CHAPTER NINE

Matthew looks at me, confused. "I'm not sure I understand," he says.

"Just wait until we get back to the pack," I say. "Then we can talk."

He shrugs and nods. "Okay," he says.

"We need to keep running," I say. "The people who were after us back at the outpost will probably send a search party to look for us."

He nods.

We run through the forest together. It's a beautiful night. The full moon is high in the sky, lighting our path in a silvery glow.

"This way," I say, gesturing towards a stream. At the edge of the stream, there is a small boat.

I walk over to it. It's one of the boats from the resistance outpost. It's probably their backup boat.

Matthew and I step into the boat, and I row us across the stream and into the main lake. As we cross, Matthew and I don't say anything. We sit in silence, listening to the sounds of the night. We listen to the wind in the trees and the sounds of birds calling to each other. There's something about finally coming back here after thinking we'd never be able to that makes it feel like we're seeing the world for the first time.

When the boat bumps the shore, I jump out and pull the boat onto the bank. We walk up an overgrown path.

I used to come here with my dad when I was young. We used to fish and explore together. It was the closest I ever used to get to him. I am struck, suddenly, by just how much I miss him. But also how good it feels to finally be almost home.

"This way," I say.

We walk down an overgrown path, and soon we find the entrance to the caves. It's a small tunnel that once led down to the resistance outpost. When my dad was alive, the outpost was hidden behind a wall of trees. Now the forest has grown back, and the entrance to the caves is almost completely hidden.

I point my flashlight at the ground. The way the beam of light bounces around the walls is almost like a strobe light in the dark cave.

We walk through the tunnel, and I can hear water dripping in the distance. There is a puddle of water in front of us.

We walk through it, and as soon as we're on the other side, our feet squish in the mud. There's a narrow path through the forest. I hold my flashlight out in front of me and we walk through the inky darkness.

"I don't want to be a wet mess by the time I get back to the pack."

"Fair," he says. "I've never come this way before. Are we close?"

"Very," I say. "We should be there within the hour."

We follow the path for about 20 minutes, and it gets a little easier to see because the trees thin out and the moon is higher in the sky.

As we walk, it hits me how beautiful the night is. It's beautiful and peaceful, and I think this might be my favorite time of day.

The air is crisp and cool, but it's also warm.

We walk through the woods, and all of a sudden, Matthew stops. Up ahead, I can see that we're coming to a clearing. The trees thin out and the moonlight streams in. We're here.

Matthew stops unexpectedly.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

"I just-- I didn't think I'd ever make it back here again," he says.

"But you did."

"I wouldn't have-- not with you," he says, and he smiles at me.

"You ready to go see everyone?" I ask. "I know they'll be thrilled to have you back."

I can only hope the same thing can be said for me. I know bringing back Matthew is a win, but I'm still not sure it will be enough. Leaving the pack is a serious offense-- one that comes with serious consequences.

I'm afraid they'll hate me. I'm afraid they'll shun me. But I suppose I'll never really know unless I try.

"I'm ready," Matthew says. I can see him trying to steady his nerves as he walks up to the camp.

I can see a large bonfire in the distance. The bonfire casts a flickering amber glow over the camp and the cabins. There's a circle of people around it-- sitting and talking and laughing. I hear laughter and soft music. It's a lively evening-- one of the last evenings we'll have before winter comes.

I walk into the camp and in the distance I see my mother. I see her sitting at a table with a couple people I don't recognize. They look like they're having the time of their lives. They are drinking wine and eating crackers, and I find I'm a bit hurt to see how happy she is without me. I haven't been gone that long, but a part of me feels like she's already moved on.

Across the camp, I see a group of people sitting around a fire. There's a guitar next to them. Someone scoops it up, and soon the sound of a guitar being played begins to permeate the camp.

Lucas played guitar. He wrote me a song when we first met. It was the moment I fell in love with him.

I push the memory aside. I can't afford to think about him now. Or ever. Lucas is my past, but the pack-- the pack is my future. Or, at least, I hope they are. I have to convince them to forgive me first.

I take a deep breath and start to walk over to my mother. I am so nervous I feel like I might throw up.

I am just about to summon the courage to interrupt her conversation when he I hear footsteps behind me. My heart sinks. Instinctively, I know something is about to happen, and whatever it is, it isn't good.

I turn around to find Dean standing there, staring at me, a snarl on his face.