Chapter 0001

Kaia POV

My own mate rejected me on our wedding night. As soon as I signed the marriage certificate and prepared to consummate our new life together...he rejected me.

“I, Than Sable, Alpha of the Amber Desert Pack, reject you Kaia Glace as my Luna.” I remember his cruel cutting words as if they were only yesterday. But they weren’t, his rejection of our mate bond was two years ago.

The words still resound in my ears even after all this time.

Time, I have wasted being a semi-Luna. Time wasted with a mate that doesn’t even want me.

Than and I met at college. The noisy corridors of college seem like a lifetime ago now, so does the Than I knew back then. As soon as we returned to the Amber Desert Pack, he took on his position as the Alpha. I happily followed to become his Luna, as his mate.

The caring and supportive Than I knew at college changed instantly as soon as we were married. He rejected me even before our wedding night, even before marking me.

I’ve gone over and over again in my head what I must have said, what I did wrong, but each time I came up empty. Every time I asked him, I would get a grunt or an inaudible murmur, so I stopped asking.

His complete reversal in character makes me feel as if I imagined our college days, as if they didn’t even exist and I was living in a dream world.

An illusion.

Our mate bond is non-existent. That’s a lie, it exists but he doesn’t allow himself to get close to me, doesn’t allow himself to be alone in a room with me. It’s as if I disgust him. That it pains him to get close to me.

I hate our mate bond. The very thing that makes my heart flutter as he enters a room, or the scent of roasted chestnuts that lingers on the furniture.

Even his auburn shaded hair, muscular alpha body and hazel eyes I have come to hate. I hate the way the mate bond tricks me every day.

For an entire year after our wedding there was hardly a time that I saw Than, especially alone. He became exceedingly busy with pack affairs and used it as an excuse to stay away from me.

I tried to solve the issue I may have caused, to save our marriage. I must have done something wrong...

But when I found out what the real problem in our marriage was, I stopped trying. I gave up...because it was just too insurmountable.

So, for the last year I’ve remained quiet in the house he has assigned to me.

In all honesty, I’ve grown tired of the life I lead, this wasn’t the life I imagined for myself.

I tried to communicate with Than. I tried to put across my case to leave the Amber Desert pack, but he always said that there was still time.

I’m not sure what kind of measure of time he was referring to, but I felt out of time.

Anyway, it turned out that I was his "Luna", but in reality, I was his imprisoned canary.

However, I never gave up and ran, because I felt that my life should not be like this, and besides, I also had my own things that needed to be resolved.

“Kaia?” His growl reaches my ears as I sit in my bedroom, an internal sigh escaping me for his disturbance.

I walk out of my bedroom and downstairs, at first thinking I imagined his voice. Because why would he be here?

But his lingering scent was the key detail of him actually being here.

I walk into my living area to find him standing, his back to me. I can feel the chemical reaction of the mate bond trying to encourage me to touch him, to give into that gravitational pull to once again experience those tingles that only a mate can give.

I resist.

“What are you doing here?” He never visits me, why now.

“This is my pack, I can go wherever I want.” His voice holds an irritation to it.

He has clearly been in night training; he is sweaty and dirty...his white tight vest now tingeing on the grey side, his jeans muddy from being left on the ground. His auburn hair now shaved down, not the long boyish strands I used to enjoy running my fingers through.

He spins, his eyes turning a deeper brown as they flash at me...I’m only wearing a black slip. I thought I’d be alone as usual, no point dressing up for oneself.

“Than, why are you here?”

“I’ve incurred a slight problem...”

“A slight problem? And I can help how?”

He doesn’t respond to me, but he finds himself comfortable enough to walk into my kitchen and fetch my bottle of vodka. By the smell reaching my nostrils, he’s already downed a bottle of whiskey this night. I won’t talk to him like this, he can walk himself out.

I head up the stairs, towards my bedroom when I hear his footsteps following me up the stairs. I turn to face him on the landing, his peculiar behaviour piquing my interest.

His hand pulls at my arm, pulling me into him, his lips taking me off guard as they almost touch mine. “It would seem I need to have a child...” His voice is cold...holding some kind of resentment.

“A child?” I hide my scoff internally, as my wolf growls in my mind. She hates him, hates him for rejecting us.

His eyes are on me now for my disrespectful comment. His aura increasing, an invisible command trying to force me to submit.

He’s always struggled to make me submit and it gives me deep joy to know how much that grates on him.

He doesn’t know why.

“Can I ask why now? Where has this come from? Let’s not pretend that you have any feelings for me Than. Why bring a child up in this unloving and toxic environment?” I untangle myself from his hold and create some much-needed distance between us.

“The pack needs an heir; you are the Luna after all.”

He does what I was praying to the moon goddess for him not to do, he starts walking towards me. His prowling steps resulting in my spine to shiver.

This man was your typical alpha...tall, muscles, predatory eyes to help seal the deal...but it’s the inside that sickens me.

Yet there’s as part of me that hopes I have it wrong, that there has been some kind of misunderstanding between us since the wedding...because why would we be matched together?

As he comes closer his scent tickles at my senses, the roasted chestnut smell now mixed with heavy alcohol.

He’s in front of me before I can do anything, his hand stroking at my face. A deep gulp forming in his throat, as if it pains him to touch me.

As soon as his fingers are on me, I want to moan with pleasure from his touch, from the tingles that I hadn’t felt in so long.

I’m entranced by the tingles that just naturally continue, as his mouth kisses the tip of my shoulder. He pulls at my black spaghetti slip strap, running his tongue across the skin.

A guttural moan escapes me as my head rolls back. I push my wolf away, was it selfish of me to enjoy what was owed to me? What was destined to me?

“It’s just a child Kaia...” He slurs on his own words as his hand grips at my neck, his hand angling my neck...a growl rumbling in his chest.

Just a child? How can he say that?

The mate bond was already weaving its magic. His closeness was doing things to me, his scent overpowering my thought process. I hated how the mate bond reduced me to this.

“Say yes...” His lips are by my ear and I have to bite down on my tongue to keep my moans in check.

My body is lost in the lustful feel of his touch at my lower core as his free hand lifts under my hem and pushes my panties aside. His other hand remains at my neck, keeping me upright as his thumb now creates circular motions at my clit.

Would a child make him love me again? Would a child bring us closer?

I don’t think so, how could I knowingly bring a child into a relationship where the father can’t be in the same room as the mother.

“No!” I gasp out, my body now fighting against the mate bond. Waking up from its spell.

“No?” He seethes in my ear, his hand tightening around my neck.

“No, I said no.” I snarl at him, the tightness around my throat now hurting.

I start to push on his chest, but he is built like a brick wall. He doesn’t listen to my rejection, his hand continuing down below.

“Get your hands off me...” I snarl at him, my teeth close enough to his face to bite.

His jaw tense, as his eyes glare at me.

*trigger warning*

He pushes me back into my bedroom where the back of my legs hit against the bed. I lift my leg to kick him where it hurts, to snap him out of his lustful haze. But he blocks my knee with his, pushing my legs apart.

Still holding onto my throat, he pushes us onto the edge of the bed where I am locked in his hold, using all my strength to fight it.

His other hand is now blocking my punches and clawing attempts, before I feel him grip tightly onto my hip. I hear him unzip his jeans, the denim dropping to the floor.

Before I know it, he thrusts into me, too hard. I can feel myself burning inside as he overstretches me.

Something inside of me freezes, telling me that I want this child...the treacherous mate bond trying to convince me even now.

Tears are flowing down my face as I struggle with his harsh thrusts.

I’m pinned, not making any movement at all. His hand now off my neck and both pinning my body down.

I can’t look at him, my eyes are slammed shut, I know I’ll relive this...I want the memory already gone.

I’m not sure what the measure of time is but it feels like an eternity before I feel him chasing his own release.

“Alora...” He lowly growls as I feel him climax, his seed spilling into me.

Tears escape me as I lay still. As he releases his tight hold on me, my hands clamp over my mouth to keep my sobs silent.

Alora.

She was the reason my marriage was a fake.

She was my marital nightmare.