting between the two people I had trusted most in the world. “Explain what, Lili? That you’ve been sneaking around with my boyfriend? That you’ve been lying to me this whole time?”

Jarem stood up, his hands raised as if in surrender. “Tasia, don’t do this. It’s not what it looks like.”

“Not what it looks like?” I repeated, my voice rising with each word. Tears blurred my vision, but I refused to let them fall. “I’m looking at it, Jarem! Are you fucking kidding me?”

Lili took a shaky step forward, her eyes glistening with tears. “Tasia, please... I didn’t mean for this to happen. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

A bitter laugh escaped my lips, sharp and hollow. “But you already did, Lili,” I said, my voice laced with pain and fury. I felt my emotions spiraling out of control, like a dam had finally burst, releasing the flood of betrayal and heartbreak that had been building inside me.

My hands clenched into fists at my sides as I took a step back, away from both of them. The room felt too small, too suffocating. Jarem’s apartment, once a place I had called a second home, now felt like a prison. My chest tightened as I looked at them, the two people who had meant everything to me.

“Tasia,” Jarem began, his voice low and pleading. “We didn’t mean for you to find out like this. It’s complicated—”

“Complicated?” I cut him off, my voice rising. “You slept with my bestfriend, Jarem! MY BESTFRIEND. There’s nothing complicated about that.”

I turned my gaze back to Lili, who had the audacity to look ashamed. Good. She should be ashamed. “You were supposed to be my sister,” I said, my voice trembling. “You were supposed to have my back, no matter what. And instead, you were stabbing me in it.”

“Tasia, I’m sorry,” Lili whispered, tears streaming down her face. “I never wanted this to happen. I never wanted to hurt you.”

“Then why did you do it?” I demanded, my voice breaking. “Why, Lili? Was it worth it? Was he worth it?”

She didn’t answer. She just stood there, her lips quivering, her silence speaking volumes. And that was the final blow. She couldn’t even give me an explanation, not one that would make sense, not one that would make this hurt any less.

The room spun as I stood there, the weight of their betrayal crashing down on me like a tidal wave. My chest heaved with uneven breaths, the air thick and suffocating. My vision blurred with tears, but I refused to let them see me fall apart. Not now. Not after what they had done to me.

“Say something, Lili!” I screamed, my voice raw and cracking under the strain of my emotions. “Anything! Tell me why you did this to me. Tell me why the one person I trusted the most threw me away like I was nothing!”

Lili stepped forward, her hands trembling as she reached out to me. Her face was streaked with tears, but all I could see was the betrayal etched in her features.

I backed away from her, my heart pounding so hard it felt like it would burst out of my chest. My legs shook beneath me, but I refused to crumble. Not here. Not in front of them. My gaze darted to Jarem, who stood frozen, his lips pressed into a thin line, as if he had nothing to say for himself.

“You’re both disgusting,” I choked out, my voice barely above a whisper. “You deserve each other.”

The words left my lips like a curse, but they did nothing to ease the ache in my chest. I turned on my heel, desperate to get out of that suffocating room, to put as much distance between myself and the two people who had shattered my world. My vision was blurred with tears as I stumbled toward the door, my breath hitching in my throat.

“Tasia, wait!” Lili’s voice called out behind me, frantic and desperate. I ignored her. I couldn’t bear to look at her or hear another word from her lying mouth.

But then I felt a hand grabbing my arm, yanking me back with more force than I expected. I spun around, my heart lurching, and came face-to-face with Lili. Her eyes were wide and glistening with tears, her grip on my arm tight and unyielding.

“You can’t just leave like this!” she cried, her voice breaking. “I need you to understand—”

I cut her off, yanking my arm free from her grasp. My voice was a mix of fury and disbelief. “What exactly am I supposed to understand, Lili? That you’re a backstabbing liar? There’s nothing to understand! You are trying to make me understand but you don’t even bother explaining?”

Her face crumpled, but I didn’t care. I was done feeling sorry for her. I was done feeling anything for her. I turned away again, ready to leave and slam the door behind me, but she grabbed me once more, her desperation palpable.

“Tasia, please!” she begged, her voice rising with panic. “Don’t walk away. Don’t do this.”

My patience snapped. I wrenched my arm free again, harder this time, and stumbled back. “Do what, Lili? Leave? What other choice do I have? You’ve already taken everything from me!”

She reached out again, her movements frantic and uncoordinated, and that’s when it happened. I don’t know if it was the rain-soaked shoes I was still wearing or the slickness of the hardwood floor, but as she grabbed for me, I felt myself lose my footing. My arms flailed as I tried to steady myself, but it was no use. My back hit the edge of the open balcony door, and before I could register what was happening, I was falling.

Time seemed to slow as the world tilted around me. The air was cold and sharp against my skin as I plunged backward, the ground rushing up to meet me. My mind screamed in terror, but my voice was lost in the wind. All I could see was Lili’s horrified face as she stood frozen on the balcony, her hands outstretched as if she could somehow catch me, somehow undo what had just happened.

“Anastasia!” her voice echoed, high-pitched and filled with panic.

For a brief moment, I felt weightless, suspended between life and death. My heart pounded in my chest, each beat a painful reminder of what I was about to lose. The betrayal, the heartbreak, the anger—all of it faded away, replaced by a cold, numbing fear. This couldn’t be happening. This couldn’t be how it ended.

I thought of my family, of my dreams, of all the things I would never get to say or do. Regret clawed at my chest as I fell, the world around me a blur of darkness and rain. And then, just before everything went black, I thought of Lili’s voice, her words ringing in my ears like a cruel, final goodbye.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you, Tasia.”

But you already did, Lili.

The impact came fast and hard, a jarring, bone-crushing force that ripped the air from my lungs. Pain exploded through my body, sharp and all-consuming, before fading into a cold, numbing void. My vision blurred, the edges of the world fading into darkness. And then there was nothing.