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Chapter 98 : Restrains
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Dispute Marriage: No Terms and Conditions Chapter 99 : Hug me
SamuelMeanwhile, I realize Mom is standing a few yards away, next to the entrance, smiling at us. I look down. As though a lump is stuck inside of my throat, I find it hard to swallow. Mom comes towards us and sits next to me. She says nothing, just spending the next few minutes caressing my hair and cheeks. And throughout the moment, I can't make myself look at her. "I couldn't even ask you how you have been doing. It didn't seem right that moment", she says as I nod."You did right", I mutter. "Where have you been?" she exclaims, still caressing my hair. "Not anywhere to be specific", I stutter, clasping my hands together. "We had been trying to locate you for the last three weeks", Dad says. "I didn't want to be anywhere you all could find me. I was travelling in subways", my voice is stern."For three weeks?" Mom blurts out in disbelief. I nod. "A few days ago, I landed in Boston. Then I had to use my card in the lodge. Eric tried to find it out""We stopped tracking your c
Dispute Marriage: No Terms and Conditions Chapter 100 : Initial days
Chrisanna"You can walk by yourself after a week", Samuel says as he settles me on the mattress and begins to take my sandals off. My lips widen into a light smile as I wonder if I made the right decision by keeping him with me. He's gonna give ten times extra effort than it needs. I fear I'm gonna drain him. Why didn't it click my head when Paa was refusing to let me go with Samuel? However, either way, it would hurt Samuel. We're now at my parents' place. Obviously, Paa didn't want to give my entire responsibility to Samuel. It hurts so much to see how drastically things have changed. My father trusted Samuel the most in this whole world with me and now he doesn't even want to leave me completely alone with him. He fears Samuel is gonna leave me alone again. I was completely under Pa's concern but at the same time, I was adamant.There was a mini-war in the hospital when I told this to him. For the first time in my life, I fought with Paa. For the first time, I didn't blindly acce
Dispute Marriage: No Terms and Conditions Chapter 101 : Month—One
ChrisannaI'm officially in the most painful stage of my life where every second of breathing is painful. As days keep passing, I feel the pain taking over all other emotions. I'm on medicines— 3 times daily— weekly check, therapy, and draining energy. It's so painful sometimes that I can't even react in front of others. I feel embarrassed — some days, I feel like shit. Samuel left his position in the company to give his entire focus to me. But he still works sometimes from home as Uncle Kane is handling all his projects and needs his help most of the time. Paa is around most of the time— checking on me and taking me for checkups once in a while. Mama has taken a break too and gradually I'm starting to feel awful.It seems like they all have changed their lives completely because of me. It stings to see my parents go through the same pain again. If Samuel wasn't there, I know both of them would be stuck to me like they were years back. And Samuel— I don't even know when was the la
Dispute Marriage: No Terms and Conditions Chapter 102 : Month—One (2)
SamuelI wasn't honestly expecting something like that. There's barely any word I can form to speak when she stares straight into my eyes with a blank face. Her voice barely shakes and her gaze doesn't even flinch.This is not anything like Chrisanna. Chrisanna is all about expressing. She doesn't believe in being or looking emotionless— cold and rough. She should have been nervous, scared, or hurt while saying such a huge thing to me. At least— to me!I had seen changes in her behaviour lately but it's something painful to watch.She keeps staring at me, waiting for an answer when I was completely spaced out. I shrug, clearing my throat."Okay""It's awful", she doesn't blink— and her voice is ice cold. She should be flinching and groaning in frustration and maybe in anger. There's nothing!"It's not awful", I exclaim, immediately sliding my palm around her jaw. "It's a way to heal you""Yeah. Just throwing away a part of my body isn't awful", she groans, making me unsettled."No.
Dispute Marriage: No Terms and Conditions Chapter 103 : Month–Two
ChrisannaNo amount of willpower, confidence, and support can prepare you for this— no matter how strong you try to be— it's never that easy. The day I was diagnosed with this disease again, I was so sure that I would overcome it— again. If a seven-year-old child can fight, then a twenty-five-year-old grown-ass woman can definitely fight and win. But little did I know that, it's not the same— and never that easy.The more I was sucked into this illness, the more I realized it's not the same. It's more painful than anything else. Either I lose something that defines my identity, or I lose myself. Either way, I have to lose. Spacing out of reality, I look down at my hands, clasping and unclasping them as my eyes dart to the wedding ring, glistening on my finger. My thoughts slip away from one direction to the other one as Samuel's face flashes in front of my eyes. I haven't seen him for two days— ever since I was admitted to the hospital for surgery. I met no one as I requested them
Dispute Marriage: No Terms and Conditions Chapter 104 : Month—Two (2)
SamuelChrisanna had to spend the next week in the hospital. As she preferred, Aunty Ivanna was there for her most of the time. I rarely got to spend time with her as the nurses and doctors had to check on her every half an hour. She might need a few weeks to recover from the surgery before the radiation therapy starts. According to the doctors, she'll need more than a year to get past all that and it depends on her recovery whether she'd need more therapy or not. However, I'm more concerned about the woman she's turning into— completely different from what she was. She barely speaks to me. She just stares at me whenever I am there as if she's talking to me through her eyes and I feel dumb and desperate when I can't bring myself to understand what she might want to say.I try to be there for her as much as I can but I wish I could do more. To ensure I'm in a better state of mind, I regularly attend my therapy sessions. Connor introduced me to a group and I have attended two meetings
Dispute Marriage: No Terms and Conditions Chapter 105 : Month—Five
Chrisanna Stage III. As hard as it is to accept, this is the reality. It's been weeks since I've been back to the hospital. Again.And it sucks. I'm going through radiation therapy now. Even though my breasts were removed, cancer spread beyond that area to nearby lymph nodes surrounding tissues, chest walls, and skin.My skin burns, itches, and aches most of the time. I feel tired even pushing my eyelids and sometimes it's even harder to breathe. Although my stitches are gone, leaving those lifelong scars, the soreness and fatigue still wake me up every night. But now I have learned not to cry out. I have learned how to live with this discomfort and pain. Among everything, my life is just standing still. It seems like I'm stuck in a loophole where the world is running at a fast pace and I'm just standing there. I don't feel the same anymore. I'm not the same. The changes haunt me. I find it hard to accept myself. And every time I try to speak my heart out, I can't. They don't
Dispute Marriage: No Terms and Conditions Chapter 106 : Month Five : The celebration
ChrisannaThe sun-kissed park provides a picturesque setting as the sprawling green meadow unfolds in front of me. Towering trees with long branches surrounding us leaves gently rustling in the soft breeze. The vibrant colours of blooming flowers dot the landscape.I inhale deeply, swallowing the canvas before my eyes. It all seems so new and mesmerising. I haven't inhaled fresh air for months. More than half of the last five months were spent within the four walls of the hospital and I also didn't wanna step out.I miss my old life so much. I look yards away, taking every inch of the view, watching kids playing around, families conversing and groups of friends laughing aloud."It's really hot over here", Samuel comes beside me, blocking the sun rays straight hitting my face as how tall he is. I look up at him and smile, finding Zoey curled around his neck. "I missed this heat""In that case, I think you had enough of it", he slides his hand behind my back and I keep smiling at Zoey
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