Chapter 1

ELEANOR—

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As I lay on the bed, enveloped in my husband's warmth, I nestle my back deeply into his arms, feeling his gentle grip on my waist as he pulls me closer.

Soft, tender kisses dance across my skin, sending shivers down my spine.

The blood-boiling sex we shared still resonates, the lingering sensations on my skin and between my legs a reminder of our loving encounter.

His arms around me tighten more and his lips press on the bane of my shoulder igniting more warmth in my body.

His lips move to my neck where he kisses me passionately and excitedly and then moves to my cheeks where he places the last few kisses before letting his mouth leave me.

I’d be a liar if I said I didn’t want to melt into Arthur and absorb his entirety.

Surprisingly this time his touch feels more intimate than before, more secure, and more enthusiastic.

It’s not unlike Arthur to touch me or kiss me, but tonight just feels different— different in a way that keeps me satisfied and pleasure-filled.

I can feel love from his fingertips.

The way his hand remains firm on my waist like a perfect puzzle piece that needs to perfect my body.

I lean into him and he collects me even more.

The room is silent with only our heavy breathing entertaining the night.

I love this feeling, this moment.

Our marriage isn’t one for the books, one look at us and a person can tell how distant we are as a married couple.

But tonight, I feel like tonight changed things.

I can’t explain it in literal meaning but the way Arthur touched me. I’m so glad we’ve become that loving couple I’ve always wanted us to be.

To be in our matrimonial home and feel as though we are one.

I feel Arthur’s breathing on my neck before he softly calls my name.

His thick voice vibrates in his chest.

“El,” he calls.

He calls me El short for Eleanor and I think it’s the most lovely word I’ve ever heard in my entire life.

“Hmm?” I reply gently, matching his tone.

I listen to him breathe out another exhausted sigh.

“Let’s get a divorce” Arthur adds softly and I pause.

I did not hear wrong.

“What?” I hear myself asking.

My throat starts to feel clogged.

“I don’t— I don’t understand” I swallow.

“Brianna is back in Manhattan and I think it’s for the best. I am presently preparing the papers.”

Brianna?

Her name rings a thousand bells but I don’t need a divine entity to tell me she’s the woman she actually wants and not me.

I hate how soft his voice is, I hate how coated and calm he’s sounding when he’s brewing such a storm in my ears like this. No one is supposed to sound casual filing for a divorce.

A divorce.

After all, we just had?

I don’t speak— it’s not that I don’t know what to say, I do, But my voice feels like it’s frozen and it’s being stung by thousands of bees.

His hands around my waist shift to sit there properly and I realize we’re both naked, in each others’ hands and he is propelling a divorce.

What did I expect?

I should have seen this coming—No, I did see it coming!

Our marriage is like many others - built on respect and a harmonious home life. Though with less intimacy.

And I couldn't forget, that this union was a transaction, an arrangement born of circumstance rather than love.

I have to remember my position in this carefully constructed life.

I shouldn’t get pierced by a divorce I saw coming.

I just thought he’d love me enough one day. I have been stupid!

What we had was a marriage of convenience, You get what you see and leave.

Four years ago while my life was at a crossroads, fate brought an unexpected opportunity to my doorstep: marriage to Arthur Newton.

At the time, Arthur was fighting a debilitating battle with severe skin ulceration, a cruel consequence of a malicious act by a business rival who had secretly laced his drink with a harmful substance. The Newtons' reputation had suffered greatly due to Arthur's illness, and his family was willing to pay a hefty price to anyone who would agree to marry him.

I knew at the back of my mind that one day we would come to an end and our marriage was only based on materialistic yearning.

I’ll never be close to what Arthur had with Brianna, even as his wife, even after four years of being married and being free of his skin illness.

Was loving each other only from my end then? I didn’t imagine this, right?

I cannot deny my sudden broken heart— shattered even. But this was all for business.

I release Arthur’s hand from my waist and get on my feet, pulling the bed’s duvet to cover my naked body.

“Alright then” I nod, trying to sound normal. “I’ll await the divorce papers”

Arthur’s expression goes stoic.

“Where are you going?” He looks at me as if I’m committing a crime but his voice remains careful and warm.

“I think I should leave, It will be—

“It’s already late, stay for the night, you can leave tomorrow” he adjusts his broad body on the bed, his voice polite and gentle.

I nod and avoid eye contact.

Gently, I lay back on the bed and try to push the lump in my throat but it’s not working. Arthur turns around with his back facing me and I let my lips quiver.

He switches off the night table light and my eyes start to sting in the room’s darkness.

We’re both quiet and I try my best not to let my breathing sound haggard.

I think Arthur is asleep but I’m proved wrong when he starts to speak.

“Eleanor?” His voice is almost like a whisper that I almost didn’t catch.

“Yes?” I turn to face his back in the darkness.

“Who is Leon?” He asks.

I stop breathing.

How did he know about Leon?

Trying to process my words, my mind, and why and how he knows about a person who seems like a figment of time in my life, clogs my throat, and before I can reply Arthur speaks up.

His voice starts to come out solemn and low.

“Well, I’m sorry for taking up four years of your life, I hope you will be happy in the future. Goodnight Eleanor,”

—