— Of course not! I think it's the first challenge as an actor, and as a person, to learn how to deal with someone like the Lord looking intimidating, but sometimes it gets tiresome!
— You are my brother, and you have inherited my courage..."
— How is it? Did I inherit your courage? Did you forget that I'm older?
— I don't see much. You may have been born two years before me, but it's a fact that hierarchy doesn't exist between us, right?
— You clown! You don't respect me, I think I gave you too much space, that's right! — I go, and throw a pillow at her again.
— Oh, do you want to kill me?— fwing and smile. — But back to the subject. Why does he act this way?
— I do not know. I didn't do anything for him, and I'm just ignored...
— Did he not like having to play with you, and wanted someone famous to be Wanchai? Or his millionaire playboy fame got to him, and he must be thinking you bought the spot...
— Lyn, none of these alternatives make sense! I don't know what his problem is, I know I need to study even more to give my best to this character. You know the book's fandom has hated me until my other life, and if P'Nate is dissatisfied, he's the one who covers the direction.
[...]
I really needed to do my best to live in Wanchai, and my initial mission was to win P”Nate, that is, to win his trust, so that together we could develop good work. So, I invited him to something different this time, because I found out he likes football, so I invited him to play a game with some friends of mine. We talked very little before departure. As soon as it was over, I took a shower, and waited for him. I needed to invite him to dinner, so I would have something to talk about: Football.
I said goodbye to my friends, and sat on a bench facing the bathroom on the block. It takes a while, and I see him. I don't know what happens, I try my best not to look, but something is stronger than me. Too weird. I look hypnotized. What's happening? There's nothing wrong with him, wearing jeans and a European team jersey, his hair wet, falling into his eyes. He sits next to me, and I hope he hasn't noticed my curious gaze. Honestly, I'm not know myself. I keep watching as he puts on his shoe, and as if I have nothing to do with my life, I start to notice a drop of water running from his hair, running all over his face. Definitely what's up with me?
— Will you be looking at me all the time? — His speech surprises me, and I need something to talk about, to get me out of this jam.
— Sorry! It's just... I was looking at your shirt, it looks old...
— Oh, was that it? It's old, I bought it from a collector on the internet, and from the time of Real Madrid's Galacticos...
— Ah understood! — I've never heard of the galactics, but that's ok. — And this Ronaldo, wasn't his number 7?
— No. This is another Ronaldo, he's Brazilian. He was world cup champion with the Brazilian team, an incredible player!
Our conversation continued in the restaurant, and for the first time I managed to get a few sentences out of his mouth, and even smiles. When it came to football and music, sir, look intimidating, talks non-stop, we talked for hours, and I felt satisfied with my mission. If I keep persevering I will be able to create the least amount of intimacy with him.
[...]
The weeks passed quickly, and during this period I had the opportunity to get a little closer to my scene partner. We did a lot of activities together, including studying the text with and without the cast. It was important to realize that P'Nate is extremely professional in everything, to see how dedicated he is, and how much he helped me to understand Wanchai even more, it was gratifying.
The first day of recording has arrived. Exactly, the shooting of the scenes from the first trailer, and with it, a lot of concerns, not just with the scenes, but with my parents. This trailer would be limited to Youtube, but if my parents saw it, it would be chaos, and I would have to face them. As soon as the first day is over, I walk slowly through the hallways that lead to the main studio, and a few colleagues pass by and say their goodbyes as I drag myself along. My thoughts are on my family, and on the drama far greater than those we watched on Boyslove, until I heard someone call my name, and I was snapped out of my trance.
— Will, wait!
I look toward the voice behind me. I stop, and wait for him to approach, still wearing his regular college student attire, the look isn't intimidating, but there's something that makes me a little uncomfortable, I don't know why I'm thinking something like that, but his lips are so kissable, it's hard to look at him and not think about it. What? Why am I thinking about something like this? Finally he approaches, looks at me shyly, what's up with him?
— Will, I need to pass the text Will you be available tomorrow afternoon? Since we have the day off...
— All right, I can. I have class at the college in the morning, and as soon as I drop, I can meet you.
He nodded his head in the affirmative, and said goodbye. Something was different, normally he's not like that. What am I thinking? It's like I've known him for decades!
[...]
When we first met he barely looked at me, and today he texted me his address, I can't understand him. In front of his apartment door, I take a deep breath, ring the bell and it doesn't take long for it to open.
— Hi, come in. — speak, effaz signal for you to follow him. I close the door behind me. I quickly observe the space around me, everything so white, wall, sofa.
We went through the text several times, but every time I suggested the first date scene, he would get nervous, or feign dementia, and tell us to skip it and save it for last. But we need to study it. As soon as he comes back from the bathroom, I question him.
— P'Nate, why don't we just do the missing scene?
— Why don't you stop calling me that?
— And what should I call him?
— Nate. — on hearing this I confess that I was a little surprised, he considers me so much to allow me not to use the P'? — Is well Will, but still missing the scenes of the second episode.
I know, but this is the first date thing. It is the first contact between Wanchai and Thirasak, we need to get some things right, movements, looks and our Talk... Everything went well. — his look and tone of voice do not seem very happy.
We walk away, I approach him and face him. I try to show a strange feeling, confused when looking directly into your eyes, is what the text asks for. I open and close my mouth as if I were to say something, but the words don't come out. He looks at me intensely for a moment, but lowers his gaze and turns his face to the side. I don't understand. Our script does not ask for this, but I think we should follow. Nate turns his back on and walks, I call him, or rather, Wanchai does it.
— Thirasak. — That's the moment he just pretends he doesn't care about the Wanchai calling out to him. But my character doesn't get tired. — You fool!
He turns around, stares at me angrily. Walk to me. It's very close.
— And I…
I feel extremely nervous about the way you look at me.
— What is it? Speak up, I'm in a hurry. He says, and I continue to stutter, looking around, until he blurts out the sentence that makes my heart race fast.
— Keep looking at me like that, and I'll kiss you until you go crazy!
Will“Keep looking at me like that, and I'll kiss you until you're crazy.”I feel great discomfort when I hear this. The feeling would be Wanchai's, but I'm the one who feels it. But why? What's with me? My discomfort is visible as Nate gives me a strange look, looks confused.— Will, are you all right?— I'm... It's all right!— Do you think this tone is okay? — I know we will have a rehearsal before recording, with the cast, but...He keeps talking. I can't face it. I sit on the couch and leaf through the notebook in my hand. I need to compose myself. What's up, Will? You are not Wanchai, and this
Will“ I've wanted it since the day I laid eyes on you.It doesn't take long for me to take your lips to myself. It feels weird, well, I don't know how to describe it, the only thing I know is that I feel light. Your lips are so soft. I suck on his lower lip with a desire I don't know, as I wrap my hands around his neck, and at the same time I feel his hands play with my hair. The kiss intensifies, and he presses my body between the door, behind me, his hand that was playing with my hair goes down my waist, and... Suddenly I feel someone hitting my shoulder hard.— Will, wake up! I want to borrow that yellow watch...I open my
WillI couldn't come up with a plausible lie to convince Nate that he couldn't meet my "mother-in-law". So at the appointed time, there I was, in front of his door, holding a bottle of French wine on one side and insecurity on the other. Before I ring the doorbell, the door is opened by a woman apparently middle-aged, with shoulder-length hair, round face and slanted eyes like mine. She smiles happily at me.— You're punctual, I'm glad you came!— Thank you! I brought this wine, I don't know if you like it...Nate 's mom invites me in, and makes me extremely comfortable. She is so cheerful, affectionate, it's no wonder he talks about her t
WillI take a deep breath as I lay my head on my pillow. My night was intense. It started with an amusing moment during dinner, and ended with a very unpleasant situation in Nate 's room .“What's going on here ?”, that sentence sounded so accusatory, as if we were doing something very bad. Okay, that I was caressing your face, but I guess friends can do that, or can't they? I know I felt an overwhelming urge to kiss him, but I didn't. The problem is that we were surprised by someone I didn't know was still a part of his life. Your girlfriend.Her presence took us by surprise, I quickly removed my hand that was caressing his face, and we both sat on the bed, the girl looked enraged, bu
WillDuring the rest of the day we shot a lot of scenes, we had a few breaks, but Nate didn't say anything else about what we talked about, or what was causing the fuss. So I thought it best to leave it all alone.Confused, confused, confused. That word doesn't get out of my head, as soon as the day's recording ends, everyone heads to the parking lot, I say goodbye to everyone, and I stare at Nate who looks at me in a strange way, he seemed to want to tell me something. I turned around and opened the car, and I heard his voice from the other side of the vehicle.— Will, can you give me a ride? — His request takes me by surprise
WillWhat I find when I look at him is nothing but sweetness. I watch her mouth closely and an uncontrollable urge to taste her takes over me. His lips look very kissable to my eyes, extremely inviting. Will, you need to control this insane desire, you are not Wanchai, and he is not Thirasak. I can't, it's stronger than me, I approach him a little, shortening the small distance between us even more, he continues to stare at me as if he's been waiting for me. I bring my face closer to his, and before I take any action, my phone rings.I reach into my pocket for it, and Nate quickly unbuckles the belt. I look at the viewer, “my father”. Before I say a word, he steps forward.—
WillI argued with my sister over her insistence that I'm in denial. I spent the night thinking about what he said, and I came to the conclusion that I was an idiot in the past, and out of fear I didn't experience that "possible relationship" during the end of high school. But and now? How do I feel about my co-star? Is it just enthusiasm? Is it the closeness that makes me think of Nate differently?I don't know what I feel for him, but I know that being by his side makes me very happy. Every time I make him smile, it makes me feel light. Hearing his voice telling funny situations from his life while having dinner is perfect. I observe every detail of her face that makes me enchanted, her eyes are an intense brown, and they look at me with an expression of happiness. He smiles when he hears me say any nonsense, and it infects me, sometim
Will— What? Did you dream about me?— Did I say that? It's not me...— You did, but… — Before I finish my sentence, his phone goes dead, and that unbearable sound echoes in my ear. There's no way Nate could have hung up the phone in my face!I really can't believe he did that. Tried calling back but the phone seems to be off, won't ring. If I was already shaken, I was even more so after his confessions. What does he want? Drive me crazy or something? He said he dreamed of me, and maybe he was embarrassed by what he said, or by the dream?
WillHis arms squeeze me even tighter, I wrap mine around his neck, while my tongue meets his. All these days without any contact have made me sad and moody. His hands begin a pleasant play on my back, moving up and down my back, caressing me and making me want to surrender to the moment even more. Our kiss is hungry. I want to devour his mouth, and he wants the same, and his body gently pushes mine somewhere, until I feel the wall behind me. My body is pressed together in a way that I know where we will be in a few minutes, especially if we keep kissing like this, we will both be hard.I stop the kiss, and push him away slightly, because Nate doesn't want to let go. I meet his confused gaze.— What is it, love? Don't you want to?— Of course I want to!— So, what is the problem?— Where will we do it? On the ground?— Of course not!— Another thing, whose house is this? Relax... This room has nothing, but the one next door has a great bed, an amazing bathroom with a tu
WillLyn's screams startle me, I look toward the house, and it is still dark. I hurry my steps and arrive in front of the door. My hand touches the doorknob, I turn it, and it opens. I enter the house. I turn on the flashlight on my cell phone, look around hoping to find a light switch, and to my surprise I find one near the door, I touch it and the light goes on. I call out to my sister, but get no answer from her, my heart squeezes, and a slight chill passes through my stomach. I look around me, at what seems to be a small entrance hall. There is a large staircase with golden handrails, and in front of me a wide, glazed door. I open it, and once again look for a switch. When I finally manage to find it, along with the glow of the lamp comes the surprise, the room appears to be a living room. Its white walls, a large chandelier in the center of the room, but there is not a single piece of furniture in the entire space. I begin to think that my sister might be fooling me, or wors
WillThe days have dragged on, and I still haven't spoken to Nate. Today, Valentine's Day, we could be somewhere enjoying our company, but my boyfriend will be pretending to be a couple with an actress, to promote a series that has no audience. I may be being selfish, I know that, but I would never submit to this for the sake of work, I feel extremely frustrated. My mind feels like it is going to explode from thinking about it all the time. I stare at Lyn, sitting in front of me in the restaurant, she watches me intently, runs her hand under her hair, puts her elbow on the table, does the thinker's position, and speaks.— What did you come here for?— Dinner!— It doesn't look like it, you stare at nothing, and you haven't even touched your plate!— I will eat, don't worry!— Why don't you send him a message? Schedule something after he leaves the live?— No, because there's no way he could see my message, by now the live broadcast has already started, and I don't want to talk to
WillIf there is one thing I understand in our profession, it is the advertising that is done to promote a series, but I don't like this new job of Nate's because of our manager's insistence on something that didn't work out. Sometimes it crosses my mind that somehow he doesn't accept our relationship, and that's why he insists so much that we can't be seen together. I know that all this could be just jealousy on my part, something I try not to develop, especially in relation to work, but lately it has become unavoidable, and I don't like to see my boyfriend with Lily.Hearing him say about faking a dating that doesn't exist makes me uncomfortable, and I don't know what to say, I just watch as he hangs up the phone and looks at me waiting for something.— Did you hear it? — he asks and I just shake my head. I get up, walk to the closet, grab some clothes, put them on, and go back to the bedroom. — Can we talk?— Talk? What for?— Will, do you understand that I can't do a
EpilogueWill— Didn't you do it because you didn't mean it? You don't even watch the Lakorn to support me, you don't comment on your social networks, you're not helping me engage!— Nate, what do you want me to do? The story is bad, it's toxic, nobody wants to watch it, and besides, Lily is not a good actress, and the couple you make in this series is horrible, with no chemistry!— Wow, how supportive my boyfriend is!— It's true, and I told you not to embark on this idea, but you didn't listen and thought it would be a success!— Is it the truth, or are you just dying of jealousy?— Me? Jealous of you? Stop being cocky, Nate!— You are jealous, yes!— I am not jealous, and I warned you about this project, but you insisted because you listened to our manager.— I know, but it would be a great opportunity to be in prime time on broadcast TV, and...— We got more audience when we acted in Fake D8, it was not in prime time, and...— What do you mean, Will?— I mean that w
EpilogueWillI didn't know how to cry, that is, I was raised thinking that I couldn't shed a tear, and that it was synonymous with weakness for a man. However, I created so many uncertainties about my life, and I hid myself inside a tight closet, pretending to be someone I wasn't, to quiet my parents' hearts, and with that I lived stuck without being able to do what I really wanted to do, to be the real Will. The one who wanted to act, dance, cry, and love a man.Almost three years ago I met a guy who helped me to change this story. I confess that it was not easy at all, and in the beginning I thought he was an arrogant, intimidating guy who had an image of a sexy straight boy who is always going out with thousands of girls, at least that's what I believed, however, the sexy straight boy fell in love with the real Will, the one who before couldn't cry. The two started to find out who they really were, what they felt for each other, and this feeling became intense for both of them.
WillNate has been calling me the whole time to see if I was on my way, I'm starting to get nervous. It started when I was at my grandfather's house talking to Sunee and Lyn, and even they were worried. During the ride to his house, and now as I park in the garage of the building, he calls once again to find out where I am. The elevator takes three minutes to get to his floor, but for me it is an eternity.I put in the key, turn the knob, and finally open the door. The room is dark, and I can just make out the light coming from the next room, the dining room. I turn on the light and call for him, who answers me. I walk there, and find a table set for dinner, with Chinese food, my favorite, and Nate sitting waiting for me.— Wow, are we celebrating something?— We are... But first you are going to wash your hands, come on!— Do you have to be rude, you pain in the ass? — I complain in my sly voice. — You like it rough, that I know! — he answers in a ma
WillNate is a box of surprises. After we spent that period apart, he has surprised me a lot, I feel that he is more confident about the emotional problems caused by the negative fame that comes from social networks, and this makes me calm, if he is happy, I am happy. His confidence, and the way he acts has impressed me, and when he brought me to this locker room with the intention of fulfilling a sexual fantasy, it really surprised me, I did not expect such an attitude from him.When I think back to the beginning, the first contacts, the denial on both sides, the first kiss, the flirtatious moments until the proposal, the breaking of sex as a taboo (read on his part), and the long awaited first time. It was a long path, but a very pleasant one, and I would walk it again without a second thought.— What are you going to do to me, Kitten? Or should I call you Daddy? — when I ask, he looks at me with such desire, and my reaction before he says anything is to lightly bite his lower
NateRecording continues, and I confess that it is a little difficult to dissociate fiction from reality. Every scene in which I must show my love, care, and attention is all too real when I view it after the director has finished recording. I'm starting to notice that everyone realizes this, how much this love has connected us in a surreal way, and with every scene we shoot, photos, ads, everything we develop together, this has become clearer, and the fandom of the ship has gone crazy for any of our posts, especially those where we combine phrases, or pretend to be far away, when we are actually next to each other.As I invite him to come to the court with me, to play with my friends, I remember the first time he came, got hurt, and insinuated that we could do something more in the locker room. Unfortunately that was another time, I was just beginning to accept the fact that I was in love and dating a man, and sex was a taboo for me. If his insinuation were made today, I w