Chapter 3

A month after Meryl broke off their engagement, Gale made up his mind that the search for Ava Shelley couldn't be postponed any longer. The curiosity and the need for clarity have been consuming him alive. He needs to know who Ava Shelley is.

But Gale was disoriented.

He tried looking for an Ava Shelley on the internet and unfortunately, it didn't lead him to something – anything. There are too many women named Ava Shelley and he had seen hundreds of profiles belong to Ava Shelleys, and nothing rings to him. He needs to find another way to seek her, but he doesn't know what to do.

Looking for her was like looking for a ghost and it drained Gale's energy.

If people notice a change in Gale's behavior, they don't tell.

But that doesn't include Finn – one of Gale's closest friends. The apparent change was extremely drastic for him to just wave it off.

One day when the time for the lunch break comes, he interrogates Gale.

"You're worrying me, Gale," Finn said.

"There's nothing to worry about. I just had a lot in mind." Gale dismissed.

"And now there's no Meryl for you to confide," Finn interjected. "Gale, if you want to come back to her, I'm sure she's willing. You just have to try harder to convince her that you want to be back with her."

For the first time since the conversation between them on the cafeteria table starts; Gale looks straight into Finn's eyes with an unreadable expression.

"Why do you think I want to go back with her, Finn?" Gale prompted.

"I- honestly... I think you want the otherwise..." Finn answered.

"Then why did you say I want to be back with her? Do you want me to be back with her?" Gale asked.

Finn swallowed hard. "Because you look like shit and you've been shutting yourself from everyone. What happened? Maybe I can help and I do want to help you but I don't know how since you never tell me anything." Finn proposed, but he didn't answer Gale's latter question.

Sighing tiredly, Gale put aside his food, having lost his appetite. He looks away from Finn and gazing at the trees outside of the cafeteria.

What happened? He huffed silently. Memory loss happened. Everything has been changing in his life since five years ago. Everything's change when he woke up and didn't know anything about himself.

"Everything, Finn..." Gale looks back to Finn. "Not because of the engagement, not because of Meryl. Everything's changed since five years ago."

Finn looking attentively at his friend and keeps listening.

"I know people said that I am still me, that even if I suffered amnesia, I still act the way I was before the accident but I know I'm not. I don't know myself. I thought I did but now I realize I don't. For example, when I woke up from my coma, people called me Gabe or Gabriel and I didn't like it. I insisted on being called Gale and I know for a fact; Gabe was my nickname since I was born and I never complained about it before the accident, Ben told me that. There's something changed in me that I don't know what. It's frustrating, Finn." Gale said wearily.

Finn stayed silent for a moment, pondering what to respond to Gale's feeling.

"You are still you but I'm not gonna lie, you also not the same Gale as before, some of your old personalities are gone and then you acquire these new personalities that the old Gabriel doesn't have." Finn finally said.

"That much I know..." Gale sighed again then adds. "Something is missing, and I don't know how to find it."

Finn scrunched his brows together in confusion, clearly not quite understanding what Gale means. It's not like personalities can be found, they're made.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked Gale.

Gale looks expectantly at Finn. Should he tell him about the dreams? It feels so odd to share this stuff with him. The last time he shared this to someone – to Meryl, she broke off their engagement.

Would Finn be mad at him if he tells him that he has been dreaming about another girl while he had a relationship with Meryl? His close friend – best friend. The thought of Finn getting angry at him for hurting Meryl making Gale shuddered.

When Finn found out that Meryl broke off the engagement, he came and stormed Gale's apartment unannounced and punched his stomach. He was extremely furious at Gale.

It was a big revelation when Gale saw tears streaming down Finn's cheek as he confessed to him that it kills him to see Meryl loves other man but it kills him more to see her hurt and in tears.

Finn loves Meryl and wanted nothing else but to see her happy. He was so good at hiding his feelings and it made Gale felt stupid for not realizing it. He had hurt not only Meryl but also Finn. He had hurt his best friends.

But by this point, Gale is desperate. He needs help and maybe, just maybe, Finn could help him. Gale took the risk and ask. "Do you by any chance know someone named Ava Shelley?"

Finn was now frowning.

He has known Gale since they were in high school. Pursuing the same passion to become a doctor was the start of their friendship. He knows almost everything about Gale and one thing that really stands out about him; Gale is a charmer. He never does it on purpose, but girls always lined up to gain his attention. He dated and messed around in his adolescence, but he never initiates. It was always the girls that started it.

Gale had never been the guy who goes around asking about girls. Never.

Sometimes around their first year of medical school, Gale stopped his adventures with random girls. Ignoring and refusing girls that flirted with him.

He became pensive and quite looked like a lovesick fool. But no girl made an appearance for the change in Gale's behaviour.

A year later, the accident happened and he lost his memory. He reunited with Meryl, their close friend which Finn knew; secretly harboured feelings for Gale since they were in college. It breaks his heart to see the girl he's in love with loves someone else but he's not a selfish person and concealed his feelings. It was great that two of his best friends got together. He was genuinely delighted for them. But then they split up and Gale is asking him a very out-of-character question. It made Finn wondering that maybe Gale hides something.

"I... I don't think I know. Who is she?" Finn asked skeptic.

"I don't know either..." Gale replied weakly.

"Then why are you asking about her?"

"Forget it," Gale said curtly.

"Does Meryl know about this?"

"Yes. She knows." Gale admitted with a grimace. "She broke off our engagement because of this."

"Okay, explain!" Finn demanded.

"I don't have to explain anything to you, Wade."

"Do you want me to help you or not, Blackwell?" Finn countered. "Honestly, my mind is filled with so many accusations for you right now, but I try to be level-headed and want to help you. So, spill!"

Gale groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose.

Taking one deep breath and exhaling it slowly, Gale squared his shoulder and propped his elbows on top of the table. He looks straight into Finn's eyes and hopes that Finn wouldn't take this in the wrong way like Meryl did when he first told her about the dreams.

Gale started slowly and Finn waits patiently. "I have these dreams since I woke up from my coma... About someone named Ava Shelley."

Finn looks flabbergasted but doesn't say anything. He nodded his head to encourage Gale to continue.

"I don't know her or maybe I know but I can't recall because of my amnesia. I thought that these dreams I have about her were silly. But somehow, Meryl is convinced that Ava is real and she's out there – probably waiting for me..." Gale sighed, his head hurt.

"How long does she know about this?" Finn asked slowly.

Gale wrinkled his nose while thinking. "Two or three years, I guess. A couple of months after we started dating."

"How did she take it?" Finn asked again.

Gale looks at him disapprovingly. "Bad. She thought I was cheating on her." when Finn doesn't utter anything to retort, Gale continued. "But I swear, I'm not cheating on her. I don't even think Ava Shelley is real – not until a year ago when Meryl kept insisting that Ava is real. We tried everything to stop those dreams – we even tried hypnosis but it was useless. Those dreams about her nevertheless come to me insistently. And I think Meryl just fed up, she couldn't take it any longer and she's done with me. She told me I should find her. And now here I am, telling you this in an effort of finding her."

Gale took the spoon that rested on his tray and started to push the food absent-mindedly.

"Do you know how she looks like?" Finn asked.

Gale shook his head. "I don't know who I'm looking for. This is crazy." He sighed dejectedly.

"You never saw her in your dreams?" Finn asked again, confusion etched on his face.

"No, it's only ever been me inside of those dreams. Me talking to myself and say her name."

Finn stayed silent and thinking. He wants to help Gale, but there are not enough clues.

"Have you tried looking on the internet?" Finn prompted.

Gale nodded. "Hundreds of profiles. Nothing rings."

"Who else knows about this?"

"The psychiatrist who did my hypnosis."

"Does Ben know?"

"No," Gale said curtly.

"It is possible he knows."

"Maybe..." Gale sighed. "Don't think too hard about this, Finn. If I meant to find her, I will, no matter how."

Finn agreeing and continue to eat his remaining meal. His mind still reeling but he respects Gale's decision to put a stop to this matter.

Still pushing around the food with his spoon, Gale thought about what Finn said. Why did he never ask about Ava to Ben? Maybe he knows something.

"Anyways," Gale breathed out. Finn looks up to him and waits for what he's going to say. "I'll take a break for a couple of weeks in July. Probably back in early August."

Finn nodded his head. "Good plan, you need some rest." He halts for a second then adds. "What are you gonna do? Are you going somewhere?"

"Golden," Gale said without looking at Finn. "I'll be staying with Ben and his family. His wife gave birth last month, and I want to see them." Gale said with a soft smile tugging on his lips.

For a moment he allows himself to forget about Ava Shelley and just basking in the feeling of being a new uncle. Not that he doesn't have any nephew or niece. He has. They are many of them from his mother's family side. But since they altogether neglected him when he needed them after the accident, he doesn't really care and doesn’t want to be close with any of them. Besides, Ben informed him that even his deceased mother was not close with her own family. That made everything make sense of why they didn't give a single shit about him in times of need.

Ben though, he had been there and he was only twenty-eight years old at that moment. He helped Gale through thick and thin. He didn't do much since he was busy with his own life but still, he was there and he cares.

"It'll be the first time you will go there since the accident, right?" Finn asked, breaking Gale from his stupor.

"Yeah. Ben said that the air crash was when I'm on my way back to Toronto from Golden. To be honest I'm scared to go there and simply had no business on going there. Besides, the house– my dad's childhood home was unoccupied and I just didn't have any reason to visit, not until Ben decided to move in after he got married. Now, I have a reason to go there again. So, be it. Road trip here we go." Gale explained.

"You're not going by plane?"

"No, not if I can prevent it. I'm frightened." Gale said, his jaw set.

Finn looks at Gale sympathetically. But he doesn't want to make Gale feel vulnerable so he diverts the conversation.

"When you get there, ask about Ava Shelley. Maybe Ben knows something about her." Finn said.

Gale frowned but nods his head. "Yeah, maybe he knows."