I lean against Nate's locker with a stupid grin on my face as Nate tells me once again to not make a big deal out of his birthday. I promise him that I won't but we both know that that is a lie. "If I did happen to make a big deal out of your birthday," I say as I crane my neck around to see his face, "what exactly would be considered too over the top?"Nate shuts his locker and leans against it with his shoulder, facing me. "Singing. Definitely singing."My mouth pops open. "You can't be serious.""I'm being very serious.""Why?" I ask grinning up at him. I didn't have anything planned per say but I did have something in mind. I already talked to his small group of friends about surprising him at my house for a surprise party and they were all for it. It would be kept small and comfortable. Like a normal night out with his friends plus me. "Because." Nate swoops down and kisses my forehead. "You are a terrible singer, love."My skin warms at his endearment. "I am not." His fingers
Nate's three friends show up five minutes to six o'clock which I am grateful for because everything is a total mess. For someone who is always on top of things when it comes to organization, I am an even bigger mess than my house. The beer is set out on my parent's long dining room table for hands to grab, thanks to Justin, Danny's cousin. He is the only one I know who would pull through at such short notice. "Where are your parents?" Molly asks while hanging up a birthday banner by the staircase. "My father has a Dartmouth reunion for his fraternity that he attends every ten years. My mother likes to tag along. I guess I just got lucky that it happens to be on the same day as Nate's birthday." "It's funny how things work out, isn't it." She ties the farthest string around the ceiling beam and then steps down off the chair."Yeah," I reply, moving the beer cans in a straighter line to distract myself. "Is it." My phone dings in my back pocket and it's Nate, telling me he is ready
He takes a sip of his drink to hide his discomfort of the situation. I hold back my laughter as I watch the distaste reflect on his face. I bring my lips to the shell of his ear. "After a few, you find you forget how awful it tastes," I tell him, still amused. His pure aura is enough to make a person levitate towards him.He shrugs with his face directed on his cup. "It's not too bad."He's lying and that makes me laugh and brace myself against his chest. He smiles too from the sound of it and angles his face towards mine. I could look at him for the rest of my life."What kind of game?" Nate challenges, dragging his attention from my face. I bite my tongue. Alyssa taps her cherry red lips as she thinks. "How about beer pong?"I continue to bite my tongue. I can't bite my tongue anymore. I go open my mouth to call them morons who walk on two flat feet but Nate beats me to it. He must have felt my body tense up. "Oh! Or flippy cup. That's a fun one," Mariah pipes in. "How about Ke
We tumble into my room like a tornado, clothes flying throughout the air as the need to be as close as physically possible to each other invades every pore. We both knew what we had wasn't a normal infatuation like other couples our age. We are young, but the need for each other is an ancient soul connecting kind. My mind, body, and soul, yearned to connect with Nate's on every level.It simply hurt to say I love you because those words alone didn't feel justified for what I feel for him. With Nate, I feel whole. I feel alive. And death would rightfully collect my fulfilled soul if someone took Nate from me. The thought is too painful. With great concentration, Nate step out of his jeans while trying to keep his lips connected to some part of my body. The mere activity of pulling away for a second is too tedious. I stumbled while wiggling out of mine but Nate catches me before I fall forward on my face. He laughs and the sound is magical. I feel it in every touch of his skin aga
I can't speak. I can't breathe. I can't see through the tears that blur my vision. Every kiss, every smile, every bit of confessed love, comes down to this moment. I can only pray that Nate forgives me. But I understand if he doesn't. I don't think I would if the roles were reversed. I need to stop being such a coward and come clean to this wonderful, concerned looking, man in front of me. But Nate isn't the only one that has gathered. Trent, Gavin, and of course, Molly, stand by his side like guardsmen. Alyssa and Johnny come up behind Danny and me. "Tell me what?" Nate repeats when I don't speak right away. All of the words that I have managed to learn from the age of birth have vanished into thin air.Danny steps forward and places a hand on my shoulder and I shrink. "Listen man, there's something I need to confess to," Danny says in a low drawl. His shoulders are squared and his stance is progressive but I can't let him continue. "Me too," Johnny surprises me by saying, look
I haven't gotten out of bed in seven days, only getting up to use the bathroom and sip some water. With all the tears I have cried, my body craved all the liquid I would allow myself to consume. The first day, I cried. I cried throughout the night, the evening of heartbreak playing over and over in my head. Could I have said something differently to make him not react the way he did? The answer to that is no. But I could not except that. The second day, I continued to cry, except this day, my mother came into my room. I claimed sick, which wasn't false. I couldn't eat which left me dry heaving when my body begged for me to help itself. "Do I need to call a doctor?" She had asked, pressing a thin hand to my forehead. I dodged it and pulled my covers up and over my unwashed hair. "Oh my Heavens, are you pregnant?""No, Momma. Leave me alone. I'm sick," I droned, closing my eyes to block it all out. My mother ignored me like normal and yanked on my sheets to expose me again. "I'm cal
I haven't gotten out of bed in seven days, only getting up to use the bathroom and sip some water. With all the tears I have cried, my body craved all the liquid I would allow myself to consume. The first day, I cried. I cried throughout the night, the evening of heartbreak playing over and over in my head. Could I have said something differently to make him not react the way he did? The answer to that is no. But I could not except that. The second day, I continued to cry, except this day, my mother came into my room. I claimed sick, which wasn't false. I couldn't eat which left me dry heaving when my body begged for me to help itself. "Do I need to call a doctor?" She had asked, pressing a thin hand to my forehead. I dodged it and pulled my covers up and over my unwashed hair. "Oh my Heavens, are you pregnant?""No, Momma. Leave me alone. I'm sick," I droned, closing my eyes to block it all out. My mother ignored me like normal and yanked on my sheets to expose me again. "I'm cal
You know when your mind sees something that is so utterly beautiful, so unworldly that it distinctively focuses on the pinnacle of its interest, zeroing in on that magnificent sight, having everything else blur in the background?That's what Nate's eyes did to me. The golden, caramel orbs locked on mine and it was all I could see. His eyes are red rimmed as if the surgery was still taken its toll but his face is bare and so responsive. The butterflies, the ones that have become paralyzed a few weeks back, twitch and flutter when Nate's pupils dilate and his clear, breathtaking eyes roam around my face before dropping down my body. I hold my breath as he does so, wanting so badly to see what he is seeing. One of his family members behind me says something but it is muffled in my ears and Nate either ignores it or doesn't hear them either because he remains unmoving in the doorway while I stay crouched in my position of the floor, my letter forgotten about. It is held limply in my h