"I give up on loving you."

Asha Smith:

I have always been an independent woman, full of dreams and ambitions. But, for some reason, I ended up halting my studies to enter into one of those contractual marriages where love seemed to be absent, and money and status were the only concerns.

Since the day I said "yes," my life has turned into a monotonous and solitary routine. My husband, Allan, hardly ever lived at home. He was always busy with his business, leaving me at the mercy of the rules we had signed in the contract. The marriage was not an emotional bond but rather a cold and calculated transaction.

Allan had a specific clause in our contract that gave me majority control of his company if he ever cheated on me, and the same applied to me. He thought that with this clause, I would be trapped at home, afraid to break our agreement. But what he didn't know was that I was not a typical submissive housewife.

On that day, I was returning from shopping, carrying bags filled with groceries and the facade of a marriage built on appearances. The atmosphere was tense, and I could feel that something was wrong. When I entered the house, the feeling that something was amiss only intensified.

I cautiously climbed the stairs, hearing muffled laughter coming from the master bedroom. My heart raced when I opened the bedroom door and came face-to-face with the worst possible scene: the bed he had never wanted to use with me, he was using it with her. My husband was entangled with "my colleague," and my blood boiled as I hurled the bags near them.

A whirlwind of emotions overcame me. I could feel anger burning inside me, but I also felt determined not to be used as a pawn in a power game. I remembered the contract clause instantly, the one that gave me control of the company's shares if he cheated on me. It was my chance to reclaim my independence and dignity, lost when my grandfather forced me into this marriage.

I grabbed my phone and started filming; it was my proof. Allan then moved closer to take my phone, but I evaded him and tried to push him away, albeit unsuccessfully.

— What's this? Are you trying to act tough? Have you lost your fear of me killing you? – I smirked at him; he thought of himself as an alpha male, an idiot!

He came closer to me, but I was already so furious that I delivered a blow to his midsection, and it seemed like that was the fatal blow for a man as big as him. I vividly remembered the one night we had been together; he was drunk, and it was the only time he had been affectionate with me. I had surrendered like a fool.

— You scoundrel! So, this is your reason for mistreating me? Now I understand the expensive gifts, while I live off crumbs, and you spend on any floozy.---

— Look at yourself, you see how you talk about me, — I was so angry... I wanted to kill her this time. Allan was recovering from my blow, so I took advantage and approached her. The bitch still tried to confront me, but I slapped her hard in the face.

— That's for you to learn, to have some morals. — She fell to the ground, and my husband came at me as if he were an ogre. But I grabbed a vase and threw it in his direction; he dodged it and said,

— You're not fit to be my wife. I don't want you because you've been with everyone, you're dirty. Get out of my house now. You're a terrible wife. —

— YOU'RE THE DIRTY ONE. I WANT A DIVORCE. I NEVER WANTED TO MARRY A PIECE OF CRAP LIKE YOU. — I spoke louder, irritated, and deeply hurt. How could I have loved a man like this? How could I have wanted to live with someone like this? I accepted my grandfather's deal, never dreaming of marrying by contract, but there were so many things at stake, and Allan needed a loan and a name... my grandfather passed away and left me this enormous burden. I hated that he accepted me as payment for his debt, and my grandfather had a heavy conscience and reputation.

He raised his hand to slap me, but quickly restrained himself... and left the room, pulling the woman with him. I followed the two of them and said,

— When you want to hit women, hit sluts like her, they accept and deserve it! —  Allan glared at me, I was full of resentment and hatred.

— GET OUT OF HERE. — He spoke gravely, trying to humiliate me. I felt like a fool for enduring so much from him and living in complete misery, accepting only breadcrumbs from him in an attempt to be a good wife or a compliant wife, and for what? For him to support someone else and cheat on me in his own home, it all makes sense now, and she even brought that bitch here to sleep several times, claiming she was working. My husband always rejected me, especially when she brought her "colleague" here. I no longer tried to get close to him... I no longer tried to be his friend. It had been three years, and we had been together two months ago, with him drunk. To this day, I feel like trash, but it was a memorable night for me, enough to say how much of a fool I am.

— This house is mine too, you should be the one to leave with this woman, — I retorted as he descended the stairs, also saying something that was impossible to hear.

— I want a divorce, and you're going to leave here, even if I have to drag you out. — He said angrily; I was ready for a fight. I stayed in the same place, and he spoke,

— I think you're underestimating me too much, don't bet on it, you ugly thing.--- He wasn't joking either, and his words were too rude. I didn't want to feel anything, but it was clear that I wasn't very appealing. Sometimes when I tried to dress up, he never showed up, he always disappeared, and she didn't have any more money to go to the salon or buy new clothes, since I didn't work, and he didn't give me anything, even though some of that money was mine.

— You're going to leave here, or I'm going to beat you. You won't take anything with you. I will live here with her as my love, with this woman who is cleaner than you. — I looked at that house, and honestly, I didn't want to live there anymore. Everything here was filthy; I had only had bad moments here. I had already lost all hope, and looking at that man on the lower floor with that woman at the moment, he wasn't for me, and he had already decided that, he had already decided not to see me as a woman, and I didn't want to live here, where I had been nothing more than a slave and a cleaner.

— So you think I'm going to give her to you like this and leave empty-handed, you're really shameless, I don't accept it. You can have the house, but we'll settle some terms. I really will leave here; this house is filthy. Tomorrow I'll come back with my lawyer! — I spoke determinedly, went down the stairs... looked him in the eyes, and decided that this would be the last time I would look at him with eyes of love after all the harm he had done to me and the disrespect he had shown me.