Unable to get comfortable, I huff in frustration and roll onto my side. I've slept soundly ever since Roman moved into my house, easily falling into slumber and waking well-rested in the morning.But not tonight.His absence has me unable to relax or shut off my brain.Unsure if he would show up, I prepared dinner and ate alone in silence. Then I spent the rest of the evening flipping through two counseling manuals I ordered online and peeking out the window to see if Marco was still sitting outside the house.He was. Instead of packing up the leftovers, I put together a plate and brought it out to him. At first, he was taken aback by the gesture but quickly accepted my offering. I decided to turn in around ten. I'm still wide awake at eleven when the front door opens and closes. The hallway floorboards creak under Roman's footfalls. My breath catches when he pauses outside my closed bedroom door. I'm tempted to get up and open it, but don't. If anything is ever going to h
No longer able to bear the separation, I close the distance until he has to crane his neck to hold my gaze. His eyes turn pleading. I've never seen this kind of raw vulnerability shine from them. Roman shifts uncomfortably under the weight of my gaze, and it makes me fall even harder for him. I want to wrap my arms around him and never let go. "If you're smart," he growls, "you'll tell me to get the fuck out of your house and never come back again." When I say nothing, he snaps, "Say the damn words, Sofia! Tell me to leave!"A gurgle of laughter escapes from my lips.Does he actually think that's going to happen?Doesn't he understand that I'm powerless to send him away?I reach out and stroke my hands through his closely cut hair. Electricity zips through me from the contact. "I can't do that." I won't do it. Nothing he says or does could make me walk away from him.He has to know that he's asking for the impossible.His gaze pierces mine, full of turmoil and the responsib
I wake with a jolt, my eyes flying open as memories of what happened last night flood my brain.Jackknifing up, I glance at the other side of the bed.It's empty.For a confused moment, I sift through my memories, trying to decide if it was nothing more than an erotic dream or if Roman and I actually ended up in bed together.An ache between my thighs flares to life as I shift against the sheets.Definitely not a dream.I exhale, disappointed yet unsurprised that Roman is no longer warming my bed.Roman lost the battle against his attraction to me last night. His absence this morning indicates he's still struggling with the idea of us.Flopping back against the pillows, I rehash everything that occurred. How he took me in the kitchen (note to self: scrub counter with anti-bacterial cleanser), then carried me to the bedroom where we made love and fell asleep in each other's arms.I have no idea when Roman got out of bed or where he went, but he couldn't have gone far. He wouldn't lea
Roman and I lay entwined on the couch in my living room watching TV. Some sort of action movie is on. I have no idea what the name of it is. Or if there's a plot. Every so often, there's an explosion, gunfire, and a car chase.Having Roman stretched out beneath me is pure bliss.I could stay like this forever.That dangerous thought continues to rattle around in my brain. As much as I push it aside, it stubbornly returns to the forefront of my mind and grows stronger with each passing day.Once the movie ends, Roman shifts under me. I'm so comfortable that I don't want to budge. I want to find a way to stop time. Or at least slow it down. This is the most content I've ever felt in my life. The thought of this inner peace disappearing as quickly as it came about is painful. I don't think I could bear for our relationship to go back to the way it was. Not after being so intimate with him. And not after opening up and giving him every little piece of myself.I keep hoping tha
A bell trills overhead as I push through the door of a high-end bridal boutique on Michigan Avenue.Grace officially begins her search for the perfect wedding gown today, and my head swims with the reality that her relationship with Matteo has progressed at breakneck speed.A year ago, my brother hit the town every night of the week with a different beautiful woman hanging off his arm. He wasn't the least bit interested in settling down with one specific female.He avoided intimate relationships altogether. That changed the moment Grace became a part of his life. I guess what they say is true-when you meet the right person, you just know. Love has the power to change your entire world.It saddens me that even though I have those same emotions for Roman, there doesn't seem to be a way for us to make our relationship work. I've tried breaking down his resistance, but he continues to hold steady. There's nothing more for me to do but accept the cold, hard reality that the relationsh
A wheel on the shopping cart squeaks as I roll down the cereal aisle.From beneath my lashes, I sneak a glance at Roman as he walks next to me. Memories of the last time we were in the grocery store together flit through my head. That was almost three weeks ago, and our relationship couldn't be more different. I pluck a box of Honey Nut Cheerios from a shelf and hold it up. "We ran out this morning." I give it a little shake after a few beats of silence. "You like these, right?" Getting an answer out of him is like pulling teeth sometimes.His lips lift into an expression that could almost pass for a smile. "Yes, I like them."I drop the box into the cart and roll my eyes. "Was that so difficult?""Extremely."I grab a small box of Grapenuts from the top shelf.A month ago, I ate bowls of the crunchy cereal for dinner. I haven't done that since Roman began staying at the house. As I'm about to toss it in with the other groceries, I hesitate. Holding this box makes me realiz
I raise my brows at Roman, who studiously avoids my gaze.MaryAnn, who must be his sister or sister-in-law, turns and faces me again. "Oh, I'm sorry!" She gives Roman an expectant look. When he says nothing, she huffs out a breath and smiles, thrusting her hand toward me. "Apparently Roman isn't going to bother introducing us. I'm MaryAnn, his sister-in-law, and the two hellions that ran past are my boys. The taller one is Jacob, and the other is Logan.""Sofia." I take hold of her hand. "It's nice to meet you."Dozens of questions swirl through my head. I glance at Roman and find his eyes already on me. A strange guardedness I've seen countless times before lurks in them.The boys run back down the aisle and hurtle their small bodies at their uncle.Roman scoops them up into his arms with practiced ease, shaking them until they shriek with uncontrollable laughter. His discomfort dissolves, and his guard drops as he focuses on his nephews with a joyful smile that makes my he
I scan Roman's one-bedroom apartment, trying to absorb every minute detail.He lives in the city near the Loop, about two blocks from the El. We've been here for forty minutes, and I've already heard two trains rumble past. Roman lurks in front of the door. I get the feeling he wants to give me a quick tour and escort me out. Well, that's not going to happen. It took three weeks to get him to this point, and I'm not about to be rushed now that I'm here."I told you there wasn't much to see," he says.I throw a smile over my shoulder and meander around, looking for anything that will give me insight into who this man is. "It's nice."He snorts but doesn't argue.The living room has a small brown leather couch and matching chair crammed into it with an end table wedged between them. A large flat-screen television is attached to the wall across from the seating arrangement. Other than that, the space is bare. No posters or art hang on the stark white walls, and there aren't any
Mama moves around me and stands toe-to-toe with Roman, who bows his head in deference even though he towers over her. Her fingers slide under his chin and turn his head from one side to the other so she can take a good look at his bruised and bloodied face. "You were let off easy. Don't make my husband regret his generosity.""I won't," Roman says gravely."I always liked you," she muses. "It's disappointing to realize you spent so many years lying to us."Regret flashes across his face. "I'm sorry about that, Mrs. V. If I could go back and change it, I would." His gaze dips to me. "But then I wouldn't have met Sofia."Mama tilts her head to the side, her fingers digging into his chin as she studies him. "If you hurt my darling girl or this grandbaby, there will be nowhere on this earth you can hide that I will not hunt you down."Roman winces as her fingernails cut into his skin. "I'm asking for the chance to make Sofia happy. I want to give her the life she deserves." Loo
Surprisingly, my brothers release Roman right away.Roman leans against me, trying to hold himself upright so as not to appear weak in front of my family. We stagger toward a leather armchair, and he slowly lowers himself onto it. The swelling and bruises have worsened in the last few minutes. His right eye is almost fused shut and a rainbow of streaks color his chin.As I turn to face my family, my gaze lands on my mother, who I hadn't realized was standing behind me. Grace is there as well, her blue eyes wide as saucers."You don't have to do this," Roman mumbles.I slip my hand into his and rub his knuckles with my thumb. "Yes, I do." My parents, my brothers, and Grace are all on one side of the room while Roman and I occupy the other. I've never felt so isolated from them. My family has always stood together. That's what we do. The Valentinis present a united front to anyone who tries to harm us.And I'm breaking that code by defying them.Is this man worth it?Is he wor
I shoot Grace a questioning look over my mother's shoulder, but the other woman shrugs in response. "I'm just relieved that you're okay." Mama tucks a lock of hair behind my ear and pats my shoulder.I frown in confusion. "Why wouldn't I be?" Is she referring to the Russian situation? I can't imagine my father hasn't kept her up-to-date with the recent developments. "Roman never let me out of his sight, Mama. I was perfectly safe the entire time."Instead of softening with relief, her expression turns murderous. Her dark eyes fill with a mixture of contempt and disgust. She glances toward the wing my father's office is located in. "That man will no longer be working for us."My throat closes. "What are you talking about?"She shoots a nasty glare at the hallway. "He's a traitor.""Roman?" I breathe."Don't ever say that man's name in this house again!" she snaps, drawing herself up to her full height.I thought we had time to make a plan before talking to my father. But we
"Once I earned Enzo's trust, he brought me to the compound himself and gave me access to the heart of the operation. He opened his home to me and treated me like a son." His eyes drop to his lap."He cared about you. He still does. He planned for you to take over since my brothers have no interest," I grate out, unable to hide the fury tinging my voice at how Roman duped my father.Roman shakes his head and runs a hand over his closely cut hair. "I know."His troubled gaze meets mine again, and my heart softens because I can tell he's just as conflicted over the situation as I am."This assignment was supposed to be a two-year stint. I was instructed to make connections in the lower ranks and gather intel. Just as I was about to be pulled out, Enzo took an interest in me. No one had managed to make it into the Valentini inner circle before. My lieutenant and the DA decided to let me stay. But the problem is that you can't work undercover indefinitely. The deeper you get entr
A guard waves our car through the gate, and we pull into the wooded grounds of the Valentini compound.Roman received a text from my father informing him that the Russian threat has been eliminated. I'm no longer in danger, and my security detail has been called off.It's a relief to have one less issue to worry about. My hand rests on my stomach as Roman navigates the long driveway. Neither of us said much during the twenty-minute ride. I think we're both in shock. I know I am. I may have suspected this outcome, but was still unprepared for it. I shift on the seat as Roman glances at me and wait for him to start this much-needed conversation.He doesn't though. He just continues to drive in silence as the test results flash through my brain for the hundredth time.I'm pregnant.I'm going to give birth to a tiny human being in less than nine months.My whole world has just been rocked. There's no going back to the way it used to be. I would be lying if I didn't admit that th
I rush toward my car in the school parking lot with one thing on my mind.And that's stopping at the pharmacy on the way home to get a pregnancy test.In my two years as a high school counselor, I've had several girls pop into my office, frightened that they could be pregnant. The first thing I tell them is to talk to their parents because this isn't an issue they should deal with on their own. The second is to take a test. For the most accurate results, I advise them to make an appointment with their family doctor or Planned Parenthood to run blood work and take a urine test. If they aren't comfortable with either of those options, I tell them to pick up a home pregnancy test.Most of the time, they stop in and tell me their results were negative. We then have a come-to-Jesus discussion regarding safe sex practices. Abstinence is the only foolproof method, but that's not a realistic option for many teenagers nowadays. And I get that. We go over the different kinds of birth con
I scrutinize my appearance in the mirror to make sure I'm at least semi-presentable. Unfortunately, I look like death warmed over. The best thing I can do at this point is call it a day. I'll let Sherry know I'm taking a few hours of sick time and head home. I can drive over to the compound once I feel better and tell my parents about Roman's deception in person.Just as I'm shutting down my computer, Ella pokes her head through the open doorway."Hey, Ms. B, do you have a few minutes?" She smiles."Hi, Ella." I hold my hands up, palms out in a stay-put fashion because I don't want her to get sick if I've picked up a virus. "Don't get too close. I'm not feeling very well. I was just about to head home for the afternoon."Her expression turns sympathetic. "That sucks."I chuckle. Throwing up at work in the middle of the afternoon sucks big time. "It really does.""Hopefully whatever you caught will pass quickly. Is it a stomach bug?""I think so.""I bet some Saltine cracke
I blink back tears, refusing to let him see how much he's shattered me. "You should have done us both a favor and never given in."He scrubs a hand over his face. "Don't you think I know that?" he asks in a low, ugly snarl. "Don't you think I fought my feelings every single goddamn day? Every fucking moment was a battle. The last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you. You have to believe that."Unable to listen anymore, I stand. "I don't know what to believe. I need to get to work.""I expected you to call Enzo last night." He tilts his head. "Why didn't you?"I look away.That's an excellent question. One I've asked myself a million times already. I should have called my father right after getting in the cab.Papa would have snapped up Roman by now.Which is precisely why I didn't do anything.Because I can't sentence the man I love to death.My shoulders slump as I acknowledge my own truths. This delay doesn't mean I won't tell my family. It just means I haven't placed
Groaning, I roll toward the alarm clock and slap it.My eyelids feel like they've been cemented shut. Prying them open takes a Herculean effort. Unable to force my limbs into action, I lay in bed as memories of yesterday assault me.Roman is an undercover police officer.Never in a million years could I have foreseen this. If anything, I'd wondered if he worked for the Russians.But the police?The Chicago PD?No. I feel completely blindsided by the revelation. What am I going to do? Acknowledging what a mess this situation is makes me burrow deeper under the covers, wishing I could stay in bed for the rest of the day. Maybe the next few. I had a difficult time falling asleep after getting home because my mind wouldn't click off. As a result, I feel tired and irritable.I would love to call in sick, but can't.Two parent meetings and an IEP are on my agenda for today. These parents have rearranged their schedules to come in and discuss their children's educational needs, whic