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CHAPTER 2: I Fucking Loved It
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2025-03-26 18:52:43"James," I said, voice tight.
"Yeah?"
"Shut the fuck up."
He burst out laughing. Actually laughing. Like this was the funniest shit in the world.
I clenched my jaw so hard it hurt. My patience was already stretched thin, and James acting like this was some kind of joke wasn’t helping.
"You’re real fucking annoying, you know that?" I muttered.
"Yeah, yeah, I love you too, man," he said, still amused. "So what now? You gonna sulk about this all night? Or—wait—" He gasped dramatically. "Don’t tell me you’re obsessed with Pretty Boy now."
I nearly threw my damn phone out the window.
"I’m not fucking obsessed," I snapped.
"Uh-huh. You sure? ’Cause you stormed out of the bar like a lover scorned."
"James."
"Like a princess whose hand was refused—"
I ended the call and tossed my phone onto the passenger seat.
Fucking asshole.
I focused on the road, but irritation burned under my skin like a low flame. My mood had already been shit when I left the bar, but somehow, James had made it worse. Now I felt like I had an itch I couldn’t scratch.
Then my phone vibrated again, and I cursed under my breath. “What the fuck—”
I reached over to grab my phone from the passenger seat, barely sparing a glance at the road as I unlocked it. If it was James, I was gonna lose my shit.
But it wasn’t.
The notification wasn’t from my texts, wasn’t from I*******m or any of my usual group chats.
It was from OnlyFans.
A slow grin spread across my lips.
Now that was the kind of notification I didn’t mind.
I tapped it open, my annoyance momentarily fading as I checked my account. A new message, a fat-ass tip, and a comment from one of my subscribers telling me how fucking hot my last video was.
Goddamn.
That was exactly what I needed.
I could already feel the tension in my shoulders easing, my mood shifting. Yeah, being ignored was frustrating. Yeah, getting laughed at by your friends fucking sucked. Yeah, Andrew Parker was a smug little shit.
But this?
This was my thing.
Not just the money—though, fuck, the money was good. Better than I ever expected when I first started. But it wasn’t about that. Not really.
It was the attention.
That raw, undivided focus. The way people craved me, needed me, hung on to every word, every movement. Every time I posted, the reactions poured in instantly. Desperate. Thirsty. Obsessed.
And I fucking loved it.
Every man had his kink.
This just happened to be mine.
A little secret. A little indulgence. Something just for me.
I flipped through the messages, skimming over the comments, the praise, the requests. Some of them were standard—compliments, heart emojis, the usual fuck, you’re hot as hell messages.
Others?
A little more interesting.
I smirked, already considering what I would post next, already picturing the reactions, the rush of notifications.
By the time I parked and stepped out of my car, my mood had done a complete 180. I stretched my arms over my head, rolling my shoulders as I made my way toward my apartment building. The air was crisp, the cold biting through my hoodie, but I barely felt it. My phone buzzed in my hand, and I swiped through my notifications, grinning at the flood of thirsty comments rolling in.
‘Damn, I needed this after a shit day.’
‘Your body should be illegal.’
‘Daddy, step on me.’
I huffed out a laugh. Never got old.
As I passed by my neighbors, I actually nodded in acknowledgment, which was a rare fucking occurrence.
“Evening,” Mrs. Carter greeted, pulling her little yappy dog along.
“Evening,” I replied, shocking even myself with how friendly I sounded.
Damn, I really was in a better mood. Nothing like a reminder that thousands of people would sell their souls just to get a glimpse of me.
I scrolled absently as I climbed the stairs to my floor, sifting through messages and tips, until a certain post made me stop in my tracks.
A heat sparked low in my stomach, shooting straight to my groin.
Anonymous69.
Fucking hell.
I swore under my breath, my grip tightening on my phone as I opened the post.
This guy—this guy—was a goddamn menace.
He had way more fans than me, and it wasn’t hard to see why. Every time he dropped something, people lost their fucking minds. And me? I wasn’t any different.
The picture was pure sin.
Perfectly sculpted abs, low-hanging sweats, just enough of a tease to make my blood rush south at an alarming speed. The caption?
Thinking about misbehaving tonight.
Jesus fucking Christ.
My fingers twitched, resisting the urge to drop everything and reply like some desperate fanboy. But fuck if it wasn’t tempting.
I had no idea who Anonymous69 really was, but I knew one thing—whoever he was, he owned the internet. Hell, he probably owned me at this point.
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Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 3: Collab
My thumb hovered over the screen for a split second, and before I could talk myself out of it, I sent him a message. A simple 'Hi'. Casual. No big deal but the second I did—Ding.A reply popped up.Anonymous69: Hey.I froze.The fuck?I stared at my screen like it had just grown legs and started dancing. There was no way. No fucking way.Anonymous69—the Anonymous69—replied me!My heart kicked up, a weird mix of excitement and panic slamming into my chest.Was this real? Did I hit my head at some point tonight? Was I hallucinating?I needed to sit down. No— I needed to move.With my phone still clutched in my hand, I booked it down the hall, shoving my apartment key into the lock with shaking fingers. The door banged open, and I stepped inside, slamming it shut behind me like I was escaping a fucking serial killer instead of a hot-ass OnlyFans creator sending me a message.“Holy shit,” I breathed, my back against the door.My phone buzzed again, and I nearly dropped it.I needed a sec
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-03-26Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 4: Running Late
This day was supposed to be perfect.I was supposed to wake up, hit the gym, maybe grab a coffee, and then, the best part—meet up with Anonymous69. In the flesh. Finally.Instead, here I was, standing outside my apartment, staring down at a sniveling mess of a person I really didn’t have time for."Please," he begged, voice cracking like a cheap phone screen. "I swear it didn’t mean anything!"I groaned, dragging a hand through my hair. "Why today of all fucking days?"Like, seriously. I hadn’t heard from him in months, and now, the second I had somewhere to be, he decided to pop up like a goddamn fungus?He clutched my wrist, looking up at me with wide, tear-filled eyes. "I miss you. I swear I’ll do anything, just—just give me another chance. I’ll make it up to you."I closed my eyes, inhaling deeply through my nose. My patience was hanging by a fucking thread.I pried his fingers off me one by one, shaking my head. "Listen, dipshit." My voice was sharp, cutting through his pathetic
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-03-26Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 5: Anonymous69 Review
By the time I finally pulled up to the hotel, I was two seconds away from committing a felony.Yes, you heard me.Two fucking seconds!Traffic had drained every ounce of patience I had left, and if one more dumbass had cut me off on the road, I might’ve just abandoned my car in the middle of the street and walked the rest of the way.But I was here now.I parked, killed the engine, and took a deep breath before stepping out.The hotel was fancy—way fancier than anywhere I usually went. Glass doors, gold trim, sleek lighting. The kind of place that smelled like money.I adjusted my jacket and walked inside, the cool air-conditioning a blessed relief after the nightmare that was my drive.The lobby was all polished marble and overpriced modern art. A huge chandelier hung from the ceiling, casting warm light over the check-in desk, where a well-dressed receptionist was typing away at a computer.I strode up, planting my hands on the counter. "Hey, I’m here to check in. Should be a reserv
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-03-26Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 6: I Wanted More
I shoved Andrew Parker away. "One shoot," I bit out. My pulse was already pounding, my temper hanging by a thread. "That’s it." Andrew barely stumbled, his stupid towel staying perfectly in place like it was glued to his hips. He just lifted a brow, "One shoot, huh?" His lips curled to a soft smile. "Sounds fair." Fair, my ass. But whatever. I was already here. And if I was gonna humiliate myself, I might as well make some cash while doing it. Andrew turned, walking back into the hotel room, and I followed, jaw clenched so hard I thought I might crack a tooth. The suite was nice. Plush carpet, sleek furniture, soft lighting. A huge bed with crisp white sheets—practically begging to be ruined. I refused to think about that. "Let’s get this over with." I said, crossing my arms. Without looking remotely phased, he ran a hand through his hair, and—of fucking course— let his towel drop to the floor like it was nothing. Jesus. Fucking. Christ. I immediately looked away, my jaw lo
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-04-03Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 7: The World Kept Turning
The door clicked shut behind me, and I exhaled like I had been holding my breath for a goddamn hour.Everything about that was awful.The heat still clung to my skin, every nerve buzzing like I had just walked through a live fire. My lips tingled, not from a kiss—but from how close I was to doing something stupid.I should’ve known better. Should’ve never agreed to the shoot after finding out that anonymous69 was the same dude that made me look like a fucking fool in that goddamn bar. I stalked toward the elevator, head down, fists clenched. Just needed to get to my car. Get some air. Get away.“Excuse me?” a soft voice called.I looked up just as the elevator dinged open. The receptionist. Same girl who’d been eyeing me when I first walked in. Wide brown eyes, overly plumped lips, and a clipboard clutched to her chest like it was a damn shield.She rushed toward me, heels clicking too loud on the marble floor.“Sir—wait—are you okay? You look…”“I’m fine,” I snapped, not slowing my
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-04-05Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 8: That Scared The Hell Out Of Me
The drive home was quiet in that weird, unnatural way—like the world was holding its breath around me. Windows down, wind in my hair, cigarette smoke curling out into the dark. I let the radio hum low in the background, not really listening. Just static and soft rock and the occasional commercial trying to sell me shit I didn’t need.By the time I pulled into my building’s parking garage, my mood was dogshit. I parked, grabbed the grocery bag, and made a beeline for the front door.Of course, it didn’t help that I lived in a building full of friendly-ass neighbors.“Hey Captain!” some lady from the third floor waved, holding her dog like it was a damn toddler.I didn’t even glance her way. Just walked straight ahead, keys already in hand, boots hitting the pavement a little too hard.“Rough day?” some guy asked—pretty sure it was Steve. Or Stan. Or whatever.I ignored him too.I wasn’t in the mood for small talk or sympathy. I just wanted to get inside, lock the door, and forget Andre
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-04-06Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 9: Hollow
Morning rolled in like a lazy punch to the face.The kind of light that seeps through the blinds just enough to make you groan but not enough to actually feel like waking up. My mouth tasted like old smoke and my back ached from falling asleep half on my bedroom couch, half off it.I blinked slowly, adjusting to the soft glow filling the living room.I stretched out, groaning as my muscles cracked and popped like an old house settling, exhaustion tugging at my bones.Dragging myself upright, I sat there for a second, elbow on my knee, fingers pressed into my temple, letting the silence settle around me.And then I glanced in the mirror across the room.Damn. I looked like a goddamn mess.My hair was sticking up in three different directions. My lips were still a little swollen. A hickey—not fresh, not old—peeked out from the edge of my collarbone. And under my eyes, deep bruised shadows painted the kind of exhaustion that sleep couldn’t fix.But still... I still looked kind of hot.In
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-04-07Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 10: Visit To The Hospital
ANDREW PARKER ~ I walked through the sliding glass doors of St. Elora’s Hospital with a bouquet of pink carnations in one hand, my hoodie pulled up halfway because it was chilly, and my headphones still resting around my neck playing some mellow lo-fi beat. I wasn’t in a rush. I never was anymore. These visits had become so routine they almost felt like brushing my teeth in the morning. Something I had to do. Something automatic. Except it wasn’t just a chore — it was my lifeline to a world that still made sense. The lobby smelled like a weird mix of antiseptic and coffee. It always did. There was the faint beeping of machines somewhere in the distance and the soft murmur of nurses at the front desk. As soon as I stepped in, I caught the usual smiles. “Morning, Andrew!” the older receptionist, Sarah, called out with a cheerful wave. Her glasses were too big for her face and she always had a candy jar near her elbow. Today, it was filled with peppermint swirls. “Hey Sara
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-04-09
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Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 22: Dismantled Me
I woke up with my sheets twisted around my legs, one arm draped over my eyes like it could somehow block out the reality of the day ahead. But it was no use. I could feel it crawling under my skin the moment I blinked awake.Game day.Freshman team.Andrew.Fuck.I sat up slowly, groaning as my back cracked in three different places. My throat was dry as hell and my head throbbed with that low, dull ache that only came from too much alcohol. The air was chilly, but my skin was already prickling with leftover tension, like my body remembered something my brain hadn’t even caught up to yet.I rubbed at my face and stumbled out of bed. The sun was slicing through the blinds in sharp little stripes, hitting the floor like prison bars. Not a great metaphor, considering I felt like a goddamn hostage in my own brain lately.I took a quick shower, half-assed my grooming, and yanked on my gear. The jersey felt heavy today, like it was carrying more than just the weight of my number.I didn’t e
Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 21: Shitstorm Life
The morning after drinking never hits me soft.I woke up with my mouth dry as the damn desert, tongue heavy, head pounding in a rhythmic thud that felt like someone was using my skull as a fucking drum. My sheets were twisted up around me like I’d been in a fight with them. My arm was hanging off the bed, fingers barely grazing the empty bottle of water I must’ve dropped sometime in the middle of the night.I groaned, rolling over to bury my face into the pillow, hoping it’d just knock me out again. No such luck.I wasn’t even fully conscious yet, and I already hated everything.For a good ten minutes, I just laid there, eyes closed, brain foggy as hell, letting the weight of last night sink in. Me, drunk off my ass. James sitting across from me looking like I’d told him I was secretly a lizard person or some shit.The way his jaw dropped when I said the word OnlyFans still made me cringe. I hadn't meant to tell him. I hadn’t meant to say anything, really.But liquor loosens lips, and
Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 20: That Sounds... Really Gay
The bar wasn’t even that packed. Low lights, shitty country music humming from old wall speakers, and a few groups scattered around pretending their lives didn’t suck for a few hours. I should’ve been home. Shirt off, lights off, maybe filming something I would regret later for a quick confidence boost. But no. James, with his stupid grin and overly persuasive voice, somehow convinced me to get my ass out tonight.“You need a change of scenery, Cap,” he’d said. “Come on. Just a few drinks. Might even meet someone hot.”Right. Because nothing screams "emotional stability" like trying to flirt with strangers while my brain’s still locked on someone else's hands on my skin. Someone else's voice in my ear. Someone else's goddamn face.And now here I was. Elbow against the sticky bar top, drink number... shit, I’d lost count. Whiskey burned like a bitch going down, and I welcomed it.James had wandered off to talk to some girl earlier, but he came back eventually, dropping into the stool n
Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 19: I Hit Record
CAPTAIN ~I didn’t even feel the cold when I stormed out. Didn’t register the voices around me. It was all a blur. White noise.My pulse was roaring too loud in my ears.Slamming Andrew against the wall? Yeah, probably not my proudest moment. But the way he looked at me—like I was some stranger—set something off. My hand was still tingling from where I’d grabbed him. My chest felt too tight, like I couldn’t breathe properly. Each step I took was heavier than the last, like my feets were weighed down by the mess of emotions twisting in my gut.I rounded the corner and pushed open the side door, stepping into the biting afternoon air. It should’ve cleared my head but it didn’t.“Captain!”A hand grabbed my shoulder.I stopped mid-step, jaw clenched, stomach already dropping because I knew that voice.James.He was always too observant for his own damn good.“You alright?” he asked, voice low, cautious. Like I was some wild animal on the verge of snapping.And maybe I was.“No,” I almo
Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 18: what Changed?
ANDREW PARKER ~“Gush—!” I stumbled back, clutching the wall behind me like it could explain what the hell just happened. “That scared me…”The words barely made it out of my mouth. My heart was racing like it wanted out of my chest, lungs dragging air in like I’d been running for miles. My shoulder throbbed where he’d slammed me—his hand like a damn vice, fingers bunching up the fabric of my hoodie before shoving me hard into the concrete hallway wall like he owned the whole damn building.Captain.That psycho.I rubbed my shoulder, grimacing. His grip had left a phantom imprint, like his touch still clung there. I could almost feel the exact shape of his fingers through the layers of hoodie and t-shirt underneath.“What the fuck is wrong with that psycho?” I hissed under my breath, voice shaking with a mix of fear and fury. My hoodie was all stretched and twisted from where he grabbed it, so I yanked it back into place and patted it down like that would erase what just happened. My
Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 17: Let Go Of Me, Captain
There’s something about the sound of skates carving into fresh ice that always centers me. Cold, sharp air in my lungs, the hiss of movement, the dull roar of blades digging in. It’s therapy. I tugged on my helmet and rolled my shoulders, staring out at the rink as my team warmed up. The morning chill still clung to everything, misting from our mouths with every exhale, but inside my chest, it was a furnace. Burning slow. Uncomfortable.I kept my expression blank. Didn’t want to show it. Didn’t want to admit that I’d been looking forward to this practice for the worst reason—because I knew he’d be there.Yeah. Andrew.Pretty boy. Fuckboy. Muse. Mistake. Whatever the hell you wanna label it.I spotted him immediately when I stepped on the ice. Like my brain had a built-in radar that beeped hot whenever he was within fifty feet. He was on the far side, helmet off, smiling at something one of the rookies said. That lazy smile. And then I noticed something else.He wasn’t looking at me.
Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 16: Out Of My Head
The gym bathroom smelled like cheap soap. I stepped into the tiled space, peeling off my sweat-drenched hoodie with a grunt. My shirt clung to me like a second skin—sticky and soaked—and honestly, stripping out of it felt like shedding another layer of frustration. I caught my reflection in the mirror for half a second. Hair damp with sweat, chest heaving, jaw tight. Damn, I thought, smirking faintly. Still got it though. I kicked off my sneakers, yanked down my shorts and boxers, and made my way to the open showers. The spray was lukewarm at best, but I didn’t care. Water thundered against my skin, rinsing off the salt and the anger and the ache in my thighs. I just stood there for a minute, eyes closed, letting it all pour over me. Steam fogged up the mirrors and the edges of my brain. My thoughts were quiet for once. Or… mostly quiet. Because even when I wasn’t thinking about him on purpose, my brain had a way of dragging Andrew back in. The way his hand had fit against my sid
Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 15: Just Plain Irritated
I woke up annoyed.Not tired. Not groggy. Just plain irritated.I hadn’t even opened both eyes and I already wanted to punch something. The memory of James’ message sat in my chest like a rock—Coach’s thinking of benching you. Just a heads-up. Yeah, dude. thanks for the fucking heads-up. I lay there for a few seconds, eyes staring at the ceiling, muscles coiled tight under the blanket like a spring. The morning light was spilling through the half-closed blinds, striping my wall in pale gold. It looked peaceful. Calm.Too bad I wasn’t either of those things.I dragged a hand down my face and exhaled sharply. Screw it. I wasn’t gonna just lie here and stew. I needed to to burn it out of my system before it started eating holes in my head.Gym.That was the only plan.I tossed the blanket off and swung my legs over the side of the bed. My body was still warm from sleep, muscles loose, skin slightly tacky with sweat. I stood up and rolled my neck, stretching both arms high until I hea
Breaking The Ice Between Us CHAPTER 14: Officially Ruined
There’s just something about a hot bath at the end of a long-ass day that hits different. The kind of hot where your muscles stop screaming and start sighing instead. The kind of hot that makes it feel like all the bullshit—every sharp word, every look you shouldn’t have cared about, every ghost of a touch—is finally melting off your skin.I filled the tub damn near to the top, dumped in a ridiculous amount of eucalyptus salts I found shoved in the back of the cabinet, and didn’t even care that the smell made me feel like I was about to be sacrificed in some new-age forest ceremony.Whatever. It was nice.I slid in slowly, hissing as the heat kissed up my legs, then my hips, then finally sank into my bones. I let my head fall back against the cool edge of the tub and shut my eyes.“Holy shit,” I muttered, already feeling half human again.Steam curled around my face, humid and heavy. The room blurred. My limbs floated. The tension I’d been clinging to all day—the weight in my shoulder
