PrologueLilly's POVToday is the day.You know, the day.The one I was waiting for since I accidentally opened an - ahem - a very restricted webpage. It was an accident. I swear. It's not like I was seven years old, searching on my iPad, "Where do babies come from?" after my dad told me that he picked me up from Walmart and is planning on returning me back.It's not like my mother told me that babies come after you hug someone and I went around my school hugging every boy in sight but never got pregnant. It's not like that at all.Okay. Maybe it was exactly like that.What can I say, I was a curious kid. When I wanted answers, I went around searching everywhere till I found them.My first thought was that babies came from amazon. I remember asking Alexa to order me a baby. I think my question confused her because right the next day, she broke down. I try to think of it as an accident, last thing I want is a machine-killing guilt on my conscious. Anyway, I knew I had to depend on myse
Lilly's POVThe aching in my skull ebbs and flows like a cold tide. Pain pulses through every nerve in my body and I moan as I feel both hot and cold. I've been laying in my bed for the last two hours, wide awake, eyes closed and totally dehydrated.Now, I understand why they call it a hangover, for it feels as if the blackest of clouds are over my head with no intention of clearing until late afternoon.I groan and wrap myself in the duvet, waves of nausea adding to my misery. My phone pings with a message after another, but I care less to check it.My brain feels like it would swell beyond the capacity of my skull and now my dehydration is too obvious to ignore.Perhaps some painkillers would help.I raise my heavy eyelids half way only for them to fall shut. I groan as I raise them again and swing my bare feet to the cold floor.I yawn and brush the hair covering my face away. My first instinct kicks me to check my phone but once my hand reach out for it, I notice the small box lay
Lilly's POV"What are you talking about?" He asked, his tone steady, and his words measured. The disoriented emotions that swirled his eyes seconds ago suddenly faded into nothing.Anger clenched my jaw and I grated out, "I heard everything," My eyebrow arched in accusation, "Zack wanted to ask me out before but you," I pointed at him, "You stopped him, why is that?"I thought my question would clear out that blank look but instead, he shrugged...he simply shrugged.I groaned in annoyance at his lack of reaction and my hand reached to the neck of his shirt, grabbing it, I pulled him down. His eyes grew wide a bit, shocked at the gesture, "Why do you always interfere in my life like that?" I hissed in his face.His hand came to mine and gently untangled my fingers from over the fabric. He pulled it away but didn't let it go, "We are not kids anymore, okay?" I snapped while he kept silent, "You can't just steal my things when I break your toys," I sarcastically remarked, "That's not how
One week later...Lilly's POV"Is that a hickey?"My eyes widened and my heart dropped ten feet under the ground at the sudden question -- that most probably is directed at me.Swallowing hard, I rested my pen over the notebook and lifted my head up. Pulling the most casual look I could master, I looked Aylin in the eye and shook my head, "Oh no, Max and I were fighting as usual," I mumbled as I nervously rubbed at my neck.It's been a week since - ahem - my make-out session with that specific someone. The stupid hickey is fading, but still, it left a small mark, and the concealer probably wore off. Damn it.Aylin's eyebrow raised in question, not satisfied at my answer. My eyes drifted to Chase sitting across me, his eyes supposedly focused on the book ahead of him, a smile threatening to break through his features. He ran his thumb over his lower lip, hiding it.My jaw tightened and I kicked him in the shin from under the table. It's all his freaking fault. He lifted his head up, hi
"Dear heart,Don't fear what makes you feel."****************Lilly's POVI peeked from over the book in my hands to sneak a look at the guy sitting across of me. He had his elbow pressed over the armrest of the chair, the side of his face pressed against his palm, his eyes focused on the book placed over his lap.I took into a shaky breath and let my eyes drift back to the book in my hands. One advantage of being stuck in a library; the endless supply of books.Without thinking, my eyes lifted up again and fell on him, still way too engrossed in his book. One of the disadvantages of being stuck in a library; Me shamelessly checking out Chase with every passing second.His tongue darted out to lick his lips and I had to force myself not to eye its movement. Shit. I am in trouble, big big trouble. For the first time ever, I have slept by his side, no, not just that, I was wrapped up between his arms...that's how I woke up. The thought alone made my stomach flip, either butterflies or
Lilly's POVThe possibility of us was enough to knock the breath from my lungs.In a span of seconds only, I saw how the future might play out if we take this risk. I saw us, together, figuring whatever the hell this is out. I saw this growing, I saw us getting attached. But then, I saw that inevitable end. I saw how this would only end in heartbreak and the worst part is, it may not be me the one who'll get hurt.Before I could let the words part my lips, the loud clicking sound of a door echoed in the empty library and I gasped, taken aback. My body jerked up and the sounds became louder, heavy footsteps, some chattering, and people talking.My heart knocked it up a notch and I staggered backward till my back came in contact with Chase's front. His arm went around my body, his hand wrapped around my forearm in reassurance. My gaze lifted up to him and I breathed out, my heart dropped into my stomach trying to figure out if we're being saved or maybe not...My eyes squinted when sudd
Chase's POVI sucked into a deep breath as I stared at my reflection in the mirror. Water dripped down from the strands of my hair into the side of my forehead as I splashed more into my face. Fighting through the thousand thoughts roaming up my head, air pushed harshly out of my lungs and I drove my hand through my hair.I dried my face and went back to my room. I pulled the semi-wet T-shirt over my head and threw it into the laundry basket. As I slipped another one over my head, I heard the door opening. I immediately turned around and...there she was.Her eyes traveled down my stomach then up again as I fixed my shirt. She licked her lips, "Um, not sorry." She said, trying so hard to hide a smile before she leisurely made her way into the room like she owned it.My eyes followed her as she sat on my bed's edge, her palms pressed over the mattress and her eyes met mine again, "Whatcha ya doin?" She asked, her tone cheerful."Why you're here?" I purposely ran away from her and now he
Lilly's POVMy heart did that crazy thing again, pulsing with an unfamiliar newly-acquired affection toward the guy standing right ahead of me.As much as I wanted to break free from the shackles binding me to him since that day, I couldn't. My gaze locked on the boy who held a very special place in my heart. There was no denying how much Chase meant to me. I mean, we practically grew up together.It wasn't till recently that I started to see him more than that. More than a friend, more than family. He is becoming something else. Something more... but still unknown and undefined. And as any other human being I am scared of the unknown. More like terrified.My eyes caught the few drops of water that made their way down from the light strands of his hair to the side of his temple. I couldn't help the heartfelt smile sneaking up my face as I took in the whole situation we got ourselves into.In that exact same moment, a smile of his own curved his beautiful lips, reflecting my own. His s
The hardness of his voice and his touch had my wide eyes drifting from my hand that I couldn't move then back to his face, "Christian, you are scaring me," I said, my voice low as I tried to break my arm free of his grip."You're scared?" He scoffed, "You have no idea what real fear feels like, Lilly," The look of pure disgust in his eyes had me gulping down, "Fear is opening the door to see your father's body there, killed in the most inhuman way," My stomach churned at the thought and he added, his voice and rage increasing with each word, "Fear is waking up after one hell of an explosion and not being able to move, for five hours, I couldn't move a muscle as I watched all of my friends there die because your fucking family thought that killing one man was worth burning up the whole damn asylum!"Asylum...explosion...the newspaper I just saw."My family?" I asked, weakly, nothing making sense, nothing.He nodded, "Yes, Lilly, your family," He said, "You see, it took everything in my
The second I opened the door for her, she shot out, "What did he do?" She asked and anger reflected off her eyes, already expecting that he did something.I ushered her to get inside and we sat down as I explained what happened and what he said at the end before he stormed out."Okay, I am gonna tell you something, Lilly," Sally started, her tone very serious, "Something that shows how everything about the way he dealt with this is very wrong."I nodded and she swallowed down hard, preparing herself before she said, "Conner and I kind of had a thing going on," She confessed and I wasn't surprised, "I know, it was kind of obvious, you guys were talking every day."She shook her head, "It's not like that, the summer before he left to uni, one time we were alone and one thing led to another and well," She gave me a knowing look, "We slept together."My eyes grew wide a bit, "Why didn't you tell me?" I asked."Chase had just left and you were not okay, and also Conner and I decided to not
One year later...Lilly's POVI am panicking.So very much panicking.I am in trouble. Big stupid trouble.Fuck.How could I be so damn stupid?My pulse took off a sprint as I stared down at the birth control pack, to see three pills are still left. I am supposed to have finished them all by today, twenty-eight days passed, twenty-eight pills, but no, three are left, which means...Fuck, how did I forget to take it three days in a row?Three freaking days!Jesus, Lilly, how could you be so stupid?I didn't even notice it when it happened.I pulled my phone and with my hand shaking, I checked the calendar, my mind calculating and trying to remember when this must've happened. It had to be about ten days ago, I had my exams and my graduation project presentation, I was so stressed. I usually take the pill first thing in the morning, considering I wasn't sleeping well during that time, I probably just forgot to take them.I am supposed to get my period in the following days, but what if I
****************One month later...Chase's POV"You think your dad will accept to be my reference?" Conner asked for the umpteenth time, "I mean I know that he loves me a lot," He added proudly, "You know that he once told me I am like the son he never had."I lowered my shades and turned around, giving him the most unimpressed look. He just rolled his eyes, "Anyways, I really need his reference, this company I am applying for is really big news, if I get accepted, I would do anything you want," The security pressed the card, allowing us to walk inside and I gave him a thank-you nod, "I might even kiss you from happiness."I winced at his words, "No, thank you."He narrowed his eyes at me before we walked into the elevator, "Uh, do you know that..." Conner cleared his throat, "That Lilly is here in LA for the summer?"I looked at him and nodded, "Yeah, my mother mentioned it the other day."His eyebrows pulled closer, as if expecting a bigger reaction, "Do you plan on seeing her?"I
************Lilly' POVHis words had me snapping and I walked out of my hiding, unable to take it anymore.My words had him leaving Christian and turning around, his eyes wide as they fell on me, "Lilly, what the hell are you doing here?" He snapped.I ignored his question and walked forward, "You want to tell the department about him, okay do it, but be sure that I will go and say it's me," I said, "If you're gonna drag his reputation down, you will be dragging mine along with it."I shook my head, "I am not gonna let you do that," I said, "Because, it's my life, whether I am gonna be with him or not, it's my decision and you can't...you just can't keep controlling my life forever!""Lilly, you are driving me insane, what you are doing is wrong, so do-""No, it is not wrong!"Anger and hurt clouded my chest at the way he's dealing with this, "Christian loves me and I love him as well, there is nothing wrong with that!"Dad looked taken aback, so did Christian and that's when I realiz
Lilly's POV"Dad, why did you do that!" I snapped as I rushed forward toward Christian, unable to comprehend what just happened.I expected his anger, but not his violence toward this.Christian whipped the blood from the side of his mouth before his eyes fell back on my dad, the muscles of his jaw worked, "I get how this looks like," He said, taking a step forward toward dad and I pulled at his sleeves as not to get close again, "But I am serious about everything that concerns your daughter."Dad's anger seemed to only multiply, "Serious you say?" He grated out in mockery and pointed at the door, "Get the fuck out of here and stay the hell away from her, or else your jaw isn't the only thing I will be breaking."I felt Christian is about to talk again and defend his intentions, but I pulled at his arm, stopping him, or else dad really won't stop, "Christian, just go," I urged and when his eye fell on me, I silently begged him to leave.I swallowed hard and nodded, silently telling hi
Monday"I should head out now," I said as I took the last sip of my martini and placed it down."Oh come on, it's your birthday, stay a bit late," Sally whined, and I only shook my head in return. I checked the time and calculated the time difference between us and LA, "I should head back home, I've got a pretty important call to make.""It's Mr. boyfriend, isn't it?" Sally asked, purposely not mentioning his name in front of our other friends, "I mean you were with him all over the past week," She scoffed, very annoyed, "You already celebrated together, today is supposed to be only ours!"Since I've already celebrated my birthday with Christian, tonight I agreed to Sally's proposition to go out and have some fun, with some of our other girl-friends from class, who also brought their boyfriends. I also asked Noah to join us, so we were not a very little group at the moment.I shook my head, gathering my things into my purse, "It's not Christian," I hissed at her, so no one else would
*****************After Christian took his shower, we went to bed, and almost immediately he fell asleep. He's been working really hard all over the past week, he was pulling on late hours at night to finish working on his project, even tomorrow which is Sunday, he will go to the university, to finish up a few things before his big presentation on Monday comes.So, the moment he placed his head on the pillow, he was a gone case.Me, on the other hand, I couldn't sleep at all. I kept thinking back to today's little incident, something just felt off, but for the love of me, I can't figure it out.Minutes and minutes later and a low groan vibrated from my chest, annoyed at my tired body that won't just rest and sleep.My back was to Christian, pressed right up against his chest and his arm was under me. I smiled again when I stared at his tattoo and finally understood the word written, but still on the inside of his arm and around the word laid different patterns, intertwined together an
Six months later...Lilly's POVI was close. So close.Wind whipped through around me, hot and hard, the sun blazing down from over-head. I increased my grip on the throttle, ticking it back a little more as I eased into the endpoint of the trackway. The engine warbled deep as I set a cautious but still a fast pace.An unstoppable smile crawled up my lips as I took a turn and halted the bike to a stop where everyone else was waiting for us. Adrenaline still pumped into my veins as I climbed off and took the helmet from over my head.I leaned against the bike and crossed my arms over my chest as I waited for Louis, who a minute later arrived with his bike. My eyebrow raised when he went off and shot me a hard glare, "This didn't just happen!""You mean me beating you?" I questioned proudly, "Oh yeah, I think it did."He looked around in frustration, "How in the hell-?" He rushed a hand over his face, "I can't believe this."Christian chuckled, pretty much impressed as he walked closer