AnnaA light in the darkness. A small lit flame floats in the air.I should have known.I should have known ignoring the problem wouldn't make it go away. Alan was right. We can't run away from our problems. We have to be brave. I thought that's what I was doing when I went home last night and pulled out the letter I had originally ignored, the one that feels like a lifetime ago that I received.It was Jed's handwriting, I knew it would be, but somehow when I opened it, doubt dreaded my mind. The letter was the same as the others, facts about our past, secrets hidden all around the world. Everything I would need to put my father away. I put the letter into my safe hidden under the ground of my bedroom's closet, along with the pictures and all the other letters and I went to sleep.Now, as I stand here in my doorway, while the light, the burning orange and yellow light flickers, I wonder if I were meant to stare harder at the letters."Annabelle." The shadowy figure calls out.
Alan"Who can tell me the story of Romeo and Juliet?" I wait for the snickers to stop. I don't know what it is with kids and the story of Romeo and Juliet that have them snickering, laughing and blushing all at once. My previous class was the exact same way. I ask the question again once the class has settles down, and a girl raises her hand first."Yes, Merith."Merith lowers her hand and answers with a shy voice."Um, I think it's a love story. Romeo and Juliet love each other but their families don't like each other so they go behind their families backs and kiss." My lips turn up at her description.A few boys look at one another in the back corner with their mouths turned up in disgust. Ah, to be the age where you think all girls are absolutely discussing. Hard to believe in a few years those boys will be chasing these girls down instead."That's pretty accurate Merith. It's a tragic story derived from William Shakespeare." I begin telling the class the story of the doom
AnnaWhat was I doing? I was going to hurt him. I was going to destroy him, all by attempting to save him.Father wanted me closer to him, I became closer to him, but when he was telling me about going on a date, laughing along with me, joking with me like we used to when life was simple, when it was easy. I wanted him again and then the guilt hit hard."Oh, I didn't think you would be in the breakroom." Delilah says walking into the breakroom."Yeah, I remembered that you snort coke for a living and was wondering if I should break into your locker and steal some.""Ha-ha, what are you doing in here anyways?" She asks as she walks over to the Frappuccino machine.The breakroom is the same as the rest of Creations. Black and white, a sink, fridge, coffee machine, Frappuccino machine and a vending machine full of vegan items. As you can guess the vending machine is still full. There are a few benches and a couple of couches inside as well. I wanted my team to have somewhere
AlanThe week is finally over, and I think I am more excited than the kids. The final bell rings and the kids jump up out of their seats and run towards the exit. I normally keep them for a few seconds to finish up my last-minute thought and what their homework will be, but today is different. As soon as the last student leaves, Peter, I grab my briefcase and begin walking out of the room as well. I have a ton of work to grade and lots of prepping for Monday, but I want to get it all done today because this weekend will be jammed with just about everything under the sun.Dad called me last night, told me that Sunday was the day he has the meeting with the committee on the homeless project in downtown Manhattan. He is going to fly each of my sisters out to help with the day as well. Dad told me that on that day, not only will we meet with the committee members, but also go around to the shelters and see what we can do to help. With Christmas coming up and the weather out here gettin
AnnaThe drive is silent. It's something I'm immensely grateful for.Alan is your typical bad diver. Merges into different lanes, doesn't always see pedestrians and swerves like a bat out of hell. Living in New York and driving can be quiet challenging and for someone who was never that great of a driver, is even worse. But right now, Alan is being extra careful. I don't know if it's from my freak out earlier or that fact that he is on a non-date/date with me. Either way, I'm grateful.It takes us a solid half an hour to reach Maggie's. The large restaurant is crowded. Packed actually. This is the first time I have been here when it is open and on a weekend. Alan parks his car and gets out. I stay inside for a moment because I already know he wants to open my door. It's one thing I can't stand, it's one thing he loves to do. After the psychotic breakdown I gave him earlier, it's the least I can do."Anna?" I turn and see him extending his hand out to me. I must have been spaced
AlanEver wonder why alarm clocks are supposed to make the most annoying noise known to man? The question hits my mind this morning for about thirty seconds before I grabbed the damn thing and threw it against the wall. Stupid clock.Five minutes later, I felt about ten pokes on my face and tried my hardest to thwart the hand away from my face, but the finger just kept coming back to me.I open my eyes and peer at the blurry figure in front of me and when I see none other than my mother standing there with a tray of waffles, I nearly jump out of my skin."What the hell ma? What are you doing in my apartment?" I use all the blankets I can, to ball with my hands and cover my body. There is something just wrong about being a grown ass man waking up to your mother and breakfast when you have a morning erection because you spent all night and most of the morning thinking about a certain blonde-haired beauty."Oh please, Bean. I birthed you. I spent twelve solid straight hours in the
AnnaI lay over the toilet and continue to dry heave. This is the worst punishment I have ever received."What have I told you Annabelle? I have warned you over and over again, to come home right after school." Father yells from the other room.I can hear Jed attempting to calm him down but it's no use. Father's anger has triumphed over everything. I heave once more and lay my head on the cool toilet bowl, hoping my stomach will stop attempting to get rid of the rest of my dinner."Darling. Why do such a foolish thing." Mother asks from beside me. I can feel her hand pull my hair, the hair that hasn't been ripped out of my scalp, up and past my face so that she can survey the damage.I had gotten home late. Father had told me all week that I was to be in the house by six pm each night. I didn't understand why, and he wouldn't tell me, so I disobeyed him. Truth is, I wanted him to react. I wanted him to punish me. The mission was over. Nicholas Cole was in New York, he no longer wa
AlanI had agreed to the interview.Dad, mom, all four of my sisters and I, would be on a stage, while a woman, Margarette Knowles, would ask us questions, mostly regarding who my father was as a father, husband, and all around good guy. I agreed, and thanks to Anna, only thanks to Anna, was I flying back home to Minneapolis this weekend.When I told Anna about my predicament, I thought she would have just offered me some words of advice and sent me on my way. But when she told me that she would go with me this weekend, my entire demeaner shifted."Short day today huh?" Delilah asks as we pass each other at the mailboxes. I had just come home from speaking to Mr. Moley and requesting this Friday off."Um, yeah, kids had a minimum day. Shorter classes so the teachers could play catch up." I don't know how I should act around Delilah. To say it was a surprise seeing her at Creations when I went in to see Anna is an understatement."Relax. You don't have to be afraid of me. I had no
AnnaSix Years Later"Sweetheart can you tell your father to come in here and grab the steaks?" Laynie asks her daughter Molly. Molly runs out to the back-yard hollering to her father that mommy said to get the 'sticks'.Laynie and both laugh which causes me to hold onto my enormous belly. I am currently eight months pregnant and I swear if there was a way to get this baby out sooner I would do it. Laynie walks over and closes the sliding glass door shut after Molly left it open."So how are you feeling?" Laynie asks coming back to the kitchen and grabbing the salad out of the fridge. We decided to have a barbeque at Alan and I's home for the fourth of July weekend. Shortly after everything went down six years ago, Alan and I got married and bought a house. I fought it at first, but Alan soon convinced me that we knew each other all our lives, we didn't need a timeline for marriage.Jared and Laynie are here with their three children, and Jed will be here soon. We invited Alan
AlanChaos. I've never truly understood the word until now. I've grown up in a house full of people all talking at the same time. I've had over thirty students yelling at the top of their lungs for a sound proof test the school was doing. I've been in a circle of both equal parts nervous and excited football players, preparing themselves for the big game. I've had noise, I've had excitement, I've had an uncontrolled environment. What I've never had, is chaos.I get in the car and drive after the ambulance carrying the woman of my dreams. My mind a flurry of thoughts and images of every moment we have ever spent together. I thought when detective Stephanson told me, Laynie and Jared the entire story of Anna's past, that I was heartbroken then, but nothing is compared the pain I feel in this moment.Thoughts of this morning come rushing back to me as I arrived at Jared's home. Detective Stephanson was there, I had recognized him from when Jared and Laynie were attacked last year i
AnnaMy phone vibrates in my palm once more. I can't answer it, I won't. I already know it's Alan. He has been calling for the last three hours nonstop. His words form last night are still raw and I don't know if I could stand to hear his voice right now. Alan finding out the truth last night has brought me to where I am today.I await the guards to finish frisking me and lower my gaze even further when the lead guard comes over and starts telling me the rules I have already learned. I am let into the room, a different one than the one I am used to being in and wait. Today is the day Jed gets out, and my nerves have given me both jitters and anxiety. I am not only nervous for Jed, I am nervous for me.A loud ringing sound starts, and I look around to see where it is coming from. The sound stops when a door opens, and I see two guards flowing in, followed by my brother. He looks different, almost happy. His long dirty blonde hair is brushed back, and his eyes are bright and vibrant.
AlanI had always assumed I had strength. The strength to move towards my goal as a teacher. The strength to move to a whole new city. The strength to say no anytime someone would offer me a drink at their dinner party, or a small get together. I had no idea that strength, real strength, came from pain.As I sit in my small blue plastic chair sipping on my overly stale coffee and listen to other people talk about what they have endured. What they have gone through, the horrible things they have done to get that last sip, or last hit. I realize that strength, real strength is a small part of what I would need to keep fighting my demons.It has been a week since I have been back in New York. I did what I was meant to do. I went to work, came home, graded papers, said hello to Delilah every morning, saw Laynie and Jared a few times for dinner, everything that was expected of me.What I didn't do, was relax. My mind couldn't. I was too wrapped up in what I had found on my first day
AnnaAnger has never been more clearly evident on someone as it is on me at this moment. As I watch my father waltz into a club full of men who could kill him simply by flicking their wrists, I wonder what his motive must be. If he has been tailing me, and I know he has because he showed up at my apartment the night I flew in from Minneapolis, then he knows what a mistake this is. Alan is here, and if father's plan is to get Alan to see that we still keep in contact, then it's working."What are you doing here father?" I snare at his pungent face. Now that Alan and I are over, something father doesn't know because I bullshited the story of me going over there in the first place, I want him gone even more.After I got home, I was broken. Alan had said some horrible, but truthful things to me and the last thing I wanted was to come home to father sitting comfortably in my armchair. He did what I figured he would. Questioned my trip with the Kings. I told him the very basics. The inter
AlanThere is no greater pain than knowing you caused an innocent person's tragedy. That night I made my decision. I had to change myself. I woke up the next day in the hospital to no Anna. My mother was sitting in the chair next to me, crying. My father nowhere to be seen. My hand was grasping my mother's tight and when the detective came in to tell me of my charges, I watched my father break down for the first time in my lifetime. He was always the strong one, the wall of bravery and courage that never backed down or gave up. He was the sturdiness of our family and I witnessed him crumble over and over again as they named my charges.Edith Monroe Jewel.She was eighteen years old, majoring in economics in college. Her favorite color is orange like the sunset she insisted on watching every night from her dorm. Only child to her parents and used all her money she worked at a movie theatre to buy a ten-year-old Chevy. She was the most innocent face I would ever see, the face that
AlanI remember it like it was it was yesterday. The pain and anguish, as if it were a mere ten seconds ago. She broke my heart that day. I not only learned that I was with someone that wasn't supposed to be with me, but I learned that the world is a cruel and ugly place. I found my place that night. The bottle called to me, and it never stopped.Two Years AgoAnna should be here any moment. I dash over to the kitchen and start cleaning there as well. I never realize how dirty my house is until I know someone is coming over. Anna isn't necessarily a clean freak but knowing my girl, she will bust my ass seven ways to Sunday if she sees my left over Chinese containers from three days ago. I've been a bit busy with helping to tutor little Arnold after school. He will be in my class the year after next and I for one cannot wait. He and his older brother have been having a hard time with their father and he is relying on me to come through for him this summer. I started teaching summ
AnnaI've never felt so helpless in my life. Not even when Jed turned sixteen and instead of a gift, father made him train with a nasty brute of a man named Serge. Father told Serge not to take it easy on Jed and he barely made it out of the match alive. I was eleven, and mother made me watch because my job, was to hopefully seduce Serge if he went too hard on my big brother. Always a way out. No, in this moment, I feel much more anxious than when Jed was slowly dying ten feet in front of me. Alan adjusts his tie for the hundredth time while the host, Margarette Knowles, asks Paul the next question. So far, the questions have been on the subtle side. Why he chose to run now? What he thinks of his competitor? What sorts of things he wants to change in our government. But I know the questions are far from over. She hasn't even asked about Paul about not going to the formal dinner back in New York."So, tell me Mr. King. What did your family think when you announced you were goi
Alan"Okay, either our bags were not on the same flight as we were, or I'm blind and need glasses."I look again at the spinning conveyer displaying everyone's belongings, well, everyone's but ours. We have been here for over ten minutes and I still cannot locate our bags. Should be easy enough with Anna's large Louie Vuitton messenger bag but still, I've got nothing. I look behind me and notice Anna is no longer standing behind me but much farther away. She is looking down at her phone and I feel a ping of insecurity. Ever since we landed, Anna has been on her phone and I don't want to be that boyfriend that snoops, but she is being a bit sneaky and it's making me a bit nervous.Each time I've asked her who it was, she hides the phone from me and says Laynie. I tried looking over her shoulder at the phone, but she types so damn fast and places it inside her jacket pocket, I can't tell who it really is."Alan?" I snap out of my daze and see Anna standing right in front of me with