At the night of the party...Chase's POVI walked out into the dark cold night. Air heaved in and out of my lungs, jagged and coarse. A growl rumbled at the base of my throat. I hated every fucking miserable second of this day.All I wanted was to walk back inside and pull him away from her and let all of my rage explode into his face. I didn't care if I'd make a scene, I didn't care that he is my cousin and friend. All I wanted is a release to the anger flaming inside my chest.But I stopped myself and pressed my palm over the car's window. Unable to open it and go, and unable to stay.The cold January air didn't affect me at all. It felt like I was burning up from the inside out.And soon, all will be left would be ashes.Guess that's what happens when you play with fire.I burned.I gambled and lost.I knew it was a risk, she was a risk, but I took it. I thought she'd be worth it.I unbuttoned the first few buttons of my shirt and rubbed at my chest, trying to blunt the ache inside
Lilly's POVMy heart clenched so tight as he muttered those couple of words and walked away. Hurt wrapped me up from the inside out and I slammed my back against the locker, trying to hold into anything so I wouldn't just collapse into a million piece.It was pathetic.I couldn't stop my tears. My own self taunting me. I felt so pathetic at my current vulnerable state.How did I reach here? How did I let myself open up for him? Why did I ever take that risk?I knew it. From the beginning, I knew it would only end in heartbreak, but I couldn't stop myself.Now, I learned my lesson.With my hand, I harshly wiped the tears from over my cheek away. I am not going to cry over him. I am not going to cry at all. I am not weak. I will easily get over this. I have to.I felt Zack's hand palm the side of my arm, "Hey, you okay?" He asked.When I turned to him, I noticed the bit of blood gathering around the corner of his mouth from Chase's punch. My eyebrows pulled together, "I am sorry," I mum
One month later...Lilly's POVOne month has passed since that day.The day I had my heart broken for the first time. The day I lost someone so dear to me, and the day I cried my eyes out for the last time.I didn't shed a single tear after that day. I didn't give myself the chance to break down. I gathered myself and moved on, lived each day, one at a time.Everyone tells me that I've changed. Even my parents have noticed it. I focused only on my exams and classes. I started preparing for university, searching for the suitable options and checking every oppurtunity presented. True, more than a whole year still seperates me from that part of my life, but I want to be ready, I want to have the next years of my life all planned out.I haven't talked with Chase at all after that day. I haven't stepped into their house, I always made excuses so I wouldn't accompany my parents. He never came back to our place either, I am beyond grateful for that.We no longer hang out, neither at school n
Lilly's POVAt that realization, I felt myself backing away, escaping, shocked at my own thoughts.The tremor coursing through my heart reminded me of the reason why I was always so scared of this, of him, of the possibility of us and what it could do.The music stopped and the magic that enveloped the room ever so slowly started to fade away. I immediately wiped away the traitor tear and tried to recover from the drastic beauty of that moment."That was great!" I heard Mrs. Garcia's voice, she clapped her hands and came into view just now. Laying her fingers over the piano, she let out a dreamy sigh, "It's exactly what I need for this play, it's perfect!"Chase got to his feet and she immediately asked, "So, will you offer up this perfect talent of yours for our play?"He smiled and nodded, "Yeah, sure."Her smile widened and her eyes shone with gratefulness. Her gaze left Chase and fell on me behind him, "Oh Lilly, you're just on time, come on let's discuss-" I silenced the rest of
Lilly's POVA tangle of emotions surged through me. Mainly it was pain and guilt, but simmering beneath all of that was something that felt achingly...good.I still refused to acknowledge it.My heart sped as the feelings I've kept down all these days clawed through my veins and pounded in my ears. His words punching their way through as I tried to drink in the feedback of everything that is being said.I shook my head, "No," I shook it again, unable to accept the whole situation, "No, no, you don't get to say that now, no, you can't!" My voice raised in bewilderment, "You can't come now and throw that past in my face, you don't get to make me feel guilty, you don't!""You don't get to make me wonder what could've been if I wasn't so damn blind!" I really was so clueless, mistaking every move he ever did, every action and every word as a gesture of us being just friends, family...That's all I ever thought we were, two very different people that grew up by each other's side, that torme
Three months later...Lilly's POV"Lilly, it's your turn," Mrs. Garcia said, pulling me out of my thoughts and urging me to read my line.I shook my head as my eyes scanned the words written over the script in my hand, "It's just, I don't find this story realistic in any way," I commented, "What's the whole point of the lead girl? She is sad, she is weak and fragile," I scoffed, "And then just like that a guy comes and saves her. The feminist in me can't accept that!""No, no, it's not like that at all!" Mrs. Garcia said, offended by my accusations toward the main character in her play, "She has just been making all the wrong choices in her life, she didn't care about herself enough to make the right choice," She added, "She is a bit reckless, a little immature at times, but definitely not weak.""Somehow, she always picks the bad guys for her and that's how she reached here.""Sounds pretty realistic to me," Chase said from beside me, his lips curled up as his eyes traveled from Mrs.
Lilly's POVHis tone alone should've stirred fear in me, but instead I felt the anger spread over my chest and rage into my veins. I immediately pulled my hand out of his grip and turned around so fast that I can face him.My teeth gritted as my palm pressed over his chest and I pushed him away from me, placing distance between us, the way it should've been all along, "Don't you dare touch me!" I snapped, my tone matching his.His eyebrow raised, flames of rage danced in his eyes, the ones that I used to like so much. At the moment, I just wondered how. How did I ever like him? How could someone who looked so charming and nice be this much evil, "You think you can stop me from telling everyone what you did?" I challenged, not once backing away.He scoffed, "You think I'd just let you do that?"The threat in his tone almost made me laugh, "I am not scared of you, Zack," I said, honestly."But you should be.""We'll see about that when I tell uncle Ashton about what you've done, we'll l
Lilly's POVWaking up next to Chase, wrapped up in his warm embrace, wearing his clothes and smelling just like him, are things that I can get used to so easily.But I probably shouldn't, considering in a couple of months, he might not be here for me to do that anymore. Still, that won't stop me from sneaking these pleasurable moments and enjoying them as long as I can.My fingers gently moved up the side of his neck and made their way to his defined jaw. His light subtle brushed against my fingertips till they reached his soft kissable lips. I traced the lower one with my finger and contemplated on the idea of kissing him. Asleep or not, I really don't care. I've missed him like crazy.The logical part of my brain argued and flashed the words sexual assault in big red letters. I groaned in annoyance and my fingers resumed their discovery, tracing every little details. They moved up his nose and stopped by the threshold of his eyes.Sensing my touch, lines formed between his eyebrows
The hardness of his voice and his touch had my wide eyes drifting from my hand that I couldn't move then back to his face, "Christian, you are scaring me," I said, my voice low as I tried to break my arm free of his grip."You're scared?" He scoffed, "You have no idea what real fear feels like, Lilly," The look of pure disgust in his eyes had me gulping down, "Fear is opening the door to see your father's body there, killed in the most inhuman way," My stomach churned at the thought and he added, his voice and rage increasing with each word, "Fear is waking up after one hell of an explosion and not being able to move, for five hours, I couldn't move a muscle as I watched all of my friends there die because your fucking family thought that killing one man was worth burning up the whole damn asylum!"Asylum...explosion...the newspaper I just saw."My family?" I asked, weakly, nothing making sense, nothing.He nodded, "Yes, Lilly, your family," He said, "You see, it took everything in my
The second I opened the door for her, she shot out, "What did he do?" She asked and anger reflected off her eyes, already expecting that he did something.I ushered her to get inside and we sat down as I explained what happened and what he said at the end before he stormed out."Okay, I am gonna tell you something, Lilly," Sally started, her tone very serious, "Something that shows how everything about the way he dealt with this is very wrong."I nodded and she swallowed down hard, preparing herself before she said, "Conner and I kind of had a thing going on," She confessed and I wasn't surprised, "I know, it was kind of obvious, you guys were talking every day."She shook her head, "It's not like that, the summer before he left to uni, one time we were alone and one thing led to another and well," She gave me a knowing look, "We slept together."My eyes grew wide a bit, "Why didn't you tell me?" I asked."Chase had just left and you were not okay, and also Conner and I decided to not
One year later...Lilly's POVI am panicking.So very much panicking.I am in trouble. Big stupid trouble.Fuck.How could I be so damn stupid?My pulse took off a sprint as I stared down at the birth control pack, to see three pills are still left. I am supposed to have finished them all by today, twenty-eight days passed, twenty-eight pills, but no, three are left, which means...Fuck, how did I forget to take it three days in a row?Three freaking days!Jesus, Lilly, how could you be so stupid?I didn't even notice it when it happened.I pulled my phone and with my hand shaking, I checked the calendar, my mind calculating and trying to remember when this must've happened. It had to be about ten days ago, I had my exams and my graduation project presentation, I was so stressed. I usually take the pill first thing in the morning, considering I wasn't sleeping well during that time, I probably just forgot to take them.I am supposed to get my period in the following days, but what if I
****************One month later...Chase's POV"You think your dad will accept to be my reference?" Conner asked for the umpteenth time, "I mean I know that he loves me a lot," He added proudly, "You know that he once told me I am like the son he never had."I lowered my shades and turned around, giving him the most unimpressed look. He just rolled his eyes, "Anyways, I really need his reference, this company I am applying for is really big news, if I get accepted, I would do anything you want," The security pressed the card, allowing us to walk inside and I gave him a thank-you nod, "I might even kiss you from happiness."I winced at his words, "No, thank you."He narrowed his eyes at me before we walked into the elevator, "Uh, do you know that..." Conner cleared his throat, "That Lilly is here in LA for the summer?"I looked at him and nodded, "Yeah, my mother mentioned it the other day."His eyebrows pulled closer, as if expecting a bigger reaction, "Do you plan on seeing her?"I
************Lilly' POVHis words had me snapping and I walked out of my hiding, unable to take it anymore.My words had him leaving Christian and turning around, his eyes wide as they fell on me, "Lilly, what the hell are you doing here?" He snapped.I ignored his question and walked forward, "You want to tell the department about him, okay do it, but be sure that I will go and say it's me," I said, "If you're gonna drag his reputation down, you will be dragging mine along with it."I shook my head, "I am not gonna let you do that," I said, "Because, it's my life, whether I am gonna be with him or not, it's my decision and you can't...you just can't keep controlling my life forever!""Lilly, you are driving me insane, what you are doing is wrong, so do-""No, it is not wrong!"Anger and hurt clouded my chest at the way he's dealing with this, "Christian loves me and I love him as well, there is nothing wrong with that!"Dad looked taken aback, so did Christian and that's when I realiz
Lilly's POV"Dad, why did you do that!" I snapped as I rushed forward toward Christian, unable to comprehend what just happened.I expected his anger, but not his violence toward this.Christian whipped the blood from the side of his mouth before his eyes fell back on my dad, the muscles of his jaw worked, "I get how this looks like," He said, taking a step forward toward dad and I pulled at his sleeves as not to get close again, "But I am serious about everything that concerns your daughter."Dad's anger seemed to only multiply, "Serious you say?" He grated out in mockery and pointed at the door, "Get the fuck out of here and stay the hell away from her, or else your jaw isn't the only thing I will be breaking."I felt Christian is about to talk again and defend his intentions, but I pulled at his arm, stopping him, or else dad really won't stop, "Christian, just go," I urged and when his eye fell on me, I silently begged him to leave.I swallowed hard and nodded, silently telling hi
Monday"I should head out now," I said as I took the last sip of my martini and placed it down."Oh come on, it's your birthday, stay a bit late," Sally whined, and I only shook my head in return. I checked the time and calculated the time difference between us and LA, "I should head back home, I've got a pretty important call to make.""It's Mr. boyfriend, isn't it?" Sally asked, purposely not mentioning his name in front of our other friends, "I mean you were with him all over the past week," She scoffed, very annoyed, "You already celebrated together, today is supposed to be only ours!"Since I've already celebrated my birthday with Christian, tonight I agreed to Sally's proposition to go out and have some fun, with some of our other girl-friends from class, who also brought their boyfriends. I also asked Noah to join us, so we were not a very little group at the moment.I shook my head, gathering my things into my purse, "It's not Christian," I hissed at her, so no one else would
*****************After Christian took his shower, we went to bed, and almost immediately he fell asleep. He's been working really hard all over the past week, he was pulling on late hours at night to finish working on his project, even tomorrow which is Sunday, he will go to the university, to finish up a few things before his big presentation on Monday comes.So, the moment he placed his head on the pillow, he was a gone case.Me, on the other hand, I couldn't sleep at all. I kept thinking back to today's little incident, something just felt off, but for the love of me, I can't figure it out.Minutes and minutes later and a low groan vibrated from my chest, annoyed at my tired body that won't just rest and sleep.My back was to Christian, pressed right up against his chest and his arm was under me. I smiled again when I stared at his tattoo and finally understood the word written, but still on the inside of his arm and around the word laid different patterns, intertwined together an
Six months later...Lilly's POVI was close. So close.Wind whipped through around me, hot and hard, the sun blazing down from over-head. I increased my grip on the throttle, ticking it back a little more as I eased into the endpoint of the trackway. The engine warbled deep as I set a cautious but still a fast pace.An unstoppable smile crawled up my lips as I took a turn and halted the bike to a stop where everyone else was waiting for us. Adrenaline still pumped into my veins as I climbed off and took the helmet from over my head.I leaned against the bike and crossed my arms over my chest as I waited for Louis, who a minute later arrived with his bike. My eyebrow raised when he went off and shot me a hard glare, "This didn't just happen!""You mean me beating you?" I questioned proudly, "Oh yeah, I think it did."He looked around in frustration, "How in the hell-?" He rushed a hand over his face, "I can't believe this."Christian chuckled, pretty much impressed as he walked closer