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Flashback 3
Terakhir Diperbarui:
2020-12-29 11:54:20It's been a couple of weeks since I’ve been hanging out with Chris and I honestly was enjoying that time alone with him. He’s different from the other guys in the class and he never cared what people had to say to him. It was like he decided on the people he wanted to talk to and would tell people the honest truth even if it was something that they would dislike. It took me a while to open up to him, but in time it was easy to talk around him knowing that he wouldn't judge too or dwell on certain matters. The only thing I didn’t like about him was his stubborn personality; he’ll get mad and sometimes gets into fights with the other students. He’ll warn me about the people I have to be careful with. He had a few enemies so during lunch we’ll spend our time together in case they’ll bully with me and the possibility of getting hurt.
“If they ever talk to you, I’ll fucking kick there ass.” he would say. “You have t
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Don't Touch Flashback 4
The bell rang, students walking to their desks and he finally turned away leaving me to focus on my classwork. After a while, Chris fell asleep a few times during the day and I would glance over at him still wondering about my feelings towards Chris. But he’s become so obvious that he would catch me off guard like when he brushed his fingers over my arms or lean a little closer to me when he had the chance and I didn’t know how to react. No one has ever touched me this way before and I’d blush from his attention. The day felt so long until the final bell rang and I was making my way out of calls wanting to go home now.While walking out of the school, Chris spotted me so I waited for him so we could walk together when he wrapped his arms around me and I almost pulled away. There was still a group of students making their way out that I wasn’t too sure if we should be seen in a romantic way. I think I was still scared of being messed with as the kids di
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2021-01-02Don't Touch Flashback 5
I shouldn’t feel guilty that I lied, but I felt like Chris wouldn't have agreed to let Caesar join us or even wanted to talk with him if he joined us. I saw Caesar at the front of the school like I asked and waved at him once he saw me. We walked for a while and it was honestly a nice change talking with someone that has a few things in common and that kept our conversation going until it was time to go our separate ways. I waved at him walking towards the direction of my house before someone had reached out to grab my backpack from behind me and caused me to fall back hitting the ground.I looked up and saw Chris behind me. “What? Where-”“You fucking lied,” he said as he reached out to grab the collar of my shirt and pulled me up.“No. It is not like that.”“How the fuck is it then?” he said as he pushed me against a fence and I felt my chest tighten as I looked up at him.“I knew you wo
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2021-03-04Don't Touch Flashback 6
The fear rose inside me so I tried to move away from me and I accidentally fell to the floor hurting my wrist when I tried to catch myself. Chris was breathing heavily as he looked down at me before reaching for my arm and I slapped his hand away as I couldn’t look at him.He looked around before reaching out again picking me up. “I’m sorry.” He said as he began to clean my pants.“Don’t,” I mumbled, slapping his hands away and I fixed myself.He left me alone for a long minute before turning to me again. “I’m sorry. I just got really angry and I didn’t mean all that.” He said as he reached out to hold my hand. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”I didn’t say anything but I slowly pulled my hand away.“Come on. We both said a lot of things we didn’t mean.” He said as he pulled me close kissing my cheek from where he hit me. “I’m sorry.&r
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2021-03-04Don't Touch Chapter 29
I watched her leave soon after I washed the rest of the dishes then put away anything that was left out on the table. I went back to my room once I was done and laid there playing on my phone passing the time until I had to get ready for this date. I began to clean my room after I got dressed because I was already nervous to go out and there was still an hour before Elliot came to pick me up. I sat there on my bed as I played around with the rubber band around my wrist and it felt like I haven’t done this in a while. I looked down at my wrist before taking a deep breath knowing that there wasn’t anything for me to be worried about. I made my way outside once it was time and made sure the door was locked behind me when I saw Elliot pulling up.“Hey.” He said, smiling.“Hi,” I said as I put on my seat belt after I got in.“You okay?” He asked.“Yeah, I’m just curious about what we’ll be doing
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2021-03-06Don't Touch Chapter 30
Elliot finally went underwater and I watched him from where I sat by the edge. I started thinking back to when I first met Elliot barely two months ago and the school year is close to ending in three months. Maybe Elliot was right about me being different than who I was before when I started school and yet I still don’t see much of a difference in me. I looked at my hands as I reached out to touch the water and wondered when was the last time I'd been disgusted by someone touching me. Luis hugged me yesterday and I didn’t think much of it or Elliot when he held my hand. Maybe I’m not completely cured, but could I finally be better now that I don’t have to be afraid? Did I just not have to think about it when people reach out to me?“Michael.”I looked up and saw Elliot kneeling right in front of me.“I was calling you.” He said.“Sorry,” I said shaking my head a bit to clear my thoughts. “I
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2021-03-08Don't Touch Chapter 31
“Every time people touch me, all I can see is me in my room,” I said as my voice grew louder and I moved a bit away from him. “I can’t breathe. I can't move. I don’t want to feel anything because when I do I always get hurt in the end. And I’m tired of it. I’m tired of this pain. Why won't it just stop?”Elliot was looking at me as he covered his mouth and he didn’t have anything to say. He reached out trying to pull me into his arms and I tried to move away, but we had a scuffle until I gave up and I just felt his arm wrapped around me. I ended up crying against his chest and I don’t know how long we sat there or cared if people saw us, but I just felt exhausted after saying all that to him. Mentally or physically… I’m not sure anymore. Maybe this was all that emotion that I’ve kept to myself and I never wanted to express.“Please… please, don’t ever say you can’t,&
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2021-03-08Don't Touch Chapter 32
I sighed as I leaned back against the headboard. “And about what I said…”“Don’t. If you're going to give me an excuse about what you said then I’ll be mad. I think you said what you said because… you wanted someone to hear you.” He said cutting me off and I tugged a little at the bottom of my shirt. “You can’t take back what you said.”I nodded my head as I looked back at him, “Okay.”“Alright… now let’s get ready.” He said standing up before turning back to me. “You don’t happen to have a spare toothbrush, do you?”I smiled. “Yeah,” I said getting up and going to the restroom to grab it. “Where exactly are we going this time?”Elliot took the toothbrush and walked over to the bathroom sink. “Um, I don’t know.” He said as he started brushing his teeth.“I thought you alway
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2021-03-09Don't Touch Chapter 33
He started walking to look for a machine to grab change to play the arcade games and looked around figuring out which game to play first. I tried not to think about the people walking around us and I made sure there was enough space between as I walked around trying to let them pass by first. Once deciding on a game of air hockey and it took me a while to get into the game, but the time I did Elliot was able to win me by scoring seven to two. We played another round and it wasn’t so bad this time since it was helping me focus on the game, not the people around us, but Elliot still won in the end. I didn’t mind losing because I’m not used to spending my time in these kinds of environments and I never had the chance to play a game of air hockey or any of the other arcade games.I tried to enjoy myself hoping to not show that he’s made a mistake on bringing me here since he had good intentions. When we find something else to do, I try not to think about e
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2021-03-11
Bab terbaru
Don't Touch Chapter 18 [4-4]
We spent some time holding onto each other until it started to feel cold now that the sun was going down and the wind got a little stronger. I put on my shoes and then helped Elliot clean the blanket before making our way to the car. Elliot was asking what I would be interested in eating, maybe trying to help me be in the mood to have something filling, but I wasn’t too sure how much I could intake. I agreed with something as simple as pizza and we took it home, where my mom was waiting for us. There was this awkward silence around the table; I felt like Elliot wanted to talk with my mom and report about our day, always privately counseling her. I was barely able to finish two slices before putting my plate in the sink and I gave them their time as I excused myself to change my clothes. I washed my feet since it was dirty from stepping on the wet sand and when I came back to my room, Elliot was lying down on my bed. I didn't say anything as I grabbed a new pair of socks and moved to
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“Michael?” Elliot asked, wanting me to reply to his statement.“I’m listening,” I whispered, turning to look at him and thinking more about his words.“I don’t want you to be upset with yourself or to have any guilty conscience. It was just… I’m trying to inform you that this is also substance abuse or could even lead to it and you’ve used both alcohol and drugs in the past. This is aside from the fact that your friends pressured you to drink, if they continue with this, then you will blindly harm yourself in the long run. I’m actually surprised that you didn’t have that thought and it’s concerning.” Elliot tells me and it felt me speechless.I looked up at the sky and noticed the sun was beginning to set. “Can we not talk about this anymore?” I asked him.“I’m only telling you from the way I view it and I care about you. I don’t know how much you’ve explained to Doctor Brown about the situation, but with your reaction, it seemed like this is something that you haven’t made yourself a
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We both didn’t say anything as Elliot kept his focus on the road and I kept my eyes out the window seeing the view change. I always enjoy seeing the beach view and maybe being out would be a nice breather like he suggested. It took a bit of time for Elliot to find parking and we made our way over to an area that was less crowded. Now that we’re near summer, it was a nice day to be at the beach and it wasn’t so hot that I had to take off my sweater. As always, Elliot took out a blanket from the trunk of his car like he’s always prepared and we laid it out after we found a nice spot away from the pier. It felt like we were the only people on the beach, giving me this secure feeling.“Are you sure that you’re not hungry?” Elliot asked after noticing the time. “I’ll eat after we are done here,” I said while looking over the ocean view and seeing the water shining from the sunlight.“But you like to stay here for hours,” Elliot retorts and tilts his head to look at me closer.I shrugged m
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I sat up suddenly and felt my hands shaking, knowing I’d woken up from another nightmare. Why was this one real compared to the other one I had? Why did I remember something from the past that I was able to forget? No, I’m going to forget about it again like it never happened. I don’t want more memories from the past to resurface and affect me like before. It took me a moment to remember that I was in my bedroom and I reached a hand out to the spot beside me. I didn’t feel Elliot's hand and looked over to see his side of the bed empty. I tried to stay calm as I looked around my room trying to figure out if he had left while I was sleeping, but that wouldn’t be something that Elliot would do. “Elliot?” I called out in a small voice. Did he go home? No, he said that he was going to stay for a while and wasn’t going to leave without telling me. I tried not to feel overwhelmed as I pulled the covers off and checked the restroom, hoping he was in there. I stepped out to the hallway, hear
Don't Touch Chapter 17 [3-3]
For a second, I wondered if we shouldn’t be holding each other like this, but does this mean that he still cares for me, or is he only being kind? If we had been like this before I fell asleep, I might not have had that dream. The thought about the dream had me shivering as I recall Chris’s face and I moved a bit away from Elliot, but he still had me in his arms. He must have noticed my discomfort and I felt his hands patting my back, trying to comfort me. I’m starting to feel a bit of pain in the pit of my stomach and I know it’s all the stress from having the panic attacks to the night terror. “I’m tired,” I mumbled as I closed my eyes, feeling exhausted again. “You’re going to be tired the whole day if you don’t rest,” Elliot replied. “I know… I’m already getting a stomach ache,” I said, then sighed, feeling a little pain. “And I was feeling that earlier at my dad’s house.” “Do you need some medicine?” He asked me. “I think so,” I said, sitting up. “Stay here. I’ll get it for
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I closed my eyes, trying to get comfortable, and it felt easier to fall asleep with Elliot beside me. At least I know he is here supportively and he chose to stay the night because he wanted to; not just to watch over me out of spite. Even if he was here to comfort me and nothing more, I’m thankful he let me lean on him, even if it’s only for tonight. I opened my eyes, wanting a little peek, and he looked like he was already sound asleep; maybe he was already tired before coming to pick me up. There was something I wanted to ask him about our relationship, but I was also afraid to hear the answer, or I was only hoping for an answer that I wanted to hear. I turned over, away from him, and closed my eyes, knowing I was only trying to distract myself from sleeping. For a while, I could hear the soft breathing coming from Elliot, and hearing him was a nice reminder that I wasn’t alone. A sudden flashing light disturbed me and I raised a hand trying to block it; maybe I left the blinds op
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Chapter 17When we entered the house, I went to the kitchen and decided I needed my anxiety pill. “Do you want something to drink?” I asked him.“Water is fine,” He answered.I grabbed two bottles of water and handed them to him as we moved to sit on the couch. “You really don’t mind staying?” I asked him.Elliot took the bottle of water and had a small sip, “I don’t mind.”I moved to lean against the armrest and face him as we sat on the long couch. “Before I called you, I was in the guest room trying to relax but I was going through both panic attacks and anxiety,” I told him while looking down at the bottle of water. “All those feelings came to me that I began to doubt myself... Every time I see Chris, alarm bells go off in my head and my body yells that I need to leave. Runaway, hide, or find a way to disappear.”Elliot reached out to hold my wrist and the touch grabbed my attention, “And now your home, far away from him. Remember that he’s not going to hurt you here.”“Come on, E
Don't Touch Chapter 16 [4-4]
I looked into the living room, and I saw Ally on the ground playing with her toys while Caesar sat beside her, looking down at his phone. “When did she wake up?” I asked.He looked up and put his phone away, “About ten minutes ago… You look worse.”I moved to sit on the floor with them and Ally crawled over to me. “I called Elliot and he’s going to come by,” I told him and put Ally on my lap with her stuffed bear. “Is it okay if you wait until he gets here?”“Yeah,” He nodded as he reached into his pocket and handed me a paper. “They want you to call this number and you can tell them what happened. It’s Chris’s probation officer and they said that he will get a fine after breaking his restraining order.”I looked down at the paper, “A fine? That’s it?” I asked him.“Since he didn’t do anything, there isn’t much they can do besides that, and if he had done something, they could have him in jail for over six months,” Caesar said, leaning back to rest against the couch.“But that sounds
Don't Touch Chapter 16 [3-4]
It was quiet on the walk back to my house and Caesar laid Ally down on her crib after I showed him the way to the bedroom. I was able to calm down a bit, but my hands were still shakey and I knew that this anxious feeling wouldn’t go away. I watched as Caesar closed the door behind him and rubbed my arm nervously, taking the lead back downstairs. I led him to the kitchen to grab a cup of water and took a small sip while Caesar stood behind me, leaning against the counter. It's my fault for being careless and going out when I’ve already been warned that he’s back in town. What would have happened if I was alone or if Caesar didn’t show up at the right time?“Thanks for helping me,” I whispered.“Well, it wasn’t like he could do much without having to put himself in jail and I’m not sure how you would have been if he stayed longer.” He said and looked me over like he was being cautious with his words. “You should be careful having these panic attacks while holding your sister… It looked
