Chapter Four

After taking the five minute drive across town, I pulled through the gate and down the paved driveway that led to my parent's house. Their land was immaculate. My father maintained every square inch of the acre around his house with amazing diligence. The grass on either side of the driveway was trimmed better than a soldier's haircut and the fence the surrounded the home was spotlessly white. My dad took pride in a well-maintained home. He always said that “Your home is the best representation of yourself.”

If that saying were true, then I wondered if I actually was a small and rickety old woman whose hinges creaked when the wind blew, just like my house did.

I was surprised to see how many cars were parked around the house. I knew there were going to be a fair amount of people, since these gatherings grew every single year. However, I didn't expect this many. There must have been thirty cars on either side of the driveway, which had become overflow parking because the spots around the house were already taken up. There were even two tractors parked along with them. For a couple of people in town, their tractor was their favorite source of transportation.

This is nuts, I thought, parking at the end of the line of cars. This has to be some kind of attendance record, I think.

When I got out of my car, the sweet smell of home cooking entered my nostrils. I could recognize everything that my parents had on the grill using only my nose. There were burgers, ribs, pork and of course, corn. In Iowa, corn was a staple. It was rare to eat a home cooked meal and not have some form of it on your plate.

Also in the air, was the sound of a banjo and drums. My parents had mentioned having one of the local bands come and play at the party, and they had apparently kept their word on it. But even louder than band, was the familiar roar of kids laughing and playing.

The sunshine poured over my fair skin as I made my way down the driveway toward the house. I was glad I'd put on sunscreen and had more in my purse. I went straight to the backyard. All I had to do was to follow my nose to figure out where the food was being served. When I turned the corner, my jaw practically hit the grass.

I could see families from all over town. There had to be well over twenty different families, all of them with a gaggle of children. It was a good thing my parents had a large yard because we never would have fit otherwise.

Dad was standing in front of the grill, carefully turning burgers over the flames. He was surrounded by five of his buddies, who were all chatting and laughing while they drank beer. My mom was at the opposite side of the yard. She was running around with a group of kids who appeared to have pulled her into an intense game of tag. The rest of the grass was covered with other neighbors and their families. I had never seen this many people in my parent's yard.

I'd hardly taken three steps toward the party before I felt something wrap around my leg. I squealed in surprise when I looked down to see Leigh Ann's bright blue eyes gazing back up at me.

“Aunt Hannah, you made it!” she said with the kind of energy and excitement that I wasn't sure if I was capable of mustering up even on my best of days.

“Hey, beautiful girl.” I picked her up and spun her around in a circle, letting her feet fly out away from me. “I missed you.”

She giggled loudly until I stopped spinning. “I missed you, too, Aunt Hannah. Mommy's right over there. We were building a castle in the sand box. Do you want to help?”

“Yes, I definitely do,” I said. “Give me a few minutes, though, okay? I just got here and want to say hi to my mom and dad.”

“Okay, that sounds good,” she said, her face beaming with happiness.

I set her back on the ground and watched her scurry across the grass, making her way back toward the group of kids who had gathered at the sandbox.

I only made it a few more steps before my mom saw me.

“Hannah!” she said, waving me over. “There you are. Come over here.”

I kicked off my sandals, letting the cool grass slide between my toes. Then I jogged across the yard toward where my mom.

“Alright, kids, I'm taking a quick break,” Mom told them. “Zachary, you're It!”

She tagged a little boy near her and he instantly turned and began chasing the other kids.

“Who's winning?” I asked with a smirk.

My mom caught her breath and pulled me in for a hug. We were the same height and similar build. I got my curly hair from her, but my eyes from my dad. “They are. I've got forty years on them, though. Doesn't seem quite fair.”

I laughed and squeezed her tight. “How are things going, Mom?”

“Things are slow,” she said, releasing me from the hug. “Slow and uneventful. Just the way your father and I like it around here. How about you? How's work going at the clinic? You settling in okay?”

“It's great,” I said, as we both started walking toward the other side of the yard where my father and his friends were hanging out. “I'm keeping busy over there, that's for sure. The time goes by quick when I'm at work. How's dad?”

Mom glanced around, making sure that no one could hear us. The kids were too busy playing tag and the other guests were crowded around the grill or near the music.

“He nearly fell this morning.” Mom's voice was quiet. “He's fine. He told me not to tell you, but...”

I wrapped my arm around my mother's shoulders. “Thanks for telling me. I'll make sure to check him over. I'm sure it's something simple.”

Mom nodded, her eyes going to her husband. There was a quiet sadness to her that I'd never seen before. She took a deep breath and then shook herself. Suddenly, she was back to the bright cheerful woman everyone knew my mother to be. I admired her strength in the face of losing her partner.

“Have you said hello to your father yet?” she asked, taking my arm and guiding me toward the grill. “He is trying this new marinade and it sounds absolutely amazing.”

***

Everyone rotated through various picnic tables and chairs positioned in the yard. There were too many families for everyone to eat all at once, so we took turns. I chose to eat with my parents and we all sat at the large picnic table under a sycamore tree. My mom was to my left and my dad was across from me. My best friend, Karina, was on my right. I decided I would stay close to family, rather than risk having to eat with Abigail St. James or some of the other popular girls that never left our town. I didn't need to be reminded of what I didn't have.

“It's nice to see you again, Hannah,” Dad said, settling into his seat. “You should come by more often. You know we only live five minutes from you.”

The sun reflected off of his bald head and lit up his red beard. He smiled and I knew I would hear that phrase from him many more times.

“Sorry, Dad,” I said, as I buttered up my grilled corn. “I'll try to be better about it. You know how it is, though. If you're busy, you're busy.”

“That's true,” he said. “We're happy to have you here. What's new on your side of town? Dating anyone?”

I forced a smile and looked around the table. All of our family and friends were listening in on the conversation. They were staring at me, waiting for a response. I felt my cheeks heat and I knew that I was blushing.

“No, Dad,” I said, through gritted teeth. “Still single.”

My mom's good friend, Cynthia, decided to speak up. She was a nice enough lady, but didn't seem to have the mental filter, the one that separated her brain from her mouth, that most people did. She said whatever was on her mind and lacked a little thing called 'tact.'. She was a top member of the Ladies' Bridge Club.

“When are you going to have a kid, Hannah?” Cynthia asked, pushing her sunglasses up on top of her head to get a better look at me. “You know, time waits for no one.”

“Thanks, Cynthia,” I said, with a bit of sarcasm. I was now regretting my choice of seating. I would have been better sitting next to Abigail.

The worst part wasn't that she asked the question. Is was that she felt the need to ask it in front of everybody and put me on the spot. I'd already felt embarrassed enough by my dad doing it, but Cynthia's question was even worse.

“I just haven't met the right guy yet,” I said, shrugging my shoulders. “That's all.”

Cynthia stared at me for a moment too long and I could tell she was judging me. She didn't say anything else, though, and eventually went back to eating.

“Has anyone seen Katie?” Karina asked, changing the subject for me. “I thought she'd be here.”

Finally, after what felt like an agonizing eternity, Cynthia answered.

“No, she's working at the bakery today. She's got her baking competitions coming up so she'd been practicing like crazy.”

“That's too bad,” my mother replied. “I always like having her here. I am excited about her being on that baking show, though. It's going to be so exciting to have someone from our town doing something amazing.”

Everyone began talking about Katie's new baking TV appearance, and I was just grateful that the attention was no longer on me. I exhaled a sigh of relief and the blood finally drained from my cheeks. I didn't mind being the center of attention, but I didn't want it to be because I didn't have kids.

Karina leaned toward me, whispering in my ear. “Just ignore them, Hannah. You know how it is in this town. People think you're from another planet if you're not married with children by the age of twenty.”

I nodded in agreement. “Yeah, no kidding.”

I'm starting to wonder myself if I'm from another planet, though, I thought. I sure do feel like it sometimes. Maybe an alien from my home planet will come down and deliver me a kid if I pray hard enough.

I ate the rest of my meal without saying much. The food was amazing and the company was good, I just wasn't in the mood for small talk any more. As I dove into my pulled pork, I gazed over toward the kid's table. There were at least ten children there and two of them were having a food fight. They were laughing as they flicked potato salad at each other using their plastic forks. Seeing it made me smile.

As much as I hated to admit it, Cynthia had been right when she said that time waits for no one. Time was passing and it was passing quickly. My body wouldn't be thirty-something years old forever and the longer I waited to have kids, the less likely it was going to happen.

I looked over at my dad as he laughed at something my mother said. It wouldn't matter how soon I had kids, though. My dad wouldn't get the chance to meet them. I'd have to get pregnant in the next few weeks just to have a chance, and the odds of that were beyond minuscule. I knew I couldn't adopt that fast either. Especially not as a single woman.

My thoughts were temporarily distracted when I heard the kids at the picnic table yell out with glee. They all shouted the same name with the kind of excitement that a child would have on Christmas morning.

“Dr. Matthews is here!” they called out. “Dr. Matthews is here!”